Raging sex drive...help!

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First of all - DON’T put words in my mouth.
I said that masurbation is GRAVE SIN - and it IS. I never said that it was “always a mortal sin”.

**What I object to is the perverted **logic that as long as you plan on going to confession later, go ahead and commit the sin. That, my friend is a moronic assertion and is completely against the teachings of the Church. This is what is referred to as the “sin of presumption”.

**I wasn’t **judging the OP - I was rebuking GULDENAT for giving her horrible advice. In his words, "that’s why he’s (God) got priests walking around ready to throw out some absolution", indeed!

Your analogies about sneezing and scratching an itch are equally ignorant because those aren’t gravely disordered actions.

We are called upon to encourage and admonish one another (Rom. 15:14, Col. 3:16-17, 1 Cor. 12:25). Telling a brother or sister in Christ that masturbation is okay and not to feel so bad about it is patently absurd and patently unChristian.
 
First of all - DON’T put words in my mouth.
I said that masurbation is GRAVE SIN - and it IS. I never said that it was “always a mortal sin”.

**What I object to is the perverted **logic that as long as you plan on going to confession later, go ahead and commit the sin. That, my friend is a moronic assertion and is completely against the teachings of the Church. This is what is referred to as the “sin of presumption”.

**I wasn’t **judging the OP - I was rebuking GULDENAT for giving her horrible advice. In his words, "that’s why he’s (God) got priests walking around ready to throw out some absolution", indeed!

Your analogies about sneezing and scratching an itch are equally ignorant because those aren’t gravely disordered actions.

We are called upon to encourage and admonish one another (Rom. 15:14, Col. 3:16-17, 1 Cor. 12:25). Telling a brother or sister in Christ that masturbation is okay and not to feel so bad about it is patently absurd and patently unChristian.
With the number of nineteen year old girls actively throwing their lives in the gutter, I’ll guarantee that there is great rejoicing in Heaven that this sweet girl is trying to be good. I would cry rivers of joyful tears if any of my daughters displayed such sense of love for God and had a conscience like hers. GULDENAT’s advice may have seemed a bit cavalier, but it’s not “bad” advice.

Nobody told this girl that it was okay to “go ahead and commit the sin” … Where in the world did you get that idea???

Of course we should take the Sacrament of Penance seriously and we need to be sorry for our sins, but the reality is that we do tend to fall… sometimes a lot! That’s what confession and absolution are for. The Sacrament of Penance is like medicine to help make us stronger to live in grace and to resist sin. It’s what we all need! There are people that struggle and fall to this sin daily and it hurts. This sin has been the deepest source of disappointment in my own life my friend. God Bless her prescious heart!
:cool: :cool: :cool:
 
With the number of nineteen year old girls actively throwing their lives in the gutter, I’ll guarantee that there is great rejoicing in Heaven that this sweet girl is trying to be good. I would cry rivers of joyful tears if any of my daughters displayed such sense of love for God and had a conscience like hers. GULDENAT’s advice may have seemed a bit cavalier, but it’s not “bad” advice.

Nobody told this girl that it was okay to “go ahead and commit the sin” … Where in the world did you get that idea???

Of course we should take the Sacrament of Penance seriously and we need to be sorry for our sins, but the reality is that we do tend to fall… sometimes a lot! That’s what confession and absolution are for. The Sacrament of Penance is like medicine to help make us stronger to live in grace and to resist sin. It’s what we all need! There are people that struggle and fall to this sin daily and it hurts. This sin has been the deepest source of disappointment in my own life my friend. God Bless her prescious heart!
:cool: :cool: :cool:
:amen:
 
I’m a product of a non-denominational education system. One where we are taught to think by ourselves.
Aah yes, you do not like the dictates of the magisterium (which is a product of several minds and the guidance of the Holy Spirit) because you have decided that you, yourself is the magisterium and will decide unilaterally which teachings are correct and which ones are wrong.

Not very different to Adam and Eve deciding that they will eat the forbidden fruit so that they will be the moral arbiters of good and evil.

All boils down to pride. And look what their pride got us into.
 
Aah yes, you do not like the dictates of the magisterium (which is a product of several minds and the guidance of the Holy Spirit) because you have decided that you, yourself is the magisterium and will decide unilaterally which teachings are correct and which ones are wrong.

