Question for Catholics who've "come back" to the Church

[crcath]

Another thing that upon refelection, really made it easy for me to return to the Catholic Church is that my entire family is Catholic, so in a way, I just felt like I was missing something.

My mom’s family, my dad’s family, and my step-dad’s family, all are Catholic. Are there some in the family, espcially amongst my siblings who aren’t regular Mass goers or who don’t believe at all? Sure, there are, and probably every family has a few.

That’s an interesting point, garn. Our family on both sides is all Catholic also, so I hope that influences our son in the future (but none of his wife’s family are, unfortunately). Not all in ours are regular Mass goers either, but I pray that the way he was raised and the examples he saw will all come back to him as the Holy Spirit helps prod him some day.
Peace and God’s love!

 

[Estevao]

1. “Catholicism and Fundamentialism” by Karl Keating. Excellent book. I read this while I was spending the summer away from a protestant “bible-only” church, which was a bit too insular for my liking, but I was too timid to admit it (this was during a tough time in my life). It really showed me how the catholic Church stuck to the bible more faithfully than the selective quotations of this particular protestant church to “prove” their theology.
2. Reading the bible in its entirety. Not just selectively through some “bible study” that rails against the “traditions of men”, or tries to argue that the Catholic church is “unbiblical”.

I don’t really consider myself a catholic who “came home”. I was baptized at 5 years old and received communion when I was 7, but I never received any training in the faith. When I went off to college at the age of 18, I was proselytized by this bible-only church and led through a series of studies. This served as my introduction to Christianity. Unfortunately this church used to be a cult and is still a very insular organization with some cult-like traits. But I was too timid, as I said, to really question it. I just went along with it because I had a certain longing to belong to a church.

But during the summer after 1st year I was able to go on a vacation away from this very pressuring church and spend time reading the bible and that book by Karl Keating. I eventually had to explain to the person who had lead me through all these “bible studies” why I was leaving, which was a bit of an odd experience, because before then they were very close to me, they were very nosy about what I was doing, and they “love-bombed me” (which for a guy who was going through some troubles created a dependance) but I haven’t heard from them in 2 years now, and when I run into them in public, they pretend not to know me. I think I was “marked” by them, as it says in Romans 16, but I’m not sure.

I can’t say I’ve had an epiphany in regards to “coming home”. Some people have really made an impact - my priest, my RCIA teacher, another RCIA teacher - but I’ve just been falling more and more in love with the Church. Little by little this love is confirmed as long as I put in the effort to join into fellowship with other Catholics (although I will admit this comes more easily in some evangelical churches), and as I learn about the Catholic faith. I used to think I was a lapsed Catholic, but never really knew the Church.

“Great and ancient beauty, how late have I loved thee!”

P.s., I kind of consider myself lucky in a way that my parents didn’t try and teach me about Catholicism. I might have rebelled against it, as is the nature of teens to do. A lot of the cradle catholic I meet have families that function very well and lovingly, which I think will be an absolute necessity if I am to teach my kids about religion and not have them rebel into internet atheism and hedonism as so many young do these days.

 

[crcath]

For me, I had been away for approx 20yrs.

What got me back was losing my dear Mum. Then, a year later my dear Dad passed to be with The Lord!

I went through a terrible time. Depression and anxiety. The only thing that helped me was church. I am still on mess, 9 years on but my faith has increased 2000% in the last 6 months!

I have not missed mass since my parents passed away. I now have a gorgeous 6 year old daughter and she is awesome.

I love our Lord so much. I could never live without my faith and the church.

Very sorry to hear about the sad loss of both your parents within a year’s time, ajecphotos. Must have been horrible to experience. I’m so glad the Church was there for you, though, and that your Faith has increased so much! And your beautiful daughter is yet another glorious gift from God. I agree - I could never live without my Faith and the Catholic Church either.
Thanks so much for your (name removed by moderator)ut, and may Our Lord and His Blessed Mother continue to bless you always!

 

[garn9173]

That’s an interesting point, garn. Our family on both sides is all Catholic also, so I hope that influences our son in the future (but none of his wife’s family are, unfortunately). Not all in ours are regular Mass goers either, but I pray that the way he was raised and the examples he saw will all come back to him as the Holy Spirit helps prod him some day.
Peace and God’s love!

