Please Pray For Bad Decision

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psr13

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Long story short, I’ve always had very strong beliefs about pre-marital sex. I’m 21, and have always been a virgin. That is until last night. Even though I’ve never wanted to have sex until marriage, I’ll talk about it. I’m trying to work on the way I talk. So, on Monday I was really bored and all my friends were at work. I texted my best friend and got his brother’s phone number. I texted him bad things for two days. I had all intentions of only being a tease with this. We’ve never met each other, and I never thought we would. Well, yesterday for some reason I got really curious about him. I actually went over there. I had no intentions of actually doing anything. One thing led to another, and I am unfortunately no longer a virgin. I feel so dirty and ashamed about this. I’m not telling my friends, especially my best friend, or my family. I’m supposed to be the good one in the group. I was just hoping that you guys would pray that I can forgive myself for doing this. I would really appreciate it. I’m having a very hard time in this area. I’m not a member of the Catholic Church as of yet, so I can’t even go to confession about this. And, I haven’t gone to church in awhile because my work keeps scheduling me during church services. That means I have no priest to go to about it. Thank you all so much.
 
Sad story!

I also learned that though sometimes we don’t take them seriously, God and the Devil are always serious.

I ll pray for your peace.

:gopray2:
 
We are human, and therefore, we sin. You were not the first to sin, nor will you be the last. The only ones who did not sin were Mary and Jesus.

So, take a deep breath. And you can still go see a priest - I’m SURE he would be more than happy to talk to you.

Circumstances (even bad ones) can make us realize what is and isnt important. Maybe this will just help you refocus on how you want to live your life. Maybe this will be what you needed in order to start becoming a Catholic.

I wish I could give you a big hug.

If it makes you feel any better a similar thing happened to me when I was 26. Yes, I was older, but felt much the same way you do.

I am now married for 5 years to a wonderful man (obviously different from that guy haha!) and have a BEAUTIFUL child.

You’re going to be ok - I just know it. You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders, and you just made a mistake. We all do. But go find a priest and chat with him, it will make you feel better and help you in the direction you need to go. 🙂

Remember, God loves you.

Vester
 
psr13,

“I’m not a member of the Catholic Church as of yet, so I can’t even go to confession about this. And, I haven’t gone to church in awhile because my work keeps scheduling me during church services. That means I have no priest to go to about it. Thank you all so much”.

Friend, i too am suppose to be the good one, i too have sinned, not in this way but another. We all sin. Make time and sit alone, be still with God, talk to Him as you would a friend. Ask our loving Father’s forgiveness and be a peace. Do try to make time to go to Church, you will find comfort there. If you need me i will be there for you. i am praying for you…:crossrc:

Chyna
 
psr13 said:
. And, I haven’t gone to church in awhile because my work keeps scheduling me during church services. That means I have no priest to go to about it. Thank you all so much.
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yes, you do. check out other churches for confession and mass times other than your work hours, call any priest for an appointment on your lunch hour or after work, and if necessary take an hour of sick leave, it is that serious that you get to confession and get help with habits that are very destructive to every aspect of your life. Oh, and get the text messaging feature on your phone disabled. the prayers you may take for granted as we are pretty good prayer warriors.
 
Don’t despair. As other good folks above me here have stated, you can seek counsel with a priest and you can be forgiven and the best part is that if you are sincerely sorry and have a firm purpose of amendment and resolve to never do this again, you have made Our Father SO happy. We stumble, we fall. The sin is in not recognizing our failures and honestly resolving to do better. I know you can and you will. My prayers go with you my dear.:hug1:
 
Thank you all so much. I am most definitely 100% sorry for doing this. I know that pre-marital sex is completely wrong. It’s completely out of my character. Right after it was over I prayed. Man, I lost my virginity to my best friend’s brother. It’s just horrible. Oh yeah, there was no protection used. Yes, I know that was REALLY stupid. I’ve always told myself I would never have pre-marital sex, especially without protection. According to online things, now is when I’m most fertile, too. I’ve definitely been praying that I don’t get pregnant from this. He says he doesn’t have any STD’s, but I know that I still need to get that checked.

If I work Sunday I’m going to start attending Saturday Vigil. The problem is when I work both days. I work at an amusement park, so those are the busiest days. Will a priest still talk to me if I don’t attend his church regularly as of yet? And don’t you have to be Catholic to go to confession?

I can’t get texting messaging disabled because that’s how I stay in contact with people. I really despise talking on the phone, as do the rest of my friends. I will stop using it for those very bad purposes, though. Not only does it cause me to sin, but it also causes the man to sin.
 
psr13 said:
Long story short, I’ve always had very strong beliefs about pre-marital sex. I’m 21, and have always been a virgin. That is until last night. Even though I’ve never wanted to have sex until marriage, I’ll talk about it. I’m trying to work on the way I talk. So, on Monday I was really bored and all my friends were at work. I texted my best friend and got his brother’s phone number. I texted him bad things for two days. I had all intentions of only being a tease with this. We’ve never met each other, and I never thought we would. Well, yesterday for some reason I got really curious about him. I actually went over there. I had no intentions of actually doing anything. One thing led to another, and I am unfortunately no longer a virgin. I feel so dirty and ashamed about this. I’m not telling my friends, especially my best friend, or my family. I’m supposed to be the good one in the group. I was just hoping that you guys would pray that I can forgive myself for doing this. I would really appreciate it. I’m having a very hard time in this area. I’m not a member of the Catholic Church as of yet, so I can’t even go to confession about this. And, I haven’t gone to church in awhile because my work keeps scheduling me during church services. That means I have no priest to go to about it. Thank you all so much.
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Will pray for you. God can forgive anything. We’re all sinners and just have to keep plugging away at bettering ourselves. Hang in there!

