Private vows

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returningcath

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Can someone please help explain to me what constitutes a private vow? Is there a certain period of time or process that must happen to make a valid private vow?

It is difficult to describe but sometimes during prayer, I will get this feeling that if I do not allow certain thoughts to enter my heart then God will not give me peace. These thoughts usually involve some kind of deal or agreement with God. I fight them and often say something along the lines of “Jesus I am going to let this thought in but I am not promising anything” but still feel sometimes that I made some kind of a private vow.

The canon says: “A vow, that is, a deliberate and free promise made to God about a possible and better good, must be fulfilled by reason of the virtue of religion.” But it seems like there is kind of a grey area about when a private vow becomes official.

It is a great distraction to me during prayer and I really struggle to tell if I am fighting against thoughts/movements of the heart that God actually wants me to have or if they are just a distraction/from myself/etc. I do not want to make any of these vows but sometimes I feel as though I did and it troubles me.

I have spoken to my regular confessor about this and he has said to not make private vows and has “dispensed” me from any that I might have ever made, although I got the impression he did not think they were valid. I was hoping to get (name removed by moderator)ut from other people who have had this same issue. Thanks.
 
Can someone please help explain to me what constitutes a private vow? Is there a certain period of time or process that must happen to make a valid private vow?

It is difficult to describe but sometimes during prayer, I will get this feeling that if I do not allow certain thoughts to enter my heart then God will not give me peace. These thoughts usually involve some kind of deal or agreement with God. I fight them and often say something along the lines of “Jesus I am going to let this thought in but I am not promising anything” but still feel sometimes that I made some kind of a private vow.

The canon says: “A vow, that is, a deliberate and free promise made to God about a possible and better good, must be fulfilled by reason of the virtue of religion.” But it seems like there is kind of a grey area about when a private vow becomes official.

It is a great distraction to me during prayer and I really struggle to tell if I am fighting against thoughts/movements of the heart that God actually wants me to have or if they are just a distraction/from myself/etc. I do not want to make any of these vows but sometimes I feel as though I did and it troubles me.

I have spoken to my regular confessor about this and he has said to not make private vows and has “dispensed” me from any that I might have ever made, although I got the impression he did not think they were valid. I was hoping to get (name removed by moderator)ut from other people who have had this same issue. Thanks.
It sounds like you’re suffering from scrupulosity. My advice is to not consult an internet forum filled with uneducated laypeople, as that won’t help your scruples. Instead, keep in contact with your regular confessor and listen to his advice.
 
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