Prayer request: sinned greatly and not sure I even have contrition

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please offer a short prayer for me…I have sinned more grievously now than I have in recent memory. In addition to those grave sins, I feel more and more indifferent and rebellious towards God. Not only that, even though I hold certain beliefs, in the face of slightest resistance or opposition, I crumbled and committed evil.

i feel both presumptuous and despairing.

if i could go back in time, i would never do these things. i have willingly chosen sin over God, with full knowledge.

is forgiveness even possible? I know it’s said that God forgives all sin, but that requires contrition.

i don’t know if i am contrite. just sorry i have committed them and wish i could go back in time and undo them. i’m also fearful of the just punishment that will ensue.

would God forgive me even though i had committed great evil? what if my heart is already too deadened and incapable of truly repenting?
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.



Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.



Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.



Prayer to Saint Maximilian Maria Kolbe

St. Maximilian, amidst the hate and lonely misery of Auschwitz, you brought love into the lives of fellow captives and sowed the seeds of hope amidst despair. You bore witness to the world by word and deed that “Love alone creates.” Help me to become more like you. With the Church and Mary and you, may I proclaim that “Love alone creates.” To the hungry and oppressed, the naked and homeless, the scorned and hated, the lonely and despairing, may I proclaim the power of Christ’s love, which endures forever and ever. Amen.



For Help in Trials

Most holy apostle St. Jude, faithful servant and friend of Jesus, the name of the traitor who delivered your beloved Master into the hands of His enemies has caused you to be forgotten by many. But the Church honors and invokes you universally as the patron of hopeless cases–of things despaired of. Pray for me who feels so hopeless. Make use, I implore you, of that particular privilege accorded to you of bringing visible and speedy help where help is almost despaired of. Come to my assistance in this great need, that I may receive the consolations and succor of heaven in all my necessities, tribulations and sufferings, in particular (EIF5A), and that I may bless God with you and all the elect throughout eternity. I promise you, O Blessed St. Jude, to be ever mindful of this great favor, and I will never cease to honor you as my special and powerful patron, and to do all in my power to encourage devotion to you. Amen.

 
Praying for you!

No sin is greater than God’s Mercy! Be not afraid.
 
If you were truly deadened and hardened and incapable of repentance, I seriously doubt that you would be posting your concern/ issue/ prayer request on a forum board at Catholic Answers. I am certainly no expert about these things, but my understanding is that those who are deadened, hardened and incapable of repentance, have no concern about their sin/ wrong doing and/ or whether they are still able to repent. If Jesus can forgive St Peter (for denying Christ three times) and St. Paul (for persecuting and killing the early Christians) … then Jesus can certainly forgive you whatever you have done.

I believe that even Judas Iscariot (who betrayed Jesus for 30 pieces of silver) could even have been forgive by Christ. The problem was that Judas did not ask for forgiveness. Even after three years in Jesus’ presence and under Jesus’ ministry and teaching, Judas did not understand the depths and richness of God’s grace, love, mercy and forgiveness. He did not ask. I would encourage you to learn from Judas. You can/ will be forgiven if you ask. That is why we have the sacrament of reconciliation; it is a healing sacrament and it restores us to right relationship with God.
 
Get thee to confession. In the sacrament of penance, perfect contrition is not required- a fear of hell suffices. Of course, perfect contrition is better. One thing I do to create more contrition in my heart for my sin is to think on each sin I have committed and for each sin I say the Jesus Prayer. (“Lord Jesus Christ, son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.”) You could try that or something like it. I will pray for you.
 
Go to confession, receive absolution. If you sin, go to confession again. God will forgive you. Pray for the grace to have true sorrow for having offended God. Forgive yourself as well. I will be praying for you.
 
Hail Mary,
Full of Grace,
The Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death.
Amen.
 
Friend, if we confess, He forgives. Don’t mistake not FEELING contrite with not BEING contrite. The very fact you consider your sin at all demonstrates that on some level you are sorry. From your post, and I could be wrong, but I can sense your sorrow and struggle powerfully. I am often resistant to going to confession (resistant–I’m scared!) but EVERY SINGLE TIME I go to confession I palpably feel the weight lifting and I cling to the absolution offered. I have never been met with anything but mercy and loving kindness from the priest and when I inevitably start to doubt…‘did I really confess everything and was I really sorrowful enough?’ …I remind myself of the words of assurance spoken by the priest and resolve to believe those over my feelings and doubts. I so very much wish you the best and will absolutely be praying for you and your wonderful seeking heart. The whole reason Jesus lived and died as God-Man is to save our wretched souls; if we reject that or think that we’re too far gone for the mercy of God to cover our sin then we diminish the incredible gift and sacrifice offered us.
 
Praying for your intentions. May want to consider seeing a priest to discuss this issue.

God bless,

Mary.
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.



Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.



Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.



