Prayer life slow

[scapularkid8]

I just can’t “connect” like I’ve been able to in the past. I don’t know what to say, and I just feel like I’m repeating myself. The Scriptures are really my main interest lately. I love studying the Word and applying it, but I have trouble now during spontaneous prayer. Do I need to listen more instead of talking to God? What’s wrong?

 

[Rawb]

I had a problem like this once, not that long ago. It felt like I was dry, really disconnected from God. While I was going through this I was looking at a website and this girl had told her story about when she went through something just like this. After she got through it she realized God had been calling her up a level, calling her to mature a little in her relationship (and maturing doesn’t necessarily mean to just get more serious). In my case, I learned the benefit of silence before God, listening and meditating. It may be God wants you to do the same. I would sit with the window open and feel a breeze and hear the world outside. It helped me to connect with God, thinking that though I’m in here listening, the world out there is still part of his plan and glory.

You may also try reading saint’s biographies, or study more about the Eucharist (because that is God being extremely close to us in the physical world). Try maybe to connect with someone else who is trying to develop a deep prayer life, because relationships based on Christ will bring us closer to God. Maybe even go to a park and just watch people and realize each one is one of God’s creatures.

The thing is nobody will be able to tell you “Do A, B, and C and that will fix it.” Our relationship with God is one of our most intense and personal. But at the same time to ‘fix’ a prayer life doesn’t necessarily mean “pray more to get through it”. You may need to take a step back and try to see the world through God’s eyes, or realize you’re trying to force feelings (remeber that feelings aren’t the judge of how good a prayer is as well). My advice though would be to listen a bit more. Not to sit and strain to hear a voice, but just to sit and realize who God is. Think about what he’s done. You could even read a scripture passage and think about it, what God has done in it and what it means for you.

LoL, long post. I’ll keep you in my prayers tonight though. God bless.

 

[Eileen_T]

Rawb:

You could even read a scripture passage and think about it, what God has done in it and what it means for you.

I endorse this.

 

[puzzleannie]

I just can’t “connect” like I’ve been able to in the past. I don’t know what to say, and I just feel like I’m repeating myself. The Scriptures are really my main interest lately. I love studying the Word and applying it, but I have trouble now during spontaneous prayer. Do I need to listen more instead of talking to God? What’s wrong?

if you personally are not drawn to spontaneous prayer then don’t force it. If you are being led to spend more time with scripture, that is an ancient prayer practice of the Church - lectio divina - so continue doing what you are doing. what usually arises after spending time with a given scripture passage is that something very brief arises and expresses itself as prayer, even more of a feeling than a verbalization, and that is enough. Not necessary to fill pages and pages in your journal, or to express a long extended prayer. you do have a good instinct of listening more, that is, spending time in silent waiting after you have spent your time with the scripture. that is very valid, and it would be wrong to try and fill that time with forced verbalized prayer, you are quite right to listen more.

 

[scapularkid8]

Exactly how am I supposed to listen? It sounds like such a basic and even dumb question, but what am I supposed to be listening for? Will God’s voice be like a personal revelation or something weird like that? I need some guidance.

 

[puzzleannie]

Exactly how am I supposed to listen? It sounds like such a basic and even dumb question, but what am I supposed to be listening for? Will God’s voice be like a personal revelation or something weird like that? I need some guidance.

simply sit in silence for a while after your loth, rosary, scripture reading or whatever you have been doing. the silence is essential, no music, cell phone off. Even if you can only get 5 minutes, fight for it. the hearing is done internally, not audibly, in the heart, not in the intellect, and you quite often will not be sensible of anything “happening”. Just give the Lord the silence and leave the rest to Him. do not have any expectations or disappointments. He does the work, you rest in silence.

that you are aware of a real change in how you are praying and your needs in prayer is a sign it is time to seek spiritual direction. plenty of threads here on that topic

 

[paulah]

sk8 - Im so glad to see that Im not the only one struggling. I havent ‘connected’ in a very long time - and boy, do I miss it.

