Praying for my Unbelieving Husband

[starrball]

I am Catholic and married to a non-believer. I have been realizing just how important it is that I pray for him daily, and to take this seriously, but I want to do more than just a one line prayer each day (and of course I want to pray for others too).

I have a good collection of prayers for an ‘unsaved’ husband, but they are Christian not Catholic and there have been a few discrepancies. I’m on the search for solid Catholic prayers to pray for him, preferably covering multiple areas such as his role as husband, his role as father, protection from the enemy, for his salvation, for his work and role as provider… If there is nothing then I will just have to rewrite some of them myself, but as I’ve only been a Catholic for about 5 years, my knowledge is not always complete, so I am looking for guidance.

Also, while I’m on the topic, what is the Catholic opinion on praying scripture as prayer?

 

[ellie85]

This is from presentation ministries…they have a lot of catholic prayers…Here is one I hope helps, my husband is a non-catholic also, I pray for him daily in my own words, some dedicate part of their rosary prayers, I usually just beg God for him to see the light that shines from me…I will be thinking about you and maybe God will lead them both to the next RCIA Class…

PRAYER FOR THE WIFE OF AN UNBELIEVING HUSBAND

This prayer applies to circumstances when a husband is unbelieving and disobeying God’s word. It applies to many marriages. In these situations, wives should pray both for their husbands and for themselves:

Heavenly Father, I pray that my husband will be won over to Jesus through my conduct. Give me a reverent purity in my way of life. May I be adorned with the hidden character of the heart expressed in the unfading beauty of a calm and gentle disposition (1 Pt 3:1, 2, 4). Father, show me what it means to be Your daughter, a bride of Christ, a temple of the Spirit, and a Christian woman. I repent of my sins and trust You completely. I put my husband, marriage, family, and life into Your hands in Jesus’ name. Amen.

 

[Schieffelin]

As for praying for him in a broad number of areas (role as father, provider, etc.) I highly recommend Stormie OMartian’s “Power of Praying Wife” book of prayers. Don’t get the actual book Power of Praying Wife where she explains why it’s important, just get the actual prayer book that is supposed to accompany it.
christianbook.com/the-power-praying-wife-book-prayers/stormie-omartian/9780736919852/pd/919856?kw=919856&en=froogle&p=1013824&cm_mmc=CBDfeeds--froogle--books-_-919856

I pray for my husband every day out of this book. It is a protestant author, not Catholic but I haven’t found anything objectionable (heretical) in it. It’s just very common-sense and scripture based prayers.

I also used to know of a good prayer for the conversion of someone into the Catholic Church, but I can’t locate it at the moment. If I remember where I saw it I’ll post it later.

 

[cradlecatholic5]

"Power of Praying Wife"

I have the above book and have prayed it.

My husband was a nonbeliever also … w/ lots of prayer & working 12-step programs, I’m so grateful to say he is now a **believer. **

it works if you work it. I always think of St Monica and what she went through w/ her son.

 

[djpetrus]

My husband is Catholic but only in Name. I turn my whole day into a pray.

“Dear Lord, I offer up my whole day, my works joys and suffering for the reparation of sin, the salvation of souls, especially my family.”

I try to exercise daily and offer that as well when my lungs start to hurt and feel like quitting. I sometimes, offer my actions while cleaning, washing dishes or sweeping the floor. I offer my rosary as will. I bind my family’s hearts to the Immaculate Heart of Mary.

I will be praying for you as well and all the other women who’s husbands are non-believing.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

I am Catholic and married to a non-believer. I have been realizing just how important it is that I pray for him daily, and to take this seriously, but I want to do more than just a one line prayer each day (and of course I want to pray for others too).

I have a good collection of prayers for an ‘unsaved’ husband, but they are Christian not Catholic and there have been a few discrepancies. I’m on the search for solid Catholic prayers to pray for him, preferably covering multiple areas such as his role as husband, his role as father, protection from the enemy, for his salvation, for his work and role as provider… If there is nothing then I will just have to rewrite some of them myself, but as I’ve only been a Catholic for about 5 years, my knowledge is not always complete, so I am looking for guidance.

Also, while I’m on the topic, what is the Catholic opinion on praying scripture as prayer?

Pray especially to St. Joseph to help your husband be a good Christian husband and father. Your own words are sufficient, you can just “freestyle” your prayers as you feel called to, customize them for that day or whatever you are going through.

