Please Help Me! What If We're Wrong?

[Rolltide]

I hope i don’t go to hell for this, but i can’t believe in the extremes that are taught to us.

I teach history at a small private college in the South, and I like to explain the demands of Christianity this way. There are two types of rules in this world: the rules of men, and the rules of God. The rules of men (our laws, constitution, and so on) are written to a minimum standard. In other words, we try to write the minimum number of rules and laws that will allow society to function, while giving each of us the maximum amount of freedom to do what we want, regardless of morality. Christian moral rules are the exact opposite. They are intentionally written to the highest possible standard. Christian morality is written is such a way as to demonstrate how people would behave ideally, in a utopia. It is an unattainable standard, since humans are all sinners. So, with that in mind, most people live somewhere between the two standards. We generally rise above the bare minimum standard set by society, but none of us can match the perfection of God’s law. This is normal.

Now, think about it. Does that mean that because Christian morality is unattainable that we should change it? NO! It’s set out as a goal of absolute right and wrong for us to strive for. It always gives us the chance to better ourselves. If I give a history test in my class, and my students all get “C’s”, that doesn’t mean that I lower my standards to change what used to be a “C” to an “A”. It means I change my approach to teaching to try and get better performances out of my students. (It also doesn’t mean my students are failing the class… they’re just doing average.)

If i don’t confess my sins to a priest i will go to hell…

That’s not necessarily true at all. Once one is baptized, they are assured of going to heaven unless they commit a mortal sin. Venial sins may require time in Purgatory, but they are forgiven and you’ll still eventually end up in Heaven. Confession allows a way that we can be certain that we are forgiven for our mortal sins. Even without confession, it is possible to make an Act of Perfect Contrition directly to God, and this will allow us to be forgiven. However, this is quite hard to be certain of, and would still require a confession at the earliest possible convenience.

Let’s put it this way. Let’s say I’m mad at my little brother for not sharing his toy with me, and I go out and break it. Later on, I feel bad. Now, I may or may not be truly sorry I broke his toy. I could simply ask God for forgiveness, and then I go on with my life. Am I really sorry, or am I fooling myself? I may simply be scared of the consequences. Now, if I confess what I did to someone else, and agree to buy him a new toy at my own expense and tell him I’m sorry (my penance), is that not a good way of keeping me honest, so to speak? That’s the role of confession.

 

[Rolltide]

my biggest question is…and i hope i don’t go to hell for this, but i just wonder…WHAT IF WE’RE WRONG??? How do we know who has rhe right answer? don’t we all just follow what our family tells us is right?

You won’t go to hell for asking the question. In fact, Jesus lets us know through the story of doubting Thomas that one can question him and still go to Heaven. The story of Thomas, while sometimes seen as negative, is actually one of great hope to Christians, since we all have our doubts from time to time (even Mother Teresa, as was mentioned above). This doesn’t make you a bad person.

Now, how do we know that we’re right? Well, we have many prophesies from the Old and New Testaments that have come true, and that’s something that no other religion has to the extent that Catholicism has. We have had apparitions that have occurred even up until the present day, and no other religion really has that either. We also have a religion that has managed to remain constant over 2,000 years. It’s teachings on morality have not changed. That’s a mark of a solid religion, that it knows that human nature is the same regardless of the era of history.

I would strongly recommend to you the book “Four Witnesses: The Early Church in Her Own Words”. It describes what the early Christian Church was like from documents written by the first two generations of Christians. You’ll be surprised how Catholic they sound.

i now have a husband and two beautiful girls that have been baptised Catholic, but i have such a hard time getting us all to church because when we go the readings do not at all relate to us and neither do the sermons. I literally sit on the edge of my seat and try to relate to the sermon but all i get is “mankind has sinned, mankind is judgemental, mankind will go to hell…”

I guarantee that the readings do relate to our times. It may simply be that you have a priest who doesn’t give a sermon that relates to you. I would try two things. One, try attending a different parish. Priests range from giving great homilies to horrible homilies, just like any other person. Second, you might want to consider a good study Bible and learn some more on your own. The Ignatius Study Bible, while incomplete, is an outstanding resource for the New Testament, and the Navarre Study Bible is an excellent (albeit expensive) resource for the full Bible.

i want to be devout and i want to be a believer but i feel that i am being scolded more than i am being encouraged. I am so lost that i don’t bring our family to church as much anymore-and that makes me feel awful

A good priest will vary his homilies between the extremes of “If you do this, you will go to hell”, and “God loves you, no matter what”. People need to know that God is a loving God, but also that he expects certain things of us. Some priests tend to do one or the other. If you get too much of the first, you can get scrupulous and feel hopeless, like you currently do, and if you get too much of the second, you can feel that I have carte blanche to go out and do anything, and it’s ok because God will forgive me. There needs to be balance, and it doesn’t sound like you’re getting it right now. That’s why I’d recommend a different parish and some self-study. You might even want to approach a priest on a one-on-one basis.

