Question about birth control and Catholicism

[1ke]

I’m sorry, I misunderstood you! You’re right I apologize, I did speak with some hyperbole. Ovulation can not occur anytime, what I meant was that my hormone imbalance and other conditions prevent the common pre-ovulatory signs from taking place. I also false ovulate all of the time so the post-luteal phase is not safe either for avoiding conception. The only thing that we would be able to do is have follicular monitoring every single cycle to be able to confirm ovulation without a doubt but that is not feasible!

Wow, i’m so sorry to hear that. that is indeed a heavy cross to bear. Prolonged abstinence may be necessary. I hope that the doctors can figure something out for you.

 

[Anon1993]

I appreciate your kind message, but I honestly don’t know the answer to my question. I know that the church makes exceptions to certain things depending on the situation. I know the church teaches about the beauty of marital intimacy and the importance of that, and that it’s not just about having babies. I know that my marriage is suffering because of this and that is not something Jesus wants. Ultimately, our stance on not using ABC is based on being open to life and not selfishly withholding any parts of our bodies/fertility from our spouses. My husband and I are very open to life, foster parents/ in the process of adoption, and can’t possibly withhold fertility from one another when it doesn’t exist.

 

[1ke]

I know that the church makes exceptions to certain things depending on the situation.

For disciplinary things, yes. Such as fasting or abstaining from meat on Fridays.

The Church refers to contraception and direct sterilization as intrinsic evils. Grave matter against the sixth commandment. These are not things that have exceptions. They are doctrinal, not disciplinary.

What the Church does allow is therapeutic intervention for diseased or damaged states where infertility is the side effect, not principally intended. The side effect can be tolerated for the sake of the treatment of disease.

For example, a hysterectomy for a damaged uterus versus a tubal ligation or vasectomy for birth control. Taking hormonal pills for a treatment or endometriosis versus taking pills to prevent pregnancy. Radiation for cancer that makes someone sterile.

What we cannot do is directly intend to prevent pregnancy through contraception or sterilization.

I know this is a hard teaching. And can be hard to live faithfully.

 

[Werbenjagermanjensen]

Ovulation can not occur anytime, what I meant was that my hormone imbalance and other conditions prevent the common pre-ovulatory signs from taking place. I also false ovulate all of the time so the post-luteal phase is not safe either for avoiding conception. The only thing that we would be able to do is have follicular monitoring every single cycle to be able to confirm ovulation without a doubt but that is not feasible!

My wife has PCOS and that describes her fertility signs. Methods of fertility awareness will not work because it will identify the signs of a false ovulation or ramping up to ovulation but not identify when ovulation actually occurs. OPK strips are not going to be accurate, the only thing that identifies ovulation accurately will be blood testing or transvaginal ultrasounds.

For us, there are 2-3 times a year where ovulation occurs so the odds are that NFP would work, depending on how you define “work”, but it would work as well as reading tea leaves or rolling dice. You can’t really count on anecdotal evidence of couples using NFP because many believe they are using NFP when they are in reality simply infertile or missing ovulatory cycles simply by chance. You can’t use contraception but if your doctor determines you need hormones to treat your symptoms there is no moral problem with using them.

 

[TheLittleLady]

My wife has PCOS and that describes her fertility signs.

Dr Hilgers has great success with surgical treatment for PCOS.

 

[TechieGuy]

The official teaching is that artificial birth control or sterilization of either partner is never licit even in difficult situations such as yours.

In practice, it has been my experience that some priests will either advise you to ‘pray and listen to your conscience’ or will tell you that the teachings are for the general case of fertile, healthy bodies but that for infertile or post-menopausal couples, the requirement that all intimate acts end in the way that is ordered towards procreation is not applicable.

There are some that say that those priests are wrong and that following that advice imperils your immortal soul. They may be right.

Among the things you and your spouse will have to sort out for yourselves are:

Do you believe that this teaching of The Church is true and applies to you?

Are you willing to live in accordance with that teaching if you do believe it to be true and applies to you.

Also, some people have been known to take the approach of engaging in what they believe to be sinful behavior, but making frequent recourse to Confession.

Some argue that this is a presumption on God’s grace and - once again - imperils your mortal soul.

It’s a tough situation…

 

[Werbenjagermanjensen]

Dr Hilgers has great success with surgical treatment for PCOS.

Why though? It’s an invasive surgery with a possibility of complications. There is only a small number of women who use NaPro with the jury still out on success and complications. There are a lot more women that deal with PCOS symptoms with birth control pills. Better to deal with the devil that you know than the one that you don’t. It’s not a treatment we would even consider apart from its association with the Catholic church.

 

[TheLittleLady]

If I suffered from PCOS, I would prefer treatment that has results to reverse the condition instead of taking hormonal BCPs that simply mask the symptoms. I’ve been anti hormonal BC way before I was ever Catholic, so, I can talk about this for a long time and I do not want to drag the OP’s question off topic.

You might find this article of interest:

https://www.naprotechnology.com/surgical.htm

And you might want to read the book “Sweetening The Pill”

 

[armywife20]

I am so sorry to hear about your difficulties. My history is 22 years married and open to pregnancy, 8 pregnancies, 4 miscarriages, 3 Napro surgeries, and children ranging from 20 - 1. Lots of infertility.

I understand that you have tried lots of Napro. I make the suggestion that you contact Dr. Hilgers’ office. Regarding your fertility, the doctor may be able to help you figure yours out better. (Please be aware that one 7 month course to learn Dr. Hilgers’ techniques is all that is required to be an NFPMC. If the doctor has not been performing surgical Napro nor has done an internship with him, that doctor may not be as qualified.

Also, and the main reason I think you should call them, you could reach out to Sr. Renee in the Center for NaproEthics. As an expert in the field and working with the FC community, she may be able to help you brainstorm other ways to navigate this part of your life.

Again, I am sorry that you have even had to experience this. It is very difficult to move from wanting children so very badly to deciding that you need to avoid pregnancy - even when you want a baby.