Question about Confession

[Mary_Ellen]

Eve believed the devil and made the choice to sin, something as simple as eating a particular fruit that God told her not to because she thought God’s rule was unreasonable, she thought she could judge good and evil on her own. The result of that seemingly ‘just me’ sin led to the fall of all mankind.

One of the results of that original sin is our concupiscence, our tendency towards sin. Though baptism returns to us the sanctifying grace lost through the sin of Adam and Eve the stain of that sin remains and we still think we can judge for ourselves good and evil. God has given us guidance in this area through his graces, natural law, the writings of scripture, and the teachings of the Church.

It is our responsibility to develop a well-formed conscience. To do this we must know and decide to follow the guidance He has given us. The clearest guidance comes through the magisterium of the Church.

A sincere conscience is not the same as a well-formed conscience. You already know the teaching of the Church in whatever matter it is that you are referring but you have chosen to reject it. In choosing to reject the teaching of the Church you are rejecting the guidance that God has provided, you are rejecting God’s command. Like Adam and Eve you are making your own judgment as to what is good or evil.

You know that what you are doing is wrong in the eyes of the Church and in the eyes of God yet you persist in your sin because it doesn’t ‘feel’ wrong. Our faith journey goes nowhere if it is based on feelings and not on faith. Following our feelings just leads to a life of the senses and is based on worldly values but we are called to live not in this world but to live for the next world. If Jesus had just followed His feelings He would never have submitted Himself to the Cross and there would have been no passion, no death, and no resurrection.

Even if you go to confession at this point it would be invalid because you have no intention to stop whatever it is you are doing - you have no ‘firm purpose of amendment.’ You must confess your sins, have contrition (which is not necessarily a feeling), and have a firm purpose of amendment. While there are numerous sources on-line that can explain why whatever sin you are referring to is wrong, and how it affects the entire Body of Christ (others) you may want to make an appointment with a priest to discuss this specific matter with him.

 

[Bookcat]

Of course one must correct errors , but a human being must always obey the certain judgment of his conscience.

“the certain judgment of ones conscience” is a very theologically rich phrase.

Often people confuse conscience with what they want or what they do not want to avoid or with their feelings or their wishes…

 

[Bookcat]

Of course one must correct errors .

a good reading for us all…

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?p=11306730#post11306730

 

[Dancer1409]

You know that what you are doing is wrong in the eyes of the Church and in the eyes of God yet you persist in your sin because it doesn’t ‘feel’ wrong. Our faith journey goes nowhere if it is based on feelings and not on faith. Following our feelings just leads to a life of the senses and is based on worldly values but we are called to live not in this world but to live for the next world. If Jesus had just followed His feelings He would never have submitted Himself to the Cross and there would have been no passion, no death, and no resurrection.

I don’t think it’s wrong in the eyes of God. I’ve tried looking up why it is a sin but I can’t find anything other than there is a possibility it could get out of hand. That could apply to a lot of things that aren’t sins also though.

 

[Bookcat]

I don’t think it’s wrong in the eyes of God. I’ve tried looking up why it is a sin but I can’t find anything other than there is a possibility it could get out of hand. That could apply to a lot of things that aren’t sins also though.

God did not simply leave us to our own lights (which are darkened by the fall of original sin, by personal sins and by society etc) -but formed a Church. Jesus formed a Church and gave that Church authority to Teach. And such is part of the Churches’ mission.

As Jesus said: “He who hears you hears me.”

What Church teaches as wrong -sinful -is sinful. Of course our life is not founded only on no’s --rather it is a great Yes!

Our Yes in our profession of Faith -our Baptism - our yes to Christ involves a yes to all that the Church Teaches in its various forms and according to the kind of teaching.

(now could someone be misinformed as to what the Church teaches? sure -someone could think that the Church teaches that eating any meat on Sundays is sinful -they would be incorrect and need to correct their understanding.)

 

[Brendan_64]

I don’t think it’s wrong in the eyes of God. I’ve tried looking up why it is a sin but I can’t find anything other than there is a possibility it could get out of hand. That could apply to a lot of things that aren’t sins also though.

You’ve already accepted in this post above that it is a sin when you say, “I’ve tried looking up why it is a sin”.

