Priests Too Busy for Confession?

[Aim4TheMark]

I have recently returned to my Catholic faith and have been going to mass weekly at my local parish. Over they past year, I’ve been becoming closer and closer to my Catholic faith, reading daily on the topic and trying to more strictly adhere to the Church’s teachings. One thing I’ve been severely behind on though is going to confession. The last time I went was about ten years ago, but when I told the priest I was married outside the Church, he told me he wouldn’t hear my confession until I addressed that sin - which I did by having my marriage blessed by the Church later that year. The last time I went to confession before that was when I was a child.

Anyways, since it’s been so long and I possibly have a lot to discuss, I thought I’d make an appointment. I called the parish office, asked to arrange a time for confession, and was told someone would call me back. Later that day the pastor’s secretary called me back and said he was too busy to hear confession, but maybe the associate pastor had time and asked for my email address so he could contact me. That was Monday morning and I haven’t heard anything yet; I was hoping to go this week, but maybe I have to wait a few weeks to see if someone calls or emails me back, or if I have call them again and bug them.

How is it that a priest is too busy to hear confession? We have three masses a week at the parish (and most masses are said by priests from other parishes… I see the head pastor say mass once every few months, and the associate pastor maybe once a month), the pews are about 20% full, and there are almost no ministries or activities held during the week. What are they busy doing?

I’m really tempted to find another parish, but maybe I’d have the same problem there. Should I maybe call nearby parishes and see if I can find a priest elsewhere to hear my confession?

Thanks,

Mark

 

[anonymous_in_fl]

You can make confession at any parish. Call another parish and schedule an appointment, make a good examenation of conscience, and go!

 

[Mary_Ellen]

You may want to try another parish.

My parish has two priests and one deacon. While they do have assistance on the weekends from area retired or traveling priests they serve 3 churches with 11 weekend masses and 5 weekday masses. Last week we had 11 funeral masses or funeral home services and at least one Baptism. Needless to say those men are BUSY. But they still find time to offer Confession at 3 PM Saturdays at all 3 churches, at 4 PM on Wednesdays, Fridays, and Sundays in just one location AND they are willing to make appointments to hear confessions.

 

[wild_thing]

Call another parish to arrange a time for confession.

 

[Deo_Gratias42]

Story of my life. I was away for 10 years too. It took me three months, two dioceses and three cities before I found a priest willing to hear my confession. I was successful with the FSSP. Try them, even if you have to go to another city. You won’t regret it.

 

[Casilda]

Story of my life. I was away for 10 years too. It took me three months, two dioceses and three cities before I found a priest willing to hear my confession. I was successful with the FSSP. Try them, even if you have to go to another city. You won’t regret it.

Ditto, almost 2 years for me, two dioceses, four cities and seven parishes. Calling them and bugging them didn’t help for me. Almost like its rigged against reverts. I was led out by my parents (46 years ago) and I am beginning to think it was God’s will I didn’t grow up in it and I wasn’t able to return to it, either. I am however an Eastern Catholic now.

 

[Aim4TheMark]

Thanks for the feedback. I’m wondering though, do a lot of priests just no longer believe in the value of the sacrament of penance?

I’m willing to give my local priests the benefit of doubt and try again next week, but if they won’t hear my confession, then I feel I must find another parish.

 

[Brendan]

We’re pretty lucky. Our pastor has stated that he was ordained to Offer Mass, Anoint the Sick and hear Confessions. Everything else is secondary. If necessary, secondary activities can be delegated to others. Not so with the Sacraments that require sacerdotal Orders.

Our parish has three daily Masses, 6:00am, 9:00am and Noon. Our pastor hears confessions for a half hour before each Mass (yes, he is in the confessional at 5:30am)

There is another block on Saturdays from 2:00pm -4:00pm

And yes, there are lines.

 

[TimothyH]

You can make confession at any parish. Call another parish and schedule an appointment, make a good examenation of conscience, and go!

You may want to try another parish.

Call another parish to arrange a time for confession.

You have a right to receive the sacraments at your home parish.

It is one thing to try another parish if you are in a rush or if a reasonable wait at your home parish is not convenient for you but you cannot be told, “Go away to another parish because we are busy.”

I would call back and politely insist. Failing that I would just bring my list to the confessional, explain to the priest that you couldn’t get an appointment and launch into my confession.

