Questions About Abortion

[johannahw]

Sometimes, I have serious questions about whether or not abortion could be okay in some situations. Let me say first that I am a Catholic convert though not very strong in my faith at times. I struggle with a serious mental illness though I’m on medication now that seems to be working. At least for all this week I’ve felt pretty much back to normal. Please don’t jump all over me because sometimes I have doubts on this issue. They are only doubts stemming from my own personal experience and I fight to understand God’s plan for my life.
My mother was raped when she was 18. I was the result. My mother and I never were able to be close. I love her with all my heart and am really sad that she resents my existence but I try to understand her feelings. She used to tell me while I was growing up that if abortions had been legal she’d have gotten one. I still don’t have a great relationship with my mother and have forgiven her. I still remain in contact with her but she never makes the effort to reach out to me. Also while very young (3 years old) I went through a very traumatic time of sexual abuse by my step father. This whole thing opened up a whole new avenue of sin for me at such a young age. I want to tell you all that all this stuff happened in the 1950s. We are led to believe those days were purer than our own. I don’t think so. I think a lot was swept under the rug.
Anyway, why isn’t abortion in the case of rape allowed? I don’t know. I kind of think pregnancy resulting from a rape is rare and maybe all mothers who bear children this way don’t actually hate or resent their offspring. I just wonder about this sometimes. I’ve led a very sorrowful life at times. BTW, my mother IS close to my other siblings.
Thanks for hearing me out.
Johannah

 

[vern_humphrey]

Sometimes, I have serious questions about whether or not abortion could be okay in some situations. Let me say first that I am a Catholic convert though not very strong in my faith at times. I struggle with a serious mental illness though I’m on medication now that seems to be working. At least for all this week I’ve felt pretty much back to normal. Please don’t jump all over me because sometimes I have doubts on this issue. They are only doubts stemming from my own personal experience and I fight to understand God’s plan for my life.
My mother was raped when she was 18. I was the result. My mother and I never were able to be close. I love her with all my heart and am really sad that she resents my existence but I try to understand her feelings. She used to tell me while I was growing up that if abortions had been legal she’d have gotten one. I still don’t have a great relationship with my mother and have forgiven her. I still remain in contact with her but she never makes the effort to reach out to me. Also while very young (3 years old) I went through a very traumatic time of sexual abuse by my step father. This whole thing opened up a whole new avenue of sin for me at such a young age. I want to tell you all that all this stuff happened in the 1950s. We are led to believe those days were purer than our own. I don’t think so. I think a lot was swept under the rug.
Anyway, why isn’t abortion in the case of rape allowed? I don’t know. I kind of think pregnancy resulting from a rape is rare and maybe all mothers who bear children this way don’t actually hate or resent their offspring. I just wonder about this sometimes. I’ve led a very sorrowful life at times. BTW, my mother IS close to my other siblings.
Thanks for hearing me out.
Johannah

I feel for you – all of us do – and you will be in my prayers. But
do you honestly think your mother should have put you to death?

Would you not agree that the child of a rape is just as much a victim as the mother? That would make rape the only crime that carries a death sentence for the victim!

 

[TheGoodLife]

I’m so sorry you’re in a low place emotionally right now. My mother also used to tell me she wished she had aborted me and I also went through molestation as a child. I used to pray to God so many nights to let me die in my sleep. I didn’t know why God would want me to live when no one seemed to. I wished many nights that my mother had aborted me, as if that would’ve solved all my troubles.

Today my feelings are so different. God granted me a husband (whom I prayed for) who showed me the good side of life. I now have a daughter who I am raising with the help of God’s love. She is simply amazing and so lively and happy. She has the childhood I never got to have. Through her, I am being shown by God how wonderful life can be and how I am instrumental in my daughter’s happiness.

I am still wondering what God has in store for me. I see life as a series of wrapped gifts, each waiting to be revealed at the right time. Some gifts we like, and some we don’t like or think we don’t have a use for it, but they all have meaning in the long run.

Just because you were born of less than desirable circumstances doesn’t mean your life is any less valuable than that of anyone else. Who knows? Maybe God’s plan is for you to help other children in similar circumstances, and He wanted you to completely understand where they’re coming from.

I hope you are able to find peace. You deserve it.

