Prayer Question

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This question has been on my mind alot lately: why does it seem that no matter how much you believe, how many times or in what way you pray, or what you pray for, you never get it, and only in extremely rare, select instances are prayers actually answered, and even then the Church doesn’t require belief in them? For instance, praying for God to speak to you, or give any sign that He is there at all, or to help you or someone you pray for get through something emotionally, or for something bad to not happen to you, the prayers are never actually answered?
 
This question has been on my mind alot lately: why does it seem that no matter how much you believe, how many times or in what way you pray, or what you pray for, you never get it, and only in extremely rare, select instances are prayers actually answered, and even then the Church doesn’t require belief in them? For instance, praying for God to speak to you, or give any sign that He is there at all, or to help you or someone you pray for get through something emotionally, or for something bad to not happen to you, the prayers are never actually answered?
I guess it depends on what you pray for. How deep is your faith in God? God knows what you need , why you need it and when you need it. As for His talking to you, He does talk to you, but do you, or are you listening?

You are not alone in aking these questions. We all do. It’s just that God doesn’t jump and do what we want when we want it. We’re like impatient children who throw tantrums when we don’t get an answer. In many cases He just lets things take its natural course, good or bad, to show us that we can solve on our own many of our own problems and not keep
“running to mommy” on every occasion. But He is always there to pick us up if we fall down and skin our knee. “Lord I believe. Help me in my un-belief.” Shalom Chevarim.

PAX DOMINI :signofcross:

Shalom Aleichem
 
Well, I wouldn’t say I’m “throwing a tantrum” by wanting a relationship with my Father who is ever-silent. If God never did anything I asked him to do but talk to me occasionally, or give me even just one specific sign that he exists and was responsive, I would be fully satisfied. But I have prayed for that continuously for years and it has never happened. Hence my dilemma.
 
Well, I wouldn’t say I’m “throwing a tantrum” by wanting a relationship with my Father who is ever-silent. If God never did anything I asked him to do but talk to me occasionally, or give me even just one specific sign that he exists and was responsive, I would be fully satisfied. But I have prayed for that continuously for years and it has never happened. Hence my dilemma.
My friend, I understand your dilema. I am more or less in the same boat with you. I’m 83 and have prayed all my life and have yet to hear Him or get a direct answer. Yet, it does not deter me, for many times when I least expect it my prayers are answered. Not all of them, mind you, but the one(s) that He thinks that are necessary or important. I am
satisfied and feel greatly honored. So, please have patience, keep believing, and most of all, have faith. God Bless.

PAX DOMINI :signofcross:

Shalom Eleichem
 
Honestly, if my prayers were always about things that I want, like to win the lottery or find a girlfriend or get a job or something, and they weren’t always answered, it would be alot easier for me. But the main thing I ask of God is a personal relationship, or just one indication of his existence without me having to think it up myself.
 
Honestly, if my prayers were always about things that I want, like to win the lottery or find a girlfriend or get a job or something, and they weren’t always answered, it would be alot easier for me. But the main thing I ask of God is a personal relationship, or just one indication of his existence without me having to think it up myself.
Crikey… you sound like you have never really felt God in your presence. Maybe I’m just lucky? But seriously if we all said; God I don’t believe you are there but if you prove it I will believe - then surely that would destroy his grace and allowance of our free will. God is never obvious, he is easy to ignore if you want to! But if you are responsive to him then he is obvious in all ways. But remeber that God shows him self in such ways that we can always pretend it wasn’t him if we want to. This is really how he works because if he didn’t then we would be petrified of his appearence. He is with you, please don’t forget that. But always know that he doesn’t need to show his face to prove how much he loves you. I’m sorry if I’m not much help. I’ve known christ now for a year and a half ONLY! But I know him very well. I wish you would to. Ask him to bless what ever you do, travel, eating, walking, sleeping and always remember the cross. That is important.
He is talking to you - he is singing in your ear.
Even when you are suffering he is singing his amazing love into your soul. Stop searching and start hearing. He is SILENTLY singing his amazing love over you. Stop trying and start feeling.
 
There used to be a country song, “I Thank God for Unanswered Prayers”. If you have not heard it,you might look it up sometime.

I used to be like you. For years, God did not talk to me (or maybe I just did not hear). Then one day he did. It was neither comfortable nor pleasant. I usually describe it as “God whacked me up side of the head”. Apparently, he had to use strong methods to get my attention and he did.

