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SeekerJen
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anamchara
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anamchara;2441110:
Oh ok,I assumed that “stud” was an abreviation of “student”, as “grad” is an abreviation of “graduate”. Perhaps I am just naive.
I assumed stud meant a male animal employed for breeding or as it’s more commonly known, a handsome strong man ready for the taking. When I see that I always think of these guys with all these women around. Oooo he is such a “stud” lol. Sorry it’s just where my mind goes but I think that has a lot to do with how we use the word now, tv, movies. Unless you live on a farm it probably means something else
If the OP meant for it to mean stud as in student then I apologize but still think it odd that he only directed to women.
Now that I have lead this thread off track
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gradstud35
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Okay, I am a 35 year old FEMALE graduate student. Sorry for the confusion. I hate chosing sign on names and I can never think of good ones clearly.
Let me clarify my dilmena. My dilmena in my embarrasment is not whether I know the priest or not, or whether it is a hidden or open confession, it is more a female/male thing and the nature of the sin.
Let me clarify my dilmena. My dilmena in my embarrasment is not whether I know the priest or not, or whether it is a hidden or open confession, it is more a female/male thing and the nature of the sin.
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proudnifi
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I find it awkward, but doubt it would be less so with a woman. I am a big fan of the screen and attempts at delicate wording.
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mercygate
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You say these are “old” sins. Then, for pete’s sake, GO TO CONFESSION ASAP, and just SAY it! You’re 35; although you are a woman, I encourage you to “be a man!” Get this off your chest and get right with God.
I had intercourse with my boyfriend.
I masturbated.
I looked at pornography.
I fondled my baby brother.
Whatever it was.
Just SAY it. as an earlier poster said: Consider the alternative.
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dessert
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I confessed to a priest one time about some of my dark side and he got to know my inner self and being his age I think he understood more than I knew even being a man he understood women. I was falling into too much of friendship with some at church and he (my priest) came over and took my hand and held my arm and I knew my priest knew my inner soul at that moment and was not hiding anything from the spirit so now I listen to the voice inside me that says stop you are going to far and look at the warning signs. I don’t know that priest anymore but he gave me a spirit of discernment so unless you really get really close and open up your soul to someone so they really can help you will be alone (but of course with God) in this spiritual warfare and it can happen in the church. So in conclusion confess all because God allready knows anyways and now I confess all my thoughts to my priest and God will use him as servant for me or me for another. We are to serve one another, not just cake and icecream.
Dessert
Dessert
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dessert
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I did feel uncomfortable at first my first in 40 years but I had to get over it. That is a good thing because it means you feel convicted and are serious repentant. I pray you can go through with this.
Dessert
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rayne89
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When I first returned to the church I did. It took me a while to get over feeling like I was going to be sick to my stomach from nerves. (I have a lot of pride). I was not nervous because of the man/woman thing. I pretty sure the priests are quite used to it.
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scarlet405
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I confessed to a priest one time about some of my dark side and he got to know my inner self and being his age I think he understood more than I knew even being a man he understood women. I was falling into too much of friendship with some at church and he (my priest) came over and took my hand and held my arm and I knew my priest knew my inner soul at that moment and was not hiding anything from the spirit so now I listen to the voice inside me that says stop you are going to far and look at the warning signs. I don’t know that priest anymore but he gave me a spirit of discernment so unless you really get really close and open up your soul to someone so they really can help you will be alone (but of course with God) in this spiritual warfare and it can happen in the church. So in conclusion confess all because God allready knows anyways and now I confess all my thoughts to my priest and God will use him as servant for me or me for another. We are to serve one another, not just cake and icecream.
Dessert
Hello again, I have to agree with mercygate and crenfroe. These are things that happened along time ago, and when you consider the alternative, I think you can go behind the screen, say your confession quickly and just do it. You are a strong mature woman, and men are SIMPLE creatures, whether they are men of God or not. I guarantee your priest will have heard worse, and will not think anything bad of you. I understand you issue is with speaking to a man, I have issues with that as well, but when it comes to my soul, well God is first and if there is a man (priest) in the middle, well I just deal. I am not saying this is easy, but the longer you put it off the harder it becomes. I will be praying for you.Again good luck and Peace be with YOU!.
