Prescription addiction?

[Whitacre_Girl]

We are all taught from a very young age that addiction is wrong – very wrong. This isn’t just for street drugs or alcohol, but also for prescription drugs.

I am facing a dilemma that I have thought seriously about going to a priest for, but I don’t want to waste his time with my stupid whacked out moral compass. I think that people here might be able to help. Maybe.

Here’s the backstory. I was diagnosed with PTSD some years ago, and after trying to lick it with meditation, prayer, and thought replacement, it failed miserably. I found myself on the edge of suicide for the second time in two years and I knew my dearest husband couldn’t handle seeing me like that anymore. Resolved not to hurt him anymore, I took my therapist’s advice and got on a mild mood stabilizer/anti-depressant. They started me on the lowest possible dose of one of the most mild forms out there. By the end of the 6 weeks dosing, I had my life back! I am the same old me, and the past is just that now – the past! I am loving God, I am loving my husband, and I am loving life. Hubby and I have have spent a lot of time repairing the damage done by the PTSD and have such great communication and understanding now, and I can’t wait to nurture that and watch it grow. We have only just started the healing, and I know we have further to go, but we are so totally into each other now, and we can watch the trust and intimacy grow before our very eyes and find so much joy in that and each other!

My counsellor and doctor tells me, based on my success, that the PTSD was related solely to the trauma, and not genetic factors (such as depression or bipolar disorder which runs in the family) and that after just a year or two I can go off the medication as my brain should have sorted itself out and stopped over-producing stress hormones and start making enough seratonin.

Here is my dilemma, and why I was so hesitatant to get on the pills in the first place. The pills are addictive, as are all anti-depressants. If I go off of them now, before my brain has reordered itself I am a suicide risk because my brain will go haywire (this bothers me, but it keeps me on the pills) but more than that, if and when I do go off of them, I will go through withdrawl because my body has become dependant on them. Scripture tells us to be mastered by nothing, and while even as I type this I know how silly I am being, I cannot shake the feeling that Christ isn’t being all that I need. I need him plus these stupid pills to be who I really am.

Let me reiterate, nothing but good things has come from taking these pills. But I am scared that I have an addiction, and I am the type of person who refuses to be mastered by anything other than my God and my Love – Jesus Christ. (oh, and my husband of course! haha) I get no pleasure from taking these pills as there is no high associated with them, the only joy I get is that it has chained that beast within me, and through the help of God, allowed me to beat it into submission and banish it from my life. I can’t tell you how good it feels to be free…but then I worry about addiction.

 

[slywakka250]

you didn’t mention what drugs you are taking. I take 40 mg/day of Celexa(an SSRI anti-depressant) plus ativan on some days as needed for anxiety.

I was very hesitant to start perscription pills as well, BUT drugs were the ONLY thing that has done anything whatsoever to help my anxiety problems. You say in your post that the drugs are working for you, and you have your life back. that’s great. I understand that you don’t want to be dependent on them, but I just want to warn you, that you just be very cautious in stopping the pills!! I thought I was all better after being on mine for a 2 years. I stopped. and after 6 months I had the worst anxiety of my life! i was unable to leave the house for days. I made it to the doctor, and told him how I used to be on anti-depressant. my doctor said, why did you stop taking your pill? you clearly need to go back on it. I have since been back on it, and realize all the more that I’ll probably have to take something the rest of my life .

 

[Whitacre_Girl]

you didn’t mention what drugs you are taking. I take 40 mg/day of Celexa(an SSRI anti-depressant) plus ativan on some days as needed for anxiety.

I was very hesitant to start perscription pills as well, BUT drugs were the ONLY thing that has done anything whatsoever to help my anxiety problems. You say in your post that the drugs are working for you, and you have your life back. that’s great. I understand that you don’t want to be dependent on them, but I just want to warn you, that you just be very cautious in stopping the pills!! I thought I was all better after being on mine for a 2 years. I stopped. and after 6 months I had the worst anxiety of my life! i was unable to leave the house for days. I made it to the doctor, and told him how I used to be on anti-depressant. my doctor said, why did you stop taking your pill? you clearly need to go back on it. I have since been back on it, and realize all the more that I’ll probably have to take something the rest of my life .

Oh no! I’m sorry I should have been more clear: I have not stopped taking my medication at all. I follow doc’s orders! haha

I have only been on it for about 6 months, and it has been life changing. really! But I still have that small nagging voice.

I am taking a generic form of celexa. 20 mg once a day. They started me on it with that doseage, expecting to have to add to it later, but so far I have neededno adjustment.

 

[autdrew]

There is a difference between an addiction and a dependence. You can become dependent on a medication because it is doing what it is supposed to do. For example, a diabetic is dependent on their insulin because without it, their bodies would not function properly. All the praying in the world probably would never change that fact.
An addiction is something that you have to have, cant live without, would go to any length to obtain, including committing fraud or crime. It involves abusing a medication and then craving more to satisfy the withdrawal. Your life starts to revolve around getting your drug, using your drug, being high & coming back down to start the cycle all over again. Antidepressants dont generally cause this type of addiction, there are some anti anxiety drugs that can, Valium comes to mind.
Rather than feeling like Jesus wasnt enough for you, how about thinking that Jesus heard your prayers & lead you to some help you need? God gave us the gift of medicine to help us through tough times or when our bodies are not able to function normally. There is nothing wrong with taking medications when you need it, as long as you dont slip into the cycle of abuse & addiction. It sounds like you a vigilant & you have a good doctor who will taper you off when the time is right. It is a long, slow process & the withdrawal symptoms are usually negligible. Good luck!

 

[Fae76]

I’m so glad your meds are working for you!

Let me assure you that pure anti-depressants are not addictive. I prescribe them daily and take them myself. What can happen when you stop taking them is that you can feel anxiety, sleep problems and such, generally the same side effects you can get when you start the medication.

Those side effects will be milder or not occur at all if you and your doc wean yourself off of the medication. That has nothing to do with addiction but with how the receptors in your body react - you can’t stop at once with blood pressure meds for example, and no one would call them addictive