I came back totally on my own with no “nagging” from family about returning, that’s just something to keep in mind. Who knows, he just may stumble upon one of the Catholics Come Home TV commerical

 

[crcath]

I stopped attending church after my first communion. Then it was just rarely going to mass. I grew older, angrier, bitter, and confused teenager. I started to be interested in God more. Last year I got really sick with food poisoning, suffered anxiety attacks, and thought I had ‘commited the unforgivable sin’. I was basically in a loop on my phone and computer ‘researching’ if I had committed it, from evangelical web pages, protestant videos, and blatantly anti catholic websites, they just fed my fears. I was relying on feelings saying the ‘sinners prayer’ and it would ‘not feel right’, I took very short comfort in once saved always saved, while being mentally harassesed by blasphemous thoughts. I watched a protestant video, an hour long about the unforgivable sin and it just shattered me. It made no sense to me. I started to attend Mass to ask God to forgive me. Then I wandered onto here, got some help from lovely people and others who suffered the same. I read more about my faith that this IS the one true church. Apostolic succession, the Sacraments, Peter is the rock, you are NOT ‘once saved always saved’ that is false comfort, someone could live all their lives thinking they are saved and continue in sin, up until judgement day.

I went back to confession after 6-7 years. I’ve never felt better.
My scrupulosity rarely comes back.

So glad to hear you came home to the Catholic Church, Maria! Thanks for sharing. We have an amazing Church, and I pray our son will realize that one day as you did. The “once saved, always saved” line from the other churches always struck me as very strange, too.
God bless!

 

[crcath]

The thing i missed on my first service as an “offical” run-a-way was the the Truth. He just wasn’t there. Trying to prove my new fellowship as the true church from scripture showed me that the Catholic Church is the true Church.
My logic dictated to me that if the eucharist is true then everything else has be. Otherwise i couldn’t even accept the Eucharist as being what it is.

Thanks for your (name removed by moderator)ut, fbl9. I hope our son sees that excellent logic as well - either soon or at least sometime in the future. The sooner the better!
God bless.

 

[fbl9]

Thanks for your (name removed by moderator)ut, fbl9. I hope our son sees that excellent logic as well - either soon or at least sometime in the future. The sooner the better!
God bless.

i do hope your son realizes what he is leaving behind. In my case i struggled with sin (still do) and i blamed the Church cause i was sinning.
What reasons has your son given for joining his wife’s fellowship?

 

[crcath]

i do hope your son realizes what he is leaving behind. In my case i struggled with sin (still do) and i blamed the Church cause i was sinning.
What reasons has your son given for joining his wife’s fellowship?

Hi fbl9. He says he feels like he only really “knew of” God through all of his years of growing up in a Catholic home with the Catholic Church and all of the Sacraments but didn’t really “know” Him. Says that after living on his own and not being a good Catholic that now the other church makes him feel like he really “knows” God. I get the feeling he wants baptism there to kind of wash away the sins of when he was away from the Catholic Church so perhaps he can start over with a clean slate the “easier way” (i.e.without having to receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation in the Catholic Church…). Just my impression - he didn’t say that. It’s probably also much easier for him to go to his wife’s church since she participates often there, and he would have to attend a Catholic Church by himself (again, just my thoughts, he didn’t say that) - and again would not have to confess his sins to a Priest if he switched over.
I don’t know if he’s blaming the Catholic Church for his past sins as you had, but I really feel as if he’s taking the “easy way out” for some reason. Does that in any way relate to your experiences? Any thoughts on what might be helpful in this case?
Thanks so much.

 

[Seeker1961]

Hi fbl9. He says he feels like he only really “knew of” God through all of his years of growing up in a Catholic home with the Catholic Church and all of the Sacraments but didn’t really “know” Him. Says that after living on his own and not being a good Catholic that now the other church makes him feel like he really “knows” God. I get the feeling he wants baptism there to kind of wash away the sins of when he was away from the Catholic Church so perhaps he can start over with a clean slate the “easier way” (i.e.without having to receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation in the Catholic Church…). Just my impression - he didn’t say that. It’s probably also much easier for him to go to his wife’s church since she participates often there, and he would have to attend a Catholic Church by himself (again, just my thoughts, he didn’t say that) - and again would not have to confess his sins to a Priest if he switched over.
I don’t know if he’s blaming the Catholic Church for his past sins as you had, but I really feel as if he’s taking the “easy way out” for some reason. Does that in any way relate to your experiences? Any thoughts on what might be helpful in this case?
Thanks so much.

