Quite a few dilemmas

[MC2014sd]

First off, I plan on converting into the catholic church, starting RCIA next fall. I have found great peace knowing that there is something out there that loves me, and is willing to forgive me. My personal belief and morals are already in line of that of the Catholic faith. I love everyone on this earth, despite what they believe. I wish only the best for everyone. But I have been suffering from severe depression for years. Every day I just want to make the pain stop. But everytime I try to “end it”, I can’t do it. Every day is a struggle, and it has been this way years. But I don’t want antidepressant. My view on medication Is that unless it is the only thing that is going to keep me alive, I don’t want it. My family has been ruined by drugs. And I already have Him. But, is it okay that I don’t want medication, even though it means I’ll never be happy, and everyday it will be a struggle? I’ve already found peace, and I accept Him and his love, even though everyday I feel unbearable pain.

And, I plan on joining the United States Marine Corps after highschool. I feel that it is what I have been called to do. I wish to join either Force Reconassiance, or their rather young MARSOC. Both are very elite, and both have lots of training involved. Once I become a NCO, I want to be a drill instructor. If you dont know what any of that is, Force Recon is one of the Marines most elite units, doing deep recon and direct action missions. MARSOC, which is short for Marine Special Operations Command, is the Marines special operations division, basically think Navy SEALS or Army Ranger. And Drill Instructors are the Marines name for Drill Sergeant. And before anyone says my depression means I can’t join, your wrong. As long as I haven’t seeked treatment (which I haven’t done in years) or used any medication ( which I have never used), I can enlist. And, as long as He is with me, I know I can make it. But, all of that means I will not have much time for raising a family. It takes a lot of effort to get in, and a lot of training, and when I do finish the intense traing, there is even more training. The current cycle for both of the jobs I want is a year of training, six months deployed, then six months off. But they can modify that. There have been times when a Recon Marine or MARSOC Marine will get home, then he will get a call in the middle of the night from his commander informing him that they have to deploy again. That could just be a story, but still. Marriages are hard in the military, I have heard statistics of up to 80% of all marriages in the military end up in a divorce. However, if I meet that someone, and she is willing to live away from me for the most part, accepting she could get that fateful knock on the door, then yes I would marry. But I dont think I will find that person. But if I do I want to know one thing. What if I don’t want to have children? Can I still marry? My father was born into a military family, and he didn’t turn out the best person. He dropped out of highschool, had a child (me) out of wedlock, and has had a generally difficult time in life. I don’t want any children of mine to turn out like out like that. And I think it would be wrong to bring someone into this world in a tough environment of me not being there for long stretched of time, and having to move every couple of years. I would want my children to have a healthy life, where I could be there for a lot of it, and where he would have a stable home.

 

[Castello]

There are a bunch of "I"s in that post.

How about spending Lent praying and putting it all in God’s hands?

What did Jesus tell us in Matthew chapter 6?

Dependence on God.*

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat [or drink], or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?

Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they?

Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life-span?*

Why are you anxious about clothes? Learn from the way the wild flowers grow. They do not work or spin. But I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was clothed like one of them.

If God so clothes the grass of the field, which grows today and is thrown into the oven tomorrow, will he not much more provide for you, O you of little faith?

So do not worry and say, ‘What are we to eat?’ or ‘What are we to drink?’ or ‘What are we to wear?’

All these things the pagans seek. Your heavenly Father knows that you need them all.

But seek first the kingdom (of God) and his righteousness, and all these things will be given you besides.

Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself. Sufficient for a day is its own evil.

 

[cjmclark]

First off, I plan on converting into the catholic church, starting RCIA next fall. I have found great peace knowing that there is something out there that loves me, and is willing to forgive me. My personal belief and morals are already in line of that of the Catholic faith. I love everyone on this earth, despite what they believe. I wish only the best for everyone. But I have been suffering from severe depression for years. Every day I just want to make the pain stop. But everytime I try to “end it”, I can’t do it. Every day is a struggle, and it has been this way years. But I don’t want antidepressant. My view on medication Is that unless it is the only thing that is going to keep me alive, I don’t want it. My family has been ruined by drugs. And I already have Him. But, is it okay that I don’t want medication, even though it means I’ll never be happy, and everyday it will be a struggle? I’ve already found peace, and I accept Him and his love, even though everyday I feel unbearable pain.

