Raging Baptist mother

[ExpectedIrony]

I’m fifteen, I have the Catholic beliefs, and everything…problem is…I’m raised in a hardcore Protestant home, and for the most part society. My mother is a hardcore Baptist, and my dad’s Methodist. Me being Catholic(well having the Catholic beliefs, I haven’t officially converted yet --) drives my mother insane. I have some Saints bracelets and I wear them, and everytime someone compliments them, and my mother is there, my mom just chimes in “We’re not Catholic.” I really wish she’d stop speaking for my beliefs. -- And when I bought them she told me to tell people I’m Baptist…I don’t. She makes me go to the Baptist church with her and my grandma, where the preacher talks about Catholics…-- I watch Mass on Youtube until I can get my own car so I can drive myself…and when I’m 18 I can actually finally convert. I want to go to a Catholic university, and my mom’s like “Okay!” ← Just glad I have plans for my life, and I plan to go to college, then the preacher, who is also a professer at a Baptist college said…that he could make it cheaper for me to go there, and my mom was like “IF YOU WANTED TO GO THERE.” Okay, I admit, that was an extremely nice offer of him, that he didn’t have to do, and besides talking about Catholics him and his family are very nice people, but I don’t want to be basically pushed to be Baptist my whole life. I’m dating a Catholic…and the preacher has a son…who’s like 3 years older than me which I think is too old but my mom- “He’s a cute kid…and he might like you” She knows I have a boyfriend, and she knows he’s Catholic, so I guess her opinion is it doesn’t matter if I like my boyfriend or cheat on him as long as I’m dating a Protestant. I need advice on how to get her to back off or something. -- Sorry this is so long, but help?

 

[jud_cargile]

First and foremost, Satan never inspires obedience. Keep that always! Now, I am a convert and came to study catholicism as an adult. So, my gift of faith and the realization of The Holy Mother Church was one and the same. I came from a protestant background; But, in my twenties I was unchallenged by friends and family in this. So you and I do not share an identical background. You should (as a good catholic) (catholic means universal by the way) obey your parents and honor them (their wishes). I HOPE that you can quietly get good (there is alot of bad “authoratative” sources, including here) on what catholics believe and why. The Chatechism is the source, with the Bible that will NEVER mislead you; But, you might use these few years to learn about the sacrements, teachings and traditions of Catholicism.

I was cautioned and will you that modernism has infected all religions to include catholicism to a very alarming degree. Some theologians and even some priests have put peoples feelings before God’s commandments. Regardless of their good intent, they have watered down the truth. Nowhere in scripture is the truth ever discerned, it is always clearly given as what you shall and shall not do. Christ taught in parables in public because the common man would remember the story and the Pharasies, ect. could not come behind and muddy the water. He always would take the Apostles (whom he gave teaching authority) off by themselves and explained the parable. Whenever anyone tries to interpret anything, remember the third chapter of Genesis, the first " interpretation! So many “catholic” places of learning are full of garbage and you must be VERY careful. There are good places out there like Ave Maria University and others; But, you must find faithful catholics and holy priests to mentor and guide you. As you begin studying, you will understand why I have said all of this.

So, obey your parents, study what and where you can. Keep praying, the best and most productive act we can do on our own, you will find your way and then some!

 

[devoutchristian]

Remember, Protestant communion is sacrilegious so no matter what don’t receive it. Also, once you can drive couldn’t you convert without telling your mom (Sense obedience to parents isn’t required when they tell you to sin).

 

[jud_cargile]

I remember it being pronounced in excathedra that those receiving communion from the ultra conservative catholic factions that have been excommunicated, that the faithful receiving holy communion at those services were receiving a valid host because they believe that it is real. I know of protestants that participate in the last supper believing in the real presence and will not do it if they believe they are not in sanctifying grace, all be it, few and far between. For a practicing catholic who is aware either would be a problem.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