 

[Rolltide]

This was written by Rebeccal on another thread:
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=211023&page=2

i just don’t know how my beliefs fit the mold for Catholicism. i have known so many children that have suffered so horribly. 18-year-olds that have begged me, “WHAT DID I EVER DO TO DESERVE TO SUFFER SO MUCH???” mind you, this has come to me from adopted children as well as those whose parent(s) attempted to raise them as they saw fit. I have seen kids kill themselves because they are so mortified by the life they are given.

This is absolutely true. In fact, this is why acts like pre-marital sex resulting in an unplanned pregnancy and physical abuse are so evil! It is precisely because these acts often have dramatic and awful long-term effects on the completely innocent.

i also know that homosexuality is NOT a choice, it is a biological differentiation-the actual make up of the brain of a homosexual is different than that of a heterosexual. this has been well proven by science, yet porported God-fearing people continue to judge and shame those with this BIOLOGICAL anomalie.

This is not proven by science, although it is a fair working theory. Another recent theory blames a fault in human pheremone reception. Catholicism is very specific in its requirements that there be no prejudice against homosexuals! They are humans worthy of love, just like everyone else. That said, Catholicism considers the homosexual act a sin, just like premarital heterosexual sex. Both should be treated the same way. Now, if you argue that they simply can’t help it, there are a variety of handicaps that people are born with or acquire that they have to live with. Just because someone is an alcoholic doesn’t mean I should give in and let them have alcohol because they can’t help it, and although someone who is grossly overweight should be treated as a normal person, they are still endangering their health.

today’s society is just not what it was 2000 year sago. i think that asking anyone, especially our youth, to live as life dictated 2000 years ago is not only beyond reason, but it completely alienates our children. how on earth can we expect our children to be open and honest with us when we are telling them to live a life that is just not compatable with modern society.
we evolve, i think our church should too. there hasn’t been a change since the 2nd Vatican and that was half a century ago. i guess what i am trying to say is how can be put all of our faith into an institution that doesn’t take into consideration the times and trials we have TODAY? Obviously, God created us with the intent for us to evolve, why then, would he be so unaccepting of our evolution?

Because evolution has nothing to do with morality. As a professional historian, I can tell you that our society is quite similar to that of the Romans. The Romans had a law structure similar to us, had practiced democracy (at least for a while), and had a sexually promiscuous culture. Christians were considered revolutionaries and reviled. They were forced underground and executed because they “couldn’t fit in with modern society”. In fact, Christian morality is easier and more applicable now than at any time in human history. Early Christians were never expected to fit into “modern society”. They were expected to rise above its flaws.

I would argue that the fact that the Dogmas of the Catholic Church haven’t changed once in 2,000 years is indeed one of the marks that it is the True Church. Doctrines and traditions can change, but never dogmas. Not one piece of morality changed during Vatican II, or Vatican I, or even at Trent. That said, the Catholic Church certainly does take into consideration modern times. It is constantly evaluating new moral problems never envisioned 2,000 years ago, such as stem cell research, cloning, persistent vegetative states, and so on. It also, of course, tries to show how the moral teachings of Jesus are still relevant today.

 

[Rolltide]

Quoted from Rebeccal on another thread:
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=211023&page=2

Planned Parenthood prevented me from getting pregnant by an abusive boyfriend. yes, i had pre-marital sex, but at least i had some education, understanding and protection before i did or i would have borne and raised a child in an abusive and horribly negative enviorment.