As someone who has suffered from major depression, I can tell you that my life was better by leaps and bounds after treatment. I underwent a combination of medication and therapy that was invaluable in helping me to get my life back on track. I understand your reluctance towards medication, if you are coming from a family with a history of drug issues; however, a lot of drug issues are related to the same chemical imbalances that drive depression and can actually be mitigated with medication. I’d at least recommend seeing a psychologist (therapist) at a bare minimum, if not a psychiatrist.

And, I plan on joining the United States Marine Corps after highschool. I feel that it is what I have been called to do. I wish to join either Force Reconassiance, or their rather young MARSOC. Both are very elite, and both have lots of training involved. Once I become a NCO, I want to be a drill instructor. If you dont know what any of that is, Force Recon is one of the Marines most elite units, doing deep recon and direct action missions. MARSOC, which is short for Marine Special Operations Command, is the Marines special operations division, basically think Navy SEALS or Army Ranger. And Drill Instructors are the Marines name for Drill Sergeant. And before anyone says my depression means I can’t join, your wrong. As long as I haven’t seeked treatment (which I haven’t done in years) or used any medication ( which I have never used), I can enlist. And, as long as He is with me, I know I can make it. But, all of that means I will not have much time for raising a family. It takes a lot of effort to get in, and a lot of training, and when I do finish the intense traing, there is even more training. The current cycle for both of the jobs I want is a year of training, six months deployed, then six months off. But they can modify that. There have been times when a Recon Marine or MARSOC Marine will get home, then he will get a call in the middle of the night from his commander informing him that they have to deploy again. That could just be a story, but still.

I commend your desire to enlist. As a prior enlisted man, I am proud when individuals heed the call to volunteer. My only hesitation here is the prospect of combining your history of depression with a military field that requires regular possession and use of weaponry. While your divorce statistic is wrong (I’ll discuss that below), the military suicide statistics in the past decade are alarming. Here’s a story on rising suicide rates in our military.

Marriages are hard in the military, I have heard statistics of up to 80% of all marriages in the military end up in a divorce. However, if I meet that someone, and she is willing to live away from me for the most part, accepting she could get that fateful knock on the door, then yes I would marry. But I dont think I will find that person. But if I do I want to know one thing. What if I don’t want to have children? Can I still marry? My father was born into a military family, and he didn’t turn out the best person. He dropped out of highschool, had a child (me) out of wedlock, and has had a generally difficult time in life. I don’t want any children of mine to turn out like out like that. And I think it would be wrong to bring someone into this world in a tough environment of me not being there for long stretched of time, and having to move every couple of years. I would want my children to have a healthy life, where I could be there for a lot of it, and where he would have a stable home.

This divorce statistic is way off base. In fact, military divorce rates, though they have risen recently, still only reached 3.7% in 2011 - definitely not 80%. There are plenty of servicemembers whose marriages and families turn out just fine. That’s not to say it’s easy (it’s not), but it’s certainly not impossible.

 

[kmuestwin]

First off, I plan on converting into the catholic church, starting RCIA next fall. I have found great peace knowing that there is something out there that loves me, and is willing to forgive me. My personal belief and morals are already in line of that of the Catholic faith. I love everyone on this earth, despite what they believe. I wish only the best for everyone. But I have been suffering from severe depression for years. Every day I just want to make the pain stop. But everytime I try to “end it”, I can’t do it. Every day is a struggle, and it has been this way years. But I don’t want antidepressant. My view on medication Is that unless it is the only thing that is going to keep me alive, I don’t want it. My family has been ruined by drugs. And I already have Him. But, is it okay that I don’t want medication, even though it means I’ll never be happy, and everyday it will be a struggle? I’ve already found peace, and I accept Him and his love, even though everyday I feel unbearable pain.