The above posters are right - the silence thing is the secret. I love what Rawb said about sitting with the window open and feeling the breeze. Beautiful.

 

[Polish]

Dear Scapularkid8, I think we can all relate to what you are going through - it’s all part of life. There are always peaks and valleys in every relationship and our personal relationship with God is no different.

I’ve found that prayers need not always be one-sided with our asking for something. There are also times when God choses not to speak to my soul. So, in these times, I sit and look at God and He at me - I’m not picturing Him, only allowing His presence to be made aware to my soul. There are no words spoken, only gazing in love.

Reading the scriptures slowly will reveal an understanding that always surprises me. Often times I’ve wondered how I ever missed a certain passage before when I seems to shout off the page this time.

Dryness is part of our progression to God. Just don’t give up Scapularkid8. It’s often hard to learn when you don’t know what you’re learning. But be calm, God is the teacher. Thank God always in all things.

I’ll put you in my prayers.

 

[Melanie01]

Are you able to attend a retreat?

Love without words…

Perservere…pray for help…

 

[blessedstar]

I just can’t “connect” like I’ve been able to in the past. I don’t know what to say, and I just feel like I’m repeating myself. The Scriptures are really my main interest lately. I love studying the Word and applying it, but I have trouble now during spontaneous prayer. Do I need to listen more instead of talking to God? What’s wrong?

Nothing is wrong, Jesus is leading you in His own ways. The prayer life is dynamic that is true, but it peaks and troughs. God is reminding you that you cannot pray unless He gifts it to you. He is reminding you that you need to experience His apparent absence in order to truly appreciate His presence. As you know by now, God is never absent from us, not even for a milli-second (is that a word? ) You first dwelled in the mind of God and from your conception in the womb God has dwelled with you and at your Baptism you entered into the Divine life God has called you to live in Him and He in you and also at Confirmation.

You must learn to trust God, that His hand is deeply upon you and He is within you even if you are not able to sense that nor able to perceive Him nor able to utter words to Him. If you do this these times of apparent dryness will be fruitful to you, you know God is in the desert as much as He is in the oasis.

You must also remember that God does not need your words, it adds nothing to Him, He does not need your praise, yet He gifts it to us, that is the ability to pray and praise and love Him. He does this for our good and the good of heaven because it is to our good to thank and praise Him. How great it is then to thank Him in the desert as well as in the oasis, how great it is to thank Him in trail and suffering as well as in times of rest from trial and suffering. You know that this is true love and God is calling you to truly love, to be truly Christ-like.

Let your dryness be your prayer, offer this spiritual suffering united to Jesus’ sufferings for someone you love and if you can offer no other words to God simply kneel before Him in His True Presence in the Tabernacle and say the words ‘Thank you’ and love Him silently in your heart. You must not give up prayer.

Remember that your desire for Jesus is because He desires you, whilever you desire Him you are answering that call, you have nothing to worry about.

Allow the Lord’s will to preside over you being docile to His work within you (you know it is only when we struggle against it that it becomes painful), let Him lead you with full trust in Him becoming forgetful of your ‘self’, you may often not understand and wonder what is happening to you, but you will not get lost, nor ever need to be afraid, not if you follow Jesus along that narrow road that leads to Calvary because this is the path to true peace in Christ; a deep interior peace, that is the Lord Himself, that the world cannot provide nor take away.

I suspect the Saints would gladly travel this arduous path a thousand times because they know what is at the end of it.