What do you mean by “praying scripture as prayer?” You mean, reading the passage out loud and reminding God of his promises, or something like that?

Catholics usually use structured prayers such as the Our Father (the only prayer Jesus left us) and the Hail Mary, as well as prayers to St. Michael, and any other saints you are drawn to or admire, or the person’s guardian angel is good to ask for help and assistance.

So you were lapsed when you married? So was I. It’s been 20 years since I reverted but no sign of my husband coming back yet…Still praying for God to show him the way home…

Forgot to mention the green scapular. I’ve hidden one under my husband’s side of the mattress. You get it blessed and then put it somewhere in their possessions or like I did, under the mattress. Then every day you pray “Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death.”

 

[starrball]

Pray especially to St. Joseph to help your husband be a good Christian husband and father. Your own words are sufficient, you can just “freestyle” your prayers as you feel called to, customize them for that day or whatever you are going through.

This is a nice idea but at the moment with 3 little ones I rarely get the quiet time to focus or formulate a real prayer, and would do much better for now with something that is pre-set but solid.

What do you mean by “praying scripture as prayer?” You mean, reading the passage out loud and reminding God of his promises, or something like that?

Yep… do Catholics do that? or is it more of a evangelical etc thing?

So you were lapsed when you married? So was I. It’s been 20 years since I reverted but no sign of my husband coming back yet…Still praying for God to show him the way home…

Actually no, I was never baptised as a baby and discovered faith for the first time shortly after I met my now husband. We got married in 2007 and I got baptised, and entered the Catholic church the following year.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

This is a nice idea but at the moment with 3 little ones I rarely get the quiet time to focus or formulate a real prayer, and would do much better for now with something that is pre-set but solid.

Yep… do Catholics do that? or is it more of a evangelical etc thing?

Actually no, I was never baptised as a baby and discovered faith for the first time shortly after I met my now husband. We got married in 2007 and I got baptised, and entered the Catholic church the following year.

Okay, a lot of people pray the Memorare to Mary: It’s not hard to memorize.

Remember, o most loving Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who ever had recourse to your protection, implored your help, or sought your intercession, was left forsaken. Filled therefore with confidence in your goodness, I fly to you, O Mother, Virgin of virgins. To you I come, before you I stand, a sorrowful sinner. Despise not my poor words, O Mother of the Word of God, but graciously hear and grant my prayer.

Or just say the Our Father and Hail Mary. Could you do a decade of a rosary at a time?

The praying scripture sounds more evangelical to me than Catholic. We read our Bibles, and meditate on the scripture, and pray for understanding, but if it’s the type of thing the evangelicals tend to do, then no, not so much.

That’s fantastic that you found your faith!! :dancing::extrahappy:

I will add you and especially your husband to my prayers. Did you visit the St. Monica prayer thread at the top of this forum yet? Bunch of fine ladies all praying for their husbands and/or sons to come back or come to the Church…

 

[GraceDK]

I am Catholic and married to a non-believer. I have been realizing just how important it is that I pray for him daily, and to take this seriously, but I want to do more than just a one line prayer each day (and of course I want to pray for others too).

I have a good collection of prayers for an ‘unsaved’ husband, but they are Christian not Catholic and there have been a few discrepancies. I’m on the search for solid Catholic prayers to pray for him, preferably covering multiple areas such as his role as husband, his role as father, protection from the enemy, for his salvation, for his work and role as provider… If there is nothing then I will just have to rewrite some of them myself, but as I’ve only been a Catholic for about 5 years, my knowledge is not always complete, so I am looking for guidance.

Also, while I’m on the topic, what is the Catholic opinion on praying scripture as prayer?

First, please understand that a Catholic is a Christian. However did you get the impression that you are not a Christian?
On my continent those who are anti-Catholic will say to the Catholics; “you are not really Christians”.
Its sad for me to see American Catholics are seeminly agreeing with this statement. I wonder though… if you are not Christian, how will you enter heaven. The early Christians were Catholic Christians, and they called themselves Christians. It says so in the Bible.
Please don’t let anyone tell you that you are not a Christian.
The birthright of any serious Catholic is the name “Christian”. It belongs to the Catholic Church most of all.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

First, please understand that a Catholic is a Christian. However did you get the impression that you are not a Christian?
On my continent those who are anti-Catholic will say to the Catholics; “you are not really Christians”.
Its sad for me to see American Catholics are seeminly agreeing with this statement. I wonder though… if you are not Christian, how will you enter heaven. The early Christians were Catholic Christians, and they called themselves Christians. It says so in the Bible.
Please don’t let anyone tell you that you are not a Christian.
The birthright of any serious Catholic is the name “Christian”. It belongs to the Catholic Church most of all.

