Please pray for me--desperate--no support

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lynnehelen

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The police are denying that I was tasered last July or that I was even Baker-Acted. My new doctor acted hatefully toward me–or did she? She did something that offended me, and I reacted, and she wouldn’t take my calls, then did a test I have been waiting on since last May, and now I have been hurting from it for two days, don’t know if she was rough on purpose or not, don’t know whether I need to seek a new doctor. My psychotherapist seemed to be at odds with her and now he won’t respond to my calls, was it winding down anyway?

My husband WON’T LEAVE. He has brain damage. He got it from a fall while we were already in the midst of the ugly and bitter divorce. He has been seeing other women for years. He is INCREASINGOY present at home, always saying the same four things when he comes in, “I’m lloking for another place, I want a divorce, my girlfriend…, are you jealous of her?” And then tells me he still loves me the best. He was let go from his contract yesterday, won’t admit it, he came home on a Wednesday three weeks early.

I am flat out of money and he won’t repond to my divorce lawyer, he gives me a little here and there and is still paying the mortgage and utilities.

I had a two-hour fight with my son the morning before the test, I felt like I’d been raped then had to go for a gyn test with a doctor I didn’t trust. Then husband enters the picture. I was up all night because I couldn’t get him to go to bed until 3;30, he was drinking, as usual, put sneakers in the dryer under my and my son’s room at 1:00 am and woke me when I really needed to sleep through the night and today I am so stressed I barely know what’s going on, not suicidal, went there for about a split second and dismissed it, but could be manipulated back onto a psych ward.

That was my other call today. I called to tell the psych ward they take me to I couldn’t pay the bill and let them know about not receiving blood presssure medication while I was a patient.

Also in a dispute over early termination of lease on apt which i needed to keep things steady here but could no longer afford.

I am getting deeply paranoid and my husband’s presence prevents me from staying active and positive. Also he may not give me any money (he is supposed to be providing interim support.) but he may not be able to work. I am so stressed it is physically unbearable and I’ve been here before and didn’t ever want to be here again.

I turned to Jesus for comfort but I also need practical help and support. The DIoscese did not return my phone call about RCIA classes.

I am PHYSICALLY disabled. My body is a mess. My family (mother and father) only make things worse and I have cut them out.

things don’t look good from here

I have reread this and it sounds really selfish to me because I am turning spiteful and mean like everybody around me…
 
Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death.
Amen.
 
somehow got through the day and night, things got worse, not better, and now I am in fear he may have filed an injunction against me this afternoon. He said “goodbye” after I threw out his dietary powders (he gets them from his girlfriend), because he threw out my coffee because he thought I poured out his vodka, which I didn’t. This was in the middle of the night, but my sleep is so disordered and I was in such a panic I stayed up until 9 or so. My first fear was that he was going to call the police, as I said, I have an issue with them and it would be pretty if I were committed again. Terrifying, in fact.

Altogether I called my lawyer (the one who takes calls out of hours) three times and he did not respond. So I enrolled in the county public records search so that I could check myself. I don’t see anything there, but I don’t know if it would have posted yet. So I am stuck waiting until Monday at 9 as they serve injunctions M-f 9-5 as far as I am aware.

But my son did make it to his meeting with my counselor about his situation at his new public high school, and although he is being evasive when I question him about whether he knows anything about an injunction, otherwise we are getting along.

I am calmer now, and sense the Lord’s presence. I am following the rule of taking each day as it comes, and letting Monday worry about Monday. In the meantime, suddenly it has become early Saturday morning and I am still up. The whole thing grew out of my medical issues, he came home early from his contract and after fighting with my son in the morning I couldn’t face having Alex here at night, I was laying down feeling weak, sick, and tired and desperate to sleep through the night, and new I would have to face male aggression.

Thank you for your prayers. They got me through it. Erine, I did PM you, I don’t know if I addressed it correctly or not, but it was very helpful to do so anyway. Thank you.

Right now I am just not knowing how to interact with him. He gets dangerously aggressive and hysterical and out of control and I feel so frail.
“He breaks open the skies for those who cry out His name” (quote from a popular Christian radio song.)
 
Lord, please help lynnehelen. Please grant her the deepest faith. May she persist in calling her diocese about RCIA classes … she could really be helped a lot by religious instruction. Please help her always to trust in your goodness and providence. And please keep her safe from all evil influences. Thank you, Lord, for hearing my prayer.
 
have support. see “terrified–injunction?”

got through the night.

thank you for YOUR support

God Bless You and keep you.

👍

:amen:
 
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