In my prayers to the Holy Spirit

 

[puzzleannie]

once again, St Francis de Sales, the master of spiritual direction, comes through with help on perseverence in prayer in times of dryness, quoting his words from Fr Hardons prayerbook:

Works done with repugnance can be most meritorious
If certain persons do something with repugnance and weariness, they feel that they have not gained any merit. On the contrary, they have gained greater merit, for a single ounce of good performed with weariness and without satisfaction while the soul is undergoing a period of spiritual darkness is worth more than one hundred pounds of good done with pleasure and satisfaction, because the first was performed with a stronger and purer love than the latter. (Spiritual Diary)

Aridity can be an occasion of merit
When a man embraces what is good, though he have not feeling nor sensible relish in the matter, he will please God and merit heaven, especially as God is more ready to reward than to punish. Nay, oftentimes these acts are more meritorious and pleasing to God when they are done in dryness without taste of sensible consolation, beause they are purer and stronger and more lasting, and a man puts more of his own into them than when is carried off his feet by devotion (Rodriguez, Practice of perfection and Christian virtue)

In what merit consists
Our Lord said this to me one day: Thinkest thou my daughter, that meriting lies in fruition? No. merit lies only in doing, in suffering and in loving.
Life of St. Teresa of Jesus written by herself

 

[Em_in_FL]

Exactly how am I supposed to listen? It sounds like such a basic and even dumb question, but what am I supposed to be listening for? Will God’s voice be like a personal revelation or something weird like that? I need some guidance.

Ahhh the season of dryness… I’m familiar with this too!
Remember… how can you enjoy the times of overflowing springs of prayer if you haven’t been through the desert?
Do not force it. This can often lead to numbness and repetition and eventually annoyance to the prayers. Just enjoy the silence of your heart.
Ask God to lead you to where He wants you to be.
Ask God for the perseverance to make it through this dry season so that one day soon you can enjoy the overflowing spring of prayer again.

This is very very common… not something to fear!
God bless!

 

[baltobetsy]

I just read a really good book that addresses the problem of thinking oneself unable to pray. It’s called Time For God, and you can buy it here:sinagtala.com/single_spirituality_time_for_god.htm

Betsy

 

[Della]

I just wanted to add, that as an old campaigner I have found that I need to frame my day with some version of Morning and Evening Prayer. It may seem like an odd thing to recommend for enhancing spontaneous prayer, but it is like the difference between always eating desserts and having a solid meal 2 or 3 times a day. Those solid meals make it possible to enjoy the dessert. God may be calling you to pray the Prayer of the Church, to join in with millions of people around the world in offering God the praises of the Church at least twice a day. Try it and see if it doesn’t make a difference.

 

[scapularkid8]

I pray the LOTH Night Prayer usually, but I’ll try the two, Morning and Evening as you suggested.

Guys, I’m scared. I don’t know where He is going to lead me adn that scares me. I’m afaraid it’ll be something I don’t want. It’s hard to explain, but I have this intuition-type of thing that’s telling me that once I begin the new path I’m being shown, I won’t be the same and I don’t like change. The verse that comes to mind is “…for God is not like man and wishes to change His mind…”. I don’t know what to do.

 

[puzzleannie]

I Guys, I’m scared. I don’t know where He is going to lead me adn that scares me. .

now you’re really talking – I think that really is our fundamental problem with prayer, we just keep talking faster and louder so we won’t hear what He is trying to tell us, because we can’t take the stress. boy do I know this feeling.

 

[Della]

I pray the LOTH Night Prayer usually, but I’ll try the two, Morning and Evening as you suggested.

If you find the longer versions hard to use or uncongenial, try a shorter version for lay people. You’re more likely to stick to it if you don’t make it too complicated for yourself.

Guys, I’m scared. I don’t know where He is going to lead me adn that scares me. I’m afaraid it’ll be something I don’t want. It’s hard to explain, but I have this intuition-type of thing that’s telling me that once I begin the new path I’m being shown, I won’t be the same and I don’t like change. The verse that comes to mind is “…for God is not like man and wishes to change His mind…”. I don’t know what to do.

When we are young and when we are old we fear change, it’s true. But really, life is full of changes–we’re not always aware of them, but we go through them all the time whether we recognize it or not. Don’t try to look too far ahead. For now take each day as it comes and rest your mind and heart in God’s love. No matter where he might lead you, it will be good for your soul and advance his will, and that’s all that really matters when all is said and done. I will pray for you, please say a prayer for me, too!

