A
AKDee
Guest
I really need prayers right now. I’ve had an ongoing issue with my mom for about a year and a half. She accused me back then of something I didn’t do, and cut me out of her life. Since then, I’ve been trying to heal the rift between us with cards, flowers, gifts, a letter. I have even tried to talk to her on the phone, prepared to accept the blame for what she says I did, even though I didn’t do any of it. She threw some of my gifts away, and has never responded to any of my cards/letter, and won’t speak with me. We had been very close previously, so this has been devastating for me. I haven’t been able to accept that this is permanent, and it’s been causing me to have health problems due to the constant stress. I am going to start therapy soon to help me learn to deal with it, and I mentioned that to my dad. Why he told my mom that, I have no idea, but he did and her response to that was - “Good. She needs therapy.” It’s a short sentence, but it threw me into a tailspin, because the only reason I need therapy is because of her callous treatment of me and her refusal to have any type of relationship with me. Her comment struck me as extremely cruel. I got really angry about it, which initially felt good. Kind of freeing because it helped me to see how poorly she’s really treated me all this time. For a year and a half I have felt responsible for fixing something I didn’t break. Some of this is driven by my Catholic beliefs- treat your parents with respect, forgive, anger is a sin. But yesterday I felt free to stop trying to fix things, to stop trying to repair the relationship. I don’t want revenge, but I am so tired of her having the power to cause me pain. And while she won’t speak to me directly, my dad becomes a channel for her to get her passive aggressive messages to me. I’ve tried telling my dad to stop telling me what she says, but he can’t help himself. She’s nasty to him too, and I think he uses me as a pressure relief valve. But as a result, I feel so stressed out today, and my health problems are worse when I’m stressed.
Sorry, that got longer than I intended, but I’m so frustrated and sad and angry right now and I just really need prayers for peace in my soul and for peace with this issue with my mom. It’s so hard for me to accept but she has made it clear she not only doesn’t want us to reconcile but that she actually is pleased I’m suffering over it. I also ask you to pray for my mom. She’s a deeply unhappy person, she doesn’t have a relationship with the Lord (she’s into astrology and reincarnation and other new age stuff like that), and whether she ever reconciles with me or not I desperately want her to have a relationship with our Lord.
Sorry, that got longer than I intended, but I’m so frustrated and sad and angry right now and I just really need prayers for peace in my soul and for peace with this issue with my mom. It’s so hard for me to accept but she has made it clear she not only doesn’t want us to reconcile but that she actually is pleased I’m suffering over it. I also ask you to pray for my mom. She’s a deeply unhappy person, she doesn’t have a relationship with the Lord (she’s into astrology and reincarnation and other new age stuff like that), and whether she ever reconciles with me or not I desperately want her to have a relationship with our Lord.
