Pregnant again, depressed, hyperemesis again

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annabeth

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Ok so a little history. Me and Dh tried amny years to have children 8 years and finally had our first 5 1/2 years ago , 11 months later had another and 4 years later another. No birth control ever. We said we would accept what the Lord has in store for us. The NFp does not work sicne I have very irregular periods. With each pregnancy I have had hyperememsis the last being the worst. Abe is now months and I just found out that I am pregnant only because I was starting to feel really nauseated. With him it was so bad I was in and out of the hospital and since I had him I had post partum depression and health issues, financial issues and alot of stress. I kept going back and forth weather to use birth control but I just couldnt and Dh was opposed. SO now I am who knows how far along mabey 2 months, miserably nauseated although not puking my guts up only in the morning but the nausea is relentless.It is hard to drink fluids. I am depressed because I was not ready althought it is a blessing. My family who has never liked Dh is going to have major opinions. I told my cousin and he thinks I am turining into Michelle Duggar. Although I know GOD will make a way and I have to acept it and suffer through it how can I not be bothered by the comments awaiting? Thank GOD they live out of town.
I am really down and am scared to keep getting pregnant.
 
Firstly I’ll say some prayers for you, it sounds like you could use them. But know that you are blessed! A baby is a blessing and never a burden. God will not give you what you cannot handle.

And if it were me, I would take being compared to the Duggars as a compliment. While not Catholic, it seems to me like they have a great sense of family and are at least in the right mindset that children are a blessing and have God at the center of their life.

I am glad you decided not to use birth control as we all know the Church’s stance on it. I have no other help with that but probably others will.
 
I’m sorry to hear about your problems and will pray for you.

Since you say NFP is ineffective may I suggest something else that might help?

It’s part of the Pope Paul VI isntitute, it’s called “naprotechnology” and on their site it says they can help with a lot of problems with reproduction including Post partum depression like you say you have so I hope you can find some info there and perhaps a doctor you can talk to about it:

naprotechnology.com/
 
I am so sorry you are feeling bad. With my first child I had trouble keeping anything down. I lost 11 lbs and I was very thin to begin with. I was so miserable the entire pregnancy. I swelled up like a balloon. My heart started beating fast. My blood pressure went up. My sisters said that one day I would forget all that and only think about the baby. I haven’t forgotten what I went through with having my babies. I almost died having the second one.
However, all the pain and nausea seem miniscule when I look into the face of my children.

Every night I try to think of a moment spent with my children that made me smile. Maybe you can do something like that too.

Also, when you feel like you are at the end of your rope, you might say, “Jesus I trust in You” and think about trusting Jesus with you all your problems. I always feel better when I do this.

May God bless you. I will say a prayer for you.
 
First, Congratulations! Truly, a baby is such a blessing and you are doing the work of the Lord.

Second, I think if I read correctly, this is baby #4? I hardly think that puts you at Duggar status, and even if it did, why in the world would people feel the need to comment on your reproductive activities. I would seriously come up with a line you feel comfortable saying when people make rude comments. Something like “Well, we really enjoy making them” or “Why do you feel the need to comment on personal decisions that are between my DH and myself?”

Finally, take a look into NFP, specifically the Creighton model. NFP can certainly work with irregular periods, because fertility is determined on a day by day basis, no matter how irregular the month is overall. Secondly, a doctor trained in Naprotechnology may have some excellent suggestions for dealing with PPD.

Congrats again, and good luck.
 
Prayers as you welcome a new child.

NFP does not rely on regular periods, perhaps you are using an old-fashioned calendar method? Please, learn one of the “new” methods.

A search will find you information Billings, Creighton, Marquette - talk to instructors and find what will work best with your marriage and your body.
 
I agree with the other posters - please look into the more modern methods of NFP - they do not rely on regular periods. I use the sympto-thermal method (8 1/2 years and counting) and have NEVER had regular periods. There IS hope in NFP - but it does require diligent use and continuing education - I read as much NFP material as possible to stay as up-to-date on the subject as I can.

May God bless you through your pregnancy - and bring you peace. Congratulations. 🙂
 
Congratulations on your new pregnancy. Babies are truly a blessing from the Lord. I can imagine though how scared and out-of-sorts you must be feeling now with a very little one and all the nasuea. Please allow yourself to get plenty of rest. Do not worry about housecleaning or even cooking. The children will be fine with just sandwiches, cereal, and fruit. Your dh can quickly grill something outside when he gets home for his dinner.

