Quick question on Marriage in the Church

[OSN]

From what I can gather, for Catholics;

Is it correct or not, that Catholics are only supposed to marry Catholics; with the openness to have children ? If that is correct, what is the church teaching on those catholic’s who want to marry but not have children, and a link to a source if one knows of any would be appreciated. Also, for those who are Catholic that want to marry outside of the faith, is it correct or not , that there needs to be some sort of marriage in good faith, approved by ones local bishop, and that if the couple would have children , the parents need to agree / be willing to raise those children Catholic ?

Again, I would appreciate any links to sources for replies to these questions.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

Source: Catechism section on Marriage
http://www.vatican.va/archive/ccc_css/archive/catechism/p2s2c3a7.htm
Also Canon law on Marriage, starts here
http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG1104/_P3V.HTM

Is it correct or not, that Catholics are only supposed to marry Catholics

Encouraged, but not required

with the openness to have children ?

Required

what is the church teaching on those catholic’s who want to marry but not have children,

Don’t get married then

Also, for those who are Catholic that want to marry outside of the faith, is it correct or not , that there needs to be some sort of marriage in good faith,

The Church obviously doesn’t approve of any sort of marriage made in “bad faith”, whatever that is - shotgun wedding maybe?

approved by ones local bishop

Yes

and that if the couple would have children , the parents need to agree / be willing to raise those children Catholic ?

The Catholic parent has to make that promise.
The Non-Catholic parent has to be aware that the Catholic parent is making the promise and be okay with that.

 

[OSN]

what is the church teaching on those catholic’s who want to marry but not have children,

Are you saying that as your personal opinion , or as a theological answer that the Catholic Church promotes ? I would be interested in a factual response that is tangible, that I can physically look at via some kind of church document, something by a cannon lawyer, the R.C. Catechism what ever suits.

I find it a bit odd that Catholics who do not want children are prevented from marrying. I also thought that Natural Family Planning was some sort of way for Catholic couples to engage in married relations, but not become pregnant, or is that just an unexpected side effect and the rationalization is that it is intended to help couples conceive when they are ready ? ( an now I suppose I spun this into a N.F.P topic. ) { which this is an assumption I understand }

An then an opinion response would be, how is any of this that the Church has created not oppressive to humanity , the only rationalization I can conclude is that it is to protect a stance that the Church holds belief in, yet ignores the fact that, not all Catholics agree with, or at least treads with caution to not ask questions to married couples that one may not really want the answer to. Though I suppose the reality is the Church realizes the oppression, created said rules to protect its stance, and treads in a manner as to try and sway opinion of the faithful to come into agreement with their stance.

Then another opinion comment which is fine for an opinion based response is that the Church has lost credibility with any kind of moral judgement on a lot of issues. An lost trust with the faithful and society. So how does the Church really expect anyone to follow such religious laws that they create ?

More and more I find more reasons to be highly critical in regards to the religious laws that the Church creates, if the Church only stuck to the sacraments and left everything else out. Life for me would at least in a spiritual sense be a lot easier. Though I do understand society as a whole at least in part, needs to be lead by the nose. An those who seek power are all the more ready to oblige.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

Did you read the sources I posted?

The answer is quite clear from the sources that this is not my personal opinion.

Are you just looking for somebody to give you the answers you want to hear, instead of the actual Church teaching clearly stated in the Catechism and the Canon Law?

What sources are you expecting to find other than Catechism and Canon Law?

If you are still confused after reading the Catechism and the Canon Law, then please, discuss it in person with your priest.

I would add, you seem to have a great many personal opinions about how you think the Church should teach or how they could better make rules.
The Church is teaching the teachings of Jesus Christ.
The Church really doesn’t care about your opinion any more than it cares about mine .

 

[OSN]

Did you read the sources I posted?

The answer is quite clear from the sources that this is not my personal opinion.

Are you just looking for somebody to give you the answers you want to hear, instead of the actual Church teaching clearly stated in the Catechism and the Canon Law?

What sources are you expecting to find other than Catechism and Canon Law?

If you are still confused after reading the Catechism and the Canon Law, then please, discuss it in person with your priest.

you could of been more charitable by leaving it at , did i read the sources you posted. The answer would be no I didn’t as I didn’t see the links at first.

There is no need I see to continue a discussion with you from here on out.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

Sorry but I’m not seeing any lack of charity here. Good day.

 

[OSN]

It is hard to see charity when one is looking for trouble only. Good Day.

 

[OSN]

So again, I am trying to see where there is any explanation as to what Catholics are supposed to do, if they do not want children but want to be married, the links provided to provide explanations but I do not see any information on what I am specifically asking, and am hoping there are no more replies that are seeking drama .

 

[TheLittleLady]

Permanent intention against children “disqualifies” (in official language “is an impediment”) to a valid marriage.

This and other things that impede marriage are listed in the Canon Law link above.

 

[TomH1]

The Church does encourage Catholics to marry Catholics but does not forbid to marry non-Catholics.

If a Catholic is getting married he/she must marry in the Church according to canonical form unless the bishop gives permission for the couple to marry elsewhere.

