Question about a priest

[Katie1723]

tamccrackine:

…The priest isn’t just HER priest… it’s a military community in which I was heavily involved in up until May of this year …!

The priest is indeed HER priest as he is who she chooses to talk to. All I am saying is that you can be a friend, as she obviously needs that. But there comes a times and place where you , even as a friend don’t belong. This is one of them. Your military community is fortunate that you were there for them. What happened?

Confession or not, I guess I feel that there are things that are strictly between "my " priest and me. After all, if I told the priest something, I certainly wouldn’t want him telling anyone else. That would be gossip, wouldn’t it? And we all know that that is something that a good Catholic doesn’t indulge in.

And If I told a friend something in confidence, I would be mortified to know she/he went back to MY priest and said anything, regardless of what I told her.
~ Kathy ~

 

[tamccrackine]

Katie1723:

The priest is indeed HER priest as he is who she chooses to talk to. All I am saying is that you can be a friend, as she obviously needs that. But there comes a times and place where you , even as a friend don’t belong. This is one of them. Your military community is fortunate that you were there for them. What happened?

I moved. That happens with us military folk… we move frequently. She also begrudingly talked to this priest as she was afraid he’d be conservative and tell her not to allow a vasectomy. She knew of another priest and his liberal views and she was waiting to hear from him. So you can just imagine the sheer happiness she showed when she came calling me to gloat to me that he said it was ok. She was ready to “obey” the priest but since he said it was ok, she’s excited.

Katie1723:

Confession or not, I guess I feel that there are things that are strictly between "my " priest and me. After all, if I told the priest something, I certainly wouldn’t want him telling anyone else. That would be gossip, wouldn’t it? And we all know that that is something that a good Catholic doesn’t indulge in.

I didn’t engage myself or my former priest in gossip. I did ask him general questions and to be honest, I asked if I have a valid next step to take with her to see how to guide her in accordance with Church teaching. I didn’t judge, blame or burden either her or him in the letter to him with condescension, belittling or accusations. And a good Catholic would question a priest if he’s teaching against the Church. To give a bit of insight… I did tell him my friend is having a problem accepting this pregnancy and wants to ensure she’s not ever going to get pregnant by her husband ever again and looking to have him get a vasectomy. I told him that she and I understand it’s against Church teachings and I’ve tried to guide her to the truth, I know she knows the truth, but is there anything more that I can do to help her see it? I never admitted to him that I know of what he told her because I didn’t want to come across as accusing him. I genuinely didn’t want to “bait” him into discussing what they discussed, rather I asked an honest question of what more could I do to lead my friend to make the right choice.

Katie1723:

And If I told a friend something in confidence, I would be mortified to know she/he went back to MY priest and said anything, regardless of what I told her.~ Kathy ~

Just because I moved doesn’t make my relationship with this priest any less significant. I understand and respect your concern. I guess I just see it differently and I’m not afraid to question a priest that is telling couples it’s ok to go against Church teachings. I love my friend dearly and I know that I’m pretty upset that a priest is telling her it’s ok to sin for convienence sake. She was ready and willing to obey him if he told her no to the vasectomy.