"Priesting" myself?

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I have a permanent confessor. I think that’s the best way as that way he can hear patterns of behavior or remind me if I’m “doing it again”. He’s really tough too, so I think he gives fair penance and also challenges me to do better. He said that he felt bad I felt I had to do all of that, so no more. I will do only what he gives as penance and it’s funny but I feel so much better already. I think just telling him and the other priest what was bothering me answered a lot of questions. They both were confused as to why after each confession I seemed to be getting worse so that answered their questions as well.
 
Irishgal49 said:
I have a permanent confessor. I think that’s the best way as that way he can hear patterns of behavior or remind me if I’m “doing it again”. He’s really tough too, so I think he gives fair penance and also challenges me to do better. He said that he felt bad I felt I had to do all of that, so no more. I will do only what he gives as penance and it’s funny but I feel so much better already. I think just telling him and the other priest what was bothering me answered a lot of questions. They both were confused as to why after each confession I seemed to be getting worse so that answered their questions as well.
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I’m happy for you 😃 Now I just need to go and find myself a permanent confessor 😛
 
Hi,
According to Catechism #1495:
“…must confess…all the unconfessed grave sins…”

If you have doubts about this then talk to a priest again explaining this.
If unconfessed sins were venial, these do not have to be confessed. #1493

Welcome back.
 
MarkThompson said:
Glad to read your comments today. You have my prayer for a fruitful meeting with your priest!
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Dittos.

We used to do a little exercise in catechism class, having the kids (confidentially) write out 3 sins they felt they had committed in the last week. We had them fold them up and collected them. Then, without reading them, I tore up the lot into tiny pieces and threw them in the trash.

“this is what confession is like; destroying our sins” was the lesson.

I suppose today we’d use a shredder. 😃
 
Lorrie,

I think maybe it would help you to make an appointment with a priest (if you want, a different priest) and say the things on that list, and explain to him the situation with your first Confession and what you’ve been doing. Be very honest about everything. Then say everything on your list, but say it simply and quickly, as in… “I lied many times, I gossiped twice, etc” - don’t go into details and explanations unless necessary to explain the nature of the sin.

Also if you go to Confession and you are trying to say a sin that you did many years ago, it is better to explain to the priest that this is what you are doing, and not make it seem like it’s a new sin.

I can’t comment on any of your past confessions, I think you need to speak with a priest on this.

God bless
 
If you need to make a confession that will be unusually long (if you were away from the sacraments for a long time, or you are making a general confession), you should make an appointment outside the regular confession time- and be sure to let the priest know that it’s for a confession that will take awhile. Also, when you go to confession, I suggest you mention all your sins first if there are a lot of them. If you have questions that will take awhile to discuss, go back after you have named them all and ask them.
 
You obviously have a need to bring the items on your list to some closure and I can genuinely understand, from your description of your confession, why you may not “feel” God’s forgiveness and mercy. My suggestion is to contact a priest and make an appointment to meet with him to make your confession. The priest will be able to give you the time you need without having to cut you short. Ultimately, you will need, as others have said, to let go, trust in the mercy of God, accept his forgiveness and pursue his plan for your life. Whatever penance the priest imposes is sufficient in God’s eyes since we can never do anything on our own which will reconcile us to God. Our penance is not an atonement for our sins, but our humility in accepting God’s mercy, rending our hearts and turning back to God.
 
I read about this before… To confess your sins, its those that makes you feel guilty, so when u in the confessional, just speak your heart, speak what bothers you, and be sorry for them. If u cant remember all just say “For sins i might have forgotten”
 
I had a MAJOR spiritual break through, PRAISE GOD!!

I unloaded everything and asked the priest if he had a shredder, the list is history. Then at mass the priest preached the best homily EVER…he talked about saying YES to holiness. I did.

Then a new friend came into my life. She has extraordinary healing gifts and we were all praying over a friend. After everyone left, she turned to me and said, “Are you ready for your healing?” I was stunned but she had her hand on me when we were praying and said that God told her I was in need of healing/deliverance.