 

[johannahw]

I guess you really are right. It is kind of dumb to make the victim suffer but that seems to be just what my mother did and continues to do. Every time I hear from my sister and she tells me Mom called her my heart just aches. My mom NEVER calls me. She won’t even answer my emails. I just keep on writing her and calling her from time to time.
Sometimes I just think it would have been better had I never been born. Somewhere in the Bible God says Though a mother may forget her child, I will not forget you. I have clung to that verse for years.
Thanks for responding.
Johanah

 

[1ke]

She used to tell me while I was growing up that if abortions had been legal she’d have gotten one.

This is cruel. Your mother has absolutely no right to tell you such horrible things.

Anyway, why isn’t abortion in the case of rape allowed?

Abortion is murder. Every child is a person and has God-given dignity. You have God-given dignity-- you are made in God’s image and likeness. God loves you.

The fact that your father committed an act of aggression towards your mother in no way changes that **you **are an innocent person and have an inherent dignity and right to life.

I’ve led a very sorrowful life at times. BTW, my mother IS close to my other siblings.

Johannah,

Your mother has chosen to behave this way towards you. If she was not strong enough to love an innocent baby then she could have made a choice to give you to a loving set of parents via adoption. Instead she chose to lash out at you for what your father did. That is wrong, and inexcusable. She may have been a victim of rape, but it gave her no right to vicitimize you.

That is all on her. YOU have done nothing. YOU are an innocent victim.

Killing a baby in the womb does nothing to undo the rape. Killing the baby perpetrates another crime.

It is a shame your mother did not choose a different path. I hope you will get counseling to help you see that you are a child of God. You have an equal dignity before God and an equal right to a full life.

 

[1ke]

Sometimes I just think it would have been better had I never been born.

Of course it would not have been better. You are unique and irreplaceable.

There is so much you can do in this world. Live your life looking forward, not backwards.

 

[Dorothy]

<<God says Though a mother may forget her child, I will not forget you. I have clung to that verse for years.>>

Keep clinging to that verse! The Lord loves you with an infinite love.

Your mother is in much need of prayers for rejecting you. Cling to Jesus and our Blessed Mother!

 

[dylanschrader]

I guess you really are right. It is kind of dumb to make the victim suffer but that seems to be just what my mother did and continues to do. Every time I hear from my sister and she tells me Mom called her my heart just aches. My mom NEVER calls me. She won’t even answer my emails. I just keep on writing her and calling her from time to time.
Sometimes I just think it would have been better had I never been born. Somewhere in the Bible God says Though a mother may forget her child, I will not forget you. I have clung to that verse for years.
Thanks for responding.
Johanah

It sounds like you have had a lot of suffering in your life.

Remember that even though your mother was raped (a terrible evil), God is so good that he used that evil to bring about someone very good–you. Your creation wasn’t accidental or random. God didn’t have to create you–or any of us–but he freely chose to do so out of love.

When Jesus was dying on the cross, he told St. John to take the Blessed Virgin Mary as his mother. In doing so, Jesus gave Mary as a mother to the Church, to everyone who needs one. You can look to her, too.

God bless.

 

[KCT]

It is kind of dumb to make the victim suffer but that seems to be just what my mother did and continues to do.

And its wrong.

Your mom will have to answer to God for the way she treats you. Her opinion of you does not influence God’s opinion of you!

—KCT

 

[valdeere]

Sometimes, I have serious questions about whether or not abortion could be okay in some situations. Let me say first that I am a Catholic convert though not very strong in my faith at times. I struggle with a serious mental illness though I’m on medication now that seems to be working. At least for all this week I’ve felt pretty much back to normal. Please don’t jump all over me because sometimes I have doubts on this issue. They are only doubts stemming from my own personal experience and I fight to understand God’s plan for my life.
My mother was raped when she was 18. I was the result. My mother and I never were able to be close. I love her with all my heart and am really sad that she resents my existence but I try to understand her feelings. She used to tell me while I was growing up that if abortions had been legal she’d have gotten one. I still don’t have a great relationship with my mother and have forgiven her. I still remain in contact with her but she never makes the effort to reach out to me. Also while very young (3 years old) I went through a very traumatic time of sexual abuse by my step father. This whole thing opened up a whole new avenue of sin for me at such a young age. I want to tell you all that all this stuff happened in the 1950s. We are led to believe those days were purer than our own. I don’t think so. I think a lot was swept under the rug.
Anyway, why isn’t abortion in the case of rape allowed? I don’t know. I kind of think pregnancy resulting from a rape is rare and maybe all mothers who bear children this way don’t actually hate or resent their offspring. I just wonder about this sometimes. I’ve led a very sorrowful life at times. BTW, my mother IS close to my other siblings.
Thanks for hearing me out.
Johannah

Hey Johannah! I think everyone has posted really great comments, I will be praying that they help and comfort you.

