Prayer as a path closer to God

[scapularkid8]

I have struggled with prayer in the past and recently it seems. I look for God, or at least try to. I want Him to be close to me. I feel something in my soul reaching out for the Peace and Love I know He can offer to my soul, and dearly wants to more than I can imagine, but I can’t find it.

I have always seen prayer as a journey closer to God, even since a young age. Granted, I was in the “I want an A on the Math test” prayer phase, but I quickly moved past that seeing prayer as a way for me to grow closer to God.

My struggle: I don’t feel or often see the effects of prayer, and so I sometimes enter phases (like now) where I avoid prayer because I just don’t see it as necessary. I know this is completely incorrect, because my soul needs oxygen too, but I don’t see the fruits of my prayer, and so I feel it does nothing.

In my human condition I know that I can’t always see God’s Will for me or my prayers, but I’m at a Catch22 because I can’t move forward in prayer. I’m stuck because of myself. I don’t know where to move from here.

 

[KennethD]

Keep praying out of love of God, and your prayers will be all the more meritorious because of your spiritual troubles. Oftentimes, God tries those who love Him by removing His consolations and hiding His presence for some time. If you have not read The Imitation of Christ, then you ought to, for the author speaks often of how in the spiritual life, consolations are often withdrawn in order test and purify those who desire to be devout. Love Jesus for his own sake, and not for any consolations or devout feelings (as good as they are in themselves).

 

[beckycmarie]

Scapularkid,

God often gives us a flood of good feelings (consolations) early on to encourage us to continue seeking Him. But if we are to mature spiritually, we have to learn to seek God, and not the good feelings. The dryness teaches us how to do that.

Although it may feel that He is far away, as long as you are in a state of grace, you are closer to Him than ever. You are showing God that you truly love Him, and not just the consolations He gives.

 

[Paul2274]

Keep praying…yes. But, also don’t “try” too hard. I know sometimes I just go and sit with our Lord in our adoration chapel or sit in our other small chapel where the tabernacle is and just be silent. Say a small prayer, but then ask God to fill you. Just sit and let yourself be filled with His Grace. Keep praying and keep your eyes toward Him. He may be answering your prayers and you don’t see it or it may not be the answer YOU want.
His Will Be Done.

Paul