Prayer to Saint Maximilian Maria Kolbe

St. Maximilian, amidst the hate and lonely misery of Auschwitz, you brought love into the lives of fellow captives and sowed the seeds of hope amidst despair. You bore witness to the world by word and deed that “Love alone creates.” Help me to become more like you. With the Church and Mary and you, may I proclaim that “Love alone creates.” To the hungry and oppressed, the naked and homeless, the scorned and hated, the lonely and despairing, may I proclaim the power of Christ’s love, which endures forever and ever. Amen.



For Help in Trials

Most holy apostle St. Jude, faithful servant and friend of Jesus, the name of the traitor who delivered your beloved Master into the hands of His enemies has caused you to be forgotten by many. But the Church honors and invokes you universally as the patron of hopeless cases–of things despaired of. Pray for me who feels so hopeless. Make use, I implore you, of that particular privilege accorded to you of bringing visible and speedy help where help is almost despaired of. Come to my assistance in this great need, that I may receive the consolations and succor of heaven in all my necessities, tribulations and sufferings, in particular (EIF5A), and that I may bless God with you and all the elect throughout eternity. I promise you, O Blessed St. Jude, to be ever mindful of this great favor, and I will never cease to honor you as my special and powerful patron, and to do all in my power to encourage devotion to you. Amen.

 
Divine Mercy Chaplet

O Blood and Water, which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus as a fountain of Mercy for us, I trust in You!
O Blood and Water, which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus as a fountain of Mercy for us, I trust in You!
O Blood and Water, which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus as a fountain of Mercy for us, I trust in You!

Our Father, Who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy name; Thy kingdom come; Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread; and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us; and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil, Amen.

Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death, Amen.

I believe in God, the Father almighty, Creator of heaven and earth, and in Jesus Christ, His only Son, our Lord, who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died and was buried; He descended into hell; on the third day He rose again from the dead; He ascended into heaven, and is seated at the right hand of God the Father almighty; from there He will come to judge the living and the dead. I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and life everlasting. Amen.

Eternal Father, I offer you the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Your Dearly Beloved Son, Our Lord, Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.

For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us and on the whole world.
 
Psalm 51

Have mercy on me, God,
in your goodness;
in your abundant compassion blot out my offense.
Wash away all my guilt;
from my sin cleanse me.

For I know my offense;
my sin is always before me.
Against you alone have I sinned;
I have done such evil in your sight
That you are just in your sentence,
blameless when you condemn.

True, I was born guilty,
a sinner, even as my mother conceived me.
Still, you insist on sincerity of heart;
in my inmost being teach me wisdom.

Cleanse me with hyssop,
that I may be pure;
wash me, make me whiter than snow.
Let me hear sounds of joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
Turn away your face from my sins;
blot out all my guilt.
A clean heart create for me, God;
renew in me a steadfast spirit.

Do not drive me from your presence,
nor take from me your holy spirit.
Restore my joy in your salvation;
sustain in me a willing spirit.
I will teach the wicked your ways,
that sinners may return to you.
Rescue me from death,
God, my saving God,
that my tongue may praise your healing power.

Lord, open my lips;
my mouth will proclaim your praise.
For you do not desire sacrifice;
a burnt offering you would not accept.
My sacrifice, God, is a broken spirit;
God, do not spurn a broken, humbled heart.

Make Zion prosper in your good pleasure;
rebuild the walls of Jerusalem.
Then you will be pleased with proper sacrifice,
burnt offerings and holocausts;
then bullocks will be offered on your altar.
Amen.
 
Thank you everyone for your prayers.

I finally went, even though I was telling myself I can wait until Saturday. (But I could slip on ice and fall and die…and dying in mortal sin is not something I wanted to risk…)

I wish for real contrition, but it’s mostly fear of hell and just feeling stupid for falling into that sin and being so weak-willed…

Looking back, I could sense laziness (prayer started to get less and less in frequency and devotion — it felt like a chore that I had to do — then I just stopped because I thought as long as I don’t sin greatly, I can go without spiritual devotion.)

Well, that didn’t work out so well…

Back to penance…

Good day everyone, and drive/walk safely if you’re in wintry weather.
 
Praying for your reconciliation. God can forgive us. It’s not that God won’t forgive us. It is only when we think God can’t forgive us that that becomes a road block causing us to not come to him for that forgiveness. As long as you go to Confession you can have reasonable assurance of forgiveness.
 

A Prayer for the Virtue of Obedience

Jesus, Almighty King of kings,
You Who obeyed Your Father to the end,
Teach me the meaning of obedience.
My soul burns to comply to Your Will,
Striving to charm Your Divinity.
While my worldly nature seeks one way,
My spiritual nature seeks another.
Bless me with the strength to obey,
That my soul may subdue both natures,
Blending them as a fair aromatic bloom.
I always seek favor in Your eyes,
To always obey You until my last breath!

Jesus, I trust in You!

Amen.

Prayer for Endless Mercy

Eternal God, in whom mercy is endless
and the treasury of compassion inexhaustible,
look kindly upon us and increase Your mercy
in us, that in difficult moments we might
not despair nor become despondent,
but with great confidence submit ourselves
to Your holy will, which is Love and Mercy itself. Amen.

:signofcross:

 
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