Did I enjoy it, NOT. Was is it worth it, definitely. Now I can hear Him when he whispers. Maybe I have learned. Be careful of what you wish for. I believe I finally understand the phrase “Fear God and dread naught.”
 
Honestly, if my prayers were always about things that I want, like to win the lottery or find a girlfriend or get a job or something, and they weren’t always answered, it would be alot easier for me. But the main thing I ask of God is a personal relationship, or just one indication of his existence without me having to think it up myself.
Really scameter the way you think you it would behoove you to read some Aquinas. The subjects of your threads are all questions he writes about in his summa. You really ought to delve into reading more of those types of things because the answers you are looking for are complex. There you would find more satisfaction in the answers you were given I assure you.
 
Folks who say they would like to ‘see’ some indication of God in ther lives really have not looked very hard.

Just look at all the miracles surrounding you. Your just happening to come from the simple union of two cell that grew to become billions of cells all working in harmony (for the most part) is a great miracle from God.

The fact that you are able to think and examine your own existence, the fact that your body does thousands of things automatically are all miracles of nature. Look at the complexity, details, and vastness of the universe and can you really say, you have no indication or evidence that He exists ?

Do you really need a booming voice out of the clouds to tell you that He is there and cares about you ? There’s no secret that we already know what He wants of us. Spend a few minutes in prayer, or reading scriptures and it’s quite obvious what He wants us to do. Read a little bit about the saints and that’s the road map on how we should lead our lives.

Folks who have personal revelations and direct contact are rare. BUT it does happen, you’ve probably read about them and not just in the Bible. The thing is, it usually happens for the most pious individuals, people who have rare faith and goodness. PLUS God usually asks or requires them to lead extradinarily holy lives.

Do you think you fall into that category or have the wherewithal to lead the type of lives that God requires of you ? If you do then just maybe God may choose to speak to you personally. If you haven’t noticed God usually asks great sacrifices from His personal messengers. Most end up devoting their entire lives to Him. It’s not easy being a living saint or prophet.

We are all called to be saints, but the vast majority of us don’t have the piety or have to suffer through what makes a great saint.
 
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scameter:
Well, I wouldn’t say I’m “throwing a tantrum” by wanting a relationship with my Father who is ever-silent. If God never did anything I asked him to do but talk to me occasionally, or give me even just one specific sign that he exists and was responsive, I would be fully satisfied. But I have prayed for that continuously for years and it has never happened. Hence my dilemma.
How is the life of holiness going?

It may sound ridiculous, but a prayer life is only as intimate as your relationship with God is. And sin is the number one roadblock to union with God. If you really want to be united with Him-- to “experience” Him-- then you’re going to need to go through serious purification. The Scriptures say, “taste and see the goodness of the Lord”-- and they’re not kidding.

Now, that is indeed the point of prayer and the sacraments. It’s what the Church has been given to us for.

Nevertheless, most of us go through the vast majority of our lives doing the same old thing, but never really targeting our sin at its roots-- never really pursuing the life of Christian perfection by rejecting venial sin and imperfection. We’re never going to enter into an intimate union with God as long as we willfully harbor sin, even small sins. As a result, most of us have lived our lives in a type of perpetual spiritual childhood, stunted because we are too selfish to give up our petty sins.

Fr. Thomas Dubay has a pretty accessible introduction to this sort of thing in his book, “Fire Within” which discusses the life of prayer/ the interior life (click on the link to read the beginning of the book). He also has another book called a prayer primer, “Deep Conversion/Deep Prayer” or something of the sort.

The good news, he tells us, is that the ordinary teaching of theologians is that since we are all called to the life of holiness/Christian perfection, we likewise have open to us the normative way of holiness, which is through infused contemplation.

The other thing to get down, other than the idea about the life of holiness, is what exactly prayer means. Many people think that prayer is more or less exclusively petitionary. And that’s certainly part of it. But the other parts include thanksgiving, adoration and confession. This is the sort of prayer when we don’t necessary ask for anything but we just spend time in His presence. For us beginners in prayer, this means typical meditative prayer, which comes in many different ways (lectio divina, the rosary… etc.). It’s only by regularly spending time in His transforming presence that we will become holier. It’s by staying faithfully in this sort of prayer that we begin to “know” Him.

I think you genuinely want to “know” God personally. You want nothing less than to be a contemplative. The cost, of course, is your entire self. When you think about it, it’s really a rather cheap price, no?

