Protestant tactics used to draw kids away from the Church

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DeSanto

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Without going into great detail, I will just say, I’m a revert who wishes my conversion came a little earlier, for my kids sake. I took about 4 years after my intial conversion before I stepped back into the church and brought my husband and four kids along with me as well. Before that there was very little to no church going - going on in our family. First I had begun praying a lot and had begun to get deep into study of scripture and a good confession after 25 years of being out of the Church. Then came the strong conviction of an urgent mission to get my children baptized and into church. Since my confirmation (I had already received the other sacraments as a child) I have begun learning apologetics and using the internet, I believe is a great start, because of the anonomity all resources I need right at my finger tips. I have much more to learn, I feel, before I’m ready to go out on my own and challenge others. I also have continued to attend RCAI in hopes of one day becoming an instructor.

Lately, I have been engaging on some pretty strong anti-Catholic forums, and I’m learning so much and doing a pretty good job of holding my own. At least I think so. But, I’m becoming concerned for my children. The town I live in is a very Protestant area. Mainly Baptist. There is only one Catholic Church and it’s not very big. I know Protestants will target younger, teenage kids, who don’t know their faith very well, and how easy it could be to draw them from the Church. And, as I said, I don’t feel my apologetics skills are up to par. I do much better when I can sit down and think and research than being able to articulate myself when put on the spot.

My hope is that many Protestant converts will comment on this thread and let me in on the most common tactics used to draw people from the Church and how to combat them.

Thank you,
Kelly
 
DeSanto said:
My hope is that many Protestant converts will comment on this thread and let me in on the most common tactics used to draw people from the Church and how to combat them.

Thank you,
Kelly
Click to expand...
Not a protestant convert, but a “semi-revert” who was buying into the protestant arguments for some time (after a period of agnosticism).

For yourself, read Catholicism and Fundamentalism
For your kids (assuming they’re between about 8 and 15):
The Truth Is Out There
 
I have a friend who was a former Protestant seminarian before he converted to Catholicism. He would state that some pastors could convert Catholics overnight based on the use of scripture. Obviously, my friend eventually saw that Scripture actually supports Catholic teaching and converted. I’d imagine the most likely thing for a Protestant attempting conversion would be the heavy use of Scripture. So maybe counter balance that by spending time explaining scripture to your kids?

I will say this however: Don’t worry about your knowledge not being up to par. No one’s is. No one perfectly understands the faith. Keep doing what you’re doing, keep researching and learning, but make a point of sharing that with your kids.

My parents bought the Faith and Life series textbooks and every Sunday my Dad would have us read a chapter by ourselves and then he’d quiz us on it. You don’t have to do that exactly, but maybe set up something where you regularly are sharing with your children what you’ve learned? If there’s a CCD program, make sure they are registered, that’ll help. If they are older, any youth ministry programs would also help. Finally, usually there are youth retreats you can sign them up for. Ask your church if they hold any or know of any not too far away!

And probably most importantly, make the faith a regular part of your family dialog. Encourage your kids as much as possible to study up on the faith and learn it.

I’m not a parent, so I hope this advice helps, but I’m going more based on how my parents raised me.
 
DeSanto said:
First I had begun praying a lot and had begun to get deep into study of scripture and a good confession after 25 years of being out of the Church. Then came the strong conviction of an urgent mission to get my children baptized and into church. Since my confirmation (I had already received the other sacraments as a child) I have begun learning apologetics

I do much better when I can sit down and think and research than being able to articulate myself when put on the spot.

My hope is that many Protestant converts will comment on this thread and let me in on the most common tactics used to draw people from the Church and how to combat them.

Thank you,
Kelly
Click to expand...
Congratulations on your return to the Church and your great desire to bring your beautiful children to the Church as well.

May God continue to guide you on this wonderful journey of faith.

There really is no need to allow yourself to be “put on the spot”. God has given you a great desire to know the Faith. God has shown you that you love His Truth and that your best way of learning and sharing His Truth is to take your time.

Don’t feel you need to “combat” others who may wish to “bring their understanding of truth” to others.

Teach your children the Faith. Live your faith. Share your faith by word and action
of your life with others.

Be at Peace. May God grant you His Peace in your great desire to share the Truth.