Not very different to Adam and Eve deciding that they will eat the forbidden truth so that they will be the moral arbiters of good and evil.

All boils down to pride. And look what their pride got us into.
thats a great way to say that:)
 
With the number of nineteen year old girls actively throwing their lives in the gutter, I’ll guarantee that there is great rejoicing in Heaven that this sweet girl is trying to be good. I would cry rivers of joyful tears if any of my daughters displayed such sense of love for God and had a conscience like hers. GULDENAT’s advice may have seemed a bit cavalier, but it’s not “bad” advice.

Nobody told this girl that it was okay to “go ahead and commit the sin” … Where in the world did you get that idea???

Of course we should take the Sacrament of Penance seriously and we need to be sorry for our sins, but the reality is that we do tend to fall… sometimes a lot! That’s what confession and absolution are for. The Sacrament of Penance is like medicine to help make us stronger to live in grace and to resist sin. It’s what we all need! There are people that struggle and fall to this sin daily and it hurts. This sin has been the deepest source of disappointment in my own life my friend. God Bless her prescious heart!
:cool: :cool: :cool:
**GULDENAT’s advice was more than “a bit cavalier” and your bad habit of inserting words into other people’s mouths is not only annoying - it’s childish. **

NOWHERE in any of my posts was I chastizing the OP. It’s obvious she wants to do the Lord’s will and came here for some help.

**What she doesn’t need is bad advice from would-be Catholics who don’t understand the Sacrament of Reconciliation or what the Church teaches about grave sin. She needs to be told the truth - not some fantasy about God telling us that all we can do is our best - and if we fail, **"that’s why he’s got priests walking around ready to throw out some absolution if need be."

Nonsense.http://forums.catholic-questions.org/images/icons/icon13.gif
 
in addition to all the help eveyone has suggested, you should also check out Theology of the Body by Jason Evert and his wife.
 
GULDENAT’s advice was more than “a bit cavalier” and your bad habit of inserting words into other people’s mouths is not only annoying - it’s childish.

NOWHERE in any of my posts was I chastizing the OP. It’s obvious she wants to do the Lord’s will and came here for some help.

What she doesn’t need is bad advice from would-be Catholics who don’t understand the Sacrament of Reconciliation or what the Church teaches about grave sin. She needs to be told the truth - not some fantasy about God telling us that all we can do is our best - and if we fail, "that’s why he’s got priests walking around ready to throw out some absolution if need be."

Nonsense.http://forums.catholic-questions.org/images/icons/icon13.gif
You obviously don’t get out very much. If you did, you would see what a severely corrupt world this wonderful girl has to live in and how it has robbed her and millions like her of their childhood innocence. Your attitude is lacking in charity and this does more to drive young people away from the mercy of God than you realize.

As far as I am concerned, whenever one of God’s holy priests can “throw” absolution my way I am extremely relieved and greatful to have a God that is so merciful. For without the Sacrament of Penance, I would have long since drowned in the sewage of this world long ago.

By the way, all we can do is our best. Thats EXACTLY why we have the Sacrament of Penence. Jesus and Mary led sinless lives Elvisman… We are going to fail, and that includes you my friend. We need to look inwardly at our failings before we accuse others of giving “bad” advice.

If GULDENAT’S so called “bad advice” gets that sweet girl into the confessional where empties her heart in pure contrition and she gets some spiritual guidance and absolution “thrown” at her, I wish he would visit my children and give them some of this “bad” advice!

:cool: :cool: :cool:
 
reality check,

yep its there. ok

too much compassion can be the same thing as cooperating with evil. im sure elvisman knows just as much about the world as you do tlm08

but the advice that implies one can sin as long as they try hard not to then go to confession is presumption.

a misuse of that Divine Mercy. the fact is every one can practice chastity, 100% percent off the time. it isn’t easy, but it is possible

king henry the whatever, left the church because they denied him a divorce, does that mean it was the churches fault for not being compassionate? did they “drive him away”

no, we are called to proclaim the truth, to all. not to water it down to meet the desires of the current social fashions

G-d does not change, that truth remains the same regardless of time or place.

so it doesn’t matter what the larger culture says, we are to always proclaim that truth to the nations
 
You obviously don’t get out very much. If you did, you would see what a severely corrupt world this wonderful girl has to live in and how it has robbed her and millions like her of their childhood innocence. Your attitude is lacking in charity and this does more to drive young people away from the mercy of God than you realize.

