Hope you don’t take it the wrong way, but what wouldn’t I give to be feeling everything you’re feeling right now.
Okay, I didn’t take it the wrong way. At all.
Since you all have been so supporttive, let me post the link to a prayer request I made last month.
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=311126
That’s my story. I wrote it in third person because I was ashamed.
I was officially diagnosed as infertile with PCOS, so I
do know. It took about six years of trying. Finally, I just went to the basilica of the Immaculate Conception here in DC and took a day of personal retreat there. My only prayer was the word, “Baby?”
And I don’t have answers as to how this happened. I don’t know why. As I said before, I know I shouldn’t complain, but now I think I understand why I didn’t conceive sooner: I simply wasn’t ready for it.
Also, the catechism didn’t help when it told me to unite my sufferings to Christ on the Cross. “Pshaw,” I thought. The CCC didn’t know what it was talking about! But, in being patient with myself and with God, it happened. And right NOW my words may mean nothing to you…because more than 15 weeks ago, anyone who encouraged
me got the immediate dust-off.
But I did find one thing that helped, unfortunately it wasn’t from Scripture.
Check this out:
Every woman is a mother when she:
folds her hands in prayer for a child.
feeds one when he’s hungry,
clothes him when he’s cold,
or holds him when he’s scared.
Every woman is a mother when she:
Listens to his hopes and dreams,
and tells him the world needs who he is.
Every woman is a mother when she:
Smiles as a child walks by,
or cries when she knows just one
child is crying somewhere in the world.
The conception for this woman becoming a mother
takes place in her heart,
and the delivery comes through her hands.
Every woman carries the ability and power to
change the world one child at a time.
This birth is not measured in months,
but spans her lifetime.
Every woman is a mother when
she makes a difference in just one child.
copyright 1999 Janice Asien LaRosa
Thanks to everyone who has responded. I never, ever meant to sound ungrateful. However, it’s true that one has to be careful when asking God for something. If you pray for patience, He won’t just sprinkle “patience dust” on you. He’ll give you the means to
grow patience through exercises and obstacles. I think that’s whata happened here: I didn’t just get a baby, but am going through a lot of sacrefice to birth one. And this was more than I expected (but, knowing how God works, shouldn’t I have guessed? Haha, foolish mortal, me!)
Muzhik, you were spot-on when you said,
Likewise, we might not be thinking about what we eat – the food is just there. We don’t even have to experience the loss of food, though, just the possibility that the food won’t be there, and suddenly we are consumed not with hunger but with a desire to possess, to consume.
It’s a triple spiritual hunger for women who are not able to conceive.
- One can actually mourn the loss of something intangible they didn’t know they had, though it was not necessarily taken for granted.
- Some women who haven’t any children (yet) hurt so deeply and wonder why they may have done to have God’s grace lifted from them, especially fundamentalist circles. (I got that one firsthand from a former roommate.)
- Finally, they suffer the most deeply in the Catholic Culture which cherishes life. Sometimes a woman can feel as if all of her worth as a wife and a woman is hinged on her ability to reproduce.
On to happier things: I’ve already been “tummy groped” no less than tree times in the past week! When I asked a lady if she had children, she had
that pained lookon her face which immediately registered as “no, but we’ve been trying for what seems to be forever…” so I held her hands on my tummy for a few minutes longer. If there was a way I could share this child with her, a stranger, I would!
As far as the ginger goes, it’s my BFF. Ground, shredded, chopped, boiled…after the stinging in my esophagus stops, i’m good to go for about an hour. And now, the funny thing is, I feel like a turtle on its back when I try to get up. I have to ROLL! No more sit-ups!
I love you all, and I rarely say that in a public forum. I will be going to the shrine this weekend and light candles for each of your special intentions. How suddenly God sent you here to support little unworthy me. Thank you all.
Oh, before I forget, we should know the baby’s sex next Wednesday, I’ll post immediately after the ultrasound!
. Since I am laid off I listen to alot of Catholic Radio. Greg and Mary Popcack have show called Heart, Mind and Strentgh and a web page