Always keep in mind:

1 Peter 3:15 -16
Always be ready to give an explanation to anyone who asks you for a reason for your hope, but do it with gentleness and reverence.

usccb.org/bible/1peter/3/
 
Hello! I converted to Catholicism from a Protestant background. May I share my first impression from your post? It sounds like you may be feeling overwhelmed and even burnt-out by the conflict, always on the defensive. This can rob your peace. For me, I can become constantly angry and distrustful when I have to live like this, and I’m not able to make space and silence that my heart or soul needs to grow. I become hardened, not only against non-Catholic Christians, but even to some degree against Catholicism (because it isn’t as cynical as I am! :p)

God will make things work out all right, maybe not now, maybe not for generations, but I try (not always successfully) to remember that God would not have allowed the disunity in Christianity if there was not a greater good that He could bring out of it.

I’m not a mom, but it seems like the best way to help your children would be to give them a love and knowledge of the Eucharist. He comes to us, not only as a symbol, or even as a meaningful spiritual reality, but bodily, under the appearance of bread. The Lover of their souls is not only spiritually, but physically present, and in the loving semblance of bread to feed them with Himself. Attempts to bring young people away from Catholicism will probably be attacking, however innocently, the reality of the Real Presence. If they are invited to know that Jesus, their best Friend, is truly in the Tabernacle and always ready for a visit or a conversation, it might help with inoculation.
🤷
 
I am a recent convert to Catholicism. The past 40 years I was a Baptist. I don’t feel the Baptist church I attended tried to draw children away from Catholicism. We tried to engage children with a knowledge of the saving power and grace of Jesus Christ. We never told them they were “wrong.” We encouraged them to attend church to learn about Jesus, and didn’t tell them we were the “only” church. I believe there are Christians in most “denominations.” If they attended Catholic church, that was fine. Many Catholics, I have found, don’t have a solid foundation of faith in Christ; many follow a ritual, not knowing why things are done as they are. It is important to follow Christ, and if they find Him in the Catholic Church that is wonderful.
 
DeSanto said:
Without going into great detail, I will just say, I’m a revert who wishes my conversion came a little earlier, for my kids sake. I took about 4 years after my intial conversion before I stepped back into the church and brought my husband and four kids along with me as well. Before that there was very little to no church going - going on in our family. First I had begun praying a lot and had begun to get deep into study of scripture and a good confession after 25 years of being out of the Church. Then came the strong conviction of an urgent mission to get my children baptized and into church. Since my confirmation (I had already received the other sacraments as a child) I have begun learning apologetics and using the internet, I believe is a great start, because of the anonomity all resources I need right at my finger tips. I have much more to learn, I feel, before I’m ready to go out on my own and challenge others. I also have continued to attend RCAI in hopes of one day becoming an instructor.

Lately, I have been engaging on some pretty strong anti-Catholic forums, and I’m learning so much and doing a pretty good job of holding my own. At least I think so. But, I’m becoming concerned for my children. The town I live in is a very Protestant area. Mainly Baptist. There is only one Catholic Church and it’s not very big. I know Protestants will target younger, teenage kids, who don’t know their faith very well, and how easy it could be to draw them from the Church. And, as I said, I don’t feel my apologetics skills are up to par. I do much better when I can sit down and think and research than being able to articulate myself when put on the spot.

My hope is that many Protestant converts will comment on this thread and let me in on the most common tactics used to draw people from the Church and how to combat them.

Thank you,
Kelly
Click to expand...
If you are talking about teenagers, (and increasingly even young adults) they do it by selling fun.

They do all kinds of activities, have a lounge type vibe, rock music worship that creates a reaction, and of course the guilt free teaching of once saved always saved (I know not all claim this teaching, but it rears its head officially or in officially all the time).
 
DeSanto said:
My hope is that many Protestant converts will comment on this thread and let me in on the most common tactics used to draw people from the Church and how to combat them.

Thank you,
Kelly
Click to expand...
I am not Catholic nor Protestant not even really “Christian” but I happen to have been to many churches and the one thing many Protestant groups have over Catholics in general here in the States is that they seek you out for fellowship.

When I was a young lad and had interest in finding religion, it was the Baptists and Pentecostals who would go out of the way to send someone out to pick me up for church and youth groups, not to say when I went to Catholic churches they were not polite and friendly but the protestants were much more willing to go the extra mile for a lost 9 year old kid.