 

[blessedstar]

Della is right.

You must remember God never does to a soul a violence. God is Love. He will not enforce anything upon you, you must accept. All of God’s work in you is good and for your good and for the good of the entire Christian family and for the good of heaven and of the world. Wow! That’s something to consider isn’t it? We are all poorer without you and all the richer because of you. I thank God for you and for every one of my brothers and sisters, we are all richer because of each other.

Have a little courage to walk the walk after doing the talk. Jesus knows your heart and knows when it is ready for each tiny step in the interior spiritual journey, Jesus Himself prayed ‘My heart is ready’ during His Passion. God will never do a violence to your spirit, He is the Good Shepherd who is gentle and humble, a great King who stoops down and serves His servants. Jesus desires for you to dwell in Him in His peace and you must have the courage to enter into it.

God is granting you great gifts, graces and favours and like our Blessed Virgin Mother Mary we have to choose to offer our fiat, our yes.

Tell Jesus you are afraid, tell Him you are worried where this will lead you and you are afraid of changing and of changes and ask Him to console your heart and to give you courage. I can assure you you have nothing to be afraid of, but as for me telling you that that will do no good for you; you need to tell Jesus all these things and let Him show you you have nothing to be afraid of.

Your hands are nowhere near as safe as Jesus’ hands, your will feeble and inferior to Jesus’ will. Hand yourself over to Jesus entirely, you do not need to have your hands on the steering wheel of your life for your life to be successful, that is success in being Christ-like. When we trust Jesus our life is glorious and gives glory to His Name. You are struggling to trust, this is the issue and the whole issue, so pray to trust in God.

Continue to pray, pray however you can to keep your prayer life going and if the Divine Office is of help to you then pray it. Personally I have spent a long time struggling to pray the Divine Office during spiritual dryness but perseverance has paid off, it is rich and enriching. I figure that if something is hard to do it is always worth doing it!

Persevere in prayer, persevere in everything.
Thank God for the gift of prayer, thank God for the gift of your faith, thank God for everything.

Jesus’ way, Jesus’ path is the hardest path in the world to follow, but remember it is your safety, nothing is ever how it appears to be, the Gospel is a paradox. You know God has a great sense of humour and you must learn not to take your **‘self’ **so seriously. The ‘self’ is an unauthentic joke, it is an illusion of what humanity should be. Psychologists have spent time defining the ‘self’ and none have yet realised that it is an illusion, a lie a deception of what humanity is and should be, they have sought to define what is broken instead of what is whole. Let go of the ‘self’ and seek Christ the true ‘self’, you won’t go wrong.

We are called to change, we are all becoming, we are all transforming, we are always beginning, we are all to be Christ-like which is the true self of all men each man making up all the parts of the Body of Christ in their uniqueness.

In my prayers

 

[Em_in_FL]

Guys, I’m scared. I don’t know where He is going to lead me adn that scares me. I’m afaraid it’ll be something I don’t want. It’s hard to explain, but I have this intuition-type of thing that’s telling me that once I begin the new path I’m being shown, I won’t be the same and I don’t like change. The verse that comes to mind is “…for God is not like man and wishes to change His mind…”. I don’t know what to do.

God doesn’t force anything on you… nothing at all… it’s ALL your own free will.
He wants you to be happy and know only love. Following God doesn’t mean you won’t be the same… you’ll always be yourself… a unique soul that God is in love with!

 

[scapularkid8]

You are struggling to trust, this is the issue and the whole issue, so pray to trust in God.

I’ve always been one not to trust. From infomercials to magic tricks I’ve always been skeptical and unfortunately, that part of my personality comes into my spiritual life and it’s not helping! Couple that with my recurring episodes of Scrupulocity (which are because of my hesitation to trust in God’s Mercy!) and you’ve got one worried Catholic.