I am so sorry that your mother has held you at a distance and that it has affected you, but I have to say that this is your mother’s issue. I know that it has hurt you your whole life, but it is something that she needs to come to terms with, I wish she would have done it years ago for your sake.

I am not in your situation, but I do have to say that you are so worthy of life, and this is why it’s not okay to abort a pregnancy no matter how it came to be. If every pregnant person who has an abortion was a little less selfish and offered her baby for adoption, so many couples in our country would not have to adopt from other countries. There is a place for every baby that is aborted and each deserves a chance at life. To approve of ending a life because of circumstance is to say that none of our lives are sacred. We’re either all worthy of life, or none of us are worthy.

God has a purpose for you, that is why you are here, and our hardships (which manifest themselves differently in all of us) make us who we are! God wanted you and each and every one of us, and He also wants each life that is ended by abortion, no matter what the circumstance.

I’ll be thinking of you, girlie!

 

[johannahw]

Thanks Valerie and all the rest of you too.
My life has been difficult and still has its sad moments where my family is concerned. I’ve never had much self-esteem and that doesn’t help. I’m going to try to make this whole problem a matter of prayer and meditation. Maybe one day through God’s grace I’ll be able to see my worth in his eyes and I’ll truly understand that I am a precious human being who has dignity. Thank you all again for your helpful responses.
Johannah

 

[Renton405]

This is cruel. Your mother has absolutely no right to tell you such horrible things.

Abortion is murder. Every child is a person and has God-given dignity. You have God-given dignity-- you are made in God’s image and likeness. God loves you.

The fact that your father committed an act of aggression towards your mother in no way changes that **you **are an innocent person and have an inherent dignity and right to life.

Johannah,

Your mother has chosen to behave this way towards you. If she was not strong enough to love an innocent baby then she could have made a choice to give you to a loving set of parents via adoption. Instead she chose to lash out at you for what your father did. That is wrong, and inexcusable. She may have been a victim of rape, but it gave her no right to vicitimize you.

That is all on her. YOU have done nothing. YOU are an innocent victim.

Killing a baby in the womb does nothing to undo the rape. Killing the baby perpetrates another crime.

It is a shame your mother did not choose a different path. I hope you will get counseling to help you see that you are a child of God. You have an equal dignity before God and an equal right to a full life.

I agree. what kind of mother would say that to her child “If Abortion was legal then I would have aborted you”… that is an absolute horrible thing to say to a child… Honestly, she should be ashamed of herself… She is projecting her anger from her rapist to you…

This is NOT your fault. Do not let her make you feel guilty. The fact that there was sexual abuse from the step-father shows that she did nothing to protect you from this the way a mother should…And as a result you have become a victim because of another persons problems. Just as the above poster said, it is HER , not you…

Be glad to be alive and show confidence in yourself… You are not a mistake. You are here for a reason… Never forget that,

 

[emily47017]

suicidal thoughts are strange things, and i wonder if this is another manifestation of your recent struggles? thoughts of not being born are basically back-door thoughts of death – maybe?

i’m glad you can forgive your mother. that’s a heck of a thing to have to forgive.

i agree with all the previous posters: she was wrong to tell you she would have aborted you, and you don’t need to accept that thought. you don’t need to wonder for even a second if it would have better not to be born. you have a right to be here; you have a right to breathe this air and taste this life. god wouldn’t have it any other way.

 

[Maxply]

Well, WE’RE glad you’re here! God bless.

 

[CCM08]

I would certainly understand a woman giving up a child in that situation, in fact in the situation you describe I tend to think you’d have been better off if your mother had given you up. The issue here is simply it is not okay to kill a child for a parent’s crime.