At the core I believe the issue for most Protestants comes down to a misunderstanding, as already alluded to, of prayer and worship.
For most Protestants, myself included before I was introduced to the Lord Jesus’s friends and family in the communion of the saints in the Catholic Church, prayer is ONLY addressed to God. Thus every prayer is a sort of act of worship, that is, of adoration of the one to whom the prayer is addressed. So it goes that prayer cannot be addressed to any saint, alive or “dead”.
Yes, you are wondering, well, then, what about asking a friend to pray for you. Well, in their eyes, “asking a friend” is not “prayer”. Because at some time in history, “prayer” as in “pray ye” the “request” became an act of adoration in their minds, an act of “latria” reserved to God.
How did this come about? Well, first and foremost because of a collapse of doctrine, a deflation of belief in the real and true Church. And without a full and complete faith in the promises of Christ in handing the keys of the kingdom to St Peter, and the authority to loose and bind to the Church, well, it only follows that there would be a loss of connection, a loss of “communion of the saints”. Indeed, the Apostles Creed means less and less with the passing of every generation of schismatics.
For us in the Church, it is of course different. We see the saints in heaven as our true friends who have gone before us. Thus we ask them for help and we ask them to pray for us, just as those who went to Mary at Cana for assistance and just as I ask my wife to pray for me here and now. It really IS that simple. They, the saints in heaven, due to their real proximity to God in Glory can pray for us in ways we cannot pray for ourselves.
Now there is one other issue for those who reject prayer to the saints in heaven.
That is, “How do we know they ARE in heaven?”
That is also simple.
We know by the authority Christ gave the Church and the process by which that authority is exercised by the Church. The Church does not officially declare any “damned” and few overall sainted, but some She does declare to be at the throne of our Lord in heaven. We SEE them in the vision of St John in Revelation, crying for the blood of the martyrs, presenting our case before God Himself. What a mystery! What a blessed mystery!
Did the Church “make them saints”? Well no. The Church does however declare them to be saints. The Church grants that stamp of understanding to all that these are ones who truly have gone forth in full faith in our Lord Jesus and His work. and why SHOULDN’T the Church be aware of them and able to declare to us who some of them are? And so we find them examples, not perfect here but perfected there. Caring for us and in the presence of God. And so we ask for the prayers of our friends on earth and our friends in heaven.
Indeed, why should we ask a friend on earth who has yet to prove his faith before God to pray for us? Doesn’t THAT seem less safe than praying for one who has demonstrated faith to the end?
God is not the God of the dead, but of the living.
Praised be that God.