Process of Annulment

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audlee21

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Hello,

First post! Looking for answers on the process of an annulment in the Catholic Church.
I was born and raised in the Catholic Church. My (ex) husband became Catholic through RCIA before we got married in the Church.

We have since divorced… he left me for his brother’s (now ex) wife. She was also born and raised in the Catholic Church and his brother became Catholic for their marriage as well.

Both couples attemped to work it out the first time until it happened again. Our divorces were both final about 3 years ago.

My ex recently asked for my contact information so he could start the annulment process - meaning those two want to get married in the Catholic Church. He said someone from the Diocese would be contacting me.

I do NOT agree with what they are doing and don’t support it in any way.

I’m just looking for how the process works. What should I expect? Anything?!!

Thank you in advance!
 
I’m so sorry u are going through this. I’m not sure what happens but there would have to be an impediment before your marriage with your husband that made the marriage null. If there wasn’t an impediment I would be honest once the paperwork comes in. I will pray for you, I can’t imagine the pain. Stay close to the Lord, our relationship with him is always #1.
 
You’ll receive a questionnaire from the diocese. I would encourage you to participate in the process and fill it out. Particularly if you believe your marriage to be valid, you should ask your parish to steer you toward a procurator/advocate (who will not necessarily be a priest) to help you.

Depending on the diocese, you may be asked to come in for an interview. Again, I encourage you to participate. Sometimes, spouses are under the erroneous impression that non-participation stops the process – it does not.

I’m sorry you are going through this – it sounds like an awful situation.
 
Thank you for the help and kind words. I’m just frusterated that even though our divorce has been final 3 years, I now have to relive those feelings all over again when it took me so so so long to even begin to heal.
 
The process can indeed be very difficult – although it can often lead to a healing and closure. Particularly if the marriage is found to be invalid, the process can help you examine what was going on at the time of the wedding and avoid the same problems with future relationships.
 
So there would have to be grounds on the day we said “I do”, for the marriage to be considered invalid?
 
Or prior to that. The process does not look at the breakdown of the marriage, other than how that might indicate a lack of ability to give consent or some other ground at the time of the marriage.

For example, infidelity itself is not grounds for annulment. Also, while the process does not assign blame per se, I have seen the spouse who was the cause of the marital breakdown receive a decree of nullity with a notation that they were not allowed to remarry.

This is why I’d talk to someone who handles this at your parish – they can help you through the process. Again, I’m really sorry you’re going through this – it stinks.
 
OP, please know that the process can move forward whether you choose to participate or not.
You do not have to participate if you do not wish to do so. But your participation will help make things clearer by telling both sides of the story, not just your ex husbands. Just fill out what they ask, as best you can. I have heard many people say it can be a healing process for them.

You may also want to use the search feature and see what others have experienced.

Welcome to CAF!
 
Thank you, again <3
My mom and I plan on talking with our priest soon
 
A couple of impediments would be, although there are more:

One or both of the person’s never wanted children.

Your marriage was not consumated. 50 years of contraception does not consumate a marriage.

Their was deceit and lying prior to the marriage. Your spouse asked you if you were a virgin, and you lied and said yes, the marriage can be nullified.

A great audio series by Fr. John Hardon on Marriage, annulments and the like.
therealpresence.org/archives/MP3/RP0002000.htm
 
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You have to be careful about the fourth example you listed. It’s not quite as cut-and-dried as that. While a lie is serious, it doesn’t automatically qualify as grounds for nullity.
 
I also have a question about the process. my witnesses (devout Christians) received their questionnaires and they were appalled at the sensitive, personal information they were being asked. respectfully, how much information is really necessary? and, if each diocese has their own policies how is any of it per laws of the church?
 
The questions are fairly consistent. Many of them are quite personal; but no witness is expected to know the answers to all of them. Your witnesses should just answer the questions about which they have knowledge, and mark the others “no knowledge.”
 
audlee21 said:
I do NOT agree with what they are doing and don’t support it in any way.

I’m just looking for how the process works. What should I expect? Anything?!!
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Since he is pursuing the decree of nullity, you are the respondent. You will have an opportunity to respond to the petition and answer questions. If you believe your marriage is valid, you will have the opportunity to say so and tell the tribunal why.

If the tribunal rules that the marriage is null, you have the right to petition to the court of second instance.
 
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My advice would depend on what the issue is for you here. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m guessing that you’re upset because of one of two scenarios.
  1. You truly believe that your marriage was valid. In this case, I agree with seeing if you can get a canon lawyer or someone well-versed in the nullity process to advise you.
  2. You are concerned that the process will bring up painful memories and you’d rather not have to go through that again. In this case, because you are the respondent, you’re not required to be part of the process. You can be a part of it if you wish, but you are also fully within your rights to decide not to participate. The process can then go ahead without you. You’ll still have the right to review any evidence presented (as long as it has not been redacted), you’ll have the right to be informed of the results of the investigation, and you’ll have the right to appeal if you wish. If you don’t want to be part of the process, all you have to do is let the tribunal know. After that, as I mentioned, you’ll only be contacted to let you know the evidence is in and you can review it if you like (you don’t have to do so), and the final outcome.
My husband has a declaration of nullity from his first marriage. His ex decided that she did not wish to be involved. The proceedings went ahead without her and the declaration of nullity was granted.

Just as an FYI - a declaration of nullity does not mean that your life together was a lie, nor does it mean that any children you had were illegitimate. The Church is NOT saying that you never had a relationship. Clearly, you had a wedding, you had a conjugal life, you may have had children from that union. That doesn’t change just because the marriage may not be valid. Rather, the Church is saying that in the eyes of God, there was something fundamentally “missing” from the marriage covenant. You had a legal contract and a conjugal life, but in God’s eyes, you never had a valid covenant. As far as children, children born of a valid or putative (i.e. at least one party attempted marriage in good faith) marriage are considered legitimate. My husband has a daughter from his first marriage. He attempted marriage in good faith, so it was a putative marriage. His daughter is not illegitimate.
 
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