I do understand the idea of “knowing”. That is a common theme that runs through non-denominational churches, and it was attractive to me while I was there.

My mom looks at my time away this way-she believes that God was there the whole time. She believes that there was something I needed to be taught, and the process I took in the church, out of the church and back into the church was something God intended for me. I did learn some things while I was there that I didn’t know-and I have to admit that I LOVED the sermons that were more like college lectures. When we studied the Bible, we really got into it and it brought me to a more deeper relationship with the Scriptures than I had since I was in Catholic school and university studying theology. I would come home from services and dig into the sections we read-researching them on Google. That’s one of the ways I found this site-looking for Catholic interpretations of what we read at the non-demoninational Church. Even after my time away-I still was tied to the Church and wanted to make sure that I what I was hearing in the Non-denominational church didn’t conflict with Church teaching.

When I hit the point where Church teaching and what I was hearing in that church didn’t gel, that’s when I realized I had to go back home.

 

[crcath]

I do understand the idea of “knowing”. That is a common theme that runs through non-denominational churches, and it was attractive to me while I was there.

My mom looks at my time away this way-she believes that God was there the whole time. She believes that there was something I needed to be taught, and the process I took in the church, out of the church and back into the church was something God intended for me. I did learn some things while I was there that I didn’t know-and I have to admit that I LOVED the sermons that were more like college lectures. When we studied the Bible, we really got into it and it brought me to a more deeper relationship with the Scriptures than I had since I was in Catholic school and university studying theology. I would come home from services and dig into the sections we read-researching them on Google. That’s one of the ways I found this site-looking for Catholic interpretations of what we read at the non-demoninational Church. Even after my time away-I still was tied to the Church and wanted to make sure that I what I was hearing in the Non-denominational church didn’t conflict with Church teaching.

When I hit the point where Church teaching and what I was hearing in that church didn’t gel, that’s when I realized I had to go back home.

Thanks for that excellent (name removed by moderator)ut about your experiences, Seeker. It sheds a lot of light on the whole situation in our family. I’m feeling as if many of the non-Catholic churches reach out heavily to the youth of the world via the types of sermons, etc., that they give and all of the bible-reading groups. Sort of like, “Grab those kids out of high school and college and get 'em in here!! We need more people! And more money in the coffers!!!” The born-again church our son attends “requires” 10% tithing… It can be a real challenge for a young married couple to do that, but the pressure is definitely there - I hear it. Perhaps if the Priest at our Church had been younger with more “vibrant” sermons, our son might have felt more compelled to stay… Who knows. There are only so many young Priests to go around. I do know our Church purposely avoids the topic of financial contributions as much as it can, and I appreciate that. It actually makes me feel compelled to give more. But the tithing in the born-again church doesn’t seem to be turning off our son and his wife, although I almost see something akin to brainwashing in it from what they’ve related about it in the past. I try not to think about that gut feeling (and hopefully I’m wrong) because it scares me.
I’m extremely glad you realized that what you were hearing in the other church didn’t gel with the Catholic Church’s teaching and you came home. I pray our son does also!
God bless you always.

 

[crcath]

Of course the Holy Spirit

I was away about 12 years. I attended various Protestant churches during that time and never felt a sense of belonging or of being ‘fed’.

I work with high schoolers preparing for Confirmation and most are ambivalent. 85% of teens confirmed in the Church ultimately leave. That’s a scary stat and although my kids are very young, I wonder how I would/will react when they go through their own spiritual wanderings.

I appreciate my Catholic faith so much more now than I think I could have if I had never left. It know it was hard on my mother when I married outside the Church, but I did come back and that process was important for my spiritual growth. Pray, and pray, and pray, and trust their Father.

Thanks for that advice and (name removed by moderator)ut, AskSeekKnock. I didn’t realize about the 85% statistic. So sad. Definitely makes me feel less alone as a Mother with what’s going on for us. So glad you came “home.” Will definitely keep praying…and trusting in the Father of us all!
God bless always.

 

[crcath]

I grew up in a Catholic household but was never surrounded by holiness. When my parents got divorced and hatred started spewing, I wasn’t surrounded by Love or love either. After years of depression and distance from the Church my pride lead me to meet a supremely holy person who is currently a seminarian in our diocese. He showed me the Love of Christ and that began my journey back.

