Prayers Needed for Something like Scrupulosity

  • Thread starter Thread starter Kevin12
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
K

Kevin12

Guest
I hesitate to call what I have frequently experienced scruples, but it is something similar to that. Basically, since I came in contact with this forum and others like it, and particularly have come into contact with traditionalists types who can always produce a dozen quotes from the saints about how anything you can imagine is a sin and how almost all of us are going to hell, I feel like everything that I do is probably a sin, or would be considered so by the Church a hundred years ago. But far from driving me to repentance for what I know to be my very real sins, more and more I feel nothing but anger and resentment toward God and more particularly the Church, and most of all, I feel almost hatred toward many people who identify as traditionalists. I feel like, before I had contact with these people, even if I had towering doubts about God, I never doubted that if God did exist, God was loving and merciful. But now God feels cruel and arbitrary, a God concerned more than anything with rituals being performed to the letter. I don’t say this to be uncharitable towards traditionalists, I know that most of them are good people who just have a preference for the TLM.

I just want to be to ignore all these voices that are effecting my view of God and the Church in this way.
 
Praying. Try reading St Faustina’s Diary of Divine Mercy and for now stay away from reading things which upset you and hurt your spiritual growth.
 
Kevin12 said:
I hesitate to call what I have frequently experienced scruples, but it is something similar to that. Basically, since I came in contact with this forum and others like it, and particularly have come into contact with traditionalists types who can always produce a dozen quotes from the saints about how anything you can imagine is a sin and how almost all of us are going to hell, I feel like everything that I do is probably a sin, or would be considered so by the Church a hundred years ago. But far from driving me to repentance for what I know to be my very real sins, more and more I feel nothing but anger and resentment toward God and more particularly the Church, and most of all, I feel almost hatred toward many people who identify as traditionalists. I feel like, before I had contact with these people, even if I had towering doubts about God, I never doubted that if God did exist, God was loving and merciful. But now God feels cruel and arbitrary, a God concerned more than anything with rituals being performed to the letter. I don’t say this to be uncharitable towards traditionalists, I know that most of them are good people who just have a preference for the TLM.

I just want to be to ignore all these voices that are effecting my view of God and the Church in this way.
Click to expand...
Truly, God is rich in mercy . . .
Ephesians 2:4-10New Revised Standard Version Catholic Edition (NRSVCE)

4 But God, who is rich in mercy, out of the great love with which he loved us 5 even when we were dead through our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ[a]—by grace you have been saved— 6 and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, 7 so that in the ages to come he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. 8 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God— 9 not the result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are what he has made us, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand to be our way of life.
 
**Prayer of William of St.Thierry **

Lord, I will seek your face and continually search for your face as much as I can and as much as you render me capable of doing. Lord, my God, my one hope, hear me lest exhausted I lose the will to seek you. May I ardently seek you always. Give the strength to seek, you who have given the desire. And when the strength is sufficient, add to the desire that which you have given. May I always remember you, understand you, and love you until, faithfully remembering you and prudently understanding you and truthfully loving you, O Triune God, according to the fullness which you know, you reform me to your image in which you have created me.
Amen.

Jesus, I trust in You!
 
wild_thing said:
**Prayer of William of St.Thierry **

Lord, I will seek your face and continually search for your face as much as I can and as much as you render me capable of doing. Lord, my God, my one hope, hear me lest exhausted I lose the will to seek you. May I ardently seek you always. Give the strength to seek, you who have given the desire. And when the strength is sufficient, add to the desire that which you have given. May I always remember you, understand you, and love you until, faithfully remembering you and prudently understanding you and truthfully loving you, O Triune God, according to the fullness which you know, you reform me to your image in which you have created me.
Amen.

Jesus, I trust in You!
Click to expand...
👍
 
Praying to the Holy Spirit to give you guidance, direction, strength, fortitude & wisdom in your time of need.
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†
 
Praying that God reintroduces you to His mercy and compassion and leads you to focus on His love, not human imperfection or sin.
:gopray:
 
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†
 
Thanks to everyone for their prayers.

I wish I could report a happier result, but my feelings haven’t really subsided. Maybe the answer is that I should turn away from everything I enjoy that might an occasion of sin, like where there could be a woman with a skirt that isn’t below her knees—something I never found in the least exciting but I know understand is considered immodest.

So basically, I will have to become a Puritan. The more I look into it, the more it seems like that’s what the Church demands. It’s not enough to simply not sin or try not to sin. You have to be a Puritan or go to hell. Only for me, having to be a Puritan pretty well corresponds to my idea of hell. So I guess I am just going to be damned no matter what.

I wish I had never heard of traditionalists. I wish I had just stayed the way I was, struggling to believe or not to sin, but not realizing that Catholicism doesn’t seem to be substantially different from Puritanism—indeed, the Cure d’Ars and St. Leonard of Port Maurice are basically just Catholic versions of Jonathan Edwards, to the point you might not be able to tell the difference if I gave you random passages.
 
I realize that sounded a little dramatic. Anyway, please do pray for me, I certainly need it, one way or the other.
 
Holy Spirit, enter Your servant’s mind that all may be wiped clean and pure by Your hand. May the light of God, the Divine Clarity which only You know, enter into Your servant’s soul. Amen.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top