I’m fifteen, I have the Catholic beliefs, and everything…problem is…I’m raised in a hardcore Protestant home, and for the most part society. My mother is a hardcore Baptist, and my dad’s Methodist. Me being Catholic(well having the Catholic beliefs, I haven’t officially converted yet --) drives my mother insane. I have some Saints bracelets and I wear them, and everytime someone compliments them, and my mother is there, my mom just chimes in “We’re not Catholic.” I really wish she’d stop speaking for my beliefs. -- And when I bought them she told me to tell people I’m Baptist…I don’t. She makes me go to the Baptist church with her and my grandma, where the preacher talks about Catholics…-- I watch Mass on Youtube until I can get my own car so I can drive myself…and when I’m 18 I can actually finally convert. I want to go to a Catholic university, and my mom’s like “Okay!” ← Just glad I have plans for my life, and I plan to go to college, then the preacher, who is also a professer at a Baptist college said…that he could make it cheaper for me to go there, and my mom was like “IF YOU WANTED TO GO THERE.” Okay, I admit, that was an extremely nice offer of him, that he didn’t have to do, and besides talking about Catholics him and his family are very nice people, but I don’t want to be basically pushed to be Baptist my whole life. I’m dating a Catholic…and the preacher has a son…who’s like 3 years older than me which I think is too old but my mom- “He’s a cute kid…and he might like you” She knows I have a boyfriend, and she knows he’s Catholic, so I guess her opinion is it doesn’t matter if I like my boyfriend or cheat on him as long as I’m dating a Protestant. I need advice on how to get her to back off or something. -- Sorry this is so long, but help?

Try not to drive your mother insane! Your title says “Raging Baptist Mother” but I don’t see too much rage in your post. Maybe about the saints bracelets, but even then, she is just trying to clarify to others that you are not “that sort of person,” a Catholic “heathen.” LOL I know how Baptists can be.

Look, you know you are Catholic in your heart, don’t make a huge deal of it right now. Or it might become just something you do to get under your mom’s skin…Part of being 15 is finding your own identity separate from your parents. You want to be sure that you are being true to the Holy Spirit, not the spirit of rebellion.

Study the faith. Get a copy of the Catechism, and a Catholic study Bible. Try not to leave holy cards and rosaries all over the house though! You have the right perspective when you say that in just 3 years you will be out of the house and can start going to RCIA to convert. Now, when you do that, you might catch all kinds of heck from your family, not just your mother. But by then, hopefully they will see how dedicated you are, and maybe they will come to accept your faith.

Always stress how thankful you are that they have raised you to be such a good Christian! Because they might not think so, but Catholics were the original Christians…(don’t say that to your mom!). Don’t hit all the hot buttons that Baptists freak out about - Mary, the saints, the Pope, the Mass, etc. Just go ahead and go to the service, and pray in your private time.

I hope your friend (the one you’re dating) is nice and polite to your family! Make sure they see his best side so they can’t hang one thing on him!



I will add you to my prayers! Hugs to you! :hug1::grouphug:

 

[devoutchristian]

1. No Ex Cathedera statement was made on the matter. 2. The ultra-traditionalist have valid communion because they have valid apostolic succession. 3. The licitness of Catholics receiving communion at such churches depends on the status of the individual church.

 

[Contra_Mundum_1]

Unfortunately you can’t do much for now. Just keep doing what you are doing and pray a lot. In a few years you will be free to convert. It is great that your boyfriend is Catholic. Fellowship with other believers is so important. This forum can offer something similar so just feel free to ask questions or ask for prayers. Your mother is probably freaking out because as far as she is concerned you are leaving true Christianity for the whore of Babylon or something Be gentle with her. Learn as much as you can about the Catholic faith and teach her about what we really believe and what our history is.

God bless.

 

[devoutchristian]

Catholics were the original Christians…(don’t say that to your mom!

Why not? Sometimes the truth offends people.

 

[raising7saints]

Dear Expected,

I am trying to think of this the opposite way. I am a mom of 7 and am trying to think how I would respond if my daughter (who is 16) came home and wanted to be Baptist - we are Catholic.

Could you pick one simple thing you like about Catholic beliefs and share it with your mom? Have a dialogue about why you believe what you believe. Reassure her that you are not trying to discount the faith that she has passed on to you. She did start you on your faith journey and faith is a wonderful gift. Ask her to please let you share with her where you feel your faith path is leading you.

You don’t want to have a permanent rift with your mother. She may feel your Catholic beliefs are a passing thing because of your boyfriend. If you can begin talking with her she may not agree if you convert, but she will know what you believe and why. Keeping communication open is important. You may not always practice the same faith but she will always be your mother. Make sure to value her faith beliefs even when sharing our differing views. God only knows if your conversion could spark hers. Pray for the Holy Spirit to guide your words and talk civilly with her about what you believe and why. But start small with just one belief at a time.

