iluvmybabies… none of us think you are a simpleton or anything like that. You have been mis-educated, and that is not your fault.
I do feel like it sometimes especially about our religion…I speak with our priest he tells me one thing if that sort of conversation comes up between my family it’s so frustrating because I am like HELLO MY PRIEST TOLD ME THAT!! And they turn around and tell me well obviously he doesn’t know what he’s sayin!! it’s like WHAT???
You are an adult, and I think you need to just stop listening to a lot of what your parents say to you. What you describe in your last post is a pair of abusers using their religion as a club to control and belittle their child. Yes, I said ABUSERS. The only healthy response is to stop giving them any control or influence over your life and decisions.
Well if you would read the other thread about “when should parents intercede” or something like that, many parent’s believe it’s a correct way to act, try to tell their kids what to do no matter what!!!

Well that’s one of the reasons I have moved far away!!! I am tired of everything I do is wrong even in raising my kids!!!
You don’t have to cut them out of your life if you don’t wish to (though I would seriously consider it if I were you), but what you can do and need to do is to stop caring about their opinions. When they go off, just remind yourself that you are an adult making your own decisions, and that their opinion doesn’t ultimately matter. Whenever they speak abusively to you, say calmly, “When you can discuss this respectfully and calmly, then we can continue this conversation.” Then walk out of the room or hang up the phone. Do that **every time **they say something abusive. Just don’t take delivery of their abuse anymore!
Yes actually after almost 30 years I have finally learned not to contradict, I will continue following what I believe and if I feel I need to ask someone I will pray, I will ask our dear friends here on the forum or my priest…

Oh yeah me walk out of a room or hang up the phone ya right!! I would never hear the end of it…I just sit there shaking my head as if I understand what they are saying and pretending I agree with them, I no longer fight nor fuzz about anything nor try to prove them wrong, I will never win!!! Nor be correct…
Do your parents treat your children the way they treated you? Because you have to protect your babies and even keep them from contact if the abusiveness is extending to your kids.
That’s actually a good question…They tried to spoil them rotten!!! LIKE seriously!! I couldn’t control my children at all! It was horrible thus I moved far away!!! No they just made my daughter ask one day why my mother treats me bad or hates me!! I was like uhm? Well…it’s not hate she is just special!!! I didn’t know what else to really say you know…In the end I let my daughter know that some people don’t know how to really control themselves nor frustrations and take it out the wrong way and it looks wrong but that’s how they are, we just have to be calm and accept them and pray for them!! Well my mother has always had favs I wasn’t one of her fav kids…Same thing with grandkids mine are not her favs which causes issues with my daughter and niece…my daughter once asked me why my mother hated her, and I was like it’s not hate sweety she is just trying to protect the youngest girl in the family it’s a natural feeling that has been passed on from our ancestor’s its our primate control!!!

So my daughter was not happy but I told her her grandmother loves her more than life itself she just has a different way of showing it!!!
:console: