Abba let me not be wasted
My Father, please do not let me be wasted! I cling to you with eyes full of knowledge of my sinfulness raised pleadingly to Yours. I know that You cannot reject me, with love great as Yours. You gaze at me with tenderness as tears trickle from my heart.
Father, let me not be wasted. Throughout the ages, only now do I have opportunity for a lifetime of faith and love to benefit others and to seek eternal joy. You know I try to love and serve, but inadequately, and might despair except for Your love. Instead, I lean my cheek to Yours, knowing that You cannot turn me away, and that Your heart moves with irrepressible pity!
I am only a scrap of humanity crippled by sinfulness and doubt, who slipped past Your great and holy ones, into Your arms. Yet I am a person, redeemed, therefore, You may use me to serve the kingdom of Your love. You may use me to delight the deep recesses of Your heart!
I open to You all my sinfulness, along with any merit granted to me. Into Your mercy, I surrender all goodness, all iniquity of my life—for to withhold anything from You is ‘‘privacy’’ and ‘‘a possession’’ that could ruin Your life in me. Although I am tempted to lose heart before my sinfulness and lukewarmness facing Your resplendent holiness, I know that, despite frailty and difficulties, You can bring good beyond all human thought and ways.
Do not let me be wasted, Father. Little is possible to me, but all is to You. Two humble loaves, five paltry fish, can in divine hands break to feed a multitude! I do not doubt divine foolishness in love that gives a-billion fold for gift of the little that I am. Nothing in me or in my life justifies such extravagant hope. Yet Your eyes sparkle softly with delight and I am lost within their depths and found within Your all powerful, transforming, compassionate and unconditional love.
In response to human sin, Father, You mercifully give us Christ and Church, saints and martyrs, forgiveness and redemption, sacrament and grace, love, and everlasting life. Glimpsing the mystery of so vast divine compassion, I dare to ask for everything, for each holy soul…for each person who strives and suffers…for each poor soul, frail, misled, errant, or ordinary. I plead for each person who dares not presume to come so close to Your loving heart, even if his or her merit is far greater than is mine! For each soul, I ask of You the fullness of Your prayer for them, the full treasure of the name and nature that You intend for each, within time and eternity.
Speak in me, in us, beyond our limited, worldly thoughts, ways and dreams. I trust entirely to You, within my life that is Your own life and sacrament within me. Leave nothing to me—although I will try the best that I can manage. Please Yourself utter and answer all Your love’s hope and intent, with the powerful liberty of creativity, choice, action and love that You yearn to loose in Your children, if only we would cooperate with humility and trust!
In all things, I surrender to the fullness of Your purpose and prayer for me and for others whom You wish to bless through me. I do so especially in the Eucharist, the highest prayer of the whole Mystical Body throughout time, in its true function, actuality and effect. For I am Yours, and plead endlessly in my heart, that you do not allow waste of this little human vessel at Your breast, insignificant as it is except in You.
Thank You Father that I can hope in Your merciful love that embraces even the ‘least’ of persons. 1982