And many of my friends in Baptist and Pentecostal youth groups were cradle Catholics or other mainline Churches that did not find the RCC or their Mainline Church engaging enough to continue attending.

When I was interested in Catholicism the laypeople and Priests I met with were really nice and inviting I even went to RCIA classes.

I do not really know if it a tactic but the sense of fellowship and love I got from Protestants was a bit above and beyond what I got from the Catholics.
 
I am a convert from Evangelicalism. To make this brief as possible (:D) I will say Evangelicals usually try to use social relationships to draw people in. So they will invite people to the “wonderful” worship service and bible studies, and to their Vacation Bible Schools, and various church social events. They offer to help someone move, say, in order to show the “love of Christ.” After that they can “share the Gospel.”

The ex-Catholics I met as an Evangelical had a poor grasp of actual Church teaching. For example, one woman mentioned she was terrified that she would die before she could make it to Confession. I assumed as an Evangelical that Catholics routinely committed mortal sins weekly so it made sense to me. I asked another ex-Catholic if she found it hard to obey all the rules the Catholics had. Her response: oh, rules, oh yes, there are a lot of rules. And a lot of them grew up in homes where the parents stopped attending Mass and didn’t take their faith seriously.

I assume you are aware that Evangelicals are good at selecting key Bible verses to support their theological position and ignoring the rest. Just as a reminder: Evangelicals truly believe they are doing someone a favor by “bringing them to the Lord.”
 
FathersKnowBest said:
Not a protestant convert, but a “semi-revert” who was buying into the protestant arguments for some time (after a period of agnosticism).

For yourself, read Catholicism and Fundamentalism
For your kids (assuming they’re between about 8 and 15):
The Truth Is Out There
Click to expand...
Yes, sorry. My children are 8, 13, 15 and 17

Thank you for the reference, I have just recently purchased that ebook, I’ll definately get to reading it.
 
Someone in the thread mentioned the book “Catholicism and Fundamentalism” by Karl Keating. It is an excellent resource book that covers the many objections and misunderstandings that others have about Catholicism.

And, it is best to stay away from debating with non-Catholics who really do not want to have honest dialogue.
Just “kick the dust from your shoes” and leave. They can only disturb your peace if you allow it.
 
Protestants understand the human need for fellowship and belonging much better than Catholics. That’s essentially why my family left the Church, my older daughter got disillusioned by the fact that there was no life in the Church, it had allowed all religious ed to die, no youth group, it was only a place you went to go to Mass because you have to.

I had made every effort, but lived too far away from any other church. There was too much bickering between various factions in the local church, an older, introverted priest, and a breakdown of any attempt to reach out and support young people.
 
I grew up Episcopalian… which isn’t much different than Catholicism. But the things that are different are very different.

For me, it was my mom that brought me to the faith. Church was the only place I felt safe and at peace. I haven’t ever been to another church, there wasn’t ever the want to. I don’t feel I need to defend myself to other people. I often end conversations with, “That’s nice, I’m not interested.”

I know what drew my mom to the Episcopal church was that is was similar to the Catholic church, and she didn’t feel welcome in the Catholic church after she divorced her first husband.

It was frustrating as a child coming to the Catholic church, after having first communion at the Episcopal church at about 4 years old, then being told you can’t anymore. I actually cried and was heartbroken I couldn’t receive Jesus. But it was a good thing, I didn’t fully understand the Eucharist yet.
 
Thank you all for the kind responses. I actually have to runs some errands right now but keep the replies coming. When I have a little more time, I’ll review more carefully and post any further questions I may have.

Thanks again!
 
As a convert, one phrase that I found very helpful when I was confronted with an argument that seemed to make sense or a question that I didn’t know the answer was to admit that I didn’t know ( humility ) but that I would be glad to find out the Church’s position and why it held that and get back to them. The tough part is with teenagers. It’s the bullying. I’m sure you have so warn them. Also, any tapes by Scott Hahn or Patrick Madrid. Or Catholism vs Fundementalism by Keating. They need to be “armed” going into these discussions.
 
Cariethra said:
It was frustrating as a child coming to the Catholic church, after having first communion at the Episcopal church at about 4 years old, then being told you can’t anymore. I actually cried and was heartbroken I couldn’t receive Jesus. But it was a good thing, I didn’t fully understand the Eucharist yet.
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Awww. :hug1:

I had a similar experience, though in a Reformed setting. My family had previously attended churches that practiced “open communion,” and then we switched to a church that allowed only those who were baptized and preferably a member of their church. I realize why this was necessary, but it was still very painful at the time.
 