I do not want to judge your actions since you are very sincere and frankly, only God can judge your actions. I simply want to point what the Catholic morality would have to say about the issue, from an ideal standpoint (realizing that ALL people are flawed). First, the reason abuse is evil is because it preys on the innocent. That’s why it’s evil in the first place. Your abusive boyfriend would bear the responsibility for this act. It has nothing to do with getting pregnant. With all due respect, surely Planned Parenthood was not the only way to prevent a baby from having to deal with the abusive boyfriend. There is adoption, counseling for the father, services for battered women, and so on. The child was not predestined to an abusive situation, although I do not know your situation. Life always has options. Some are better, some are worse, some are easier, some are harder. Again, please don’t feel that I’m judging your decision. I’m only trying to bring up what the other alternatives were.

The second moral problem was the pre-marital sex. Catholicism says that it is wrong for several reasons. It can result in the transmission of sexually transmitted diseases, which can harm and even kill you. It can result in the creation of a life that was never meant to be created, and so the parents have no means to take care of it. It can cause the child to be born with only one parent, giving it no firm male role model, and a much greater risk of financial difficulty. It can also undermine the sanctity of marriage, making sex something that’s pursued out of selfishness for gratification, rather than out of love. I’m sure you well know this, however.

Just because people are imperfect doesn’t mean that the Church should change it’s teachings. People fail to live up to ideals. It’s like someone seriously trying to quit smoking. When you fall off the wagon, you don’t see your doctor saying, “Oh well, just try to cut back from two packs a day to a pack a day”. Instead, he gives you the patch, and tells you to stop cold turkey and get right back on the wagon again. The Catholic Church cannot teach that condoms are ok “if you’re going to go ahead and sin anyway…”, because it cannot condone the act of sinning in the first place. Better to let people fail and pick themselves up than to lower their standards. Society cannot function in that way.

A great example of this is prostitution in Amsterdam. Many years ago it was legalized saying that “Well, if they’re going to do it anyway, we’ll make it as safe as we can and regulate it”. Well, within the last two to three years, the rampant rise in organized crime, the attraction to Amsterdam of those looking for “sex tourism”, and a huge increase in sexually transmitted diseases despite regular testing has caused them to start cleaning up the red light district, and in fact, many are considering a return to a complete ban. You cannot eliminate the consequences of sin by simply making it legal.

i now have two beautiful, wonderful children with a doting and loving father; we are happily married and i thank God every day that i was allowed to have children in a loving and supportive environment. Jesus forgave and healed the Lepers, but we can’t we accept eachother? this is part of my loss of faith; i really don’t think Jesus was so judgemental!

I am so very thankful that you are out of your abusive situation and into such a great one now. Certainly this is a huge blessing in your life. A huge part of the Catholic Church is realizing that we can all be forgiven for our mistakes, if we just acknowledge them, and that we ALL make mistakes. Jesus was not judgmental, but he did ask people to turn from their sins and not do them again.

 

[Rolltide]

Rebeccal originally posted this comment here:
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=211023

this kind of “all or nothing” kind of thinking is what has perpetuated me falling away from the church. How can one make a “rule” that is supposed to apply to everyone despite their situation?

Hopefully, from the comments above, you’re starting to understand that the Church makes rules to prevent pain and heartache, not to judge them. The whole point of the Christian morality is to deal with what would happen in a perfect world. Of course we will not live up to that, but when we fail, we don’t change the rules, we ask for forgiveness.

i am so lost right now but i am getting the message that i don’t belong to a religion that is judgemental and hurtful! i cry as i type this, but after reading all these posts, i see so much lack of understanding and acceptance! whatever, go be perfect without me…

Sometimes, individual members of any religion can be judgmental. They are not supposed to be this way, but all humans have flaws. One of the beauties of Catholicism is that it is very morally unambiguous. It tries to be as specific as possible, because it does NOT believe in moral relativism (that morality is different for different people depending on their beliefs). On this board, you will naturally find the most conservative elements of Catholicism (since people who don’t take their religion seriously would likely not post on a board like this). For that reason, you might find some people on here that aren’t able to see gray areas very well.

 

[Rolltide]

Rebeccal, we are here to help you find answers, or direct you to those that can. All of us on here are praying that you find some peace with your spiritual situation. Please feel free to ask any questions that you like. May God bless you on your journey.

 

[Catholig]

You won’t go to hell for asking the question. In fact, Jesus lets us know through the story of doubting Thomas that one can question him and still go to Heaven. The story of Thomas, while sometimes seen as negative, is actually one of great hope to Christians, since we all have our doubts from time to time (even Mother Teresa, as was mentioned above). This doesn’t make you a bad person.

