Question of a sexual nature...

[on_the_hill]

The actions you’ve described are about closeness and tenderness and are not solely or necessarily sexual. The actions I mentioned are designed to give women orgasms, independent of penetration and ejaculation, solely to satisfy physical lust. No way are they compatible with Christian marriage.

:ehh: Is there a risk, otherwise, of sliding Christian marriage toward an encounter that’s overtly functional, even clinical? It’s not like people are…mosquitoes, joining together for a brief moment simply to contribute genetic material.

More generally, sexually-themed threads on this all-ages, Catholic discussion site are 1) too common and 2) commonly too detailed. I’d not want my 11 and 15 year old daughters reading some of these posts.

 

[pensmama87]

The actions you’ve described are about closeness and tenderness and are not solely or necessarily sexual. The actions I mentioned are designed to give women orgasms, independent of penetration and ejaculation, solely to satisfy physical lust. No way are they compatible with Christian marriage.

Because a man wanting to pleasure his wife is only interested in making her sin, not about closeness and tenderness.



Remember ladies, if you like it, you’re doing it wrong!

 

[white_sheep]

The actions you’ve described are about closeness and tenderness and are not solely or necessarily sexual. The actions I mentioned are designed to give women orgasms, independent of penetration and ejaculation, solely to satisfy physical lust. No way are they compatible with Christian marriage.

Yes, it is simply about pleasure, but not at all incompatible with Christian marriage. St. JP2 encouraged such, though I don’t think he was terribly detailed about how to go about it. If the woman doesn’t enjoy it, it won’t happen often. Which really isn’t going to help with the marriage or procreation much at all.

 

[Thorns]

Because a man wanting to pleasure his wife is only interested in making her sin, not about closeness and tenderness.



Remember ladies, if you like it, you’re doing it wrong!

But yet a woman cannot “finish off” her husband in this way.

 

[on_the_hill]

But yet a woman cannot “finish off” her husband in this way.

That’s a matter of biology. :ehh:

 

[VeritasLuxMea]

But yet a woman cannot “finish off” her husband in this way.

But she can “get him started” in that way!

 

[Allegra]

:ehh: Is there a risk, otherwise, of sliding Christian marriage toward an encounter that’s overtly functional, even clinical? It’s not like people are…mosquitoes, joining together for a brief moment simply to contribute genetic material.

More generally, sexually-themed threads on this all-ages, Catholic discussion site are 1) too common and 2) commonly too detailed. I’d not want my 11 and 15 year old daughters reading some of these posts.

I wasn’t under the impression that this was an all-ages forum. There are any number of subjects discussed here that are not appropriate for an eleven-year-old. However, that doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be discussed because they are issues important to our faith. Maybe they should form a forum room that is specifically for the little ones.

 

[USMC_Convert]

Wow, I’d hate to be you or in that relationship. While your sitting there thinking about how much you hate sex next time remember this, a woman is emotional first then sexual, a man expresses his emotions through sexuality.

Check out a couple books, I can give you details on which ones I’d recommend privately, but through anonymous studies, the author found that (something like, don’t remember the exact percentage) about 60-70% of cheating husbands did it because they couldn’t express emotions! or felt emotionally closed off from their wives. Now they all admitted that they were more sexually stimulated by their mistresses, but their wives were much more sexual attractive.

In other words, the woman that expresses herself, not just sexually, but shows interest in her man, gets the final prize. Those that do not ultimately have bad marriages and or have cheating husbands, not just physically cheating, but mentally, porn, internet, and so on…

Thought of the day…

Oh and I second another writer, but wish to go further, don’t enjoy life, make sure it’s all miserable, not just for girls but for humanity. (I’m being sarcastic to those of you with no personality).

The actions you’ve described are about closeness and tenderness and are not solely or necessarily sexual. The actions I mentioned are designed to give women orgasms, independent of penetration and ejaculation, solely to satisfy physical lust. No way are they compatible with Christian marriage.

