Prayer for Convalidation

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PolishK

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Hi all,
I am a Catholic waiting to receive a marriage convalidation since I married a Southern Baptist. During our sessions with my priest, we were presented with the paperwork where I promise to raise our (future) children Catholic. My husband disagreed with this and now I cannot sign the paper nor be in “good standing”. He said there isn’t much he really disagrees with in the Catholic faith, he just thinks denominations are trivial. He wants us, if we ever have children, to become part of a Church as a family and since the Catholic Church has a “process” of converting, he doesn’t care to join. He’s even suggested that maybe we look into other denominations and see if there is something we can both agree on!!
Not to mention, I was never confirmed as a child and was in the process of receiving my confirmation (after our convalidation was to be done). Now, I won’t be able to receive this sacrament and will further be unable to participate in the Eucharist.
I ask that you please pray for this situation and the faiths of my husband and I. He is a good Christian, we just have differing views on certain things. Please pray for God’s guidance during this time. Thank you and God bless.
 
Memorare (Prayer to Our Lady)
Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to your protection, implored your help, or sought your intercession, was left unaided.
Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto you, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother. To you do I come, before you I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in your mercy, hear and answer me. Amen
 
PolishK said:
Hi all,
INot to mention, I was never confirmed as a child and was in the process of receiving my confirmation (after our convalidation was to be done). Now, I won’t be able to receive this sacrament and will further be unable to participate in the Eucharist.
I .
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we will certainly be praying for you and your family, but this is not necessarily true. Please sit down and talk to the priest who is preparing you and explain the entire situation. Invite (but do not demand) your husband to have a private conversation with the priest which may ease his own fears about what he, and you, will be required to do, say or promise.
 
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women and
blessed is the Fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners
now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
 
Praying that you remain faithful to the Church and to your baptismal promises. May no person ever separate you from your Catholic calling and duties. May you be faithful to bringing up your children Catholic, like God is expecting from you. Don’t go to hell for anybody; be docile to the Holy Spirit, who speaks through the Catholic Church. I pray you do the right thing and live the life of a faithful Catholic. Maybe you even have to leave this relationship, if your partner is already going back on what was agreed upon with the Catholic Church - your marriage wouldn’t be valid anymore if your partner goes back on his word to the Chrurch, right?
 
Memorare (Prayer to Our Lady)
Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to your protection, implored your help, or sought your intercession, was left unaided.
Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto you, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother. To you do I come, before you I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in your mercy, hear and answer me. Amen
 
I pray that you will have a private talk with this priest, or check with your diocise about this.

When I went through precana years ago, the priest did not make me sign anything like that. He did ask that we as a couple bring the children up together as “something”. And yes this was a priest.

I pray that discussions can continue. I may ruffle come feathers of other posters but it is a very self centered view for one religion to insist that children be raised in that religion over another. The Baptists could make the same pronouncements with no middle ground for a couple that wants to marry and build a life together.

I pray that your husband to be sees that there is no (wha?) process of conversion that the RC does…

I pray for clarity and compromise for all, Amen
 
I will pray for you in your painful dilemma

Canon Law: Can. 1125

1/ the Catholic party is to declare that he or she is prepared to remove dangers of defecting from the faith and is to make a sincere promise to do all in his or her power so that all offspring are baptized and brought up in the Catholic Church;

2/ the other party is to be informed at an appropriate time about the promises which the Catholic party is to make, in such a way that it is certain that he or she is truly aware of the promise and obligation of the Catholic party;

vatican.va/archive/ENG1104/__P41.HTM

From the Catechism of the Catholic Church

Mixed marriages and disparity of cult

1634… But the difficulties of mixed marriages must not be underestimated. They arise from the fact that the separation of Christians has not yet been overcome. The spouses risk experiencing the tragedy of Christian disunity even in the heart of their own home. Disparity of cult can further aggravate these difficulties. Differences about faith and the very notion of marriage, but also different religious mentalities, can become sources of tension in marriage, especially as regards the education of children. The temptation to religious indifference can then arise.