I made a 37 year confession - just showed up one Saturday afternoon with a piece of paper full of sins and walked into the confessional. The priest was wise, went through the ten commandments with me and whole thing took five minutes. I made a general confession later.

-Tim-

 

[pianistclare]

I have recently returned to my Catholic faith and have been going to mass weekly at my local parish. Over they past year, I’ve been becoming closer and closer to my Catholic faith, reading daily on the topic and trying to more strictly adhere to the Church’s teachings. One thing I’ve been severely behind on though is going to confession. The last time I went was about ten years ago, but when I told the priest I was married outside the Church, he told me he wouldn’t hear my confession until I addressed that sin - which I did by having my marriage blessed by the Church later that year. The last time I went to confession before that was when I was a child.

Anyways, since it’s been so long and I possibly have a lot to discuss, I thought I’d make an appointment. I called the parish office, asked to arrange a time for confession, and was told someone would call me back. Later that day the pastor’s secretary called me back and said he was too busy to hear confession, but maybe the associate pastor had time and asked for my email address so he could contact me. That was Monday morning and I haven’t heard anything yet; I was hoping to go this week, but maybe I have to wait a few weeks to see if someone calls or emails me back, or if I have call them again and bug them.

How is it that a priest is too busy to hear confession? We have three masses a week at the parish (and most masses are said by priests from other parishes… I see the head pastor say mass once every few months, and the associate pastor maybe once a month), the pews are about 20% full, and there are almost no ministries or activities held during the week. What are they busy doing?

I’m really tempted to find another parish, but maybe I’d have the same problem there. Should I maybe call nearby parishes and see if I can find a priest elsewhere to hear my confession?

Thanks,

Mark

That was Monday. It’s only Thursday.
Let’s not panic.
Priests do a lot more than Mass on the weekends.
Most people have NO idea what goes on during the week in a priest’s schedule.
Be patient.
As Tim said, just get in line and go.

 

[Evania]

Thanks for the feedback. I’m wondering though, do a lot of priests just no longer believe in the value of the sacrament of penance?

I’m willing to give my local priests the benefit of doubt and try again next week, but if they won’t hear my confession, then I feel I must find another parish.

I don’t think anyone on here can answer this question on behalf of your particular priest or any other priest for that matter. I know you mean well, but a question such as above may encourage some other well meaning posters into gossiping as to whether some priests are carrying out their vocation adequately or not, based on their own opinions. Obviously, all priests should believe in the sacrament of penance, but just because a priest is not readily available does not mean he does not “believe” in it or think that it’s not important. Your plan of action at the bottom of your post is perfect. We should give them the benefit of the doubt and try again next week. If you continue to have difficulties with his schedule, it is perfectly acceptable to find another parish.

 

[pianistclare]

I don’t think anyone on here can answer this question on behalf of your particular priest or any other priest for that matter. I know you mean well, but a question such as above may encourage some other well meaning posters into gossiping as to whether some priests are carrying out their vocation adequately or not, based on their own opinions. Obviously, all priests should believe in the sacrament of penance, but just because a priest is not readily available does not mean he does not “believe” in it or think that it’s not important. Your plan of action at the bottom of your post is perfect. We should give them the benefit of the doubt and try again next week. If you continue to have difficulties with his schedule, it is perfectly acceptable to find another parish.

Indeed. This forum discourages posters from being negative remarks about the clergy.

 

[shubbysr]

Originally posted by Deo Gratias42: “Story of my life. I was away for 10 years too. It took me three months, two dioceses and three cities before I found a priest willing to hear my confession”

I am amazed that someone wanting to confess, needs to search this hard for a priest. I live in the middle of the “Bible Belt” and it isn’t this hard.

"Be with me Lord, when I am in trouble.
Be with me Lord I pray.

 

[crai7]

I have recently returned to my Catholic faith and have been going to mass weekly at my local parish. Over they past year, I’ve been becoming closer and closer to my Catholic faith, reading daily on the topic and trying to more strictly adhere to the Church’s teachings. One thing I’ve been severely behind on though is going to confession. The last time I went was about ten years ago, but when I told the priest I was married outside the Church, he told me he wouldn’t hear my confession until I addressed that sin - which I did by having my marriage blessed by the Church later that year. The last time I went to confession before that was when I was a child.

