Questions about homosexuality

[Cruciferi]

You listed pleasure twice. Other than that looks good

 

[Jamie5]

You listed pleasure twice. Other than that looks good

But it’s not meant to be good I listed that to show how humanity does in fact really enjoy all of those things you think ought not to be done. And that can lead to serious guilt for those who are taught the opposite if that makes sense.

 

[Cruciferi]

Ummm I think I already said it’s gonna be pleasurable. That’s not evil. Nor is the act. The misuse of the gift of sex is a sin. It has to remain within the confines of heterosexual marriage. I would advise reading Theology of the Body. Of course it’s gonna fly in the face of secular “morality”.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

I can see where some of the sad sacks on this forum would make you think “not for pleasure”, but as long as you’re open to conception then it’s perfectly fine to have a pleasurable sexual relationship with your spouse in a marriage and a lot of us Catholics do.

Having said that, I will say it can be difficult for young people who are Catholic to deal with sexuality (including heterosexuality) because there seems to be an emphasis on sexual “sins” over all other kinds. I’ve heard it said that the worst sin is that of pride, but the amount of stuff I hear or read about the sin of pride is miniscule compared to the amount of discussion, debate, and finger pointing about the sins of the flesh.

 

[theCardinalbird]

Ummm I think I already said it’s gonna be pleasurable. That’s not evil. Nor is the act. The misuse of the gift of sex is a sin.

Indeed and this sin is portrayed in our secular society as something “good” and “can’t live without” making it harder for people to stay chaste and honor what sex is made for (in marriage).

Don’t you agree?

 

[Prodigal_Son]

There’s only guilt when you know you did something wrong

That is profoundly false. When I was 7 and I got naked with a girl I knew, just to look at each other, we didn’t “do something wrong.” We were being little curious kids. It was my brother screaming at us that made me feel guilt, not what I had done. Guilt CAN occur when you’ve done something you know to be wrong, but it can also be imposed by someone outside you, without you having any choice in the matter.

Catholics do often impose on one another unnecessary guilt. That’s important to realize, so that we can pursue REAL holiness, not counterfeit holiness. Counterfeit holiness involves living up to the expectations of others, and their perception of what we ought to be like. Real holiness is a life transformed by the inner working of the Holy Spirit.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

Catholics do often impose on one another unnecessary guilt. That’s important to realize, so that we can pursue REAL holiness, not counterfeit holiness.

Agree 1000%. One of the things I don’t like about Catholic culture is the tendency to impose guilt on others. Growing up, I was guilted by my mother and by the nuns at school, and as an adult you get it from other Catholics. Even if you honestly don’t feel like something you did was wrong or “all that bad” given the circumstances, you still end up feeling terrible because you failed expectations and are therefore a bad person in someone else’s eyes. I decided a long time ago that guilt is not a productive emotion because so many people use it as a power play and it impacts most heavily on people who are genuinely making the effort to do good and tend to be very hard on themselves and self-blame a lot anyway, whereas the person who doesn’t care so much about either others or his own behavior and probably has done actual hurtful things won’t give a darn.

Externally imposed guilt is harmful to self-esteem. A person who is made to feel like garbage is not going to be in good shape for using his conscience, setting boundaries, or serving the Lord. The guilt trips I received as a young person had the effect of driving me away from the Church and I got a lot more mentally healthy when I decided as a twenty or thirty something to just throw the idea of guilt in the trash, focus on doing the best I could, and listen to my own conscience, not someone else trying to tell me how I should act.

 

[joeybaggz]

Prodigal_Son:

Catholics do often impose on one another unnecessary guilt. That’s important to realize, so that we can pursue REAL holiness, not counterfeit holiness.

The guilt trips I received as a young person had the effect of driving me away from the Church and I got a lot more mentally healthy when I decided as a twenty or thirty something to just throw the idea of guilt in the trash, focus on doing the best I could, and listen to my own conscience, not someone else trying to tell me how I should act.

And it is important to realize and recognize that an awful lot of those who impose their own standards of conduct and guilt have a truncated and immature attitude toward sex and its expression. Much of what I read on here when subjects like this arise, is from people with a very slanted and antagonistic view toward human sexuality. The very use of the term “animal instincts” points to that orientation.

 

[joeybaggz]

Point of clarification. My above post was in response to the idea TB offered as to the general idea of making up one’s own mind and conscience regarding sexual expression. Rereading the title of the thread, I did not intend it as supporting homosexual behavior. And that last statement is not meant to condemn those with a SSA for trying to form their own consciences.

 

[Senneville]

No, you did not. The Catholic Church does not say sex cannot be pleasurable. God created sex to be pleasurable. Also, fantasies that involve your spouse are not sinful.