Proper thing for non-Catholic to do during Eucharist?

[Dags800]

I am a non-Catholic engaged to a Catholic, and while I have been to Mass with him several times, it’s always been a less than crowded Mass because he works weekends. I would like to start going to Mass on the weekends by myself, but it will be a larger crowd than what I’m used to and I don’t really know a lot of people there. I want to do what’s right and not offend anyone…what am I supposed to do during the time when the parishioners are receiving communion? Do I stay seated? Politely stand beside the pew until the people on the other side of me come back, then slide into my seat?

Any advice would be appreciated, as he just says, “Do what you feel comfortable doing” and I’m not comfortable because it’s so unfamiliar.

 

[Jea9]

Before I was baptized, I sat in the pew praying or singing the communion song. Just be reverent, and polite…it’s wonderful to sit in the peace of Christ.

Good luck!

 

[baltobetsy]

Bless you for wanting to do the right thing! You may stay seated in your pew and pray or sing according to what’s being done around you.

If you need to get up to let others pass on the way out of the pew, it’s probably better to sit back down while they’re gone so as not to obstruct the flow of traffic in the aisle. Step out of the pew when you see them coming back and take your place as they return.

Please be assured that people are not paying much attention to you, looking for things to criticize about you. They’re wrapped up in their own prayers or keeping their kids in line or whatever. Unless you’re really, truly rude, it’s pretty hard to make people notice you enough to be upset with you. From what you have said already, I’m quite sure you’re not rude at all!

Please don’t be offended if people don’t notice you’re a visitor right away and make an effort to welcome you. Catholics are used to a large choice of Sunday Masses, and will assume that a new person is just a regular attendee of another Mass. Go ahead and introduce yourself to your neighbors in the pew after Mass if you like.

Welcome!

Betsy

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

I am a non-Catholic engaged to a Catholic, and while I have been to Mass with him several times, it’s always been a less than crowded Mass because he works weekends. I would like to start going to Mass on the weekends by myself, but it will be a larger crowd than what I’m used to and I don’t really know a lot of people there. I want to do what’s right and not offend anyone…what am I supposed to do during the time when the parishioners are receiving communion? Do I stay seated? Politely stand beside the pew until the people on the other side of me come back, then slide into my seat?

Any advice would be appreciated, as he just says, “Do what you feel comfortable doing” and I’m not comfortable because it’s so unfamiliar.

Depending on how long the pews are it would make sense to sit on the end so that you would be the last person to leave the pew, if you were to go up for Communion. Then simply don’t go. Remain kneeling and make a Spiritual Communion in your place. When you see most of the people in the pew in front of you have returned. Simply stand up at the end of the pew and let the others back in after everyone has returned, kneel back down with everyone else.

 

[alanswife30]

At our parish, non-Catholics can go up to the priest during Communion with their arms crossed over their chest. The Priest will see this and give that person a blessing instead of Communion.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

At our parish, non-Catholics can go up to the priest during Communion with their arms crossed over their chest. The Priest will see this and give that person a blessing instead of Communion.

Which in my opinion should not be encouraged.

Archbishop Chaput:

"Usually the children in line will look up expectantly at the person distributing holy Communion. The minister then responds by doing one of several things: He or she may pat the child’s head, or touch the head in a sign of blessing, or mark the child’s forehead with a sign of the cross. As warm and well intentioned as the gesture may be, in the context of the liturgy, the Communion procession really isn’t the time for a blessing of children or adults who are unable to receive Communion. "

---

 

[alanswife30]

Which in my opinion should not be encouraged.

Why is that Br. Rich? I’m curious to know why you think that. I’m in RCIA and our RCIA director (who is a Sister of St. Francis) and the Priest in charge of RCIA have told us to do this at Communion. Sister got us all excited the other night when she told us, “On Good Friday, when you go up with your arms crossed for the blessing, that’s the last time you’ll do that!”! I can’t wait!!

 

[THurifer2]

At our parish, non-Catholics can go up to the priest during Communion with their arms crossed over their chest. The Priest will see this and give that person a blessing instead of Communion.

This is not allowed in my parish. My priest politely and kindly ask the communicant to meet him after Mass.

EMHCs have recently been told to inform people that they will be blessed after communion with the rest of the congregation.

 

[THurifer2]

Why is that Br. Rich? I’m curious to know why you think that.

It is discouraged in the more traditionalist parishes and forbidden in some. My priest says it is liturgically incorrect because it is the communion line and not the blessing line. I have read that it is an innovation that has sprung up from the false ecumenism that has plagued the church the last 30-40 years.