Anyways, since it’s been so long and I possibly have a lot to discuss, I thought I’d make an appointment. I called the parish office, asked to arrange a time for confession, and was told someone would call me back. Later that day the pastor’s secretary called me back and said he was too busy to hear confession, but maybe the associate pastor had time and asked for my email address so he could contact me. That was Monday morning and I haven’t heard anything yet; I was hoping to go this week, but maybe I have to wait a few weeks to see if someone calls or emails me back, or if I have call them again and bug them.

How is it that a priest is too busy to hear confession? We have three masses a week at the parish (and most masses are said by priests from other parishes… I see the head pastor say mass once every few months, and the associate pastor maybe once a month), the pews are about 20% full, and there are almost no ministries or activities held during the week. What are they busy doing?

I’m really tempted to find another parish, but maybe I’d have the same problem there. Should I maybe call nearby parishes and see if I can find a priest elsewhere to hear my confession?

Thanks,

Mark

Can’t you just confess to any Christian? The bible is not specific about it being a priest. Given the increasing number of parishes without priests, perhaps this is the most rational option?

 

[Oneofthewomen]

Can’t you just confess to any Christian? The bible is not specific about it being a priest. Given the decline in the available number of priests, perhaps this is the most rational option?

As Catholics, no this is not an option.

 

[Sunbreak]

Just go to another parish or go during regular confession times. Priests do have many things to do other than Mass. My pastor in a small parish answers the phone himself, goes to meetings concerning the parish, arranges repairs for the parish buildings, visits sick parishioners, reviews and pays the bills for the parish, even cuts the grass and many other things.

 

[Aim4TheMark]

Indeed. This forum discourages posters from being negative remarks about the clergy.

My question on if confession wasn’t valued by some priests nowadays wasn’t meant to invoke criticism but rather to just understand possible current trends in Catholicism. I’ve read several reports of Pope Francis urging priests to make confession a greater priority - which would imply that some don’t make it a priority.

Similarly, at my local parish, during the Penitential Rite in mass, the Confiteor is never used; instead, the priest just says the Kyrie (Lord have mercy / Christ have mercy), which seems to remove the confessional-like aspect of the Penitential Rite. Maybe parishioners don’t like to be reminded of sin, so some priests avoid reminding them of it.

I know some suggest to just go to the weekly scheduled confession, but after not having gone to confession for so many years, I would prefer to schedule time rather than trying to rush through it so as to not inconvenience the priest or those waiting in line. The church’s website specifically says Rite of Reconciliation is available “by appointment by calling the Parish Office.” Please don’t invite me to call to make an appointment, then tell me the priests are too busy. And not to sound entitled, but after giving generously to the parish every week, I would hope that a priest could find a half-hour of time to hear my confession.

I saw one humorous suggestion (given by a priest) for parishioners to ‘write notes for their weekly envelopes saying: “When Father schedules more confessions, I will give more money.”’

 

[Deo_Gratias42]

Originally posted by Deo Gratias42: “Story of my life. I was away for 10 years too. It took me three months, two dioceses and three cities before I found a priest willing to hear my confession”

I am amazed that someone wanting to confess, needs to search this hard for a priest. I live in the middle of the “Bible Belt” and it isn’t this hard.

"Be with me Lord, when I am in trouble.
Be with me Lord I pray.

I also was living in the middle of a “Bible Belt”. My parish priest literally shoo’d me away. And they wonder why young people don’t want anything to do with the church…

 

[Casilda]

Thanks for the feedback. I’m wondering though, do a lot of priests just no longer believe in the value of the sacrament of penance?

I’m willing to give my local priests the benefit of doubt and try again next week, but if they won’t hear my confession, then I feel I must find another parish.

I don’t blame the priests, in the Roman diocese I live in the ratio of priest to Catholic member family is about 1:2500 in some parishes. The average, 1:1250. Thats families not individuals. Do your know your parish statistics? How many souls is your priest responsible for? Also note that some parishes have no permanent priest. Now the real question is why so few priests?

 

[Deo_Gratias42]

I don’t blame the priests, in the Roman diocese I live in the ratio of priest to Catholic member family is about 1:2500 in some parishes. The average, 1:1250. Thats families not individuals. Do your know your parish statistics? How many souls is your priest responsible for? Also note that some parishes have no permanent priest. Now the real question is why so few priests?

Priests are responsible for the salvation of souls. A main part of that is hearing confessions and returning lost sheep to the fold. It’s about priorities.