Pondering: why marry inside a Church?

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hasikelee

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I have never even given a thought to marrying outside of a church. It just seemed normal to me and made sense as I’ve always viewed the sacrament as a nuptial mass.

Anyways, one of my coworkers asked why I wasn’t getting married in an outdoor ceremony. I told him the Church requires the sacrament to be done inside a Catholic church.

He asked why (sincerely) and that got me to wondering…why? The reasons I have seen and heard are that we bring Christ into the marriage and thus marry where he is present. And that it shows we are connected in marriage to the church.

But then he pointed out that our soldier friends in Iraq go to mass in a field and that in poor countries a priest might just give absolution to a whole crowd of people. He also mentioned babies being baptized at birth or when in danger of dying. And he pointed out Extreme Unction.

What is the fuller understanding of why Catholics must marry within a church? I hope to give him an answer tomorrow.
 
In a traditional Church I would always choose the Church for the proper setting. I think modern Roman Catholics who try to worship in a barren modern Church may have a difficult time not choosing the outdoors.

CDL
 
GregoryPalamas said:
In a traditional Church I would always choose the Church for the proper setting. I think modern Roman Catholics who try to worship in a barren modern Church may have a difficult time not choosing the outdoors.

CDL
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no matter what the architectural and decorative style of the church it is not barren if the Eucharist is celebrated there and reserved in the tabernacle.
 
puzzleannie said:
no matter what the architectural and decorative style of the church it is not barren if the Eucharist is celebrated there and reserved in the tabernacle.
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By modern architectural standards the Tabernacle could be moved to a folding table in the woods and that would suffice. Mind you, I’m not suggesting that.

CDL
 
why not have baptisms outside?
why not have FUNERAL Masses Outside?
why not have the annointing of the sick outside?
why not have confession outside?
why not have Holy Orders conferred outside?
why not have confirmation outside?
Or First Eucharist?

the same reason why not the norm goes for weddings. WHy in the world would anyone NOT want to kneel at the altar of GOD and join into the first and original covenental relationship with another human and GOD inside his Church. The church building is God and their spiritual families house. The Church Building is the . The Altar of is where the Sacrifice of CHrist takes place and the church is considered the home of the Parish Family. Marriage is a sacrament and explicitly a matter of faith. The Sacrament of Marriage is the initial and principle sign of Family…the parish Church is the physical symbol of Gods spiritual Family. Having an outdoor wedding distances this meaning.

Have the reception Outdoors but please consider the awe of kneeling at the Altar of the Lord while entering into this awesome Sacrament.

You can get a dispensation from the bishop but I heard it is Rare.
 
“But then he pointed out that our soldier friends in Iraq go to mass in a field and that in poor countries a priest might just give absolution to a whole crowd of people. He also mentioned babies being baptized at birth or when in danger of dying. And he pointed out Extreme Unction.”

Sounds like fishing to justify any outdoor wedding, which I understand is all the rage among the smart and unchurched set of this age.

It should occur to everyone and your friend as well that these are extraordinary situations, in which exceptions apply. Exceptions are exactly that, provisions for unusual circumstances in which something is not available or in which there is a serious danger.

They do not undermine your position (and that expressed by others) that sacred worship by the Church takes place in sacred places of the Church and with the sacred ministers of the Church. Exceptions do not undermine the reasons for norms. They do not disprove the validity of norms.

So I recommend that your friend evaluate the logic of his position, even on that basis alone.

Since marriage is not simply a human contract regulated by society, it is appropriate to celebrate its beginning in a house of worship and take cognizance of the fact that God instituted it and Christ elevated it, for the baptized, to the dignity of a sacrament. Since the couple enter into a special state in the Church, the body of Christ, through marriage, its official representative is present.

In danger of death or such battlefield conditions, indeed, it could also be possible for a Catholic cleric with faculties to witness the wedding of a couple otherwise free to marry, or a Catholic cleric without faculties to be present as the extraordinary form of marriage is used (before 2 witnesses). The other conditions in law, of course, would still have to be present.

But that too would be an exception.
 
hasikelee said:
I have never even given a thought to marrying outside of a church. It just seemed normal to me and made sense as I’ve always viewed the sacrament as a nuptial mass.

Anyways, one of my coworkers asked why I wasn’t getting married in an outdoor ceremony. I told him the Church requires the sacrament to be done inside a Catholic church.

He asked why (sincerely) and that got me to wondering…why? The reasons I have seen and heard are that we bring Christ into the marriage and thus marry where he is present. And that it shows we are connected in marriage to the church.