I was told that any willful doubt or entertained doubt is a (mortal) sin.

Catholig

 

[LilyM]

I was told that any willful doubt or entertained doubt is a (mortal) sin.

Catholig

What makes doubt (or indeed any other emotion) wilful or deliberately entertained and hence sinful? We’re not in full control of our thoughts and feelings.

If you have sufficient knowledge and evidence that a reasonable person wouldn’t (or probably wouldn’t) doubt but still do, that’s very likely grave matter. Not to say mortal sin, and be careful in throwing around the word ‘mortal’, since there are several other requirements that must be met for it to be mortal sin.

What’s to say the OP has anything like enough knowledge or evidence about her faith to make her doubts wilful or deliberately entertained?

 

[Catholig]

What makes doubt (or indeed any other emotion) wilful or deliberately entertained and hence sinful? We’re not in full control of our thoughts and feelings.

If you have sufficient knowledge and evidence that a reasonable person wouldn’t (or probably wouldn’t) doubt but still do, that’s very likely grave matter. Not to say mortal sin, and be careful in throwing around the word ‘mortal’, since there are several other requirements that must be met for it to be mortal sin.

What’s to say the OP has anything like enough knowledge or evidence about her faith to make her doubts wilful or deliberately entertained?

Lily,

I don’t know the benchmark used, however my idea of what they mean by willful (or entertained) is when you admit that you allow the idea that the Church can be wrong, or not the true Church. Personally I’m dealing with this now - I asked on another thread, and didn’t get any good answers. I prayed the 5 day novena for a rose from Therese of the Child Jesus asking for either a pink rose if the Catholic Church is true, or a red one if the Orthodox Church is true - I didn’t receive any roses. I want to study the early Church Fathers & Orthodoxy, but haven’t because I don’t want to get further into sin. I now have doubts about Jesus, and feel that nothing can be proven one way or the other. I don’t even know where I’m at spiritually - I feel that I might just be being rebellious, I want proof but I don’t expect to find any, I still pray to Jesus automatically in times of distress, I have thoughts against my soul all the time, and more. I feel totally confused - and probably due to my own “fault”.

Catholig

 

[Rolltide]

Lily,

I don’t know the benchmark used, however my idea of what they mean by willful (or entertained) is when you admit that you allow the idea that the Church can be wrong, or not the true Church. Personally I’m dealing with this now - I asked on another thread, and didn’t get any good answers. I prayed the 5 day novena for a rose from Therese of the Child Jesus asking for either a pink rose if the Catholic Church is true, or a red one if the Orthodox Church is true - I didn’t receive any roses. I want to study the early Church Fathers & Orthodoxy, but haven’t because I don’t want to get further into sin. I now have doubts about Jesus, and feel that nothing can be proven one way or the other. I don’t even know where I’m at spiritually - I feel that I might just be being rebellious, I want proof but I don’t expect to find any, I still pray to Jesus automatically in times of distress, I have thoughts against my soul all the time, and more. I feel totally confused - and probably due to my own “fault”.

Catholig

It sounds a bit like you’re experiencing the “Dark Night of the Soul” that St. John of the Cross experienced and wrote about in the book of the same name (and more recently experienced by Mother Teresa, as also chronicled in the new book about her). You may want to consider reading those two books.

I’m also not an expert, but I think your benchmark is a bit too high. Someone else please correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe that when they mean that doubt has to be willful or entertained to be sinful, they’re considering someone who has doubts and begins to turn from the faith. Thomas had doubts, but continued to practice his faith. If someone has a doubt, but continues to practice, go to Mass, pray, and do what is required, he is overcoming those doubts even though it might be difficult. If, instead, those doubts stop them from going to Mass, or they begin to reject Jesus, then that would constitute a sin. Mother Teresa, for example, eventually came to consider her doubts as a test from God.

 

[Catholig]

It sounds a bit like you’re experiencing the “Dark Night of the Soul” that St. John of the Cross experienced and wrote about in the book of the same name (and more recently experienced by Mother Teresa, as also chronicled in the new book about her). You may want to consider reading those two books.

