H
hausofferni
Guest
Not sure if this is the correct section, but At this point in time, for some reason, I don’t like prayer. At all. I still pray as some spiritual books I’m reading like the life of St Catherine, say that we should persevere in prayer during times of spiritual dryness, but this is like tough. I’m about to pray the rosary after writing this, and I spent about an hour wasting time and idling around just to not pray it. I wake up in the morning, and I just wanna get my morning prayers over with, and I feel so bad because I don’t mean to be this way, I wasn’t always is way, but I feel like since I’m trying to get closer to God, I don’t know. I dread when it’s 3 pm because I know it’s time to pray the chaplet of divine mercy, and I feel so bad for feeling this way. I just feel so dead, like while praying the chaplet I felt like I was carrying this huge load and I couldn’t even concentrate on the chaplet. Are my prayers still heard? I tell Our Lord that I don’t wanna pray and that I don’t feel like it, so that he knows that I’m still trying, same with Our Lady. Does God know I don’t mean to feel this way? Is it wrong that I’ve thought, “let me just pray to get it over with” when I know it’s something I should love. But it’s so weird because last week I prayed and i was fine! I felt THE LOVE after prayer. I honestly don’t know how the saints did it to pray for 12-15 hours at a time, one can only imagine. And it’s not like I wanna finish prayer just to go and shop or be on my phone, no, I finish praying and all I wanna do is read spiritual books, especially about the lives of the saints, or come onto Catholic answers. I don’t know what to do.