After prayers and Scripture reading, I was totally set free…I feel the love of Jesus, His forgiving power, and my total acceptance as being free from the sins that had a hold over me. I am so thankful that when I wanted to “come home” to the Catholic Church God sent me to a church with two wonderful priests and a powerful group of prayer warriors in the congregation.

I’m saying YES to holiness…and when Satan tries to remind me of my past I just tell St Michael to remind him of his FUTURE.

Thanks be to God!!

Lorrie
 
MarkThompson said:
This Sacrament is not My Name Is Earl. You don’t come up with a list of everything you’ve done wrong, carry it around with you, and invent wacky plans for how to atone for them. Period.

If the priest absolved you, then the guilt of your sins has been sacramentally absolved. If he did not give you any penance, then you do not have any penance to do for them – and even if he had given you penance, the absolution of sins is not conditional on performing penance.

If you would like to take up personal penitential practices, this can be a good thing or it can be an unhealthy thing. Find a priest, preferably a regular confessor or spiritual advisor, to talk to about it. Under no circumstances should you just be devising your own penances in this way – as you can now see for yourself from the burnout and difficulties you are experiencing. You should tell the priest about the hard time you are having letting go of the past and feeling comfortable with yourself in God’s mercy.
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I agree with Mark on this. I had to go to confession after an analment was granted, 30 years. I worried about maybe not covering everything. The key is your intention, do you want to make a good confesion? A person can tell by what you wrote, that you intended to do just that. I think that Father knew by that time where your heart was, having spent time writing down your sins so you wouldn’t forget any, anguishing over that list when you wrote it was enough. Now, I’m not sure of the form of your confession, when I go to confession, at the end of it I say “I am sorry for these and all the sins of my past life” you could then say especially for this sin or that sin. Understand, those sins were already forgiven, but if it makes you feel better, do it.
If you make a good confession, then realize you forgot to confess that sin, it was forgiven in that confession because of your intent. Again, you might mention it in your next confession but you wouldn’t need to do that.
 
Irishgal49 said:
I’m needing confession again…as I’m struggling with an addiction. I wish I wasn’t still struggling with this 11 year confession list on top of this addiction, it’s starting to get to be too much and that’s why I can’t seem to focus on what I need to do.

Someone said that I’m “priesting myself” and I would like everyone’s opinion. When I met with a priest for my 11 year confession (I was coming back to the Church) we talked forever and then he said, “Oops I gotta go!” I told him I still had my list (which was 2 pages of stuff I organized by category–maybe 24-25 items as I write really big) and that I hadn’t made my confession. He started the confession and then said, “Well you have it written down…you know what you did wrong…so here, read this.” He handed me a piece of paper and on it was an act of contrition so I read it out loud and he gave me absolution. No penance, no hearing my items on the list or anything. I didn’t want to complain to my home parish priest (he had been on vacation and suggested I find a priest and make my confession) because I’d been out of the Church and didn’t want to look like I was being a pain. I just figured that I better take care of it myself as best I could.

Since then the list has been in my purse and I go over it and slide in a sin here and there when I confess and then I give myself penance for each sin so I can get rid of them. Like for instance, I’m wearing my hair scarfs for 6 months for penance for wearing “sleazy” clothing and I’m trying to read the entire Bible in 3 months for my porn penance. I have crossed off some items but it’s starting to wear on me and I forget things and can’t keep them straight as I have 4 penances going at once. I guess I could joke that “Father Lorrie” is pretty harsh with the penance but I just feel like I want to atone for them. I guess I am being pretty harsh but I want to have this list cleared up in a year. It’s getting discouraging.

I promised someone I would tell a priest and I emailed him tonight but that 11 year list is wearing on me. I know now that one of the items is why I’m fighting this addiction I am struggling with and so the list is growing. Anyway, I am about 1/3 of the way though my list and I’m bummed out because I don’t feel good after confession like other people talk about and I’m running out of ideas for penances and having a bunch of penances going at once is making me crazy. Is that “priesting” myself??? :confused:

Lorrie
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If your priest gave you absolution, as you may not know, all your sins from previous confessions are forgiven, evenn if t hey are not mentioned.

JESUS I ITRUST IN YOU

jr
 
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