If I may assume, I think she means they are “only” Christian and not Catholic in focus. Most Catholics know that we are Christians, in fact, the original Christians! And most of us correct those in our “real” lives (away from the forum) who seem to have the idea that Catholics are not Christian.

When I speak of a book that is written from a Christian perspective, I just add that it isn’t Catholic in focus, but it is Christian.

 

[SurlyMermaid]

Our mommy’s group went through Omartian’s Power of a Praying Wife. I haven’t finished it, but the writer really went through it with her hubby. She really knows whereof she speaks! I can really relate to her.

My husband is a cradle Catholic and hadn’t been to church in forever (he and family are very lapsed. Oddly, I was an atheist/Buddhist when we met. I’m doing RCIA in the fall after looking into his family’s traditional faith.

This is a very helpful thread!

 

[catholicanne]

These are very good suggestions. My husband believes everything I do except he just won’t call himself Catholic, he says he’s Agnostic. Fine, I simply let him be and just pray for him. He attends church with me, attended all my RCIA classes with me, and supports raising any future children we will have as Catholic. Only God can bring someone to Him, I’ll just pray and wait.

 

[starrball]

The praying scripture sounds more evangelical to me than Catholic. We read our Bibles, and meditate on the scripture, and pray for understanding, but if it’s the type of thing the evangelicals tend to do, then no, not so much.

That’s fantastic that you found your faith!! :dancing::extrahappy:

I will add you and especially your husband to my prayers. Did you visit the St. Monica prayer thread at the top of this forum yet? Bunch of fine ladies all praying for their husbands and/or sons to come back or come to the Church…

I’m trying to pray a daily rosary along with a cd. It’s not perfect and I’m usually tidying up the kitchen etc at the same time, but I know it’s still good for me

The set of prayers I have been using has both a scripture verse and then a corresponding prayer. I actually really like it, it shows the prayers are based on God’s word - as opposed to say my selfish desires.

Here is an example:

Ephesians 5:25, 28: Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

Prayer: Father God, help __________ to love me as You call all husbands to love their wives, as Christ loved the church, and gave Himself up for her. Help him to see that we are better together, working in unity, under Christ, to care for each other and our children. And help me to love him as Christ loved the church.

Is there anything wrong with this?

I will check out the St Monica thread.

 

[cradlecatholic5]

he says he’s Agnostic. Fine, I simply let him be and just pray for him

that’s just what my husband said and what I did.

I will keep all in prayers. The power of prayer is amazing!

 

[Buck_Crosswhite]

Prayers just after communion are the most efficacious.

The rosary is “the weapon.”

Sometimes God waits until just before a person’s death to convert them so they don’t have time to lose their soul.

 

[HonoraDominum]

My husband is Catholic but only in Name. I turn my whole day into a pray.

“Dear Lord, I offer up my whole day, my works joys and suffering for the reparation of sin, the salvation of souls, especially my family.”

I try to exercise daily and offer that as well when my lungs start to hurt and feel like quitting. I sometimes, offer my actions while cleaning, washing dishes or sweeping the floor. I offer my rosary as will. I bind my family’s hearts to the Immaculate Heart of Mary.

I will be praying for you as well and all the other women who’s husbands are non-believing.

The Morning Offering and Rosary suggestion are fantastic!

I have a blessed Green Scapular in our bedroom, and I pray “Immaculate heart of Mary, pray for us now and at the hour of our death. I pray for my husband’s conversion.” I have confidence that Mary will answer my prayers for conversion as long as I persevere.

 

[Stitchwort]

Also, while I’m on the topic, what is the Catholic opinion on praying scripture as prayer?

