A
AaronsStaff
Guest
I was hoping someone could clear up for me what the Church’s teaching is on promises or pledges, etc.
I’m asking because I’m getting concerned about the prospect of being morally bound to do certain things and then neglecting to do them if I am obligated.
In one instance I promised a friend a few years back to send them a letter, ( they live in a foreign country so it was more of a souvenir than anything) I never ended up doing it, and this friend and I aren’t that close anymore, rarely talk, a few times a year at most, and they seem to have forgotten all about this. So, in regards to this situation, what is my obligation here? I had gone to confession, long time ago, and confessed that I hadn’t kept this promise, but am I still obligated to fulfill it? It seems to me that this promise, made like several years ago seems to have hit a de facto expiration date, am I wrong in thinking this? Moreover, does the Church have any teaching on promise keeping? This promise wasn’t made to God, or invoking God at all, it was simply me adding emphasis to do something with the understanding that it would be wrong of me not to do just as a matter of keeping my word. So, does the Church see promises, the use of that concept as unique at all? In that they are unconditionally morally binding? Does releasing us from our promises require a priest, in the same way releasing us from oaths does?
In another case, I had joined an honor society a few years back as part of school. And this situation is a little more tricky. They have a so called “oath”, and you simply agree to it by the click of a mouse on the website, but the membership pledge doesn’t have the word “swear” at all, it uses the words solemnly promise and pledge. And at the time I agreed to this, it was my understanding that this was not an oath, I did not promise or pledge to God from my understanding, and I did not invoke God as witness in the way you do with actual oaths. So, my concern is, now that I see that it is referred to as an oath on the society’s website (but also referred to as a pledge in other places), am I bound to it by oath even though I never had the intention of swearing a true oath? and never saw it as an oath but merely a promise and pledge? In spite of the fact that it is referred to an oath at one point but never actually using the term swear in the pledge itself? Keep in mind the pledge had nothing immoral in it, and at the time, I certainly did not think I was swearing an oath:
So essentially this all boils down to:
Are promises not made to God, and not calling God as witness morally binding? Even if when we make them we think it wrong to break them?
If they are morally binding, does it require a priest to release us from them in the way being released from oaths does? Or since it is a venial matter (unlike oath taking which is grave), is it something that can be dealt with outside the confessional like other venial sins? And we can just be sorry for making promises we didn’t keep, or don’t think we can keep, and just move on while no longer being bound to them?
I’m asking because I’m getting concerned about the prospect of being morally bound to do certain things and then neglecting to do them if I am obligated.
In one instance I promised a friend a few years back to send them a letter, ( they live in a foreign country so it was more of a souvenir than anything) I never ended up doing it, and this friend and I aren’t that close anymore, rarely talk, a few times a year at most, and they seem to have forgotten all about this. So, in regards to this situation, what is my obligation here? I had gone to confession, long time ago, and confessed that I hadn’t kept this promise, but am I still obligated to fulfill it? It seems to me that this promise, made like several years ago seems to have hit a de facto expiration date, am I wrong in thinking this? Moreover, does the Church have any teaching on promise keeping? This promise wasn’t made to God, or invoking God at all, it was simply me adding emphasis to do something with the understanding that it would be wrong of me not to do just as a matter of keeping my word. So, does the Church see promises, the use of that concept as unique at all? In that they are unconditionally morally binding? Does releasing us from our promises require a priest, in the same way releasing us from oaths does?
In another case, I had joined an honor society a few years back as part of school. And this situation is a little more tricky. They have a so called “oath”, and you simply agree to it by the click of a mouse on the website, but the membership pledge doesn’t have the word “swear” at all, it uses the words solemnly promise and pledge. And at the time I agreed to this, it was my understanding that this was not an oath, I did not promise or pledge to God from my understanding, and I did not invoke God as witness in the way you do with actual oaths. So, my concern is, now that I see that it is referred to as an oath on the society’s website (but also referred to as a pledge in other places), am I bound to it by oath even though I never had the intention of swearing a true oath? and never saw it as an oath but merely a promise and pledge? In spite of the fact that it is referred to an oath at one point but never actually using the term swear in the pledge itself? Keep in mind the pledge had nothing immoral in it, and at the time, I certainly did not think I was swearing an oath:
So essentially this all boils down to:
Are promises not made to God, and not calling God as witness morally binding? Even if when we make them we think it wrong to break them?
If they are morally binding, does it require a priest to release us from them in the way being released from oaths does? Or since it is a venial matter (unlike oath taking which is grave), is it something that can be dealt with outside the confessional like other venial sins? And we can just be sorry for making promises we didn’t keep, or don’t think we can keep, and just move on while no longer being bound to them?