Please get a copy of Fertility, Cycle, and Nutrition. It is extremely helpful and natural way to improve your cycles to make NFP and fertility easier. I have also recently heard about a book on hyperemesis written by a Catholic woman. I read about it on Dawn Eden’s website.
 
Tripple ditto the Creighton method, if you haven’t already studied it. Wonder if the Couple to Couple League would be able to help as well (seeing as different methods work better for different people)?

It sounds like your pregnancies are really difficult. God bless you for welcoming your babies anyway. Prayers for a healthy and improved pregnancy.
 
And wow, the Michelle Duggar comments, I’m thinking those are meant as non-compliments, no? Geez, how obnoxious, especially considering the fact that you struggled so long to get pg. the first time. I guess you can come up with a reply like, “oh gee thanks! No, I don’t think I’ll ever be blessed with that many children, but she sure is a generous mother. God bless her!”
 
Thank you guys so much for your support. I think my family is so neg. because we are struggling with our business and financially at the same time losing our home so they are going to say alot about it alothough I shouldnt care but it makes it hard to be surrounded with such neg people all of the time. It seems like concern but it is always geared towards our style of licing. Although most of my family is Catholic no one practices.
 
I agree with the other posters. 🙂

Congratulations, and I suggest you join in on the Pregnant Moms thread in the Parenting subsection…there is lots of support there from other pregnant moms. 👍

Praying for you and your family. :crossrc: :hug1:
 
I dont think the church or God wants you to keep having children if it is unhealthy for you to do so. From a health prospective I would question things. Health includes your mental health as well. Depression is a serious issue. Consider antidepression medication to get you through. Also you may want to get into a support group. Your personnel beliefs on birth control need to be discussed with your husband. You and him need to sit down and discuss the real issues you are facing with raising this many children. Sometimes men do not see how much work children place on a women. Men will often just leave it to the women. Not healthy. If you choice to continue to have children you need more help from others. It is clear from your post that you are on the edge of break down. It is easier to catch a break down before it occurs than to try and bring the person back after they have gone that far. Also your personal feelings on how many children you have with you husband is no one elses business. If your family does not like him that is their problem. He is your husband first. Your husband however needs to stand up as a man and realize that this many pregnancy’s maybe to much. Maybe you need a doctor’s help to get you cycles back on track so natural birth control is a more reliable option.
 
Congrats on baby #4

I to have had PPD after my 2nd and 3rd I did take anti depresent drugs after baby #3 but when I got pg agian I decided to try vit D3 witch your doctor can test you for a difency however the D3 dose not have the side effects that the other drugs can have so I felt that it would be safer. I have countinued on the D3 even after my MC and it has worked better then my Zoloft.

I have also heard about vit B shots for the morning sicknes you might want to talk to your Dr about that as well.

I do agree with the other posters that NFP can work for you I use the symto thermo methed and have been able to tell when i was able to and not to get pg even when I was nursing whtch led to very crazy clcles.

I will keep you in my prayers and hope that your family will see this as another bleesing that it is, and that you will have some upswing in all areas of your life.
 
Personally I would baptise the baby inside the womb, ie baptise your bump but don’t tell the priest. You need to pour water over your bump three times and say I baptise you and full name (but don’t worry if you haven’t the name yet) in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. It might take away some of the pains that you are experiencing but not all. Worth a try. Also go to mass more often during pregnancy as you’re eating for two, and also try confession.
 
Congrats on baby #4! That’s wonderful!

For the nausea - have you tried medicaiton like Zofran? I’m not to the point you describe, but I actually lost weight at my last well-preggo check & she asked why I wasn’t eating.

I also strongly encourage you & your husband to learn the Creighton Model for NFP. Dr. Hilgers will work w/ you personally if you have issues as well. PPD & the hyperemesis may be ‘curable’ if you get the right doctor!

I pray for you & your family through this difficult time. Good luck!
 
pray for me to be able to have theenergy to go o mass more and confession.
 
Personally I would baptise the baby inside the womb, ie baptise your bump but don’t tell the priest. You need to pour water over your bump three times and say I baptise you and full name (but don’t worry if you haven’t the name yet) in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. It might take away some of the pains that you are experiencing but not all. Worth a try. Also go to mass more often during pregnancy as you’re eating for two, and also try confession.
Surely this cannot be licit?
 
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