Question (mainly) for Converts

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sleeping_gecko

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I’ve posted a few times on the boards, and have, genuinely found this to be a great place to learn about the faith from the mouths (or keyboards, rather) of the faithful!

Anyway, I’m at the point where I’m shifting from the “what-if?” to the “how?” In other words, I’m mostly beyond the “What if God wants me to become Catholic?” stage and moving into the “How’s this all going to work?” stage.

As far as the process of entrance into the Catholic Church, I’ve been talking with a priest for the last few months, so I know basically how that will go (or, at least, my options).

So here’s my question:

How did you bring your conversion up with your family and friends?

If anyone was in a leadership role (of any level) within a Protestant church, your insight would be appreciated, as I’ve been in youth ministry at a Protestant church for the past few years (non-paid, so I’m not losing income, it’s just a matter of leaving gracefully, you could say).

My father and my father-in-law are both conservative, Protestant ministers, one of them pretty much Fundamentalist and the other in a “mainline” church.

I’ve brought the issue up once with my father-in-law, just to let him know what was going on, and it didn’t go too smoothly. I have not yet brought it up directly with my father.

So, have any advice? Did you have a tactful way of bringing the subject up with your Protestant family/friends? Or did you just use the old “Pass the green beans, please. Oh, and I’m Catholic now!” trick? 😛
 
Just a not of clarification:

My wife is not at the same point as I am in this journey, but has been very open to discussion and very supportive of me doing what I believe God wants me to do. We’ve been discussing this all along. It’s only with other family members/friends that we haven’t really discussed it much.
 
I’m not a convert sleeping gecko, but I just wanted to say welcome home 🙂

My fiance pretty much just told them straight out about half way through the RCIA process. There didn’t seem to be much issue for her, even though her mom was a fallen away Catholic who now dislikes any form of organized religion.
 
My husband was a deacon in our small baptist church. I taught Sunday school and helped out with the youth group. We are very joyful with Catholicism, so we just tell people when it is time to tell them. I have a website and blog about my new faith, which I shared with my old friends. Two of them, after reading my website, really were disturbed and got into an email conversation with me. So I kept a rather long email communication with one friend and invited the other over for dinner and tried to explain our faith better to them. Sometimes I come a cross a book or a video I think really appropriate for them I would mail it to them.

So for me I just have joy and complete confidence in Catholicism. I do not wince. I explain, defend and give information. Oh yeah and lots of prayers for my friends.
 
Get Thee to chnetwork.org!

The “Coming Home Network” has *lots of resources *and can connect you with former Protestant clergy who became Catholic. 👍

Hope this helps!

God bless!
 
I came from a Protestant family. I was born and raised in a mainline, “mega-church”. My brother also became an ordained minister at a similar church. My cousin is a pentecostal pastor. Church was always the topic at our family get togethers.

My husband and our 4 kids moved 50 miles away and started searching for another great church that we came from. Long story, short, we ended up finding the beauty and truth in the Catholic Church. I eased the news with my mom in phone conversations, telling her we went to Sunday School classes (instead of saying RCIA). She knew it was Catholic, and kept asking “Are you sure??” But would then turn a deaf ear to my defense and change the subject so fast. My mom was taking it very hard, so that determined how much I would share and hold back. I figured my mom would have told my brother, but she didn’t want to even bring it up to him. So, at the next family gathering, my brother expressed how upset he was with me for not sharing with him or journey. I told him it was such a personal, spiritual decision, I didn’t know how to bring it up without sounding boastful like"Hey! Look what we are doing!!" I wanted to enter the church with complete humility.
During the whole process of RCIA, my family had so many opportunities to ask where we were going to church, but they NEVER asked. And I know they knew, but kept the elephant in the room. So I know what you mean about, “We’re Catholic, pass the green beans”
They still won’t ask any questions regarding our faith.They have their closed-minded opinions about Catholicism and they don’t WANT to know. It makes me sad in a way, but I’m willing to have the conversations if and when they initiate it.
 