I’m not exactly sure what you–or the other posters who have commented on this question–mean by “praying scripture as prayer”, but these points occur to me:

1. Our greatest Catholic prayer is the Mass, and many parts of it are direct quotes from Scripture. Not only the readings and psalms, but many other lines. The one that comes to mind right now is the prayer we say just before going for Communion “Lord, I am not worthy that you should come under my roof . . .” – one of the sections which was changed in the recent new translation of the Mass, precisely to make it closer to the scriptural passage from which it comes (as it is in the Latin standard from which the translation was made.)
2. The Liturgy of the Hours is the other official prayer of the Church, and it is composed mostly of Bible passages–psalms, scripture verses and the Old and New Testament canticles. All priests and most religious are obligated to pray it daily, and many lay people do so as well. This is certainly using scripture as prayer.

3.* Lectio divino* is a particular way of prayerfully reading scripture. It has been around since long before the Protestant reformation and is still used today in monasteries and by others.

So absolutely, Catholics use scripture as prayer. I think the difference lies in the way we approach scripture and our understanding of its place in the Church, as compared to the Protestant Sola Scriptura and private individual interpretation. Dei verbum gives an excellent outline of the Catholic position.

This might have been better as a separate thread. It is a bit of a drift from your main question.

 

[starrball]

Prayers just after communion are the most efficacious.

The rosary is “the weapon.”

Sometimes God waits until just before a person’s death to convert them so they don’t have time to lose their soul.

This is helpful information.

Also, I know God sometimes waits till the end, that’s what happened with my dad, but I never thought of that reason!

 

[starrball]

I’m not exactly sure what you–or the other posters who have commented on this question–mean by “praying scripture as prayer”, but these points occur to me:

1. Our greatest Catholic prayer is the Mass, and many parts of it are direct quotes from Scripture. Not only the readings and psalms, but many other lines. The one that comes to mind right now is the prayer we say just before going for Communion “Lord, I am not worthy that you should come under my roof . . .” – one of the sections which was changed in the recent new translation of the Mass, precisely to make it closer to the scriptural passage from which it comes (as it is in the Latin standard from which the translation was made.)
2. The Liturgy of the Hours is the other official prayer of the Church, and it is composed mostly of Bible passages–psalms, scripture verses and the Old and New Testament canticles. All priests and most religious are obligated to pray it daily, and many lay people do so as well. This is certainly using scripture as prayer.

3.* Lectio divino* is a particular way of prayerfully reading scripture. It has been around since long before the Protestant reformation and is still used today in monasteries and by others.

So absolutely, Catholics use scripture as prayer. I think the difference lies in the way we approach scripture and our understanding of its place in the Church, as compared to the Protestant Sola Scriptura and private individual interpretation. Dei verbum gives an excellent outline of the Catholic position.

This might have been better as a separate thread. It is a bit of a drift from your main question.

Hi mom!

I gave an example back on page 1. I meant praying the exact scripture quote as a prayer itself, which is a bit different. For example ’ husbands love your wives just as Christ loved the church’ and just saying that - as a prayer for my husband for example. But the prayers I use have both a scripture and a corresponding prayer. I think it’s really nice and especially good for me because while the Protestant focus is only on the scripture etc, that is the area where I am weakest, so for me I think ultimately it’s a good thing, even if it’s a bit of a protestant notion.

 

[Stitchwort]

praying the exact scripture quote as a prayer itself, which is a bit different. For example ’ husbands love your wives just as Christ loved the church’ and just saying that - as a prayer for my husband for example. But the prayers I use have both a scripture and a corresponding prayer. I think it’s really nice and especially good for me because while the Protestant focus is only on the scripture etc, that is the area where I am weakest, so for me I think ultimately it’s a good thing, even if it’s a bit of a protestant notion.

Hi, daughter!

Well, we all pray the Our Father, and that is a direct scripture quote. So are the first two sentences of the Hail Mary. So are the psalms of the Liturgy of the Hours. Many are petitions for assorted universal human needs.

Reading a scripture passage and drawing from it a brief meditation/prayer is a very Catholic practice. Magazines such as The Word Among Us give a set of guided meditations and prayer for every day of the month. I see no problem with taking a particularly relevant scripture passage and turning it directly into a prayer.

The caution is to “read Scripture with the mind of the Church” and understand it in the context of all the Church teaches, as opposed to treating it as the ONLY guide we have and interpreting it “our” way.

It takes time and effort to get a thorough working knowledge of Scripture. I certainly didn’t have it at your age, and I didn’t have the distractions and obligations you have! Guided meditations can be helpful, especially when you’re just starting out. Just remember that the commentary doesn’t have the same weight of authority as the scripture passage!