Pressured into c-section?

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Agreed. We just need to be realistic in how we articulate those risks and benefits. It’s not always as objective as it should be; a lot of bias can color those “information” consults.
 
halogirl said:
Yep this is what I want to avoid. I cannot cope with the idea of that much pain, simple as. And the fear of the unknown as another post said it can be going fine then really not in a very short space of time. After the last couple of years I need some control back
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Pregnancy and childbirth can teach us a lot about control (or lack thereof) and giving it up. I think that’s why God sent me a baby at 45. I was so picky - I’d had 5 babies and 5 Obstetricians. Always searching for the perfect one, who would let me try a vbac after 2 c-sections, one who agreed with my philosophes, etc. I finally found her. For my 6th pregnancy, I chose the same OB as I’d had for my 5th. Even though I was resigned to a scheduled c-section, I felt like this doctor really listened to me and didn’t unduly pressure me. At 45 years old with gestational diabetes and 4 previous c-sections, I was considered a bit risky.

My doctor unexpectedly retired when I was 32 weeks pregnant. I was scheduled to start twice weekly non-stress tests that week. Nobody wanted to take me on. I called my insurance company for help and they gave me a couple of names. I finally found someone to take me. I chose blindly. I had to switch hospitals. I was not in control. Hands down, it was the best birth experience. Even better than my vbac, which I had fought so hard for. The doctor was laid-back, communicative, the nurses loved him, his philosophies aligned well with mine. He didn’t pressure me to have my tubes tied (he asked one, wrote it in my chart, and it never came up again.)

The bottom line, after all these years of trying to have babies the “perfect” way, is that I have peace. Peace that eluded me after 4 c-sections and 1 vbac. Peace that never came as I labored for 25 hours at home before transferring to the hospital for my second c-section. Peace that I sought, even after my carefully chosen OB told me that my baby had a ear presentation. Peace that eluded me as I cried on my way to my first scheduled c-section. Finally, I gave up the idea that I could control this stuff! It was truly life-changing for me.
 
What I mean is that a lack of control in other areas of my life has really worn me down. Two major bereavements almost back to back - so I feel like this at least needs to be something I can have a say in. I don’t do ‘perfect’ or even look for it I am just looking for what it best for my mental health so I can be a good parent because that in itself will be a rollercoaster and kids aren’t predictable
 
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heidi_storage said:
That number isn’t evidence based,
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It is risky for you to said that from a statement from an international organization of this weight.
heidi_storage said:
nor is it current. About 19% seems to be best, according to this study:
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I am aware of this study. But it is only a study compared to international standard.
heidi_storage said:
Also, as I pointed out earlier, even purely elective cesarean deliveries may prevent some surgeries later in life, for incontinence, prolapse, and fistula.
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Sorry, but you tried maybe without notice it to frighten women with only one point. More, pregnancy alone with a caesaran can weaken the pelvic floor, and many others things can increase the risk such as menaupose, carrying repeatidly heavy burden, hysterectomy etc. Pelvic floor can also be readucated to prevent or limited the dammages.

The consensus is that for a woman and a child in normal conditions, cesarean births are much more risky for the mother and the child than vaginal births.
That’s why (we doesn’t all lived in a country where elective caesarian exists), in France, a caesarian can only happened on the initiative on the obstetrician when it is medically indicated.
 
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I promise you, major abdominal surgery is a lot of pain, they cut through your abdominal muscles and that first time you try to stand up, oh it feels like you have been cut in half! Caring for baby while recovering from major surgery is not a walk in the park.
 
Having a natural birth does not mean that the mother cannot have a say in it!

On the contrary, births plan and active cooperation of the mother is needed, and I am sure often more and more accepted and search, even in the UK.

When we give birth, we cannot control everything. We cannot be sure that it would happened as we want, or would be fine. But we can control our choice and what the medical care would be. How we want to manage it. A lot of options exists from heavy medical things involved pain relief to perfectly physiological, natural births without few to no medical intervention at an hospital or at home.
And in the great majority of times, women give birth witjout any serious complication.

I think that you may benefit from seeing a psychologist with an OB specialization- maybe from your hospital, meeting with women who have had positives birth experiences and seeing the experiences of c section from association of women whi have it, rather than to stay with your fear of loosing self control and some (irrational) fear of births. Births can be difficult, but it is not the experience of everyone.
 
That’s absolutely fine by me. I can do healing pain, just not ‘active pain’. If that makes sense. The idea of literally hours with pain getting worse and worse, then maybe ending up with c section anyway - nope. I will ok for care, other half has extended leave.
 
C section is a done deal. Everyone I know who has an elective has been absolutely fine and advised me to, and some of them had both. I appreciate your (name removed by moderator)ut tho
 
I agree. My husband is currently recover from abdominal surgery, and it is involved a lot of pain, drugs, forbidden of carrying anything, including babies, without to mentionned operative risk.

I feel blessed to not have had caesarian myself.
 
I am not sure to understand what you mean by a “done deal”.

Unless you had already had one, or have new health issue, youare free to change your choice as long as your child is not born yet.
 
I guess I just meant that I’m not going to change my mind. I have spoken to enough folk now to weigh up the ‘bad’ for each type of birth and have decided I’d rather the c section
 
I just want to correct a false idea.

Labor is not just a state of the woman who feel pain go worst and worst for many hours.

In a sense, as te labor progress pain grow, but for the good thing: the delivery.

Pain is not felt the sale by everyone. The more we stay passive, the more we are at risk of being overwelmed with pain. The more we accepted the process of childbirth, we go swimm with the contractions, be active physically and emotionally the more it would be manageable. And if not, a lot of medication, epidural for eg that are choose by the majority of women, can supress or decrease the pain.

I have had one delivery where I do not feel a lot of pain. I have had some painful times but not as if i was overwelmed. It last 8 hours, but i find it so short (what? That’s already done?) that I forget very quickly after the process.
 
I am an extremely anxious even tho physically active person and I panic, so reading up and speaking to professionals I would have a fear response to pain on that level and this could make things longer. Any birth is somewhat unknown, however the c section is the right choice for me 🙂
 
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I find it sad that your professional only encourage in this way.But that’s the consequence to live in a place where elective c section is allowed (not in all countries).

In theory yes, extreme fear can make the things longer, but doesn’t mean impossible. And it is also possible that the fear can be greatly decrease with pain relief and psychological and midwife accompaniment.

You would never know. And one c section influence greatly your future OB history.
 
We are unlikely to have any more. They didn’t really encourage me either way but they very much respected my choice. I’d really rather be done in a procedure and then recover later
 
Thank you 🙂 I am really excited !!! I will let you know how it goes thank you for your support
 
Some women feel excruciating pain. . . . I support your right to give birth in the best manner possible for you; I also support halogirl’s same wish.
 
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