Priest seems cold towards me suddenly

[midwestguy]

Firstly, I apologize if there are many such threads about this topic, or if I'm posting this in the wrong place. Let me know if I need to move it/delete it and I will.

I've been a practicing Catholic for roughly 4 years now after leaving the faith as a young man. I attend a Byzantine church, and I genuinely really like it. I go to church (almost) every week and volunteer when I can. I like the priest and people quite a bit, too.

When I first attended, I was going through a really challenging time in my life, but the priest was very helpful- talking to me, hearing my confessions, meeting with me outside the church, etc. I appreciated it, and was sure to tell him that I was appreciative of him. Recently, a girl I've started dating has started attending the church and was baptized Catholic, which was really exciting for everyone- including the priest.

Anyway, over the past couple months, I've noticed the priest hasn't been nearly as friendly towards me. He seems awkward when I try to talk to him, he doesn't really take the time to talk, and (most troubling) he doesn't ever reply when I ask to go to confession. It's a smaller congregation, so confessions are by appointment. I've been trying to go to confession every month because I always feel like I have things to confess. But lately, he will literally not text me back or call me. It's a little disconcerting, especially because I don't have time to talk to him after church is over most days, since he's a parish priest of a different church in our diocese and leaves right after the liturgy has ended. He did, however, hear my girlfriend's confession yesterday.

I hate thinking this way, but I get the sense he's dodging me and intentionally ignoring me. I feel bad because I'm not sure what I could have done to upset him, if I did anything at all. Like I said, this is within the past few months. We had some miscommunication a couple months ago where I didn't show up to confession because I thought it was a different day, but that's about it. Maybe he's mad because I tend to confess the same 3 sins over and over, but I'm not sure.

Since this is a Byzantine rite church, the priest is married and has kids, so I'm sure he's got his hands full with that. I'm probably just thinking too much into it, but it's starting to really bother me to the point where I don't want to go to church anymore. Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[Nanny1935]

There are many different things that could be going on, I would think neither of them have to do with you having done something wrong (like missing the confession appointment or the repeated content of the confession). It could be the priest is going though a busy time. It could also be that he thinks that you are ready to move on and be more independent of him, especially since you have a girlfriend now that can offer support.

However, there seems to be another issue: you seem to have developed a strong emotional attachment to the priest. This is understandable during a time of crisis. It would also happen with a therapist who was supporting you during that time. In both cases, we need to move on to a more independent state. In the case of the relationship with the priest, more so. A priest can be a spiritual advisor, but he can not be the reason you go to church. You say " but it's starting to really bother me to the point where I don't want to go to church anymore". That is not good. The reason to go to church is your relationship with God.

Perhaps it makes sense to take some time off from contact with him and give him space. Stay focused on your spiritual work, on the volunteer work at church. After a month or so, get back in touch and talk with him about it.