Everybody’s conversion experience is different as are the reasons they decided to become Catholic.

I remember when I talked to my former minister I just sort of told him what had been on my thoughts and prayers for a while. I told him it hadn’t been a quick or rash decision and I felt God was leading me to the Catholic Church. To my surprise he admitted to me that he’d thought about the Catholic Church too, but there were several reasons why he couldn’t or wouldn’t join. All the fears I had about the conversation never materialized and it went far better than I could’ve imagined.

Another thing I tried to emphasize to people is that many of the beliefs I had in the Methodist Church could transfer over very well as a Catholic. It wasn’t like I had to do a wholesale beliefs change, in many ways I thought what I believed was finally being fulfilled or made more complete.

Best of luck and welcome home.

ChadS
 
We left a bunch of our Catholic books out on the coffee table, rather by accident actually, and the family noticed them. The Catechism and “All Generations Shall Call Me Blessed” grabbed the interest of my wife’s grandma. The only question I got was, “where did you get this (catechism)?” along with a few warnings to not jump into anything… I’ll go out on a limb and say that the VAST majority of protestants will profess to know nothing about the Catholic Church when confronted by it. A small minority will quote the Jack Chick style stuff. The smallest minority may act rather offended by it, but hopefully they too will come around eventually. After all, they should be able to recognize that you’re only doing the same thing they are, trying to follow Christ wherever he leads, the best way you know how… 👍
 
I had expressed interest in the Catholic Church as few times as a young adult and attended one several times as a single woman in college. When I started to read more and seriously consider RCIA I met my future husband (cradle Catholic) and started to attend mass with him every Sunday.

I was brought up and baptized Southern Baptist. We were very active in the church up until I was halfway through High School. My family never outright told me I shouldn’t go (I had spent a few years exploring many different religions and I think they were just glad to see me focusing on a Christian church) but there have been little comments here and there.

I never outright told them I was converting but did ask them things that would tip them off like 'I need a copy of my baptismal certificate for the class I am taking at St. ______‘s, do you know where I can find it?’ I thought long and hard about inviting them to the Easter Vigil but chickened out. I’m not sure if I would have done it differently given the chance sometimes.

I have had my confirmation certificate in a frame on some wall easily visible to all since shortly after I received it. Since that time we have married and christened our children when they came along. My family never refused to come to any of the events due to them being Catholic.

So I never outright said anything. My father especially hasn’t ever had anything nice to say about the Church and I really didn’t feel like getting talked at (there would not have been a discussion) about it. I think that it has just become a ‘let it be’ type of issue. It does make me happy that my parents have started to attend church services again so we do talk about superficial things like what church event we recently helped with or went to, things like that.

I’m sorry this is so long but hope you have found some use in it. God bless your faith journey!
 
sleeping_gecko said:
How did you bring your conversion up with your family and friends?
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In a natural way, as it is occurring. For the love of all that is holy, don’t keep your journey a secret, and then suddenly spring it on them the day before your Confirmation - that won’t go over very well. Plus, it’s not fair. They have a right to be part of your journey, even if they don’t actually want to become Catholics. They are, after all, part of your life.

Rather, let them in on it as you are experiencing it. You don’t have to tell them “I think I’m going to become a Catholic,” but you can say, “I’ve been making friends with a Catholic priest, and learning a lot of stuff about the Catholic faith that I had never realized, before.”

From there, it’s a natural step to say, “I’ve started attending Mass on Sundays. It’s really interesting how close it is to the worship of the Early Church! Makes you think.”

Then, when you start your RCIA, it won’t come as a shock, and they can all say, “Oh, I saw that coming, even before you did!” 😛 (Don’t correct them.)
If anyone was in a leadership role (of any level) within a Protestant church, your insight would be appreciated, as I’ve been in youth ministry at a Protestant church for the past few years (non-paid, so I’m not losing income, it’s just a matter of leaving gracefully, you could say).
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First, let those in authority or those who have the ability to do something about it, know that you find that your duties are closing in on you, and you don’t have the time or the energy to put into this ministry that you used to. Ask for volunteers to take a session here or there, until the kids get used to the new people. Then, when you are ready to start your RCIA, and you put your resignation in to your pastor, he won’t be left to scramble for someone to take your place.

