G
GodisWithin
Guest
I am in a very anxious stressed state of mind…I am tired and I had good intentions for mom and dad. Dad has terminal cancer and other conditions due to being a 100 % disabled Korean War Vet and is 78. My mother has advanced osteoporosis with multiple fractures and surgeries. I have to go to their house twice daily to help them cook clean. my mom can’t lift anything and needs help dressing and so forth, but so does dad.
I know this sounds even worse but even though my brother (49 yrs old----i am 42) lives with them, he is not reliable for them as he has a mental illness. Yes dad has one too----psychotic episodes—the whole shebang: hallucinations, delusions, paranoia. I don’t have the time to be stressed out with my mom crying in pain and because of worry. She messed herself up physically having to help dad, so she relies on me. The even more stressful thing is that I am married with a family, and a 2 yr old who needs as much attention as they do. I often have to leave my housework and laundry piling—I feel like I am in slow motion—I come home to rest and shake a bit from stress, and ignore the housework. Husband is understanding, and tries to help, but their are financial concerns he has to tend to.
My sister will not help. She is 54 retired and finacially stable and kids grown. I TRY to be understanding and unjudgemental of her, as I don’t know WHAT keeps her from helping out—so that I can at least have a day off. I have missed mass several times because my bro is laying up in bed, and my mom is too afraid to call sis, as sis rants about my brother being unhelpful. It also just makes me feel very taken for granted when my mom tells me how she encourages my sister to “ENJOY her retirement, since they are young and need to travel” I try to understand my mom is only trying to be positive. She tells me that “we don’t know the sorrows of another person”–refering to my sister and her possible reasons for staying away. I agree that we don’t know, but I still want to cry forever over being stuck.
Sis is actually bitter that my parents have already said they are leaving my brother their house. I say big deal—I don’t care—I just want to take care of my own family and stop this feeling that everything in me is beginning to shut down.
I know I vented. I am sorry for spitting it all out.
I know this sounds even worse but even though my brother (49 yrs old----i am 42) lives with them, he is not reliable for them as he has a mental illness. Yes dad has one too----psychotic episodes—the whole shebang: hallucinations, delusions, paranoia. I don’t have the time to be stressed out with my mom crying in pain and because of worry. She messed herself up physically having to help dad, so she relies on me. The even more stressful thing is that I am married with a family, and a 2 yr old who needs as much attention as they do. I often have to leave my housework and laundry piling—I feel like I am in slow motion—I come home to rest and shake a bit from stress, and ignore the housework. Husband is understanding, and tries to help, but their are financial concerns he has to tend to.
My sister will not help. She is 54 retired and finacially stable and kids grown. I TRY to be understanding and unjudgemental of her, as I don’t know WHAT keeps her from helping out—so that I can at least have a day off. I have missed mass several times because my bro is laying up in bed, and my mom is too afraid to call sis, as sis rants about my brother being unhelpful. It also just makes me feel very taken for granted when my mom tells me how she encourages my sister to “ENJOY her retirement, since they are young and need to travel” I try to understand my mom is only trying to be positive. She tells me that “we don’t know the sorrows of another person”–refering to my sister and her possible reasons for staying away. I agree that we don’t know, but I still want to cry forever over being stuck.
Sis is actually bitter that my parents have already said they are leaving my brother their house. I say big deal—I don’t care—I just want to take care of my own family and stop this feeling that everything in me is beginning to shut down.
I know I vented. I am sorry for spitting it all out.
, but the others all have their issues
. But we do it out of love and loyalty for what they did for us…so here is a prayer for you and yours.