It is a volatile subject. It is certainly somthing that has not come to us from the Magisterium.

I personally think it is pointless since the entire congregation gets a blessing a few short minutes later. It also creates a potential false sense of communion because it is instilling a mechanism to make people appear to be in communion with the church…it is stretching the envelope and likely somthing that comes from the excessive “inclusion” mentality that bombards us in todays society.

 

[Tomster]

I am a non-Catholic engaged to a Catholic, and while I have been to Mass with him several times, it’s always been a less than crowded Mass because he works weekends. I would like to start going to Mass on the weekends by myself, but it will be a larger crowd than what I’m used to and I don’t really know a lot of people there. I want to do what’s right and not offend anyone…what am I supposed to do during the time when the parishioners are receiving communion? Do I stay seated? Politely stand beside the pew until the people on the other side of me come back, then slide into my seat?

Any advice would be appreciated, as he just says, “Do what you feel comfortable doing” and I’m not comfortable because it’s so unfamiliar.

Dags800,

Everyone has given you some good advice. After your pew has emptied, and this is just a suggestion, you might want to move to an empty pew if you can find one and read the prayers “before communion” and “after communion” in the missalette. Doing this might help you feel more at ease and help convey the solemnity of the moment.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Why is that Br. Rich? I’m curious to know why you think that. I’m in RCIA and our RCIA director (who is a Sister of St. Francis) and the Priest in charge of RCIA have told us to do this at Communion. Sister got us all excited the other night when she told us, “On Good Friday, when you go up with your arms crossed for the blessing, that’s the last time you’ll do that!”! I can’t wait!!

Well the Archbishop explains his reasoning pretty well. The Communion procession is not the place for the blessing of people who cannot receive.

Archbishop also says that only priests and deacons have the ability to bless with a liturgical context anyway. In many parishes lay people assume a function not proper to them.

My reasoning is that many church documents mention that people who cannot receive for various reasons should not approach Holy Communion. To me using the word “approach” means not going up, period.

 

[MrS]

Exactly.

Would that more priests would explain this correctly, and then follow through.

 

[Dags800]

Thank you all for the wise advice. I think I am going to just sit at the very end so I can move aside when the rest of the people sitting in my pew come back from receiving communion.

I’ll admit I am a little apprehensive about attending Mass all by myself as a non-Catholic, but I’m sure once I am actually there and sitting in the pew I will be fine!

 

[THurifer2]

Thank you all for the wise advice. I think I am going to just sit at the very end so I can move aside when the rest of the people sitting in my pew come back from receiving communion.

I’ll admit I am a little apprehensive about attending Mass all by myself as a non-Catholic, but I’m sure once I am actually there and sitting in the pew I will be fine!

Don’t fret about attending Mass alone as a non-Catholic…on any given Sunday Mass we have a good 6-12 people stay in the pews for various reasons…i usually don’t even notice and when I do I think nothing of it. I am happy to welcome you to Mass…I hope you enjoy your experience and if you are entering into the Church soon big ole welcome and Howdy do to you. New Catholics are often very good Catholics…so thanks for coming home.

 

[Pro-Life_Teen]

Just staying seated shouldn’t be a problem, people don’t go up for Communion for many reasons, be it they ate something in the car and it was less than an hour before Communion, they are visiting from different churches or know they are in the State of Mortal Sin. In the States it seems more common to just go up and receive, but in Europe a great deal of people stay behind.

And, if I may hijack the thread for a brief moment, if going up to get a blessing is discouraged, what would one do with small children who won’t stay seated? If you bring them up, there’s a good chance they’ll be given a blessing. Do you wave this away, or let it go?

 

[THurifer2]

And, if I may hijack the thread for a brief moment, if going up to get a blessing is discouraged, what would one do with small children who won’t stay seated? If you bring them up, there’s a good chance they’ll be given a blessing. Do you wave this away, or let it go?

If they are old enough to stay back then let them stay back. If they are not old enough then take them to communion with you. If they are given a blessing…great…but I have young children and they have never been taught to do the crossing of the arms for the blessing…they just tag along beside me…and occaisionally a priest or deacon will bless them…no big deal.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Thank you all for the wise advice. I think I am going to just sit at the very end so I can move aside when the rest of the people sitting in my pew come back from receiving communion.

I’ll admit I am a little apprehensive about attending Mass all by myself as a non-Catholic, but I’m sure once I am actually there and sitting in the pew I will be fine!

You will be fine.