Prayer request and help

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bluecollarjock

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I appreciate many of you who have prayed for me before concerning this situation. I admit at times I can live in the present moment trusting God, but others my faith is weak. It is hard to meditate peacefully at times on Matthew 6:25-34 and Luke 9:58 when the potential for homelessness is realistic. So I please ask that you pray for my faith to be strengthened and for me to learn “let go and let God” and trust He will provide for me during this time.

I am a medically retired police officer, worked patrol in the ghetto, SWAT, Peer Support, and police academy instructor.

About 5 years ago I was forced to retire and in horrific shape medically. If I was not in such good shape going into my botched surgeries and complications the doctors said I may not have made it. After 3 years of messed up surgeries and being over medicated, my immune system, digestive system, and endocrine system were all destroyed. I also was left with permanent intestinal issues due to the surgical errors and cannot be fixed and cause serious implications in the ability to carry out my daily life activities. I was on 8 different narcotic pain killers, muscle relaxers, anxiety medications, depression medications, and sleep medications when they retired me. I went from a fit SWAT cop and college strength coach that could keep up with the athletes in workouts, to 270 pounds, 30 % bodyfat, grossly obese and chronically ill.

Through caring doctors and a lot of hard work, exercise, prayer, meditation, nutrition, physical therapy, chiropractor, and counseling I got back in shape which took about two years. Then with much sacrifice I worked around my disability to finish a master’s degree in sport psychology at the top of my class. I received the highest grades of any student they have ever had in the program. Over winter breaks I coached NFL combine athletes, and in the summers I volunteered for sports ministry.

I was going to devote my time to sports ministry for a year while applying to doctoral counseling programs, and specifically trying to find programs that integrated theology. I got a new workers compensation case worker who told me that in his opinion I was no longer disabled, that I needed to work full time and he would choose my jobs (going so far to call himself my “life coach”), that I was not allowed to be in graduate school or do ministry. He also told me my doctors cost too much money and his goal was to terminate my benefits. They made good on those threats cutting me off all my disability income and medical care for the last ten months despite no evidence against me. Nearly all the progress I made in my health over the course of four years deteriorated and the only thing they want to approve now is narcotics and psychiatric medications.

There are serious loopholes in the state workers compensation laws, and disabled seem to be guilty until proven innocent. They filed the termination without telling me and lying that my paychecks were in the mail. I was out of town with my parents celebrating my mom surviving a brain tumor and dad surviving emergency surgery for organ failure. They were hoping that because I did not have a lawyer I would miss their letter and the time frame to appeal. The stories of their corruption and deceit continue for this entire time-please see article about the same company doing this to police officers in Texas fwweekly.com/2013/12/18/a-maze-of-pain/

I won the first court case. They even court ordered me to see one of the best surgeons in the nation. He sided with me, testifying that clearly I am disabled and should keep seeing my current doctors. Yet my former employer has stuck me with tens of thousands of dollars of unpaid medical bills, refused to resume my medical care, and refuse to resume my disability pay in addition to owing me nearly a year of backpay. They want me to quit fighting or pile up legal fees so I am forced to quit. They waited the full month and filed an appeal on the 30th day just to drag it out as long as possible. Now I have to survive 3-6 more months without income or medical care.

I have a police pension that starts in two years, but due to these same state workers compensation laws I cannot collect it yet. I have destroyed my finances. Social Security Disability takes such a long time that it will not help me in this crisis period.

At this point my health, my ego, my finances, and my ability to provide for myself has been broken by this legal case and its consequences. In a good way it forces me to turn more to God, although I do not always go about it as happily as Paul seems to write about his adversity. Reading Richard Rohr books seem to help a lot.

Adding insult to injury of cutting off medical care and disability pay, during the discovery process they accused me of hiding income from any volunteer ministry I have done. Many of these ministries I was involved with before even being retired so it is irrelevant, but in workers compensation court the burden is on me to prove myself innocent so any charges they file cause me stress, legal homework, and more potential legal fees consulting my attorney. They go so far to even accuse me of hiding income from attending prayer services. Somehow the past few months I have been able to pray for them and it does help. Maybe if enough people pray for them my heart will continue to soften for them and maybe theirs will too.
 