And, I plan on joining the United States Marine Corps after highschool. I feel that it is what I have been called to do. I wish to join either Force Reconassiance, or their rather young MARSOC. Both are very elite, and both have lots of training involved. Once I become a NCO, I want to be a drill instructor. If you dont know what any of that is, Force Recon is one of the Marines most elite units, doing deep recon and direct action missions. MARSOC, which is short for Marine Special Operations Command, is the Marines special operations division, basically think Navy SEALS or Army Ranger. And Drill Instructors are the Marines name for Drill Sergeant. And before anyone says my depression means I can’t join, your wrong. As long as I haven’t seeked treatment (which I haven’t done in years) or used any medication ( which I have never used), I can enlist. And, as long as He is with me, I know I can make it. But, all of that means I will not have much time for raising a family. It takes a lot of effort to get in, and a lot of training, and when I do finish the intense traing, there is even more training. The current cycle for both of the jobs I want is a year of training, six months deployed, then six months off. But they can modify that. There have been times when a Recon Marine or MARSOC Marine will get home, then he will get a call in the middle of the night from his commander informing him that they have to deploy again. That could just be a story, but still. Marriages are hard in the military, I have heard statistics of up to 80% of all marriages in the military end up in a divorce. However, if I meet that someone, and she is willing to live away from me for the most part, accepting she could get that fateful knock on the door, then yes I would marry. But I dont think I will find that person. But if I do I want to know one thing. What if I don’t want to have children? Can I still marry? My father was born into a military family, and he didn’t turn out the best person. He dropped out of highschool, had a child (me) out of wedlock, and has had a generally difficult time in life. I don’t want any children of mine to turn out like out like that. And I think it would be wrong to bring someone into this world in a tough environment of me not being there for long stretched of time, and having to move every couple of years. I would want my children to have a healthy life, where I could be there for a lot of it, and where he would have a stable home.

My father is still in the military as a reservist. He was on active duty for a lot of my life. My family moved a lot but each of those moves taught me more about the world. Being in the military doesn’t make you a bad father. It doesn’t even mean you won’t have a “stable” home life. Part of your family’s stability will be that every two years you will move. As a child of someone in the military, it taught me to respect the people and the families of those who fight for our country. It gave me a broader world view than I would have had of we had stayed in the same place all my life.

Being a military brat made me a better person. It could do the same for your future kids.

You won’t be a bad parent because your father was. You just have to make the decision to be a good parent and then live that decision for the rest of your life.

My parents are getting to their 25 wedding anniversary this December. The military doesn’t ruin marriages. My grandparents on both sides were military. They were both married for over 50 years.

 

[agnes_therese]

You’ve already seen that you can’t end the depression on your own. There’s nothing wrong with seeking medical help. It’s a widespread, and FALSE, opinion, that people who are depressed just need to “get a grip.” That fallacy has done more harm than any anti-depressant drug.

 

[rhiannonh]

I am with you on the medication front. In that along with most GP’s in England know they don’t actually cure. What they do actually do is give you temporary release so that you can begin to put things in place that will help you the rest of your life as such. I have no idea if that actually works because I refused prozac based on that I go to a support group anyway and know how gripping they are and also I medically cannot take them as have a history of blood dissorders. Pity the doc couldn’t read my notes but relied on my own proactiveness…


luckily I did

 

[IrishRush]

My father enlisted in the army at age 17 and stayed in it until he retired at age 40. He then went to work for the US government, keeping to the same traveling requirements (moving every 2 years or so). My parents managed to raise a family, quite large actually - 8 kids, and provided a very stable home life for us. Don’t let worries about having a family stop you from enlisting. It’s a great way to grow up for most kids. There are opportunities they’ll have that civilian kids never see.
As far as your depression goes, consider that your family history may be promoting that and once you’re away from that and in the VERY stable life of the military, that may change for you. In the military everything about your life at first is very scheduled. Meals, exercise, work, bed times - all of it is on a schedule that is strictly adhered to, so maybe that will be a stabilizing force for you and could possibly help with your emotional issues.
Speak openly with the recruiter about what your expectations and hopes are. Try to see if this really is something you can see yourself doing for the next 20+ years.
Best of luck to you and God bless!

 

[hand]

There’s nothing wrong with seeking medical help. It’s a widespread, http://addled.info/g.gif