As far as I am concerned, whenever one of God’s holy priests can “throw” absolution my way I am extremely relieved and greatful to have a God that is so merciful. For without the Sacrament of Penance, I would have long since drowned in the sewage of this world long ago.

By the way, all we can do is our best. Thats EXACTLY why we have the Sacrament of Penence. Jesus and Mary led sinless lives Elvisman… We are going to fail, and that includes you my friend. We need to look inwardly at our failings before we accuse others of giving “bad” advice.

If GULDENAT’S so called “bad advice” gets that sweet girl into the confessional where empties her heart in pure contrition and she gets some spiritual guidance and absolution “thrown” at her, I wish he would visit my children and give them some of this “bad” advice!

:cool: :cool: :cool:
And you need to calm down. You also need to learn how to read.

First of all, as I have repeatedly stated, I’m not judging the OP. On the contrary - she was honest and sincere in her plea for help and advice. God bless her for that. By contrast - you refuse to listen - or are unable to do so for some reason.

Secondly, the Sacrament of Reconciliation is not something to be taken so lightly. You don’t sin with the intention of going to confession afterward and everything will be okay. As I have stated - true contrition is not only a confession of sin but a resolution NOT to do it again with the help of the Holy Spirit.

What I objecting to is the repeated bad advice given by poorly-catechized would-be Catholics who go around spewing half-truths and falsehoods about the faith.

Let me give you some advice:
Read the Catechism - and your Bible. Then, maybe you can give some sound advice to a person who wants to know about the faith and what her responsibilities are.
 
To not sin is right. Of course.

So also, that people DO sin is a fact, and it is the reason for compassion AND for the sacrament of reconciliation.

The issue is not as cut and dried as might be desired. Would that we could all simply “say no” in our lives: then of course there would be no need for confession: only for baptism.

Moreover, with the amount of emotional abuse, neglect, abandonment, dysfunction, etc. from which so many young people grow up and by which they are nurtured, people are damaged psychically in amounts and depth light years beyond the imagination of people who have been spared such and whose emotional nourishment was generous. (I often speak about the studies done in neo-natal clinics where comparisons were made between American units which had the latest technological advances and finest medical equipment money could buy vs.the clinics in Mexico which had next to nothing except nannies to hold the babies. Needless to say, the death rate in the American units was SIGNIFICANTLY HIGHER, and the conclusion was that the touching, the warm skin, the TLC, the human nurturance of those loving nannies was far more health-giving * than sanitary, medically perfect clinical care that did NOT have human love and compassion.) Anyone unsympathetic to the struggle of those who ARE so damaged (especially as concerns the sexual identification of a person and its extremely deep root connection to the moral core of his being) may be putting himself into a box where HIS final judgment will perhaps also be severe and unsympathetic.

It has been perhaps THE MOST IMPORTANT THEME of Catholicism that Jesus Christ came TO FORGIVE SINNERS. “I came to save sinners, not the just.” Jesus’ story of the prodigal son could not be more emphatic, focusing on the fact that “the father RAN OUT TO MEET HIS SON and followed up with a banquet.” Maybe you’ve heard the one about leaving the 99 sheep in search of the one. Or the theme of his public life in which he 1) chose some pretty ordinary, including a few rather rough, men upon whom to build his Church, 2) that he “ate with sinners,” 3) that he said something about forgiveness “seven times seventy seven times,” 4) that he scolded his Apostles for wanting to bring down punishment on someone, 5) that he obviously preferred the company of the “rednecks” of his day over that of the judgmental pharisees and scribes - the litterati…

LOVE, while certainly not intended to enable, IS NOT DESCRIBABLE IN JURIDICAL DICTA: IT SPEAKS IN A DIFFERENT MANNER TO US - HUMANS WITH HEARTS, WITH BROKEN LIVES, WITH PAIN, WITH GUILT, AND WITH TEARS. “Come to me all you that travail and are burdened, and I will refresh you.” Son, YOUR SINS ARE FORGIVEN.

