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WoundedIcon
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If anyone has been following the saga of WoundedIcon – how appropriate the name in retrospect – you’ll know that I utterly fell apart this past year. Now I believe I have a name for what happened to me. It’s called tardive dysphoria, and it happens when a brain over-adapts to antidepressant meds and, when they stop being effective, it causes chronic treatment-resistant depression. I’ve been through a terrifying ordeal of having my Paxil completely fail on me and I felt like – as another person put it online – I was being “tortured in hell, tired all the time, unable to think or reason.” Please, pray for my healing or at least my graceful acceptance of this cross. I’ve started on new antidepressants, but I’m nearly up to the maximum dosage and still am very banged up. They work, sure, but it ain’t called treatment-resistant for nothing. I have a feeling no one is gonna listen to another self-diagnosis at my behavioral health care facility however, so I’m not sure what to do about this. And of course, these new meds will fail one day too (practically all long term use of SSRIs does) and after that only God knows how bad I’ll be. I kind of feel like I’ve got a death sentence here.