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puzzleannie
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in confession I am confessing to Christ, who is a male, and who forgave public sinners who had no qualm coming to him, so why should I place my sensibilities above theirs?
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anamchara
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I’m sorry
I made a butt out of myself I guess.I would recommend just doing it and tell the pries up front that you are very nervous and tell him why. They are very used to this type of thing. I’m sure he will make you feel at ease.
I felt as you did and I was 43. I just went in and told him how I felt before we began and he just took my hands in his and spoke softly and assured me. We were sitting fairly close so I didn’t have to talk to loud which also helped. I think his sweet little Irish accent helped. It was very soothing. Maybe it was the holy spirit 
I had to confess later that I had fallen in love with him but that’s another story I’m joking!! lol!You will be amazed how much better you feel when your done. You have my prayers of courage.
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scarlet405
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I have to agree with anamachara. That is some solid advice. I think all females get nervous to some degree in the area you are talking about. Actually the time I had to tell something of this nature I did not want to, I was shaking and throwing up, then I just said have to do this, and went and did it. The priest was wonderful, he knew I was nervous and he just really helped me through it. I think they really must have some kind of “Confession Training”
Good Luck and God Bless You,
scarlet405 :tiphat:
I think all females get nervous to some degree in the area you are talking about. Actually the time I had to tell something of this nature I did not want to, I was shaking and throwing up, then I just said have to do this, and went and did it. The priest was wonderful, he knew I was nervous and he just really helped me through it. I think they really must have some kind of “Confession Training” Good Luck and God Bless You,
scarlet405 :tiphat:
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MSJoan
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I don’t feel comfortable confessing sins, period. But, if it were easy to do, I would probably be less inclined to ‘amend my life.’
If you aren’t comfortable with your priest, go somewhere else. If having the screen helps you to confess, by all means use the screen. If you are comfortable face to face, go for it. It may help to think of how Jesus responded to the woman who annointed His feet and dried them with her hair; the priest will greet you the same way, possibly more so if he knows you.
Bottom line is you will not only have the sin, but the avoidance of confessing it eating at you until you ‘go to the box’. The evil one doesn’t mind waiting in the hopes that you won’t go at all.
If you aren’t comfortable with your priest, go somewhere else. If having the screen helps you to confess, by all means use the screen. If you are comfortable face to face, go for it. It may help to think of how Jesus responded to the woman who annointed His feet and dried them with her hair; the priest will greet you the same way, possibly more so if he knows you.
Bottom line is you will not only have the sin, but the avoidance of confessing it eating at you until you ‘go to the box’. The evil one doesn’t mind waiting in the hopes that you won’t go at all.
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scarlet405
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Hello MSJoan, I think what you have to say is very sound. I agree with you. I did say something like that earlier in the conversation, as for me and my priest, not a problem. He is wonderful and very understanding, helpful. No one likes confession, but you have to look at the alternative. The alternative will quickly get you over any anxieties you might feel. May the Peace of God be with You. :yup: scarlet405
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Sr_Sally
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You do not have to be detailed and explict in your confessions. You simply need to state the sin (adultery / fornication) and the number of times (or approximete number) --for example 10 times in the past week/month/year. If the priest needs more information to judge the seriousness, he will ask.
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scarlet405
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Hello SR Sally, and I would like to say GREAT POINT. 
Don’t know why I did not think about that. It is what I was taught, obviously you were also. The important thing is to confess. Thank you for adding your point, I hope it is helpful to others as it is helpful for me, in that I know a little better way to express how to confess to a friend. I hope this made sense to you. God Bless You,
scarlet405
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Sr_Sally
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Your welcome!
God Bless You,
scarlet405
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