Thank you for sharing that experience, Andy. I’m very sorry to hear how difficult life must have been growing up for you. Am so glad the Holy Spirit sent you an angel on earth to help bring you back home to the loving Father of us all.
May He continue to bless you always and keep you in his care.

 

[fbl9]

Hi fbl9. He says he feels like he only really **“knew of” **God through all of his years of growing up in a Catholic home with the Catholic Church and all of the Sacraments but didn’t really “know” Him. Says that after living on his own and not being a good Catholic that now the other church makes him feel like he really “knows” God. .

What was he standing in line for? A bite to eat?
No he just thinks he knows God now.
If you want to give your son a challenge have him define the God he knows.
Who is this Jesus he knows is half man half God? All God, What of his will, did He have a human nature of a divine nature.?
iow. toss your son some of the early herisies.
or you could take a oneness pentecostal stance with him and have him prove that wrong.
And his defense comes only from the teachings of his new fellowship.

 

[crcath]

The circumstances of meeting and marrying my wife seemed so inescapably the result of Divine Intervention that I reverted to Catholicism. I never quit believing what the Church taught, but chose to ignore it.

Beautiful to hear that, kkollwitz. Sounds like the ultimate love story in many ways! Thanks for sharing. So happy to hear you let the Holy Spirit do its awesome work in your life. I pray it’s part of the “plan” for our son to listen to the whisperings also and return home to the Church. With God, all things are possible!
God bless you and your wife always.

 

[crcath]

My Dad became Catholic when he was like 28. He left for Protestant churches because he felt they had more enthusiasm for God (which was because of the large amount of purely nominal “Catholics”, and a bad RCIA program). But that’s when he started seriously studying the Bible. He studied it to the point where he could recite 7 books of The Bible off the top of his head. He was active in bible studies and found that the things they taught at the Protestant churches were not supported by The Bible. This is how he came back.

Thanks for sharing that, bobby. So glad your Dad’s enthusiastic bible studies led him home to the Catholic Church! I hope and pray it works the same way for our son and many others out there who may be missing the Universal Church and Communion of Saints!
God bless.

 

[crcath]

I originally converted from the Mormon church when I was 19, but left after suffering some family and personal problems. After being an agnostic, a wiccan, and even trying out the Episcopal church, I realized that nothing could compare to the Catholic Church. I feel like I am part of something so amazing and universal. I love the fact that I can go anywhere in the world and it is the same church. I love the values that my children are learning from the church.

After my grandma died, I felt like she was somehow nudging me towards God. She wasn’t even Catholic, but somehow I feel like she is helping me back to my faith from the afterlife. I also had a dream that my great-grandparents, who were Mormon also, were sitting in a Catholic church. I asked them why they were there, because they weren’t Catholic in their earthly lives. They explained that there is only one Church in the afterlife. I feel very blessed that I have people on the other side helping me.

Thanks so much for sharing that, AshJade. I’m very glad you found the Catholic Church - twice! Also loved your statement that we can go anywhere in the world, and it’s the same Church. Sometimes I forget how amazing that is, and it’s good to be reminded! And the values we teach our children through the Church are so important.
So nice to feel you are blessed with loved ones helping you from the other side, too. I feel that often myself, and it’s an awesome comfort. God is definitely with us in so many ways.Interesting about your dream, too!
May Our Lord bless you always.

 

[crcath]

Two people were praying for me apparently. Not my family sadly but two good persons. I also started to join a group of prayer with Mother Mary.

So here is what i advise to you. Pray Mother Mary and devote yourself in praying the mystery.

Don’t give up hope and prayer for your son! Prayer and fasting is far more efficient then words.

All the best!

Thanks for your (name removed by moderator)ut, Chantal. So glad to hear you had people praying for you and that you joined the Blessed Mother prayer group - all of which I’m sure helped get you back home to the Church.
I truly think you’re right about the prayer and fasting being much more effficient than any words I could tell my son. And I don’t want to hound him about it. I definitely won’t give up my prayers and hope!
God bless.