I am a Baptist turned Heathen who converted to Catholicism. I come from a particularly anti-Catholic family. Ditto what other say about using social relationships and lively worship services to draw people away. Every time I go to church with my family, I am stunned by the band up where the alter and crucifix should be. It can be quite exciting, but never do I leave with the sense of peace that pervades my soul when I attend mass.

Although I am in my 40s, they are convinced I am on the road to hell and trying to get me back. Here are some of the things I hear about, all of which might be said to your teenagers…

The Roman Catholic Church is a cult and it has brainwashed you.
You aren’t reading God’s word.
You are worshipping Mary. This is idolatry and goes against God’s word.
God has already forgiven you. You should not have to confess your sins to the priest.
You are a slave to the church and its Traditions, not our Lord Jesus Christ.

Try not to worry about all of this too much and instead focus on teaching your children about the faith. Someone else mentioned the Eucharist. I really believe that people would never, ever leave the Catholic church if they know in their soul that when we receive communion that it really is the body, blood, soul and divinity of our Lord. If you believe that, you will always sense that something is missing in these other churches. I would encourage you to focus on that point with your children. They may wander off. If they do, pray for them. It will work itself out.
 
Many great replies already…
I have only two pieces of advice to offer.
  1. the best defense is a good offense. - Make sure you children know the faith. Encourage them to ask questions and to understand the “why” of something and not just the “what”.
  2. If they are approached and if they are interested in going to visit another Church - Go with them. See for yourself what is being taught…especially in regards to their view of the Catholic Church. Then you can research any errors in understanding and share this with your children and possibly even with the members of the other church.
Some of these other communions have things that are quite attractive to teens and young adults. Modern music and lights, animated pastors and speakers, youth groups etc. These are things that teens are naturally attracted to and they are not bad things in themselves.
But what needs to occur is that the meat be separated from the fluff. What can another Church offer that the Catholic Church cannot…What can the Catholic Church offer that another church cannot…The answer to that question makes the Catholic Church the winner hands down.

Peace
James
 
Country_Gal said:
Protestants understand the human need for fellowship and belonging much better than Catholics. That’s essentially why my family left the Church, my older daughter got disillusioned by the fact that there was no life in the Church, it had allowed all religious ed to die, no youth group, it was only a place you went to go to Mass because you have to.

I had made every effort, but lived too far away from any other church. There was too much bickering between various factions in the local church, an older, introverted priest, and a breakdown of any attempt to reach out and support young people.
Click to expand...
I can certainly sympathize, although here in the 'burbs things aren’t so stark.

My generation is a lost generation as far as proper catechesis. Things are improving, but I can tell you that I didn’t learn about Catholicism until I was in my late 30’s, maybe even early 40’s.

A (now) friend who ran a Catholic bookstore ran an Advent Bible Study at our Church one year (about 12 years ago). I loved it, and campaigned hard with our priest to have a continuing Bible Study. He turned it around on me so that I found myself volunteering to run one. I’ll tell you, the BEST way to learn something is to teach it. I’ve been doing it for 12 years or so now, and it’s amazingly informative.

What I’m saying is: if there is no group for you to join, start one.

BTW, we use Catholic Scripture Studies. It’s fabulous!
 
Avdima said:
I am not Catholic nor Protestant not even really “Christian” but I happen to have been to many churches and the one thing many Protestant groups have over Catholics in general here in the States is that they seek you out for fellowship.

When I was a young lad and had interest in finding religion, it was the Baptists and Pentecostals who would go out of the way to send someone out to pick me up for church and youth groups, not to say when I went to Catholic churches they were not polite and friendly but the protestants were much more willing to go the extra mile for a lost 9 year old kid.

And many of my friends in Baptist and Pentecostal youth groups were cradle Catholics or other mainline Churches that did not find the RCC or their Mainline Church engaging enough to continue attending.

When I was interested in Catholicism the laypeople and Priests I met with were really nice and inviting I even went to RCIA classes.

I do not really know if it a tactic but the sense of fellowship and love I got from Protestants was a bit above and beyond what I got from the Catholics.
Click to expand...
I think you are on to something here.
 
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