God bless,
Rob
 
Thanks to everyone for your gracious and insightful answers. 🙂

I have been contemplating this question, and many others, over the past couple days, and talking with my father and my RCIA leader about it, I came to an answer for my dilemma. My problem with prayer was that I wanted a personal relationship with God in a direct, audible and/or visible manner, because I believed that with Christianity being theistic, such a thing was required. But after thinking and studying it, I came to see that Christianity, while theistic, is also a religion of revelation; certain individuals receive revelation and everyone else then must choose to trust those people or not. For example, Jesus Himself wrote nothing; He merely told His apostles to go out and teach, giving their hearers the choice to trust them or not. Christianity is a religion of worshipping God, yes, but it is also a religion of loving people. And the most perfect way, suitable for a perfect God, to combine those two is to require people to trust and love one another to know anything about God. Christianity, and particularly Catholicism, is a religion of communal worship, not just each individual having their own personal, Gnostic relationship with God and ignoring the rest of humanity. And I think this is why most atheists I have ever met are very bitter and cynical: they couldn’t handle having to trust and love people to be Christian, so they chose the cynicism of atheism. I don’t want to live that way, so I choose Christianity.

While I think it’s important to have a communal faith, it’s also important to recognize God rationally in nature and to be holy, as those in this topic have said. And, furthermore, once one is baptized and confirmed, the Holy Spirit can speak personally to you, but even before that, actual grace and the conscience can give you, from my own experience, feelings. For instance, whenever I think or say God, Jesus or anything else to do with Christianity, I immediately get a feeling of (positive) anxiety and reverence at His Divinity. And also, I always feel negative when I have doubts or am leaning towards atheism, and feel very happy and full when I have faith. Christianity is not just a religion; it’s a spirituality. Not everyone can be mystical, i.e. receiving direct revelation from God. But all Catholics can have a spiritual life through the Holy Spirit.
 
Folks who say they would like to ‘see’ some indication of God in ther lives really have not looked very hard.

Just look at all the miracles surrounding you. Your just happening to come from the simple union of two cell that grew to become billions of cells all working in harmony (for the most part) is a great miracle from God.

The fact that you are able to think and examine your own existence, the fact that your body does thousands of things automatically are all miracles of nature. Look at the complexity, details, and vastness of the universe and can you really say, you have no indication or evidence that He exists ?

Do you really need a booming voice out of the clouds to tell you that He is there and cares about you ?
There’s no secret that we already know what He wants of us. Spend a few minutes in prayer, or reading scriptures and it’s quite obvious what He wants us to do. Read a little bit about the saints and that’s the road map on how we should lead our lives.

Folks who have personal revelations and direct contact are rare. BUT it does happen, you’ve probably read about them and not just in the Bible. The thing is, it usually happens for the most pious individuals, people who have rare faith and goodness.

Why not to those who need it ? 🤷

PLUS God usually asks or requires them to lead extradinarily holy lives.

He - according to the theory - gives them the means to do so: but does not gives these means to anybody else; most of us are left in the lurch, to fend for ourselves, while he pampers his favourites :rolleyes: Which is nice for them, granted; but pretty hard on us. Why are we, who are in such great need, left to fend for ourselves ?​

Do you think you fall into that category or have the wherewithal to lead the type of lives that God requires of you ?

If you do then just maybe God may choose to speak to you personally. If you haven’t noticed God usually asks great sacrifices from His personal messengers. Most end up devoting their entire lives to Him. It’s not easy being a living saint or prophet.

We are all called to be saints, but the vast majority of us don’t have the piety or have to suffer through what makes a great saint.

That last detail is one of the cruellest demands of all. It is grossly unrealistic - what on earth is the point of trying to be what one never could be in a billion years 🙂 ?​

Holiness AFAICS is something for which some people have a talent; much as some have a talent for drawing, or languages, or music, or sports, or whatever it may be. Some people are Leonardos or Michelangelos for being holy, others are second-raters: & some of us are nowhere, & know it. 🙂 Not everyone can be a Handel - some can’t play an instrument at all: it would be the height of cruelty & silliness to require those with no musical talent to play an instrument. Yet to require holiness of all Christians, does that, only more so 😦 To imagine one can be a Saint is sheer self-deception, & a recipe for despair. Mediocrity may not be very heroic, but it’s better to be mediocre & to do something useful with one’s life, than to soar too near the sun, come unstuck, & crash horribly. 🙂

God doesn’t answer prayer - not unless one is a very privileged person: an ecstatic, a visionary, a nun; that sort. Most of us have to make do with second-best. The fact is, prayer to the Tooth Fairy would be equally productive & useful. The real problem is that the doctrine of prayer encourages false hopes: & that is appallingly cruel :mad: The seemingly cast-iron promises in the Bible can always be “got round” - the result ? [edited]
 
God responds to my requests in the same way that my father would respond. My dad would do anything within his power to help me if he really believed that it would make me happy.

