Question for those who are (or were) married

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"marriage isn’t hard, life is hard—marriage makes it all worthwhile"my husband & i were married for 16 years & 11 months & that was our motto—whenever we had an argument–he always said “is this worth breaking up a marriage” & then would say something dumb & i would laugh and the argument was over. we enjoyed our time together so much that we started a business together & spent the last 8 years of our life together 24/7—we renewed our wedding vows every tuesday & Phil died on a Tuesday—he was buried on the anniversary of the day we got engaged. God uses our humanity in the supernatural things (life & death). I still renew my wedding vows on Tuesday (it is almost 17 months since he died). I had more love in the 17 years that we were together than most people have in a lifetime, he was a very giving person & always put me first—i was #1 in his life as he was in mine.
I heard a wedding homily shortly after he died & the priest told the newlyweds to put God first, their spouse 2nd & themselves 3rd. whenever they had an argument–to ask the question who was being selfish—i think that is excellent advice as i realized i was probably the selfish one in most of our arguments because phil always gave in to me. he was very patient with me & i was impatient with him often----if i was able to relive my marriage, the one thing that i would try to do is to be more patient & loving, being angry or impatient does not help love to grow
 
Check out some wonderful websites to enrich your marriage. One you can subscribe to and receive regular emails tips on keeping the light alive & flaming in your marriage.

It is www.growthrac.com

Visit Growthtrac’s discussion board
growthtrac.com/boards/
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Pray for your Wife that...

• She will be strong in faith
• She will grow spiritually
• She will spend time in the Word and in prayer
• She will have discernment and revelation
• She will become a mighty woman in God
• She will be a light to others
• She will know God's will and live in it


Read the Article
[growthtrac.com/redirect-80.htm](http://www.growthtrac.com/redirect-80.htm)
 
Another great website site is this one which includes an e-letter with great information. 
[familyministries.org/FirstYearsForever/archive.htm](http://www.familyministries.org/FirstYearsForever/archive.htm)
 
Consider subscribing to a wonderful Christian magazine called Marriage Partnership.
 
If you can, pick up a copy of the May-June 2004 issue of Liguorian Magazine. There is a very inciteful article that I am passing out to the engaged couples we prepare for marriage. The article is “What makes a marriage sacramental?” by Richard R.Gaillardetz Ph.D
Liguorian magazine has a website www.liguorian.org
 
Christ center your marriage. Christ is the truth, the way, and the light. You must first love Christ, then you can love your wife.

You do this by praying together. Say your prayers for each other out loud.

Get and read the book: **Sex and the Sacred City **by Steven Kellmeyer.

Talk about the book with your wife.
 
Great suggestions all.

I would like to say Pray together. Out loud.

My wife and I have been doing that every night. If I’m not there due to travel, I’ll leave her a note with my prayer.

But Pray Together!
 
The idea here is to get your spouse into heaven!!!

Do this a you will have a great marraige.
 
My husband and I were married 37 years ago at a Nuptial High Mass. What I learned is that any time we excluded Christ from our marriage, we got into trouble. As long as he was part of our marriage, even the sorrows were manageable. In a sacramental marriage, even if just one looks to Christ to lead, the marriage is blest. But of course the ideal is a working covenant of three persons.
 
Never, Never argue in front of your children.

Be a team – always work together.

Don’t call each other names.

Go to church together.

Take one day at a time.

Tell your spouse you love them - everyday if possible.
 
If you get hot under the collar and have a bad day…remember, one of you has to die to get out of it. Works for us anyway! 40 years and neither one of us is willing to die. 😛
 
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