 

[USMC_Convert]

That my friend is called responsibility. Parental responsibility I believe! Watch your kids educate them your own way, and take responsibility for what happens. If your truly worried about this forum, do NOT venture elsewhere on the internet, you may become Amish.

:ehh: Is there a risk, otherwise, of sliding Christian marriage toward an encounter that’s overtly functional, even clinical? It’s not like people are…mosquitoes, joining together for a brief moment simply to contribute genetic material.

More generally, sexually-themed threads on this all-ages, Catholic discussion site are 1) too common and 2) commonly too detailed. I’d not want my 11 and 15 year old daughters reading some of these posts.

 

[on_the_hill]

That my friend is called responsibility. Parental responsibility I believe! Watch your kids educate them your own way, and take responsibility for what happens. If your truly worried about this forum, do NOT venture elsewhere on the internet, you may become Amish.

:tiphat:

 

[VeritasLuxMea]

:ehh: Is there a risk, otherwise, of sliding Christian marriage toward an encounter that’s overtly functional, even clinical? It’s not like people are…mosquitoes, joining together for a brief moment simply to contribute genetic material.

More generally, sexually-themed threads on this all-ages, Catholic discussion site are 1) too common and 2) commonly too detailed. I’d not want my 11 and 15 year old daughters reading some of these posts.

Yeah, why is it on this all ages site when it could be on one of the other boatloads of sites where Catholics speak somewhat honestly about sexuality issues? Seriously people!

 

[on_the_hill]

That my friend is called responsibility. Parental responsibility I believe! Watch your kids educate them your own way, and take responsibility for what happens. If your truly worried about this forum, do NOT venture elsewhere on the internet, you may become Amish.

Responsibility on the part of the people posting? Or my responsibility as a parent?

Are you saying I ought not allow my kids to read a Catholic website because some of the posters give each other sex advice?

As for venturing elsewhere, I know all too well what’s out there. Which is why I presume that a Catholic website would be safe.

As for becoming Amish–that’s a bigoted remark but clearly not your fault, Few people know or understand the Plain, so I’ll give you a pass. How’d you feel if a non-Catholic made a joke about how most Catholic seminarians are gay?

 

[on_the_hill]

Yeah, why is it on this all ages site when it could be on one of the other boatloads of sites where Catholics speak somewhat honestly about sexuality issues? Seriously people!

I don’t know if you’re being serious or sarcastic. I’m not being sarcastic. I think the mods let a lot of junk go on these boards so long as the posters at least pretend to be Catholic.

Defend homosexuality, and you get flamed. Talk about the best way for a man to delay orgasm while pleasuring his wife at the same time, talk about the finer points of oral sex, whether or not anal is acceptable, etc. so long as you’re being “chaste” and following NFP, you get a pass.

 

[VeritasLuxMea]

I don’t know if you’re being serious or sarcastic. I’m not being sarcastic. I think the mods let a lot of junk go on these boards so long as the posters at least pretend to be Catholic.

Defend homosexuality, and you get flamed. Talk about the best way for a man to delay orgasm while pleasuring his wife at the same time, talk about the finer points of oral sex, whether or not anal is acceptable, etc. so long as you’re being “chaste” and following NFP, you get a pass.

Why would chastity not be a thing on a Catholic forum?

 

[Rau]

I know the Church says it’s OK for a husband to stimulate his wife with his hands or mouth, but I have never understood why that would be so. Surely this is not a procreative act, and not needed for procreation? It is just something that some men do to satisfy women’s sexual desires.

The position that it is “OK” is on the understanding that it is occurring within the context of procreative sexual act. That act need not be deemed concluded at the moment of ejaculation. Bringing the wife to orgasm beyond that point is considered loving.

Orgasms contribute to the unitive purposes of sexual relations. Strengthening bonds of closeness and commitment to each other, quietening concupiscence, and so on.

Does that influence your thinking on the matter?

 

[Rau]

…I think the mods let a lot of junk go on these boards so long as the posters at least pretend to be Catholic.