For a Catholic to marry a non-Catholic it depends on who s/he’s marrying on what’s required. If s/he’s marrying a validly baptised non-Catholic Christian, e.g. an Anglican (Episcopalian) the Catholic requires permission from her/his bishop. If the permission isn’t obtained, perhaps due to some oversight, and the marriage goes ahead it would be illicit but still valid. However, if the Catholic is marrying a non-baptised person dispensation is required. The non-Catholic may not be baptised because the Catholic Church considers their baptism invalid, e.g. Seventh Day Adventists, or the non-Catholic belongs to a Christian community that doesn’t practise baptism, e.g. Salvation Army. Similarly, this will apply if the non-Catholic is of another faith, e.g. Judaism, or of no faith. The Catholic party requires a dispensation because this situation is an impediment called ‘disparity of cult’. If the dispensation was not obtained but the marriage went ahead it would be invalid.

If a Catholic is marrying a non-Catholic, the Catholic party is required to make promises that the Catholic party will do everything s/he can to maintain her/his faith and to ensure that any children born are baptised and educated as Catholics. The non-Catholic party has to made aware of this but is no longer required to make any undertakings themself.

I do believe that the Church does not permit a marriage to take place where either one or both parties intends to exclude children. All marriages must be open to procreation and both parties must be capable of the natural act that brings procreation about.

I have not provided links: You will find this information on the websites of most Catholic dioceses.

 

[dochawk]

Are you saying that as your personal opinion , or as a theological answer that the Catholic Church promotes

It’s a very basic component of the definition of marriage. It’s not “don’t” but “can’t” be married without children.

 

[Wife.of.Gabriel]

I am trying to see where there is any explanation as to what Catholics are supposed to do, if they do not want children but want to be married

Links have already been provided that I would have listed, so I’ll just add that it’s simply not possible to have a Catholic Marriage (Sacramental/Valid) if one or both parties are not open to new life aka children with each marital act or if one or both partners aren’t physically capable (impotent, for example). It’s grounds for Annulment (official Church declaration that a Marriage between a couple never actually existed) if one or both partners are NOT open to having children.

OPTIONS for someone who’s Catholic and doesn’t want kids but still wants to marry:

1. Don’t marry - offer up your suffering of singleness to Jesus, unite your suffering to His Cross
2. Marry, be open to new life and then place for adoption any children you might have in your marriage
3. Change religions?

 

[Bushum]

Change religions?

Or make your own like King Henry. This is part of my theory about why so many switch to Protestantism. It is easy to shop around and find someplace that accepts your beliefs and what you feel the rules should be instead of accepting what the Church teaches us.

 

[Brendea]

Tis bearself is correct however on the openness to having children part it may be wise to consult a preist as there could always be an exception. Ie a medical problem that both parties to the marriage are aware of or the wife needing to take hormone replacement therapy ( birth control) for a genuine medical reason. However if a child was miraculously conceived in those circumstances the Catholic would be obligated to raising it Catholic

 

[lucius2]

Here is what the American counsel of bishops says (easier than interpreting cannons 1055-1165):

" Just as individual states have certain requirements for civil marriage (e.g., a marriage license, blood tests), the Catholic Church also has requirements before Catholics can be considered validly married in the eyes of the Church. A valid Catholic marriage results from four elements: (1) the spouses are free to marry; (2) they freely exchange their consent; (3) in consenting to marry, they have the intention to marry for life, to be faithful to one another and be open to children; and (4) their consent is given in the presence of two witnesses and before a properly authorized Church minister. Exceptions to the last requirement must be approved by church authority."

But hey, maybe you should read it it isn’t that long, and you will find it VERY hard to disagree with anything it says, because it I filled with so much knowledge of scripture and told in a loving an powerful way :
http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG1104/_P3V.HTM

Here’s my two cents and take this in a different way beyond a physical reason (perhaps a financial one [too poor for the moment], they both or even all could change right?) One could possibly be sterile and still with faith of a possible healing per se or even openness to adoption or foster parenting may qualify them for entering a sacrificial marriage as Christians.

 

[lucius2]

Also, I may ruin this with my last statement but I have to say:if your open to acknowledging the healthiness of sexual desire and practicing it, the natural order demands children are a possibility in your heart and spirit. Otherwise if you will not have sex or children in marriage, don’t get married, there’s no reason to. But hey a valid sacramental marriage is harder and more beautiful than a legal marriage, if you are just lonely and want to be chaste but have a best friend then just get a friend… And control yourself, we aren’t animals.

 

[poche]

In order for a marriage to be valid there has to be openness to children.

 

[lucius2]

Could that be an openess to adoption, to helping your brother or sister raise their children? Could that even be an openess to children later after college ? Raising grandchildren together? I think so.

PS:. Miracles happen, if you are sure they don’t then you probably aren’t a Catholic.

 

[lucius2]

I just read something else you said that irks me a bit, the church does stick to the sacraments, matrimony is a sacrement! It is also spoken of by Paul over and over as a visible witness of a wife or husband’s love for their husband or wife of a similar Love and also a metaphor of another covenant (they are both Holy Covenants established by God HIMSELF NOT The Roman Curia [they didn’t make this up, they just help us see what God is telling us]) of CHRIST’S LOVE FOR THE CHURCH WHICH IS THE ‘BRIDE OF CHRIST.’

 

[Cor_ad_Cor]

Bear in mind that many of us in the modern western world have a selfish view of marriage; it’s about me and what I want. The divine purpose of marriage is to perfect in us the love of Christ, which is the opposite of selfish - it’s entirely as giving as possible - not what I want but what God wills. I have to give myself entirely to my spouse and along with that, the life that proceeds from our union. It isn’t up to me to decide. So from that ideological perspective, there’s no sense in getting married without being open to children.