Pregnant daughter

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Lauerica1

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I have a bit of a dilemma/question. My daughter is pregnant and in an relationship but not married meaning living with the father of her child. I am married through the church but not to her father. She would like me to be in the room while going through labor and my husband is very against that. He thinks I should not be there until she is ready to deliver to give my daughter and her boyfriend time to bond and my husband thinks I will be interfering. We are at odds on this. I feel stuck between the two my daughter and my husband. Any advice?
 
I’m confused…a little?

You could tell your daughter that you would come in when she’s about to deliver so she would have time with her boyfriend. I don’t really know why she would be against that. But if she wants you to be there (I’m guessing labour is terrifying and it would be a lot more comforting to have someone that had gone through it), you could tell your husband that. Maybe then you could leave your daughter alone with the father to bond after she delivered.

Then again I’m single and my advice should never be taken as gospel
 
Or you could be with her during labor for a while, you know, negotiate?
 
I’d say be there. I was in her boyfriend’s position when I was Protestant. Just be sure he’s okay with it.
 
Your daughter needs support, now more than ever. If she is going to give birth to your grandchild, then you owe it to her as her mother to be there for her.
 
To be fair fathers being present at the birth of their children is a pretty recent thing. It’s not unreasonable for her to want her mother.
 
It is an amazing time.

Congratulations regarding your future grandchild.

Sometimes it’s a good time to trust your husband.
He does have a point.
But discuss it first with the baby’s father as well as your daughter.
If the child’s father wants you there to support your daughter, then it would be best for him and your daughter to tell your husband themselves.

At the same time be very careful to stand back or leave soon after the baby is born because the father and the mother are the most important people in the room, aside from the baby.
Plenty of time after the parents have their time, for you to be proud grandmother.
A time to leave the room after the birth, the baby, the mother, the father’s time.
You can return when they ask you too, but the father comes first, and the one who should hold the baby first after the mother.
ConfusedLucy said:
fathers being present at the birth of their children is a pretty recent thing
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Dear Lucy, recent in terms of centuries, but still fifty years, a decent period of time, that fathers have been known to be present, at least in my country.
 
Hi Lea. No my daughter is not against me being in delivery room. It is my husband who is not her father that was a little against me being there the whole time. Thank you for your advice.
 
Thank you Michael. I have asked my daughter several times to make sure it’s ok with her and her boyfriend. She is telling me it’s ok.
 
I don’t think your daughter will appreciate her stepfathers interference in this matter to be honest.
 
Yes Lucy I unfortunately have to agree. He and i have talked and I think we have finally come to an agreement.
 
Lauerica1 said:
I have a bit of a dilemma/question. My daughter is pregnant and in an relationship but not married meaning living with the father of her child. I am married through the church but not to her father. She would like me to be in the room while going through labor and my husband is very against that. He thinks I should not be there until she is ready to deliver to give my daughter and her boyfriend time to bond and my husband thinks I will be interfering. We are at odds on this. I feel stuck between the two my daughter and my husband. Any advice?
Click to expand...
They live together and they haven’t bonded?
 
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