Defend homosexuality, and you get flamed. Talk about the best way for a man to delay orgasm while pleasuring his wife at the same time, talk about the finer points of oral sex, whether or not anal is acceptable, etc. so long as you’re being “chaste” and following NFP, you get a pass.

Who flames you - the mods? In my experience, you can put a very wide range of genuinely, courteously held positions here (including pro gay marriage and gay sex) without bringing sanction. But if you get irrational, or personally abusive, or abusive of the Church, your virtual life may be terminated.

 

[Cat]

I don’t know if you’re being serious or sarcastic. I’m not being sarcastic. I think the mods let a lot of junk go on these boards so long as the posters at least pretend to be Catholic.

Defend homosexuality, and you get flamed. Talk about the best way for a man to delay orgasm while pleasuring his wife at the same time, talk about the finer points of oral sex, whether or not anal is acceptable, etc. so long as you’re being “chaste” and following NFP, you get a pass.

I don’t understand your post. Are you saying that these topics are unsuitable?

Premature ejaculation is one of the most common issues that men bring to their doctors and therapists. There are methods that help men, especially young men, learn to delay their orgasm.

I see nothing un-Christian or inappropriate about this topic, or any of the others you mentioned. Almost every off-the-shelf women’s magazine (Woman’s Day, Good Housekeeping, etc.) features articles about these topics, and has done so for decades.

These are questions that many couples have. Christian couples in particular want answers (Catholic answers) and don’t feel comfortable getting those answers from secular magazine articles.

I don’t think young children should be on CAF, and sex is the least of the reasons. I think a lot of the topics on this site could be confusing and disturbing to children. E.g., there is currently a topic on chewing the Host or allowing it to dissolve. How does a child deal with this topic?! Their parish priest tells them one thing and here on this site, they read a thread where certain posters imply that their priest might be wrong–it’s hard enough for adults to deal with that!

I think it should be up to parents to share certain threads with their children if they think that their children would benefit from it. But I don’t think children should be allowed to toodle around this site. I hope other parents agree with me.

 

[Burt_Macklin]

OP, disable the spam filter on your email account. I get loads of advice on how to deal with your type of sensitive problem every day.

 

[USMC_Convert]

Hmmm yep, your the one complaining about what’s on the website, your the one not wanting your daughters to read it, therefore it’s your responsibility. Certainly isn’t mine… Or perhaps you believe that we (me and the rest of the people posting) should censor our questions, trials, and tribulations for the chance that your daughters get on this forum??? Besides, I didn’t think we were giving each other sex advise, it seemed to me that we were attempting to help someone that had a legitimate question about God and sex.

So now because I said that Amish don’t have internet I’m a bigot, oh my friend, you must be a liberal!!!

PSSSTTTTT… BTW, READ THE HANDLE, USMC_Convert. Obviously I wasn’t always Catholic, and I’ve heard my fair share (and said my fair share) of priest jokes. Maybe I really am a bigot, oh my, I’ve said Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist, Catholic, Protestant, White, Black, Indian (dot and dance), Asian, Arab, and everything else jokes too. Oh my, maybe I’m prejudice, racist, and a general barbarian as well. Mercy my!!!

I guess I’m just really surprised that Catholics (Cradle Catholics) have never heard or said these things… I’m sorry for exposing you to that side of the world.

Responsibility on the part of the people posting? Or my responsibility as a parent?

Are you saying I ought not allow my kids to read a Catholic website because some of the posters give each other sex advice?

As for venturing elsewhere, I know all too well what’s out there. Which is why I presume that a Catholic website would be safe.

As for becoming Amish–that’s a bigoted remark but clearly not your fault, Few people know or understand the Plain, so I’ll give you a pass. How’d you feel if a non-Catholic made a joke about how most Catholic seminarians are gay?

 

[white_sheep]

How many kids actually spend their time reading the family issues section of a Catholic message board? I’d think they have bigger problems if they do.