Bluecollarjock:

Lord I am sorry to hear all of this. People just don’t realize how unfair and cruel our system is when it comes to caring for the disabled and chronically ill in this country. I fight the system everyday for my sister, who is dying from Crohns Disease. Surgical error left her right lung paralyzed several years ago, and two years ago they perforated her colon and almost killed her. She was in the hospital 50 days and has never recovered.

I wish I could just give you a hug, a smile a nod of understanding. The system needs to change and the sick and disabled need to be treated with respect instead of dead beats. And I am tired of people acting like those who have to receive disability are doing it fraudulently. Most are not.

You have my prayers believe me. I will share with my sister.
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†
 
Thank you all so so much for your prayers and comments.

Yes, there are people who are milking the system I am certain, but from my experiences and articles such as the one I listed, seems to be lots of cops and firefighters, and in the recent news soldiers who really are injured and get shafted big time by corruption to save money, delay, deny, ignore is the motto of workers comp.

By doing the right thing I was doing the wrong thing legally. Because of my issues and how difficult it is to manage my days, by going to grad school, doing volunteer ministry, going to the gym, and coaching an hour or two a day, they turn around and try to paint a picture in court “look he is muscular and fit, went to grad school, does ministry and coaching, he is not disabled and faking it”…so basically if I went to bars every night, drank like a fish, took all the Vicodin and Xanax they offer up freely in the work comp system, I could have kept collecting my checks without a hitch. By getting an education, giving back to kids in youth ministry, working out at the gym to manage my depression and improve my health and the fact is I have been a lifetime athlete so why would I stop just because I have disabilities, well doing these things gives them reasons to try to cut me off and accuse me falsely of being a fraud and a fake.

They have done many corrupt things and lie in their reports and even in court…their answer to why have they paid my medical bills for 6 years was “it was a voluntary error”…is a complete lie…I have stacks of emails from me to both work comp company and risk management from my old employer, keeping them informed of every major medical appointment for 8 years, as well before they pay any medical bill the doctors must send in the reports and extra notes, which they read before they pay. So they pay for all kinds of care for 6 years and now claim it was a mistake, and my doctors are frauds and not treating me properly…when 5 years ago I was bedridden and barely able to perform basic life functions…to getting in trouble for working out, going to grad school, coaching and doing ministry because the doctors did do such an amazing job. Just sick…and I am surprised my case worker did not get fired, he lied to me and the doctors about so many things, but his only error I bet he now regrets is being honest on the phone “you cost too much so my goal is to cut you off your benefits”…he even lied in court about documents he claims he did not see in my file…

So yea its frustrating…and scary I do not even know how I am going to pay next month’s rent…
 
Memorare

REMEMBER, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help, or sought thy intercession was left unaided. Inspired with this confidence, I fly to thee, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother; to thee do I come; before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy mercy hear and answer me. Amen.
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†
 
If you have a miraculous medal, wear it. I would try very hard to get to a Marian shrine, or a church with a Marian Feast. day name and go on that feast day for a special indulgence. If all these are unavailable in your state, try the Mary, undoer of knots novena or the five Saturdays Fatima devotion. I feel that you should turn to Mary for help in this. God bless!

Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes

Oh ever immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen.

O Mary conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!
 
***Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death
Amen.

:crossrc:***
 
I do have a miraculous medal…the rope broke so I will need to find a new chain or rope to get it on…
 
Hail Mary,
Full of grace,
The Lord is with Thee.
Blessed art Thou amoungst women,
And blessed is the fruit of Thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
Pray for us sinners,
Now and at the hour of death,
Amen
 
Praying that the Lord may grant you strength and guide you in all these matters. Also praying for all necessary graces for you.

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen
 
Thanks for the prayers. Just found out I won the second case too, again they were found to be in bad faith, have to pay my lawyer fees, and ordered to be responsible for my medical care. So first case I won they owe me disability pay and I clearly am still disabled, second case is they are still responsible for my medical bills. The hard part is they can appeal, so it is anti climatic that the appeals drag it on forever it seems. But God is good I am winning. Just surviving in the meantime is the struggle.
 
They keep appealing…please continue to pray…and if possible, go to this Give forward site my friend created and leave a prayer there. Not asking for donations, just for people to drop by and add some prayers and spread the link to their friends.

gfwd.at/1pkUSlf

Was hoping to be doing ministry this year but instead I am worrying about being homeless and getting food on the table. But trusting God has something big planned.
 
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