 

[devoutchristian]

Learn as much as you can about the Catholic faith and teach her about what we really believe and what our history is.

I second this.

 

[runningdude]

I’m fifteen, I have the Catholic beliefs, and everything…problem is…I’m raised in a hardcore Protestant home, and for the most part society. My mother is a hardcore Baptist, and my dad’s Methodist. Me being Catholic(well having the Catholic beliefs, I haven’t officially converted yet -_-) drives my mother insane.

You have my sympathy. However, I caution you to always be respectful of your mother. I think its reasonable to assume you’ve exaggerated your mother’s response a tiny bit. I will offer some tips to help you keep the peace.

I have some Saints bracelets and I wear them, and everytime someone compliments them, and my mother is there, my mom just chimes in “We’re not Catholic.” I really wish she’d stop speaking for my beliefs. -_- And when I bought them she told me to tell people I’m Baptist…I don’t.

While saintly bracelets are a wonderful form of Catholic devotion, its perfectly acceptable for non-Catholics to use them. You had obligation to tell the seller your religion if you didn’t want to!

However, these are optional for Catholic use, so I’d recommend not rubbing them in your mother’s face. Jesus warns us to avoid showing off that we pray. He encourages us to pray in private:

[BIBLEDRB]Matthew 6:5-8[/BIBLEDRB]

I’d recommend praying using the bracelets only when alone, and generally keeping them out of sight. You aren’t denying your faith - just helping to keep the peace!

She makes me go to the Baptist church with her and my grandma, where the preacher talks about Catholics…-_- I watch Mass on Youtube until I can get my own car so I can drive myself…and when I’m 18 I can actually finally convert.

This is great that you try to watch mass, but until you do convert, you don’t have to go to mass. It is okay to wait until you are old enough to move out convert, because you are obeying the commandment to “honor thy mother and father”. By wanting to join the Catholic Church, you are doing enough!

While attending the Baptist services, “turn the other cheek” whenever the Pastor condemns Catholicism. Christ suffered for 13 hours and died a painful death. You can endure a fiery sermon!

(And as another poster said, avoid receiving communion in a Baptist church - it does not compare to the True Eucharist found in the Catholic Church!)

I want to go to a Catholic university, and my mom’s like “Okay!” ← Just glad I have plans for my life, and I plan to go to college, then the preacher, who is also a professer at a Baptist college said…that he could make it cheaper for me to go there, and my mom was like “IF YOU WANTED TO GO THERE.” Okay, I admit, that was an extremely nice offer of him, that he didn’t have to do, and besides talking about Catholics him and his family are very nice people, but I don’t want to be basically pushed to be Baptist my whole life.

This is a legitimately tough point, as college is extremely expensive. I would recommend choosing your college based on the field you want to work in rather than strictly religion.

Perhaps look at state schools with strong Newman Centers/Catholic Campus Ministry programs. A public college will almost certainly be cheaper than either a Catholic or Baptist college, so your parents will not be able to hold the price over your head.

If you do choose a Catholic school, be prepared to apply for scholarships and grants so that you are not burdening your family.

I’m dating a Catholic…and the preacher has a son…who’s like 3 years older than me which I think is too old but my mom- “He’s a cute kid…and he might like you” She knows

Your mother has no business forcing you to date someone you don’t want to. Be firm about this point.

I have a boyfriend, and she knows he’s Catholic, so I guess her opinion is it doesn’t matter if I like my boyfriend or cheat on him as long as I’m dating a Protestant.

You should listen to your parent’s advice about who not to date (such as dangerous people), or whether you date at all, but again, you mother has no right to force you to date anybody. I hope its not this extreme for you, but this is a point I feel very strongly about…

Overall, be prepared to quietly live as a Catholic for the next couple of years. Respect your parents beliefs, and ask they respect yours. If your endure, the reception into the Catholic Church will be that much more special for you when it finally happens!

 

[devoutchristian]

I am a mom of 7 and am trying to think how I would respond if my daughter (who is 16) came home and wanted to be Baptist

That would be unfortunate, but, we must remember that there is a moral difference converting to Catholicism and converting to the baptist religion.

 

[runningdude]

Unfortunately you can’t do much for now. Just keep doing what you are doing and pray a lot. In a few years you will be free to convert. It is great that your boyfriend is Catholic. Fellowship with other believers is so important. This forum can offer something similar so just feel free to ask questions or ask for prayers. Your mother is probably freaking out because as far as she is concerned you are leaving true Christianity for the whore of Babylon or something Be gentle with her. Learn as much as you can about the Catholic faith and teach her about what we really believe and what our history is.

