Positive Conversations with Other Catholics

[Tis_Bearself]

I appreciate that some Catholics are very worried about the state of the Church, stuff the Pope might do, the state of their respective countries politically, what laws might be passed, etc.

I also appreciate that some Catholics are deeply concerned about how the Mass is celebrated, how people dress for Mass, respect shown to the Eucharist, whether the music used is appropriate in view of past Vatican guidance, etc.

I further appreciate that Catholics are a large and diverse group and include subgroups other than Latin Rite Catholics, and that even within the Latin Rite there’s a diversity of private devotional practices, and many things are an individual choice such as whether or not to believe in apparitions and to what degree, etc.

And I appreciate that people want to express themselves on all these topics.

Likewise, I appreciate that the apologetics nature of this forum welcomes people of many religions and no religion, and that we don’t always agree on everything.

Having said that, is there a place for Catholics to discuss Catholic subjects with other Catholics and have the discussion be generally positive, rather than criticism, worry or complaints?

I seem to be unable to find such a place anywhere on the Internet, and not doing too much better in person.

I’m well aware of all the problems and issues but would rather not be hashing them out all day every day when life is stressful enough.

Is there a “Happy Catholic” place? Or do happy people just tend to not speak up because they’re busy being happy?

 

[oxford]

I think, with the nature of the internet, your best bet for that environment is probably outside of the internet at your church.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

Thanks, I do chat with people at a couple of the churches I attend regularly.
It’s not a very large group though and often we are gathered for some activity other than just chatting, such as a prayer group, or an activity, so the focus is on that.

I’ve been looking around the internet trying to find the type of group where one could just check in during the day, and there are one or two Facebook pages or groups led by someone selling products or services where things are fairly upbeat, but any kind of discussion group seems to have a huge proportion of negativity in it. Some days I can handle that and other days not so much. Many of them also have an extreme skew either to very traditional or very modernist, without much of anything for people in the middle.

 

[0Scarlett_nidiyilii]

I think your last paragraph

 

[oxford]

I get you, and I think your best bet would be some small Facebook group or something of the sort.

 

[Genesis315]

In real life you can be more personal and share those personal joys, etc. Since the internet is less personal (unless you’re a bare all on social media type person), the focus is going to be more on the big picture, which is and has been since Adam sinned, the valley of tears.

 

[steph03]

Well, it’s up to the positive Catholics to speak up. It’s so easy to complain, to knit pick… to be negative, to see the faults in others… it’s almost human nature.

So from this post on I will do my best to be caring, loving, show Christ’s love in the fullness of the Catholic faith. Thanks for the wake up call.

 

[JoeShlabotnik]

Those people who have a negative personality seem to have taken over out society. They seem to exist to try to cause trouble or to try to pick a fight with others. I pity them. But I do pray for them.
Thanks for your positiveness and keep being that kind of Catholic!!!

 

[Tis_Bearself]

I don’t want to put Catholics who have a concern in the basket of “negative personality”. If they’re genuinely concerned about the Church it may be out of love, or because they converted from a different church and don’t want to see the same things happening in the Catholic church that happened in the church they just left.

It can be disconcerting though when most discussions seem to take a turn for the negative. I feel like I can’t really bring up anything I like in Catholicism because somebody else will have something negative to say about it, whether it’s devotions, music, dress, Mother Mary, the priest’s homily topic, etc.

 

[steph03]

Don’t ever forget Saint Padre Pio’s motto… “Pray, hope, and don’t worry”.

 

[Thomas_Valle]

I just joined the forum, and I share your sentiments!

 

[1Lord1Faith]

Or do happy people just tend to not speak up because they’re busy being happy?

I think that’s one way to put it. I also think that a book could be written on why there don’t seem to be very many well adjusted people on the internet. I’m better it’s more of an ‘oil mixing with water’ problem. Wherever there are negative people, the positive people are going to leave.

I honestly don’t think that what you’re looking for can be found online. I think it’s just the nature of media (especially the social media) and those people who follow the media.

In my experience, the people who consume to much media are the ones who are quick to be the Debbie Downer in the conversation. I think the media is just toxic today.

 

[FossilResin]

Well, it’s up to the positive Catholics to speak up. It’s so easy to complain, to knit pick… to be negative, to see the faults in others… it’s almost human nature.

So from this post on I will do my best to be caring, loving, show Christ’s love in the fullness of the Catholic faith. Thanks for the wake up call.

 

[Beryllos]

There is a bit of the Us vs. Them mentality here at CAF, along with the corollary that if you are not one of Us, you must be one of Them.

Of course, that’s not just CAF. We see that elsewhere as well.

 

[jack63]

I’ve found a great deal of joy with “in person” Catholic groups, Bible study groups, social groups, family gatherings based upon a Catholic mass, and Catholic volunteer work.

I’ve also found “in person” experiences that upset and perplexed me. I’ve also realized that sometimes, as a convert, I have no idea what is going on in some situations. These type experiences are what why I’m here more so than a search for fellowship. I tend to look for “in person” experiences for fellowship. However, if I was happy with my spiritual life, I probably wouldn’t have started to post here.

As for trying to find a happier place on the Internet for Catholics, I’ve never tried to find that. Even the regular’s lounge discusses the controversy in the forums general. I’ll have to think about your questions more…

 

[ez3714]

It’s so easy to complain, to knit pick

or nit pick?

 

[Bluebright]

I dont think the internet ever has happy chats in any ‘group’ of people… not to sound cynical but the anonymity of it makes for people to lose there manners it seems to me. Unless perhaps they know each other already and are chatting then perhaps but even then.

I’d also suggest your local church but you say you haven’t had much luck there as you are just gathered for any activity such as a prayer group. Well how about taking the initiative. All my friends and social life is from such things, prayer groups, volunteering and cleaning the church etc. Someone asked someone to go for a coffee, or for lunch or little things, we stayed talking for a while doing the dishes. It’s usually the chatter while we are cleaning up afterwards or as I don’t have a car someone gives me a lift home to save me getting the bus and then some time later we end up having coffee. I do live in a city though so grabbing a coffee after mass is pretty easy. So why don’t you suggest it? I know it can be difficult. Hows your priest on organising social events in your parish hall? like film shows etc. we have seen some lovely films (Risen etc.) and Christmas is coming up so nativity movies are great with mince pies and mulled wine, lovely. It’s worth an ask. Volunteering is also a good way to meet people, may not necessarily only Catholics though but if you pick something through your church then you will likely have a good few Catholics and you often get to chat in between.

 

[Irishmom2]

Bear, I think you should change the title to “The Happy Catholic Place, No Whining Allowed.”

 

[steph03]

steph03:

It’s so easy to complain, to knit pick

or nit pick?

I stand corrected! or nit picked

 

[Tis_Bearself]

The lounge, during the short periods of time that I’ve managed to be in it because I always get flagged on the main forum and thrown out of the lounge pretty quickly, seems to be the closest thing to a friendly, positive group on here. Unfortunately, I’m usually not allowed in there and when I am, I’m loathe to start any discussions. I used to enjoy several threads in there but it’s hard to enjoy something when you know it’s just going to be a matter of days until you’re probably thrown out again. Before anyone says “just behave on the forum and you won’t be thrown out”, I’m subject to the same amount of seemingly arbitrary and perplexing flagging that everyone else complains about, I just choose to not complain about it on the forum because it’s pointless/ fruitless to do so.