And the comment about not extinguishing the smoldering wick is perhaps one of the most applicable to this thread: the girl IS ASKING FOR HELP.

Forgiveness itself IS THE VERY SOURCE OF THE RECIPROCAL LOVE God wants us to experience, where we find His Heart.*
 
I understand what you’re going through. I’m also a 19 year old girl who had been a slave to impurity, and still struggles with it on a daily basis. Before I was catholic, I had no idea that my impure thoughts and that being impure with myself was wrong. So after my conversion, I had some serious problems learning to stop. Every day is a battle. The awful truth about sexual impurity is that it isn’t something that just goes away. The Deceiver will use everything possible to get you to sin again. Pray daily, and fast if possible.
Reflect on Christ Crucified, and continue to pray the rosary.

To avoid being impure with yourself, make sure you always surround yourself with people and keep busy. Do whatever it takes not to be alone for periods of several hours. Part of the struggle is realizing that being sexually excited is part of our bodies, and is natural. However, we have the choice to act on that or not. We don’t have to serve the Evil One. God gave us a choice— Let us choose him.

I will be praying for you to have the courage and strength and grace to reject Satan’s temptations.
 
hey,

i just realized our signatures mean about the same thing!:eek:

is that bad like if we both showed up somewhere with the same shirt on?🙂
I just realized that too! It would be hilarious to me if we met in person and had the same shirt on! 🙂
 
reality check,

yep its there. ok

too much compassion can be the same thing as cooperating with evil. im sure elvisman knows just as much about the world as you do tlm08

but the advice that implies one can sin as long as they try hard not to then go to confession is presumption.

a misuse of that Divine Mercy. the fact is every one can practice chastity, 100% percent off the time. it isn’t easy, but it is possible

king henry the whatever, left the church because they denied him a divorce, does that mean it was the churches fault for not being compassionate? did they “drive him away”

no, we are called to proclaim the truth, to all. not to water it down to meet the desires of the current social fashions

G-d does not change, that truth remains the same regardless of time or place.

so it doesn’t matter what the larger culture says, we are to always proclaim that truth to the nations
Thank you for stating this. And THANK YOU elvisman for standing up for Truth.
When someone reaches out for help, we are to give them pure undiluted Truth. If they want some watered down crud, they can follow the media and the majority of society.

I don’t think that the poster’s here were being insensitive in giving the Truth. But merely stating what it good and right. And what would make the girl truly happy in the end.

I’m sure we’ve all had our struggles with this. What helped me understand was hearing the Truth, inspired by the Holy Spirit. And how much happier I am…I can not tell you.

“Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!”
-Luke 11:11-13

When someone asks for solid advice (fish, an egg), I would not want to give them the deceit of satan (snake, scorpion). I would want to give them what is good for them. What is nourishing for their soul.
 
Thank you for stating this. And THANK YOU elvisman for standing up for Truth.
When someone reaches out for help, we are to give them pure undiluted Truth. If they want some watered down crud, they can follow the media and the majority of society.

I don’t think that the poster’s here were being insensitive in giving the Truth. But merely stating what it good and right. And what would make the girl truly happy in the end.

I’m sure we’ve all had our struggles with this. What helped me understand was hearing the Truth, inspired by the Holy Spirit. And how much happier I am…I can not tell you.

“Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!”
-Luke 11:11-13

When someone asks for solid advice (fish, an egg), I would not want to give them the deceit of satan (snake, scorpion). I would want to give them what is good for them. What is nourishing for their soul.
indeed, i think many people are so concerned with being compassionate they let it obscure the full truth.

we all struggle with this issue, it is one of the few areas in life where all people can speak with an authoritative knowledge of the subject. everybody lusts. the difference is in how we deal with it.
 
reality check,

yep its there. ok

too much compassion can be the same thing as cooperating with evil. im sure elvisman knows just as much about the world as you do tlm08

but the advice that implies one can sin as long as they try hard not to then go to confession is presumption.

