Problems with confessing a sin

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anneramones

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Hello.I’m new on the forum and I don’t know if I’m posting in the wrong category, anyway I hope someone can help me.I was born into a family of non-practicing Catholics.For many years I had a problem with masturbation(nobody teached me it was wrong and it was a physical need for me and I did masturbate on daily basis).Nearly two years ago I became confident of my faith,started reading Bible and became a Catholic practitioner so I stopped masturbating but I committed this sin a very few times (the last 3 months ago)and I have never been able to confess this sin to a priest.I begged God to forgive me many times during prayer but I’m too ashamed to tell my priest because sadly I’m not fond of him.He is a new priest, the old one left the church to marry a woman,and the priest of another church in my town is said to be homosexual so I’m not fond of them at all…so now I don’t know what to do!Since the last time I committed this sin I didn’t go to confession and didn’t take eucharisty. I am wondering if I can directly ask God forgiveness for the sin of masturbation and do not tell the priest in confession?Sorry if my English is not correct but it’s not my first language.
 
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May God give you courage, strength, and peace.

People shouldn’t gossip about the priest in the other Church, and even if what people say is true, whether he is homosexual or heterosexual, is irrelevant if the priest is living a chaste life. People don’t have the right to judge him. His vocation is to be a priest, and both homosexual and heterosexual priests are required to remain chaste. Those who judge him by externals, are committing slander while damaging his reputation with gossip, especially if by that gossip they are judging him. You yourself are affected in your attitude to this priest because of people’s gossip. How many other people also are affected?

The priest’s orientation, lived chastely, makes no difference to his vocation as a priest or to his fitness to hear Confessions. It’s not relevant whether or not we like the priest, he is God’s instrument of the Sacraments, including Confession.

Please do go to Confession for grace and for peace of soul. If you find it difficult to say it any other way, and were to say something like, “I sinned privately against chastity” it’s clear what you mean.
It is Jesus who gave us the Sacrament of Confession, and we need to trust Jesus in Confession.
Jesus said to His priest through the apostles, His first priests:
“Whose sins you shall forgive they are forgiven:” (John 20:19)
 
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Welcome to CAF! (Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)

It’s great that you are seeking the Lord and seeking to live out your Catholic faith. It’s also great that you seem to be making progress with regards to this particular sin.

I would encourage you not to let the personality of the priest keep you from the sacraments. I’ve known many, many priests in my life. The vast majority are really good men. Some of them are “odd ducks”. And none of them are perfect in every way. But they are all ordained to minister and administer the sacraments in order that we may receive grace. It is a truly awesome thing!

I know that some sins (like this one) make us feel quite embarrassed. Look at it as an opportunity to grow in humility. And we could all use more humility. The priest has heard it all before. He’s not allowed to reveal or act upon what you reveal in Confession (for example, by treating you differently).

I’d venture to guess that the reason you are here posting this thread is because you recognize you need to do this, but you just need a little nudge. 🙂 Well, consider this your friendly nudge. Go to Confession! 😉 You’ll definitely be glad that you went and can clean the slate and begin to receive the Eucharist. It’s really the only option, too. If you’re a little uneasy, that’s okay. Pray for courage and just go.

God bless. I will say a prayer for you.
 
Hi!

The short answer is that you can’t just not confess this. You need to confess. It does not matter if you do not like a priest. Choose the one that bothers you the least. You are not going to shock a priest with your confession. They hear people confess about masturbating all the time. Just do it. Pray for strength. God bless.
 
First, I understand being embarrassed to confess to a priest you know and might have to see again. Even though I fully agree that priests have “heard it all”, for certain confessions I have made sure to take myself to a church/priest I don’t know from Adam and will likely never see again. You do have to confess to a priest though. You do not get a free pass to just skip confession because you’re embarrassed.

I sincerely doubt there are only 2 priests available to you. Aren’t there any shrines, monasteries, cathedrals etc in your area offering regular confessions? These are all good places to find priests you don’t know for confessions.

Also, please stop spreading or listening to the gossip about the neighboring priest, or you will soon have another sin to confess.
 
Priests have heard this sin confessed thousands of times. It’s not going to startle any priest to hear a penitent confess to masturbation, or even to say he committed the sin daily for a number of years.
 
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It is essential to confess as soon as possible. Put your opinions about a priest aside and you need to remember it is Jesus in the place of the priest that is forgiving your sin.

I would recommend praying three Hail Marys in the morning and three at night for purity.

Even if you could say this O Mary conceived without sin pray for us who have recourse to thee x 3
 
I did go to confession today. Thank you all for your help and prayers, I knew I needed to confess but I was lacking courage and you all really helped me.
 
The presence of a priest on Earth changes when he works in the confessional. It is like the angels of The Lord always say, “don’t be afraid!” If you believe that God sacrificed his only son to clear the path to heaven for you and granted you the ability to use a holy sacrament to rid yourself of sin, how can you refuse? Make the most of the holy sacrament of confession, as it says in the book of James we are to confess our sins to one another. Even a child could answer “who is better to reveal your sins to, a priest or someone associated with the act itself?” One brings more chaos into the world, the other (using trust) disposes of it. Be on a mission for a while to remove the darkness from our world and trust the confessional. Pope Francis inspired many when he performed a “live” confession. Believe and follow that example.
 
God bless you, Anna. Much of the advice given here is sound (e.g., that you should go to confession for sure, even if it’s with a priest you don’t like, etc.), and I join those who’ve encouraged you to make a good confession and move forward. However, a few unfortunate and incorrect comments suggested that you committed the sin of “gossip” or “slander” by mentioning in your post that a priest in your area may be homosexual. Your mention of this detail is certainly not gossip, nor is it slander, as you did not identify any specific man, nor does anyone even know where you live. Your non-specific mention of that detail is entirely legitimate and helpful for context, so don’t worry that you may have committed “another” sin by way of gossip, etc. You haven’t.

To illustrate this point, note that in her autobiography, Saint Teresa of Avila (a doctor of the Church) wrote about a certain priest she knew (though did not name) and to whom she went to confession. He had a concubine on the side and wore an occultic copper amulet the woman had given him when she attempted to cast a spell on him. Saint Teresa did not commit the sin of slander by mentioning this detail in the account of her life, nor was she gossiping.
 
Most priests will not blink an eyelid, few will even comment at all, when a sin so commonly confessed is (probably for the dozenth time that week) brought before them.

The personal faults and failings of a priest matter as little as the personality of a doctor. If one is in need of medical help, it doesn’t do any good, and can do a lot of harm, to conceal the true nature and extent of one’s illness (or symptoms) from one’s doctor. Personality clashes don’t change that fact, nor do they (usually) affect the doctor’s ability to treat what ails you.

Even more so with priests, whose authority and power comes not from themselves or any personal gift of holiness or wisdom, but direct from Christ. Think of how very human and fallible some of the Apostles were, and yet He gave them all the power and authority to forgive sin.
 
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Correct me if I’m wrong but for you’re own good i believe deliberately not confessing a sin is also a sin.

Congratulations on the confession though, God bless
 
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