But then he pointed out that our soldier friends in Iraq go to mass in a field and that in poor countries a priest might just give absolution to a whole crowd of people. He also mentioned babies being baptized at birth or when in danger of dying. And he pointed out Extreme Unction.

What is the fuller understanding of why Catholics must marry within a church? I hope to give him an answer tomorrow.
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In every instance your friend gave you of a sacrament occurring outside a Church were extra-ordinary. The men and women in a war zone hearing Mass with the hood of a jeep as the altar is an unusual circumstance. The infant in danger of death being baptized at the hospital is an unusual circumstance. Also, I seriously doubt if a Priest would give general absolution to a crowd of people just because he is in a poor country.

Now as for Extreme Unction, the ordinary place of this Sacrament is at the bedside of the person receiving it, or if one is going to major surgery and asks for it prior to entering the hospital, in an office or home.

So to answer the question - the ordinary place for the sacrament of matrimony is on consecrated ground, in a Church, and yes, with Jesus present in the Tabernacle whether the Tabernacle is in some side room or odd place or not.

Brenda V.
 
May I ask a question in this particular section? This is my first time and it’s the reason I checked into this.

My boyfriend and I were each married outside of the Catholic Church. I am a widow and he is divorced. We dated in high school over 40 years ago!!

We have decided to marry and would like to get married in the Church, by a priest. As to old beliefs, the Church did not recognize our marriages outside of the Church, so does that mean we may or may not marry in the Catholic Church this time?

Tkx, GeeWhiz
 
GeeWhiz said:
May I ask a question in this particular section? This is my first time and it’s the reason I checked into this.

My boyfriend and I were each married outside of the Catholic Church. I am a widow and he is divorced. We dated in high school over 40 years ago!!

We have decided to marry and would like to get married in the Church, by a priest. As to old beliefs, the Church did not recognize our marriages outside of the Church, so does that mean we may or may not marry in the Catholic Church this time?

Tkx, GeeWhiz
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You should really speak to a priest. My understanding is it depends on a number of factors. If your boyfriend is a Catholic and was married outside the Church, his marriage would presumably be invalid. He would need get a declaration from the marriage tribunal, but it would be relatively easy. If he was married in the Church, or is not Catholic, he would need to petition for a decree of nullity, which might or might not be granted, depending on the circumstances of his wedding.

Again, you need to speak to a priest, and perhaps a Canon lawyer.

God Bless
 
The problem in our diocese is when the diocese promotes a huge youth outdoor mass in the summer every year.

How can we turn around and deny anyone an outdoor wedding with any credibility?
 
PaixGioiaAmor said:
The problem in our diocese is when the diocese promotes a huge youth outdoor mass in the summer every year.

How can we turn around and deny anyone an outdoor wedding with any credibility?
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That outdoor Mass could be another extraordinary circumstance – if it’s really huge, then no church would have enough space for the entire congregation – not generally the situation for a wedding.
 
CarolAnnSFO said:
That outdoor Mass could be another extraordinary circumstance – if it’s really huge, then no church would have enough space for the entire congregation – not generally the situation for a wedding.
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I’m not talking about a papal mass with hundreds of thousands of people.

I’m talking about a thousand people that could fit in our diocessan cathedral.
 
The logic is to always give the best for God. So when you get married you should get married in the closest presence of God possible which is in front of the Eucharist, where we normally receive it, celebrate Mass and worship.

To do less is to seek our own personal freedom above giving the best to God.

Extraordinary circumstances do not make the rules
Of course it would be better to have a funeral inside with the body present. But in extraordinary circumstances rules are relaxed.

Baptisms should be done by a Priest, but in danger of death we can accommadate, that doesn’t make that the norm.

So the extraordinary circumstances are not what make the rules.

Ask the person if they normally drink urine, as people have done that to survive in extraordinary circumstances. That should shock them to see the reasoning behind doing what we should and what we can.

In Christ
Scylla
 
  1. weather risks
  2. bugs, insects, bird droppings
  3. holy water fonts?
I dont know. But, I am so happy to hear about your upcoming marriage!🙂
 
hmm, i dont know. I dont think there are technical reasons why u cant. I guess the whole ambiance is different, n i dont think a lot of people like to kneel in an open field wearing tuxedos or what ever. Plus it’s a big hassle to move and set up the altar outside no? (I’m thinking TLM type altar, then again if you wanted a traditional nuptial mass you’d probably be in a church anyways.)
 
In my wedding homily, I mention that it takes three for a successful marriage. Husband, wife, and God. And God comes first. I found these words from Fr. Frank Pavone of Priests for life: " That is why you are getting married before His altar, rather than at home or at your favorite place at the beach or the park.You make your vows before the altar of God, because you know that you can’t do this without him."

plato3
 
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