1635 According to the law in force in the Latin Church, a mixed marriage needs for liceity the express permission of ecclesiastical authority.135 In case of disparity of cult an express dispensation from this impediment is required for the validity of the marriage.136 This permission or dispensation presupposes that both parties know and do not exclude the essential ends and properties of marriage; and furthermore that the Catholic party confirms the obligations, which have been made known to the non-Catholic party, of preserving his or her own faith and ensuring the baptism and education of the children in the Catholic Church.137

vatican.va/archive/catechism/p2s2c3a7.htm
 
This exact thing happened with my husband and I. I honestly let it go for nearly six months. I tried to just go to the Baptist church and really gave an honest effort. When I knew that I want to embrace my Catholic faith, not only for myself but also my child, I didn’t go to him. I started praying and fasting every day. I strove to be the best wife and mother I could be. All of a sudden one day, my husband was overcome with love for me and was singing my praises. I felt God nudging me to broach the subject again. He said “Yes.”

Our son will be baptized in the Catholic church next month and our marriage will be con validated.

PRAY!
 
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women and
blessed is the Fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners
now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
 
Memorare (Prayer to Our Lady)
Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to your protection, implored your help, or sought your intercession, was left unaided.
Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto you, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother. To you do I come, before you I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in your mercy, hear and answer me. Amen
 
ready said:
Praying that you remain faithful to the Church and to your baptismal promises. May no person ever separate you from your Catholic calling and duties. May you be faithful to bringing up your children Catholic, like God is expecting from you. Don’t go to hell for anybody; be docile to the Holy Spirit, who speaks through the Catholic Church. I pray you do the right thing and live the life of a faithful Catholic. Maybe you even have to leave this relationship, if your partner is already going back on what was agreed upon with the Catholic Church - your marriage wouldn’t be valid anymore if your partner goes back on his word to the Chrurch, right?
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With all due respect, I am not going to leave my husband because of this. That would be breaking a vow that we took before God. I love my husband and do not believe that I am going to hell because of him…hah, that’s just silly to say so.
We were not married in the Catholic Church; my husband gave no word to the Church. We were married in the Southern Baptist.
 
atara said:
This exact thing happened with my husband and I. I honestly let it go for nearly six months. I tried to just go to the Baptist church and really gave an honest effort. When I knew that I want to embrace my Catholic faith, not only for myself but also my child, I didn’t go to him. I started praying and fasting every day. I strove to be the best wife and mother I could be. All of a sudden one day, my husband was overcome with love for me and was singing my praises. I felt God nudging me to broach the subject again. He said “Yes.”

Our son will be baptized in the Catholic church next month and our marriage will be con validated.

PRAY!
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Thank you for your story, atara! That’s really inspiring. I am going to keep praying and pray some more for whatever God wants to do with us! 😛

Also, TO CLARIFY - since many posters seem to be confused - WE ARE ALREADY MARRIED. We’ve been married for almost two years…maybe I didn’t make that clear in the initial post. Therefore, “leaving my significant other” is absolutely out of the question, but thank you for your prayers!! My husband has never taken any vows in the Catholic Church and only attends mass because I go. In the past few years, we have both been looking for a Church. Then about 6 months ago, I decided to return to the Catholic Church and he was okay with it. His family, of course, started giving him 100 questions about me and why I am Catholic, etc., but he still supported my decision. Now, after knowing that I have to sign this paper, he feels uncomfortable with it because he is not Catholic.

Also, as I’m typing this I don’t remember who posted this - but the Catholic Church DOES require children to be baptized and raised CATHOLIC CHRISTIANS, not just any Christian. It’s the same in most religions…Jews, Hindus, Muslims, etc. all have similar requirements.

Thank you to everyone who is praying…I just wanted to clear things up.
 
PolishK said:
With all due respect, I am not going to leave my husband because of this. That would be breaking a vow that we took before God. I love my husband and do not believe that I am going to hell because of him…hah, that’s just silly to say so.
We were not married in the Catholic Church; my husband gave no word to the Church. We were married in the Southern Baptist.
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I made the mistake of thinking you were married in the Catholic Church. Sorry. I’ll pray for you and your husband and hope that nothing gets in the way of your becoming a Catholic. Persevere!🙂
 
ready said:
I made the mistake of thinking you were married in the Catholic Church. Sorry. I’ll pray for you and your husband and hope that nothing gets in the way of your becoming a Catholic. Persevere!🙂
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Thank you! I’m actually a born and raised Catholic. I just started bouncing around churches in my early twenties so when my husband and I got together 5 years ago I wasn’t a “practicing-Catholic”. Now that I want to come back to the Church, we have to go through the marriage convalidation process…and this is where we are stuck! 😛

Your prayers are appreciated!..Thank you!
 
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