Prayer regarding Vocation

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Hello, feel pressured to become a consecrated virgin, but don’t want to.

It is hard not to want to accumulate merit for paradise, but life seems without purpose if you are living it for others and not for yourself while others are obviously not living their life for you. Prayers would be helpful. 🙂
 
Why do you feel pressured to do so? It’s impossible to undertake vows or promises for any vocation if it’s being done under pressure; one must freely commit to the vocation he’s being called to.

As for the second part, sacrifice is about giving fully and completely of oneself unreservedly and unconditionally, not expecting anything in return. It’s not always easy (in fact, it’s rarely easy). But we cannot let the selfishness of others harden us against a life of loving sacrifice. Look to the Cross.

-ACEGC
 
Hello, feel pressured to become a consecrated virgin, but don’t want to.

It is hard not to want to accumulate merit for paradise, but life seems without purpose if you are living it for others and not for yourself while others are obviously not living their life for you. Prayers would be helpful. 🙂
I pray for you. May God guide you in your discernment of His plans for you. May He lead you to people, friends, family, and loved ones who can help you find out the best path for you. And may the Lord let you know in ways you understand His wonderful plans for your future. AMEN.
 
Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death.
Amen
 
Why do you feel pressured to do so? It’s impossible to undertake vows or promises for any vocation if it’s being done under pressure; one must freely commit to the vocation he’s being called to.

As for the second part, sacrifice is about giving fully and completely of oneself unreservedly and unconditionally, not expecting anything in return. It’s not always easy (in fact, it’s rarely easy). But we cannot let the selfishness of others harden us against a life of loving sacrifice. Look to the Cross.

-ACEGC
Feel pressure both from myself and from others. Pressure from myself comes from perfectionism. Want to be a virgin dedicated to God because it is a higher state than marriage, and to earn as much merit from heaven as possible for eternal reward. With only one life, it seems it should be used for God. Perhaps this is scrupulosity?

From others b/c several priests and a nun have recommended that I become a nun. Used to have an Opus Dei spiritual director who recommended the single life to me. Think priests and nuns had positive intentions, but Opus Dei spiritual director just looked down on me and thought I wasn’t good enough for marriage.

But I have had severe difficulties with Christian communities since I became a young adult. Became infatuated with a faithful Catholic guy, initially he liked me but then things didn’t work out and he lost interest. Have been heartbroken since then and never recovered the sense of happiness and excitement for life, struggled with horrible horrible depression since then. Dated again and think I could be happy with an ex who will convert to Catholicism but it seems better to be a consecrated virgin if possible since it is a higher state. Think I would be both bored and unhappy as a nun, particularly since I am black and no one else would be in a community that considers the pro-life issue the most important so I would be isolated. So it seems that it is better to be a consecrated virgin than a nun.
 
Praying for you. Do what’s best for you and what you feel in your heart. I have been married for 51+ years and would have no other vocation, marriage has been great for me. I have children and grandchildren that have been a great source of pride and joy for my wife and me.
 
Praying for you. Do what’s best for you and what you feel in your heart. I have been married for 51+ years and would have no other vocation, marriage has been great for me. I have children and grandchildren that have been a great source of pride and joy for my wife and me.
Thank you for prayers.
 
Feel pressure both from myself and from others. Pressure from myself comes from perfectionism. Want to be a virgin dedicated to God because it is a higher state than marriage, and to earn as much merit from heaven as possible for eternal reward. With only one life, it seems it should be used for God. Perhaps this is scrupulosity?

From others b/c several priests and a nun have recommended that I become a nun. Used to have an Opus Dei spiritual director who recommended the single life to me. Think priests and nuns had positive intentions, but Opus Dei spiritual director just looked down on me and thought I wasn’t good enough for marriage.

But I have had severe difficulties with Christian communities since I became a young adult. Became infatuated with a faithful Catholic guy, initially he liked me but then things didn’t work out and he lost interest. Have been heartbroken since then and never recovered the sense of happiness and excitement for life, struggled with horrible horrible depression since then. Dated again and think I could be happy with an ex who will convert to Catholicism but it seems better to be a consecrated virgin if possible since it is a higher state. Think I would be both bored and unhappy as a nun, particularly since I am black and no one else would be in a community that considers the pro-life issue the most important so I would be isolated. So it seems that it is better to be a consecrated virgin than a nun.
I think you need to take all of this to a spiritual director. Just because you’ve sort of decided that since x and y and z don’t work, you should be a consecrated virgin, doesn’t necessarily make that your calling. It doesn’t mean that it isn’t, but the process is a lot more than just saying “this and this and this don’t work.” You need to meet with a spiritual director who can help to guide you through what you’re experiencing, and in effect help you discern your vocation. You’re in my prayers
 
Dear Lord, we ask for your blessings upon HailStarofSea, that you would illuminate his/her mind to your will for his/her life, and set his/her heart on fire for you, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Please instill in his/her heart your spirit of charity, obedience, strength, courage, and perseverance to stay true to your will in this world of selfishness, sin and apathy. Thank you, Lord of the universe, for hearing our prayers on behalf of HailStarofSea. In your most holy name we pray, Amen!
 