a misuse of that Divine Mercy. the fact is every one can practice chastity, 100% percent off the time. it isn’t easy, but it is possible

king henry the whatever, left the church because they denied him a divorce, does that mean it was the churches fault for not being compassionate? did they “drive him away”

no, we are called to proclaim the truth, to all. not to water it down to meet the desires of the current social fashions

G-d does not change, that truth remains the same regardless of time or place.

so it doesn’t matter what the larger culture says, we are to always proclaim that truth to the nations
👍 👍
 
indeed, i think many people are so concerned with being compassionate they let it obscure the full truth.

we all struggle with this issue, it is one of the few areas in life where all people can speak with an authoritative knowledge of the subject. everybody lusts. the difference is in how we deal with it.
👍 True. True. The truth doesn’t hurt unless it ought
to.

However, there are ways of delivering truth. You can blast someone with it or you can whisper it gently without compromising.

It also depends on the recipient. Some do require a blasting, but I think this girl just needs gentle but firm advice. I don’t think we can berate her more than she has already berated herself. As she said, she cries to Jesus all the time about it.

She needs our prayers more than anything. So I suggest we just commend her to Mary, Mother most chaste.
 
… the fact is every one can practice chastity, 100% percent off the time. it isn’t easy, but it is possible
If properly equiped, everyone can walk a tightrope between two tall buildings… or get a base hit off of a major league pitcher… or throw a knock out punch against an accomplished prize fighter… It isn’t easy, but you gotta admit, it is possible!

:cool: :cool: :cool:
 
To not sin is right. Of course.

So also, that people DO sin is a fact, and it is the reason for compassion AND for the sacrament of reconciliation.

The issue is not as cut and dried as might be desired. Would that we could all simply “say no” in our lives: then of course there would be no need for confession: only for baptism.

Moreover, with the amount of emotional abuse, neglect, abandonment, dysfunction, etc. from which so many young people grow up and by which they are nurtured, people are damaged psychically in amounts and depth light years beyond the imagination of people who have been spared such and whose emotional nourishment was generous. (I often speak about the studies done in neo-natal clinics where comparisons were made between American units which had the latest technological advances and finest medical equipment money could buy vs.the clinics in Mexico which had next to nothing except nannies to hold the babies. Needless to say, the death rate in the American units was SIGNIFICANTLY HIGHER, and the conclusion was that the touching, the warm skin, the TLC, the human nurturance of those loving nannies was far more health-giving * than sanitary, medically perfect clinical care that did NOT have human love and compassion.) Anyone unsympathetic to the struggle of those who ARE so damaged (especially as concerns the sexual identification of a person and its extremely deep root connection to the moral core of his being) may be putting himself into a box where HIS final judgment will perhaps also be severe and unsympathetic.

It has been perhaps THE MOST IMPORTANT THEME of Catholicism that Jesus Christ came TO FORGIVE SINNERS. “I came to save sinners, not the just.” Jesus’ story of the prodigal son could not be more emphatic, focusing on the fact that “the father RAN OUT TO MEET HIS SON and followed up with a banquet.” Maybe you’ve heard the one about leaving the 99 sheep in search of the one. Or the theme of his public life in which he 1) chose some pretty ordinary, including a few rather rough, men upon whom to build his Church, 2) that he “ate with sinners,” 3) that he said something about forgiveness “seven times seventy seven times,” 4) that he scolded his Apostles for wanting to bring down punishment on someone, 5) that he obviously preferred the company of the “rednecks” of his day over that of the judgmental pharisees and scribes - the litterati…

LOVE, while certainly not intended to enable, IS NOT DESCRIBABLE IN JURIDICAL DICTA: IT SPEAKS IN A DIFFERENT MANNER TO US - HUMANS WITH HEARTS, WITH BROKEN LIVES, WITH PAIN, WITH GUILT, AND WITH TEARS. “Come to me all you that travail and are burdened, and I will refresh you.” Son, YOUR SINS ARE FORGIVEN.

And the comment about not extinguishing the smoldering wick is perhaps one of the most applicable to this thread: the girl IS ASKING FOR HELP.

Forgiveness itself IS THE VERY SOURCE OF THE RECIPROCAL LOVE God wants us to experience, where we find His Heart.*

Beautifully stated my friend.

👍
 
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