Questions on sexuality in an unequally yoked marriage

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Zaccheus said:
It ounds to me like you have valid medical reasons for a tubal ligation.
You woulnd’t be doing that just to avoid having more children. You’d be doing it to avoid life-threatening medical problems.
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No. It doesn’t at all seem that she has a serious medical condition for which the treatment is tubal ligation, with sterilization being an unintended consequence. In this context the direct and intended purpose of a ligation would be to frustrate the procreative aspect of the marital act, which is definitively forbidden by Catholic teaching.
 
honestly, i think the only other option is just to abstain altogether. what exactly does your husband want anyways? does he want you to take birth control? because it’s not fool proof, and also fairly common knowledge that it can lead to other health issues for the women.

you certainly have valid reasons to avoid another pregnancy, i don’t know what method of nfp you are using, but i believe there are several different ones, perhaps you could look up some others and see if they might work better for you?
 
Exactly. There are other forms of intimacy that you could try bringing in to your marriage if they aren’t there, and you would need to make sure that your husband knows that you aren’t abstaining because of something wrong with him, but he should be inclined to support you and not hurt you if you decide for full abstinence.
 
Hubby’s not Catholic and doesn’t want more kids?

Obvious solution is obvious.
 
Weepingmaytarry said:
What is an ethicist?
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I second the notion this is NOT a dumb question. Ethicists may work in a generalized field or in a particularly narrow field. For example some catholic dioceseS employ just such a person. Most often this is in the person of a medical ethicist; one of which I am personally aquatinted.

You can obviously start on the ground with a parish or other local minister. If you don’t find satisfaction you have recourse to the diocesan chancery and even your own conscience.

Your concern is not terribly uncommon. There are more answers available than not having sex with a spouse or ‘living in sin.’
 
Have you looked into Marquette NFP? It uses ovulation strips to more accurately determine ovulation while breastfeeding. If you have a FSA or HSA you can use that to buy the strips.
 
Thank you for this. It is really hard. It’s not as simple as “Do what the Church says, your husband should support you in that.” All kinds of things should happen that don’t and then you still have to figure out what to do. You have to figure out how to live obediently in a marriage where the person you’re bound to doesn’t want you to be obedient. Holy crap. It’s so hard.
 
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