As a Catholic you are bound to accept all that the Church teaches. If the Church teaches that it is a sin, then it is a sin. You know that the Church teaches that it is a sin, yet you maintain that it isn’t sinful because you don’t think it is a sin. By doing this you are holding yourself up to be a higher authority on this than Christ’s Church on Earth. That would seem to be a very dangerous position to take.

 

[Dancer1409]

You’ve already accepted in this post above that it is a sin when you say, “I’ve tried looking up why it is a sin”.

Like I said I don’t think it is. I probably should have worded it better but what I meant was " I tried looking up why the church teaches it is a sin". I honestly don’t understand why the church says it is a sin.

 

[DAML72]

Like I said I don’t think it is. I probably should have worded it better but what I meant was " I tried looking up why the church teaches it is a sin". I honestly don’t understand why the church says it is a sin.

Then pray for the Holy Spirit to instruct you.

 

[Vico]

Matthew 5, 29-30, Our Lord said:29 If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one of your members than to have your whole body thrown into Gehenna. 30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one of your members than to have your whole body go into Gehenna.

Footnote: * No sacrifice is too great to avoid total destruction in Gehenna.*

 

[Incomplete]

Like I said I don’t think it is. I probably should have worded it better but what I meant was " I tried looking up why the church teaches it is a sin". I honestly don’t understand why the church says it is a sin.

It seems to me that this would be something worth discussing with your confessor. It doesn’t have to be in context of confession. In fact, if you don’t care and don’t plan to stop, there probably is no point to confessing it. (I note that in an earlier post you said you think it’s venial at best; if you really think it’s venial, you should still try to stop. We are called to try to stop all sin. And while that might be impossible, we still make our best effort.)

But talking to your priest might help you to understand this particular sin, and sin in general.

Remember the Church has been here a long time and we have had some very intelligent people within it. Just because you do not understand doesn’t mean it isn’t a sin. It is a good thing to try to understand, though.

 

[BiffRuffle]

I honestly don’t understand why the church says it is a sin.

Two points:

1. Doesn’t matter if you understand or not, just believe - nowhere does scripture say ‘without understanding we cannot please God’, but ‘without faith we cannot please God.’ So, you, and all Catholics (myself included - I struggle with following church teachings, too, like everyone else) need to give the assent of faith - ‘I believe this!’ and then, through prayer and learning, attempt to understand. As the Church is our mother, and a loving one at that, what she tells and instructs us is for our own good - a child may not understand why he/she shouldn’t touch a hot stove, but the child better not do it or he/she will get badly injured.

2)Why not post a question along the lines of “I don’t understand why [insert sin here] is a sin. Can someone help explain?” It’s one thing to be ignorant of something (no one knows everything) - it’s quite another to willfully remain ignorant and avoid learning.

 

[Dancer1409]

2)Why not post a question along the lines of “I don’t understand why [insert sin here] is a sin. Can someone help explain?” It’s one thing to be ignorant of something (no one knows everything) - it’s quite another to willfully remain ignorant and avoid learning.

I’m thinking about it but I’m a bit nervous about the negative reactions I’ll get as it is an issue that is very stereotyped and misunderstood.

 

[sjays]

I’m thinking about it but I’m a bit nervous about the negative reactions I’ll get as it is an issue that is very stereotyped and misunderstood.

Here in public may not be the best place for you to open yourself up on this matter. But this should not discourage you from finding a pastor you can trust, to openly share your feelings on this sin and be vulnerable and open enough to accept whatever teaching he gives you.

Priests have heard it all, so you need not fear being honest about your situation and exactly why you feel it is not a sin in your case. Go with the hope and expectation of the Holy Spirit working through his minister to compassionately guide you in the way of the Lord.

Peace be with you and God Bless.

 

[BiffRuffle]

To echo sjays, I have yet to meet a priest who has not said ‘I’ve never met anyone worse than me in confession.’ If you make an appointment, or even show up to mass early (during the week, if possible - he’ll be less busy and there’ll be fewer people looking for his attention) and just ask him if you can talk to him in private, or even just ask to go to confession, and just talk to him.