Give ear to my words, O Lord,
Consider my meditation.
Give heed to the voice of my cry,
My King and my God,
For to You I will pray. Psalm 5:1,2

Dear God, we honor you and thank you for Jesus Christ’s example of humility. We thank you tor HailStarofSea’s interest in doing Your Will. Please guide and direct her as she ponders her vocation, during her prayers and meditation and discussions with spiritually mature persons let it be known to her, by your Holy Spirit in her heart, what course is pleasing to you and best for her. Please forgive us our sins. In the name of Jesus Christ.
 
Feel pressure both from myself and from others. Pressure from myself comes from perfectionism. Want to be a virgin dedicated to God because it is a higher state than marriage, and to earn as much merit from heaven as possible for eternal reward. With only one life, it seems it should be used for God. Perhaps this is scrupulosity?

From others b/c several priests and a nun have recommended that I become a nun. Used to have an Opus Dei spiritual director who recommended the single life to me. Think priests and nuns had positive intentions, but Opus Dei spiritual director just looked down on me and thought I wasn’t good enough for marriage.

But I have had severe difficulties with Christian communities since I became a young adult. Became infatuated with a faithful Catholic guy, initially he liked me but then things didn’t work out and he lost interest. Have been heartbroken since then and never recovered the sense of happiness and excitement for life, struggled with horrible horrible depression since then. Dated again and think I could be happy with an ex who will convert to Catholicism but it seems better to be a consecrated virgin if possible since it is a higher state. **Think I would be both bored and unhappy as a nun, particularly since I am black and no one else would be in a community that considers the pro-life issue the most important so I would be isolated. ** So it seems that it is better to be a consecrated virgin than a nun.
I think you have some misconceptions there about the religious life. I know of many communities that have members from a wide range of racial, ethnic and socio-cultural backgrounds. It doesn’t matter to them or to God. And I do not understand what you mean thinking “[they] consider the pro-life issue the most important” because there are very, very few communities dedicated only to pro-life issues.

I seem to recall another thread where you felt you were being pushed towards religious life because you thought others saw you as inadequate for marriage. I wonder if this is not something that is coming from others but from yourself. As I said in response to that thread:

Just because they can’t but their finger on why they think you would be suited to religious life doesn’t mean their intentions are bad. Sometimes it is a purely subjective thing and they may have good intentions but still can’t explain to you why they think that. Often seeing those qualities in someone is just a gut instinct.

I really doubt people are suggesting you should become a religious because of your race or because they think you could not marry. More likely, they see qualities of holiness and faith in you and that is a great compliment. It is not an insult, religious life is not the back-up plan for those who cannot find spouses.

Of course I will keep you in my prayers.
 
I think you need to take all of this to a spiritual director. Just because you’ve sort of decided that since x and y and z don’t work, you should be a consecrated virgin, doesn’t necessarily make that your calling. It doesn’t mean that it isn’t, but the process is a lot more than just saying “this and this and this don’t work.” You need to meet with a spiritual director who can help to guide you through what you’re experiencing, and in effect help you discern your vocation. You’re in my prayers
Yes, this is true. Thank you very much for this advice.
 
I think you have some misconceptions there about the religious life. I know of many communities that have members from a wide range of racial, ethnic and socio-cultural backgrounds.
Well, this referred specifically to being black, socio-cultural and ethnic backgrounds can refer to anything, i.e. being Irish vs. Anglo-Saxon. Some bridges are harder to bridge than others. Of the only two blacks in communities in my area, one is a bishop suffering from severe depression and the other doesn’t even live with the community. She is a professor in another state. They have also done research studies that show unhappiness in blacks compared to people who aren’t clergy. Here is an article by CNN: cnn.com/2010/OPINION/09/05/white.catholic.black/index.html Dr. C. Vanessa White is assistant professor of spirituality and the director of the Augustus Tolton Pastoral Ministry Program at Catholic Theological Union in Chicago, Illinois. So just because they are there, if you have seen blacks and not just people from other backgrounds, doesn’t actually mean that they are happy.