When you ask God for anything you must be certain that he will provide, and you must be feeling the happiness that you expect from receiving what you ask. God loves, love, and he will respond to love.

Pray bigger…
 
GofG,

God may not appear or speak directly to everyone who needs it, but He has His own way of helping them. It is said that God does not give anyone more than what they can handle.

We each have a guardian angel to help us out. With a little bit of faith we can do anything. No one is left entirely to their own devices. We have tools available we just don’t know how or are not willing to use them. Some times we have both the ability and potential to help ourselves, but for whatever reason, we don’t anything with them.

We are all called to holiness, not everyone can be a living saint but Heaven is within the grasp of all. Maybe your disappointments and suffering are a part of your learning process.

If you read about the lives of the saints they were hardly pampered. Most suffered greatly and sometimes driven to the edge of dispair.

Even the great saints did not have all of their prayers answered. Sometimes it is not in God’s plan for whatever reason. Maybe we are asked to do without. maybe we are to learn how to deal with our disappointments or failures.
 

Why not to those who need it ? 🤷

He - according to the theory - gives them the means to do so: but does not gives these means to anybody else; most of us are left in the lurch, to fend for ourselves, while he pampers his favourites :rolleyes: Which is nice for them, granted; but pretty hard on us. Why are we, who are in such great need, left to fend for ourselves ?​

That last detail is one of the cruellest demands of all. It is grossly unrealistic - what on earth is the point of trying to be what one never could be in a billion years 🙂 ?​

Holiness AFAICS is something for which some people have a talent; much as some have a talent for drawing, or languages, or music, or sports, or whatever it may be. Some people are Leonardos or Michelangelos for being holy, others are second-raters: & some of us are nowhere, & know it. 🙂 Not everyone can be a Handel - some can’t play an instrument at all: it would be the height of cruelty & silliness to require those with no musical talent to play an instrument. Yet to require holiness of all Christians, does that, only more so 😦 To imagine one can be a Saint is sheer self-deception, & a recipe for despair. Mediocrity may not be very heroic, but it’s better to be mediocre & to do something useful with one’s life, than to soar too near the sun, come unstuck, & crash horribly. 🙂

God doesn’t answer prayer - not unless one is a very privileged person: an ecstatic, a visionary, a nun; that sort. Most of us have to make do with second-best. The fact is, prayer to the Tooth Fairy would be equally productive & useful. The real problem is that the doctrine of prayer encourages false hopes: & that is appallingly cruel :mad: The seemingly cast-iron promises in the Bible can always be “got round” - the result ? God obviously does not mean what he says - & that means he is the greatest snake-oil salesman & deceiver of all. 😦 That is wicked, or nothing is.
I see you’ve really become “gutted”. God does NOT pick and chose, it’s we who do so.
You act like son who only turns to his father when he needs some money to fix his car or go out on a date, and so on otherwise his father is just an ornament around the house.

God answers prayers that are necessary for your own good. You can’t go around asking Him to let you win the lottery, for then He really has to pick a favorite and that is something He DOES NOT do ! For Him to answer your prayers you have to be sincere in faith, worship, and love of him. Those whose prayers are answered meet those requirements. Just praying for favors insincerely is to no avail. Have faith, worship Him truly, and love Him with all your heart and everyone of your prayers will be answered.
God Bless.

PAX DOMINI

Shalom Aleichem
 
Gottle of Geer, SAID THIS - "God doesn’t answer prayer - not unless one is a very privileged person: an ecstatic, a visionary, a nun; that sort. Most of us have to make do with second-best. The fact is, prayer to the Tooth Fairy would be equally productive & useful. The real problem is that the doctrine of prayer encourages false hopes: & that is appallingly cruel :mad: The seemingly cast-iron promises in the Bible can always be “got round” - the result ? [edited].

!!! :eek: !!! Wow, you call your self catholic even though you say things like these!
I have heard more sane statements from agnostics!
 
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