God bless.

I second this!

 

[bzkoss236]

My fiance’s parents were very “worried” about my being Catholic when we first started dating. Her mother, a convert to Protestant Christianity from a family of no faith background, is pretty hard-core Baptist theology under the name of Non-denom. Her dad is fairly passive aggressive, but had more legitimate worries, but I feel I put his greatest worries at ease. His being that I wasn’t going to force my faith on her and make her convert, which I think is silly to begin with, but I could see that as being a worry. Her mother’s worry is about me “leading her away from the truth”. Though, her mom has started reading into the Catholic faith (even if it started with books about Protestant views of Catholicism). She’s moved onto books by heretical priests “in good standing” with the Church (which I think is bull-honkey). We’ll get into discussions sometimes, but I’ve usually got a good answer for her to chew on. And by my own investigations, I’ve come to love the Church more so than ever before, and my fiance has started to believe in some Catholic views because of doing some reading into things together. And since we started dating she (my fiance) has defended me when people talk about Catholicism behind my back, and she tries to give her best understanding of the Catholic answer. She’s truly a blessing!

It would truly be a miracle if her parents converted some day.

You are in for a haul. My prayers are with you. My only advice is to remind your mother that your faith and beliefs are your business, otherwise why would you have accepted Jesus and his Church to begin with if you weren’t old enough to understand. God bless you on your journey home to Rome!

 

[devoutchristian]

it is okay to wait until you are old enough to move out convert, because you are obeying the commandment to “honor thy mother and father”.\QUOTE]

Parents have no authority to command wrongdoing.

 

[devoutchristian]

My only advice is to remind your mother that your faith and beliefs are your business, otherwise why would you have accepted Jesus and his Church to begin with if you weren’t old enough to understand. God bless you on your journey home to Rome!

I second this.

 

[styrgwillidar]

Another vote here for studying the faith. Your parents are responsible for you while you are a minor. Look for the common ground as well as the difference when talking to your mother, Jesus is our Savior, we are saved by his sacrifice on the cross, etc. You can disagree with her while still being respectful.

Some books you may want to check out, in addition to a Catholic Bible,

• ‘Faith of the Early Fathers’ Volume I edited and translated by Jurgens
• ‘Catholicism and Fundamentalism’ by Karl Keating
• ‘Surprised by Truth’ by Patrick Madrid

Since you aren’t being guided by anyone right now I would stick to books which have the ‘Nihil Obstat’ and ‘Imprimatur’ as your main references.

These are normally indicated in the first couple of pages. These are indications that the book has been reviewed by a diocese and that bishop has found the work free of moral or doctrinal error.

From ‘Catholicism and Fundamentalism’ this statement appears after the ‘Nihil Obstat’ and ‘Imprimatur’:
The "Nihil Obstat" and "Imprimatur" are official declarations that a book is considered free of doctrinal or moral error. No implication is contained therein that those who have granted the Nihil Obstat or the Imprimatur agree with the content, opinions or statements expressed.

 

[april32010]

Remember, Protestant communion is sacrilegious so no matter what don’t receive it. Also, once you can drive couldn’t you convert without telling your mom (Sense obedience to parents isn’t required when they tell you to sin).

wrong,and you have no business encouraging a minor in the sin of disobedience to their parents.

1. How are children of catechetical age initiated into the Church?

Children who have attained the use of reason are of “catechetical age,” normally around seven years. For purposes of Christian initiation, they are considered to be adults.(canon 852.1 and RCIA U.S. Statute18). Their formation should follow the general pattern of the catechumenate as far as possible.

The permission of at least one of the parents is required before such children are accepted into the catechumenate and before they are initiated into the Church. Parents are encouraged to participate in the process of formation to whatever extent they are able and to offer the support and example the children will need (RCIA 254).

 

[Bill_Martin]

Remember, Protestant communion is sacrilegious so no matter what don’t receive it. Also, once you can drive couldn’t you convert without telling your mom (Sense obedience to parents isn’t required when they tell you to sin).

Trying to lead a double life would endanger her relationship with her mother and would be a very bad idea.

 

[vsedriver]

Why not? Sometimes the truth offends people.

because it is disrespectful to her mother and that violates the commandment to honor your father and mother.