I’m also not an expert, but I think your benchmark is a bit too high. Someone else please correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe that when they mean that doubt has to be willful or entertained to be sinful, they’re considering someone who has doubts and begins to turn from the faith. Thomas had doubts, but continued to practice his faith. If someone has a doubt, but continues to practice, go to Mass, pray, and do what is required, he is overcoming those doubts even though it might be difficult. If, instead, those doubts stop them from going to Mass, or they begin to reject Jesus, then that would constitute a sin. Mother Teresa, for example, eventually came to consider her doubts as a test from God.

Personally I don’t think that what I’m experiencing is the “dark night of the soul”, which I believe to be a period of spiritual dryness, wherein one doesn’t find “consolation” in god/the faith, at least emotionally. What I’m going through is serious doubt regarding my faith, and faith in general. I want to believe, but then again…I have other things going on, and I find it impossible just to say “now I’m not going to explore any other religion (even an apostolic Christian Church)”. And a priest told me that it’s a sin to consciencly allow for the idea that the Catholic Church isn’t the True Church of God, presumably because it is endangering one’s faith. This would most certainly eliminate any research done from a “neutral/objective” point of view. You’d have to approach the research from the view point that the Catholic Church is true if you can do any research at all (and as we all know that means that you’ll find those things confirming your view more than you would otherwise).

Catholig

 

[fellowChristian]

Born again through the waters of baptism into the Catholic Church as a baby.

And as an adult a Catholic by choice.

I have no doubts that the Holy Spirit guided me to the answers I prayed for. I did not know anything about our Faith. I had blind faith. Through studing the history of Christianity I learned that all churches were started by men. Except two. The Jewish Faith and the Catholic Faith. Jesus is God,He founded only one church around 33ad. The Protestant denominations began breaking off in 1517ad. and between 33ad until 1517 there were no such things as “protestants” “faith alone”
“Bible alone” and “rapture”. These things are “new age” stuff only 490 years old. We know that Jesus’ church is older then all those things.
Just looking at a list of popes shows how far back Catholicism goes newadvent.org/cathen/12272b.htm

Even if you can’t except Peter as 1st head bishop or Father of our church (pope is Italian it means poppa) how about the second pope? Or the third? What about the 4th pope? He wrote letters too. You can read them today.

As for getting the family off to church…

I have a family of seven plus my daughter’s boyfriend attends with us and now his two brothers. The way we do it? Routine!!

Everyone has “Sunday” clothes hanging in the closet.The only time they wear them is on yup you guessed it! Sunday! My 8,9,and 10 year old boys have black slacks,white dress shirts,black belts,ties,black shoes, and jackets. They wear them from 10:00 am until 12:30pm then come home and hang them. They get washed after they’ve worn them three times. The girls have different dresses and outfits just for Sunday. We have a routine. And I work a graveyard shift so 11:00 am is when we go to Mass. Which is good because everyone is awake and has had breakfast. We have a big lunch when we come home. It works for our family. Our children now altar serve and can be heard after Mass saying “I love coming to church”. It wasn’t always easy but oh I am so glad I stuck it out I carried my cross and this is my reward! Thank you Jesus!

 

[Subrosa]

Hi rebeccal, and welcome to the forums! This is a good place for questions, so stick with it.

I hope i don’t go to hell for this, but i can’t believe in the extremes that are taught to us. If i don’t confess my sins to a preist i will go to hell…

The Sacrament of Confession is a tough one to understand. Many non-Catholic christians simply state that we can go right to God with the confession.

But consider this…Jesus spent alot of time forgiving sins while he was in His ministry. If it is so important, why would He not leave a ministry? In fact He did. If you read the Gospel of John chapter 20, verse 23 you will see a very direct statement: “*If you forgive anyone his sins, they are forgiven; if you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven.” *If you read from verse 19 you will see that He was speaking to His disciples. He actually did leave a ministry for forgiveness. That ministry still exists today and the priests are the proper ministers.

The Sacrament is also called the “Sacrament of Reconciliation.” If you read 2 Corinthians 5:11-21 you will see that Paul speaks of this ministry, which he calls the “ministry of reconciliation.” Read verse 20 carefully. It says *“We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.” *Paul here says that WE ARE AMBASSADORS! Then he says, AS THOUGH GOD WERE MAKING HIS APPEAL THROUGH US!