:blessyou:
 
Wow. If you were my daughter, I’d be giving you the ((BIGGEST HUG IN THE WORLD)) right now. You made a mistake, you want to confess it, and you want to make things right. You stayed a virgin this long? That alone takes a *great woman *to do. I am so proud of you!

Just call a nearby parish and ask if there is a priest that will see you for a private matter, or if you can go to confession~ I know they will be glad to help!

If Jesus were here right now I think he would have his arms held wide open for you. After confession, you might like to sit before the Tabernacle or the Blessed Sacrament (if they have it) and just pray, then listen & let Jesus fill your heart.

I’ll pray for you to get rightback on track. You alredy know everything you need to do.
 
I most definitely cannot tell my family. My family judges all the time. It was bad enough when my sister got pregnant by her long time boyfried. I have no idea what gossip this would cause. Two people know. A really close friend who I consider my brother, and a friend from work. They don’t hangout with my other friends, so they can’t let it slip to them.
 
I most definitely cannot tell my family. My family judges all the time. It was bad enough when my sister got pregnant by her long time boyfried. I have no idea what gossip this would cause. Two people know. A really close friend who I consider my brother, and a friend from work. They don’t hangout with my other friends, so they can’t let it slip to them.
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Did someone here say you should tell your family? I must have missed that part. I wouldn’t suggest it, not unless something comes of it (pregnancy), but its unlikely that will happen. It could, but that’s putting the cart before the horse.
So long as you plan on not repeating the behavior there’s no need for them to know. I’d move on once the sin has been forgiven and only look forward.
 
I thought when you mentioned the mom you thing you might mean that. Thank you for everything you have said. The whole pregnancy thing is scaring me so much because I guess this is when I’m most likely to get pregnant. So yeah. I’m doing much better than I was yesterday. I’ve decided to try to not freak out and if something comes of it, I’ll deal with it then.
 
Remember a chaplet of divine mercy is most helpful. And it is very easy you can say it while you are working.
Tomorrow its friday. I can also suggest that you try to saying through the day and specially during 0300 pm the hour of mercy. If it is hard for the day, you can try your best to have the 3-4 pm hour less busy so you can offer few chaplets. The Lord will give you Peace and more light and courage in your situation.

Stay courageous and trust God. Remember even if you are not catholic yet, you can say those prayers. And if they are still hard during work. You can do the simple prayer of Divine Mercy: “Jesus, I trust in You”

May the peace of God be with you
 
Aboout confession, I think if you already believe in everything the Catholic Church teaches, you can have a valid confession. May be you the priest to baptize you and hear your confession. I also heard of baptism of desire. I don’t know what the priest will suggest but I think you should try to see him.
 
I am trying to see a priest. I don’t need baptism, since I was batptized in a Christian church previously. What I need is the confirmation part.
 
Granted priests work weekends, but they work weekdays too. If you are uncomfortable, just schedule an appointment during the week to talk. No one says you have to be Catholic to talk to a priest. I will offer your intentions up at my next rosary
 
you might have been baptised-but was it valid?you need also to know the importance of the sacrament you recieve,im not 100% sure but i think that yes you can go to confession but the priest may not be able to absolve you of your sin because you are not catholic-you cant pick and choose what you want with our faith-its all or nothing.and obviously you are going to be ashamed of your situation so a face to face incounter is not really what you want-best option is to go at confession time,go into the confessional and sit down and say “father,i am not a catholic,i want to be and i need to talk to you about my sins and my life and what you think i should do” and this way you wont run the risk of sacrilage.

i still want to ask you one thing though-are you sorry because you fear hell or do you fear that you have offended and hurt Jesus or are you sorry for some other reason?

answer this question in total honesty because your eternal life depends upon it:yup:
i’ll explain once you reply!
 
I’m sorry because I honestly feel that pre-marital sex is wrong and completely against the Bible. It isn’t because I don’t want to go to Hell. It’s because Jesus would be truly sad and heartbroken over my actions, as am I.

My baptism was valid in the sense that when I start RCIA I won’t have to be re-baptized. It was trinitarian in formula. Most churches around here don’t have confessionals, so it would be a face to face either way.
 
mahleh said:
Granted priests work weekends, but they work weekdays too. If you are uncomfortable, just schedule an appointment during the week to talk. No one says you have to be Catholic to talk to a priest. I will offer your intentions up at my next rosary
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I said the Saturday and Sunday thing, becuase I was explaining why I can’t often go to Sunday Mass or Saturday Vigil.
 
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