Now, if it happens that no one comes forward, you will have to resign when you start your RCIA, anyway - don’t let the lack of Protestant volunteers hinder your progress in the Catholic Church. Remember, you can’t start the Catechesis portion of your RCIA until all of your Protestant ties have been cut. So, after having done your best to recruit a replacement, and after making sure they understood that you were not intending to remain in that ministry much longer, do not feel guilty about leaving.
My father and my father-in-law are both conservative, Protestant ministers, one of them pretty much Fundamentalist and the other in a “mainline” church.
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I’ve brought the issue up once with my father-in-law, just to let him know what was going on, and it didn’t go too smoothly. I have not yet brought it up directly with my father.
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It’ll take both of them a while to get used to the idea. Give them the time they need. Remember - when you first started this journey, you were not thinking that you were going to become a Catholic. It took you a little while to get used to the idea, too. 🙂
So, have any advice? Did you have a tactful way of bringing the subject up with your Protestant family/friends? Or did you just use the old “Pass the green beans, please. Oh, and I’m Catholic now!” trick? 😛
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As I mentioned above, clue them in early, and let them know what’s going on at each stage of the journey.
 
The hardest person to tell was my wife. She comes from a heavily Baptist background. I expected much conflict - I chose to tell her after we had started a four-hour car trip. We would be forced to be together for a long time, and I was driving so I could not be seriously distracted, so hopefully we could talk it out without getting too emotional. I had no idea where the conversation would lead.

The conversation was actually brief. I told her that I thought I was being called to communion with the Catholic Church and she responded, “Oh, thank God - me too! But I was terrified to tell you!” I have never felt such relief - or such gratitude towards God.

Now it was time to tell my mother and step-father (who was a protestant minister and held a rather negative view of the Catholic Church). And to tell my wife’s Baptist family.

We sat down in the den and I said something along the same lines as I told my wife. There was very little controversy. They did not agree with our decision, but respected that we were adults in control of our own lives. I think some (especially my minister step-father) thought maybe we were not really committed to this decision and would return to our former faith soon enough. We made no effort to dissuade anyone from such beliefs - it gave them comfort, and time would prove the truth of the matter while giving them a chance to grow more comfortable with it.

My brother thought I was nuts. Here’s his website: EricFilmer.com. If you have a look, you may find it amusing.
 
I remember telling my old baptist-ish preacher about my conversion. I emphasized two things: first, Catholicism was my way to Christ, because before I converted to Catholicism, I had fallen into grave doubts about Christ; and second, people overestimate the practical difference between Catholicism and Protestantism. While in theory, they are very different, I don’t think the daily practice of a devout Catholic differs all that much most devout Protestants.

We’re excited to have you! And remember, if you ever have any questions you cannot answer, come back and post them here. I’ve never failed to find a satisfactory answer on this forum to even the most difficult-sounding objections!
 
First of all: Congratulations on coming into the Church! It’s a beautiful thing.

I was confirmed on April 3rd and I come from a family of ALL Protestants. There are a few pastors in my family, too. What helped me was to tell them how close I was becoming to the Lord. When I told a few aunts and uncles they did mention that they didn’t agree with the Church teachings, but they were reasonable enough to understand that if this decision was drawing me closer to Christ, it was a good decision.

Talk to them about your RCIA classes. Tell them you are doing more Bible study than ever (if this is true, which I assume it is.) Mostly, stress how in love you are with Jesus! Tell them that some parts of the process are scary, but that forces you to rely on Jesus as your rock and your foundation. Though we talked a lot about Church doctrine, I tried to focus more on the love of God and the following of His commandments.

God Bless You!!!
 
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