These are very important to understanding the Sacrament. They show that the ministry Jesus established in John 20:23 is active past His death and resurrection and there were ministers (WE = plural). It is important to note that the ministry reconciles us with God. It is there for our benefit, not our humiliation. When a priest tells you that your sins are absolved, they are absolved as per Jesus’ words in John 20:23.

Paul also eludes to it in other passages. 2 Corinthians 2:10 says, “Whomever you forgive anything, so do I. For indeed what I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, has been for you in the presence of Christ” Here Paul says he is in the “presence of Christ” when he forgives anything. Specifically he is speaking of someone in the Corinthian community.

Verse 6 says, “*This punishment by the majority is enough for such a person” *See here that punishment has been given to the individual being spoken of.

Likewise, the priest will give a penance when you confess. In the early church the confession was public. It soon became evident that that was a bad idea! They became private soon after.

my biggest question is…and i hope i don’t go to hell for this, but i just wonder…WHAT IF WE’RE WRONG??? How do we know who has rhe right answer? don’t we all just follow what our family tells us is right?

Have FAITH!!! this has been around for 2000 years! It works!

i now have a husband and two beautiful girls that have been baptised Catholic, but i have such a hard time getting us all to church because when we go the readings do not at all relate to us and neither do the sermons. I literally sit on the edge of my seat and try to relate to the sermon but all i get is “mankind has sinned, mankind is judgemental, mankind will go to hell…”

It is important that you take up studying the bible. When reading it, do some research on whatever specific topic you need help on. There is plenty to be had. You can always feel free to post questions here on the forums.

God bless,
Subrosa

 

[jwashu]

i was raised with no firm religious identity. my father was a jehova’s witness so Christmas and my birthday didn’t occur until i was 3. My mom sent me to Lutheran church for a while but i stopped attending because i was so embarassed to not know my “baptismal date” (i didn’t have one due to the religion in which i was born)…
I then worked in a convent for several years and was so moved by what i was taught by the sisters that i converted to catholasism. I was finally baptised-my Godmother is an SSND that i love dearly.

I hope i don’t go to hell for this, but i can’t believe in the extremes that are taught to us. If i don’t confess my sins to a preist i will go to hell…

my biggest question is…and i hope i don’t go to hell for this, but i just wonder…WHAT IF WE’RE WRONG??? How do we know who has rhe right answer? don’t we all just follow what our family tells us is right?

i now have a husband and two beautiful girls that have been baptised Catholic, but i have such a hard time getting us all to church because when we go the readings do not at all relate to us and neither do the sermons. I literally sit on the edge of my seat and try to relate to the sermon but all i get is “mankind has sinned, mankind is judgemental, mankind will go to hell…”

i want to be devout and i want to be a believer but i feel that i am being scolded more than i am being encouraged. I am so lost that i don’t bring our family to church as much anymore-and that mekes me feel awful

I know we as Catholics don’t “Parish Shop” but if you are getting nothing from sermons you might considering going to Mass at another Parish from time to time, just for a change.

Remember that our Mass is a Family Meal where we Worship and Praise God. The Sermon is important but it’s not the central part of our worship, God is.

With 3 young sons (5,3, and 10 months) it’s difficult to hear anything during Mass on most days since our Parish dosen’t offer child care, even for the youngest. Thus from time to time my wife and I will split the kids up and go to separate Masses. Since we are both in RCIA we want to make sure we are getting everything. As I was a Protestant Youth Minister for a while and worked on an Catholic Youth Retreat I have a big head start on her thus I try watch the boys as much as possible (still crazy with 3 though).

Do not feel bad about the religious identity stuff. My wife, who’s grandfather is a Baptist minister, was never Baptised. I nor my one of my best friends and former Presbyterian minister knew this… we both “assumed” that when she was “saved” she was Baptised. Apparently that wasn’t the case. Thus after almost 20 years as a Presbyterian she is now coming for Baptism which will happen this Easter at our Parish. This shook her up at first that she felt left out but I believe has since seen it in some ways as a blessing.

In regards to your greater question I would say that we know through prayer and study. Some protestants grif converts because they always talk about reading the Early Church Fathers… which I did. However it was truly the Scriptures, looking at the Bible as a whole and Prayer that has lead me home to the Church founded by Christ.

Perhaps you should attend the “Why Catholic” sessions at your parish, that may help a great deal with some of your questions. Also read the “Ask an Apologist” second here, there is a ton of information there.

In Christ,
Joe