If you are not going to be happy, it doesn’t make sense to go, does it? Or is there some deeper purpose served by joining like offering your pain to God?
It doesn’t matter to them or to God. And I do not understand what you mean thinking “[they] consider the pro-life issue the most important” because there are very, very few communities dedicated only to pro-life issues.
There need to be more. The Vatican is doing a crackdown on religious orders because they are failing to prioritize the pro-life issue. See this thread discussing how the Vatican is demanding a reform: forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=666901

Religious life is inspiring b/c of the saints, who did heroic moral deeds to help the world, whether through prayer, theology, or social service. For example, St. Maximilian Kolbe helped the person in the concentration camp, St. Katherine Drexel and St. Peter Claver helped Native Americans and blacks, St. Catherine of Siena helped the poor, St. Faustina prayed for Poland and those in purgatory, nearing Hell, etc. Being a religious is not worth very much if you are not going to use it to help others; the religious who were wealthy and owned slaves were not good people. The Diary of St. Bridget of Sweden says that the religious who just sought worldly renown were going to Hell. So it is not inspiring to me to be in a community that is not working either through prayer or social service on the most important genocide of our day, more important than the Holocaust, slavery, or colonialism.

The other issues ARE important, of course, but just like many religious orders during the Holocaust hid the Jews, it seems all should have some sort of pro-life ministry even if it is just prayer. 🙂
 
Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death.
Amen
I pray for you. May God guide you in your discernment of His plans for you. May He lead you to people, friends, family, and loved ones who can help you find out the best path for you. And may the Lord let you know in ways you understand His wonderful plans for your future. AMEN.
Dear Lord, we ask for your blessings upon HailStarofSea, that you would illuminate his/her mind to your will for his/her life, and set his/her heart on fire for you, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Please instill in his/her heart your spirit of charity, obedience, strength, courage, and perseverance to stay true to your will in this world of selfishness, sin and apathy. Thank you, Lord of the universe, for hearing our prayers on behalf of HailStarofSea. In your most holy name we pray, Amen!
Give ear to my words, O Lord,
Consider my meditation.
Give heed to the voice of my cry,
My King and my God,
For to You I will pray. Psalm 5:1,2

Dear God, we honor you and thank you for Jesus Christ’s example of humility. We thank you tor HailStarofSea’s interest in doing Your Will. Please guide and direct her as she ponders her vocation, during her prayers and meditation and discussions with spiritually mature persons let it be known to her, by your Holy Spirit in her heart, what course is pleasing to you and best for her. Please forgive us our sins. In the name of Jesus Christ.
Thank you very much. :hug1:
 
Prayer for Vocations

Lord Jesus, let your call be heard
by the fervent and generous hearts
of young people, and make them
your followers and ministers.
Provident and loving Jesus,
grant to those whom you call
the necessary means to succeed
and the grace to persevere.
May they meet the demands of their call
and become salt of the earth
and light of the world,
holy ministers and dispensers
of the mysteries of God.
We ask you for vocations
for the whole Church,
vocations according to your heart,
numerous enough
to meet the pressing needs
of your Church and the world.
Send true shepherds of souls
filled with the Holy Spirit.
May their hearts be detached
from all worldly entanglements.
Make your priests holy, Lord,
splendid and exceptional witnesses
to the world
that the humankind cannot be transformed
without the spirit of the Beatitudes.
Amen.

Prayer to Mary for Vocations

O VIrgin Mary,
Mother of Jesus,
and Mother of the Church,
to you we commend
our young people,
in particular those
called to closely follow
your Son.
You know the difficulties,
the struggles,
the obstacles they must face.
Assist them to answer “yes”
to the divine call, as you did
at the invitation of the angel.
Draw them near to your heart
so that they can understand
the beauty and the joy that
awaits them when the Lord Jesus
calls them into His intimacy,
to be witnesses of His love
in the world. Amen.
 
Prayer for Vocations

Lord Jesus, let your call be heard
by the fervent and generous hearts
of young people, and make them
your followers and ministers.
Provident and loving Jesus,
grant to those whom you call
the necessary means to succeed
and the grace to persevere.
May they meet the demands of their call
and become salt of the earth
and light of the world,
holy ministers and dispensers
of the mysteries of God.
We ask you for vocations
for the whole Church,
vocations according to your heart,
numerous enough
to meet the pressing needs
of your Church and the world.
Send true shepherds of souls
filled with the Holy Spirit.
May their hearts be detached
from all worldly entanglements.
Make your priests holy, Lord,
splendid and exceptional witnesses
to the world
that the humankind cannot be transformed
without the spirit of the Beatitudes.
Amen.

Prayer to Mary for Vocations

O VIrgin Mary,
Mother of Jesus,
and Mother of the Church,
to you we commend
our young people,
in particular those
called to closely follow
your Son.
You know the difficulties,
the struggles,
the obstacles they must face.
Assist them to answer “yes”
to the divine call, as you did
at the invitation of the angel.
Draw them near to your heart
so that they can understand
the beauty and the joy that
awaits them when the Lord Jesus
calls them into His intimacy,
to be witnesses of His love
in the world. Amen.
Thank you very much! ❤️
 
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