I spent about 15 years of my life addicted to pornography and masturbation, and I have never gotten any negative reaction from any priest. The priests are there to help YOU. As one local priest told me, they get more out of hearing confessions than the penitent does,

 

[smichhertz]

Like I said I don’t think it is. I probably should have worded it better but what I meant was " I tried looking up why the church teaches it is a sin". I honestly don’t understand why the church says it is a sin.

Hi again Dancer1409,

Have you been praying the Holy Spirit consistently? I’d recommend a good 15 minutes a day in front of the Blessed Sacrament asking for the Holy Spirit to inspire your mind. You could also do a novena to the Holy Spirit. There’s one that starts in the days leading up to Pentecost Sunday.

Have you been attending classes to try and deepen your understanding? Adult education classes of some kind? Just “looking it up” can often times get you in more trouble because there’s a lot of misinformation out there.

Have you been seeing a priest about this? Make an appointment and share your struggles with the priest and see what he has for suggestions.

When’s the last time you went on a retreat? Often times retreats are a great way to get away from the daily grind and grow closer to God.

Try a few of those things and see if it helps!

 

[Brendan_64]

Like I said I don’t think it is.

But it is not the individual that determines what is and what is not a sin. Whether or not you think it is a sin, does not determine whether or not it is a sin. If the Church teaches that it is a sin then it is a sin. The Church was established by Christ and teaches with Christ’s authority. If the Church teaches something then it does so with the authority of Christ. It is not for individuals to put themselves above that authority.

If the Church teaches that something is sinful, then it is sinful.

 

[dchezik]

It is not down to you whether or not something is a mortsl sin or not. If the Church teaches that something is sinful, then it is sinful, whether or not you agree. We are not our own Magisterium the definition of what is and what id not sin is not open to personal interpretation. You must confess it

This seems odd, Didn’t the church at one time teach it was a mortal sin to read the books on the Index Librorum Prohibitorum – like Darwin, Copernicus, and Freud? Didn’t it recently offer a belated apology for the Inquisition’s trial of Galileo?

Do they still say masturbation is a sin? I’m not sure what they say is a sin today is going to be a sin tomorrow. They have become more liberal in recent years.

 

[Joan_M]

Joan M;11930183:

No sin “only hurts” you when you commit it. You are a part of the Body of Christ."

I can think of a few right now self harm, witholding a serious sin in confession…

Dancer1409, you clearly did not read everything I wrote, or you dismissed it. We are a part of the Body of Christ. Every sin committed hurts the entire body.

It also appears to me that you came here to hear affirmation and are not prepared to change your mind. Being obstinate in the face of advice and the Church comes from pride.

 

[Brendan_64]

This seems odd, Didn’t the church at one time teach it was a mortal sin to read the books on the Index Librorum Prohibitorum – like Darwin, Copernicus, and Freud?

Where did you get that from?

Didn’t it recently offer a belated apology for the Inquisition’s trial of Galileo?

That is true, but the fact that people within the Church have made errors (humans are not perfect) does not affect Church teaching.

Do they still say masturbation is a sin?.

Yes that is still the case. The Church does teach that masturbation is a mortal sin, along with contraception, extra-marital sex, and homosexual acts. Nothing has changed on these issues as regards Church teaching.

I’m not sure what they say is a sin today is going to be a sin tomorrow.

Yes, the Church does maintain that what is and what is not a sin does not change relative to the times we live in. Sin is sin and truth is truth.

They have become more liberal in recent years.

That is a misconception, the Church’s teachings have not changed. The fact that many Catholics seem to ignore this does not change the fact that Church teaching has not changed.

 

[Dancer1409]

Dancer1409;11930235:

Dancer1409, you clearly did not read everything I wrote, or you dismissed it. We are a part of the Body of Christ. Every sin committed hurts the entire body.

It also appears to me that you came here to hear affirmation and are not prepared to change your mind. Being obstinate in the face of advice and the Church comes from pride.

I did read everything you wrote, I’m just not sure I agree with it. I don’t see how every action someone takes affects the whole church. I agree that some things a person can do affects everyone else but not everything.

Also I did not come here affirmation or out of pride. I was simply wondering what advice or ideas other people had on how to proceed. I have taken some peoples advice and am trying to figure it out. I’m sorry it appears that I am being prideful. It is definitely not my intention.