 

[crcath]

1. “Catholicism and Fundamentialism” by Karl Keating. Excellent book. I read this while I was spending the summer away from a protestant “bible-only” church, which was a bit too insular for my liking, but I was too timid to admit it (this was during a tough time in my life). It really showed me how the catholic Church stuck to the bible more faithfully than the selective quotations of this particular protestant church to “prove” their theology.
2. Reading the bible in its entirety. Not just selectively through some “bible study” that rails against the “traditions of men”, or tries to argue that the Catholic church is “unbiblical”.

I don’t really consider myself a catholic who “came home”. I was baptized at 5 years old and received communion when I was 7, but I never received any training in the faith. When I went off to college at the age of 18, I was proselytized by this bible-only church and led through a series of studies. This served as my introduction to Christianity. Unfortunately this church used to be a cult and is still a very insular organization with some cult-like traits. But I was too timid, as I said, to really question it. I just went along with it because I had a certain longing to belong to a church.

But during the summer after 1st year I was able to go on a vacation away from this very pressuring church and spend time reading the bible and that book by Karl Keating. I eventually had to explain to the person who had lead me through all these “bible studies” why I was leaving, which was a bit of an odd experience, because before then they were very close to me, they were very nosy about what I was doing, and they “love-bombed me” (which for a guy who was going through some troubles created a dependance) but I haven’t heard from them in 2 years now, and when I run into them in public, they pretend not to know me. I think I was “marked” by them, as it says in Romans 16, but I’m not sure.

I can’t say I’ve had an epiphany in regards to “coming home”. Some people have really made an impact - my priest, my RCIA teacher, another RCIA teacher - but I’ve just been falling more and more in love with the Church. Little by little this love is confirmed as long as I put in the effort to join into fellowship with other Catholics (although I will admit this comes more easily in some evangelical churches), and as I learn about the Catholic faith. I used to think I was a lapsed Catholic, but never really knew the Church.

“Great and ancient beauty, how late have I loved thee!”

P.s., I kind of consider myself lucky in a way that my parents didn’t try and teach me about Catholicism. I might have rebelled against it, as is the nature of teens to do. A lot of the cradle catholic I meet have families that function very well and lovingly, which I think will be an absolute necessity if I am to teach my kids about religion and not have them rebel into internet atheism and hedonism as so many young do these days.

Thanks very much for all of that insightful info, Estevao. I truly appreciate it. Will have to look into getting a copy of that book since it sounds like at least my reading it (if not my son’s also) could benefit me in discussions that may come up in the future with him.
I’m real glad you were able to research on your own, find that book, get to know the Catholic Church better, and come home to her. And then come here to CAF and help me, too! God’s Plan is pretty awesome.
I think you’re right about the “fellowship” sometimes coming more easily for some people in non-Catholic churches. Many of them seem to reach out harder to obtain converts, and the “pick and choose” aspect of religion some have can appeal to many, I’m sure. I’m very thankful the Catholic Church has remained true to her tenets even though it may lose her some members who prefer the easier way of the other churches.
Keep up the great work, and God bless you always!

 

[crcath]

I came back totally on my own with no “nagging” from family about returning, that’s just something to keep in mind. Who knows, he just may stumble upon one of the Catholics Come Home TV commerical

Thanks for that (name removed by moderator)ut, garn. We definitely try not to nag much, so we won’t be doing it on this important topic with him. Hoping the quiet example (and his memory of how sad it made us when he told us) - and loving discussion when and if asked will work wonders. I hope he sees one of those commercials, too! I don’t think I’ve ever seen one on tv in our area, but he likely watches different channels than we do and hopefully will see it some day.
God bless!

 

[crcath]

What was he standing in line for? A bite to eat?
No he just thinks he knows God now.
If you want to give your son a challenge have him define the God he knows.
Who is this Jesus he knows is half man half God? All God, What of his will, did He have a human nature of a divine nature.?
iow. toss your son some of the early herisies.
or you could take a oneness pentecostal stance with him and have him prove that wrong.
And his defense comes only from the teachings of his new fellowship.

Hi, fbl. I’m not quite sure what exactly you’re recommending we tell our son. We don’t want to get into an argument with him about this and turn him away even further from the Catholic Church. He said he is keeping an open mind for the future, and if he brings up further discussion on it we’ll definitely do so as lovingly as we possibly can, but I doubt any kind of debate with hard and fast challenges to him would be real effective in this case. It might hurt more than help, especially knowing his personality.
Thanks, and God bless.